Keep Your Hands to Yourself
by liljenrocks
Summary: Love is never supposed to be easy. It's even worse when you throw in the imprint! A story about Paul's daughter, Jared's son, and Sam's son.Rated M for language and Lemons! Spin-off of yay4shanghai's A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size
1. Prologue:Sometimes Imprinting is A Bitch

**AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer. I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while. I do, however, own an "I Heart Jasper Hale" t-shirt.**

**This is a bit of a spin-off from the last chapter ("Genitalia") of yay4shanghai's **_**A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size.**_** If you haven't read it or it's accompanying story **_**Enough With the Gravity Moving Already**_**, you need to!**

**This is my first FanFiction story, so please review and be gentle!**

Prologue: Sometimes Imprinting is A Bitch

This moment…this very moment…in all of my 13 years, this was the moment I had been waiting for. Just a mention of the word would send shivers down my spine and spread a smile across my face: IMPRINT. In my mind it was the ultimate happiness, a fairytale I had dreamed of. I knew it would happen eventually. I was, after all, raised by wolves, literally, and it IS part of our nature to imprint.

But this was not how it was supposed to be, this was not the way I had imagined it at all. Most importantly, HE was NOT who HE was supposed to be. Throughout my life, I had been so spellbound with the idea of imprinting, that I would beg my mom and the other imprinted women to tell me exactly what it felt like, so the moment it did happen, there would be no doubt it was the real thing. After hearing the stories, I planned in my mind what would happen after my imprint. There would be violins playing, if only in my head, and it would be at sunset, looking out over the cliffs of LaPush. I would run to my imprinter, jump in his arms, and cry tears of complete and utter happiness, as we walked off hand in hand, planning our lives together.

Instead of the bliss I had imagined, I was chasing a gaggle of wolf kids around the Uley's den, as the men argued, loudly, about whose son (or daughter) would phase next. And then HE came into the room. When our eyes met, I felt that pull, the one described to me by the many LaPush women who had felt it before me. The room silenced, except for two men, my dad and Jared, who both uttered the same word: "Shit."

After a few minutes of silence, the tears did come, but they were not tears of happiness. And instead of saying something romantic, I screamed. I felt my heart splitting into two. I fell to my knees, and I screamed. "Ethan!"


	2. Those Girls

**AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer. **

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while. **

**This is a bit of a spin-off from the last chapter ("Genitalia") of yay4shanghai's **_**A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size.**_** If you haven't read it or it's accompanying story **_**Enough With the Gravity Moving Already**_**, you need to! And I am very fortunate that she reads all of my stuff before I publish. Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!**

**I do, however, own a "Seth Clearwater: Braver than you since 1992" button.**

**This is my first FanFiction story, so please review and be gentle!**

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**Chapter 1: "Those Girls"**

**Trisha's POV**

Talking so whimsically about imprinting makes me sound like one of "those girls." "Those girls" that cannot survive without a man by her side, that dreams of the day she can greet her husband at the door, martini in hand, dinner on the table, and pearls around her neck. Or "those girls" that want nothing out of life but to pop out a few kids, content to drive the school carpool and arrange their lives around piano lessons and Girl Scout meetings. Even at the age of 13, I know I am not one of "those girls!"

Not that I don't want those things, because I do. I want to eventually be a good wife and mother. In my mind, though, imprinting wasn't just about creating baby wolves. It was about finding your equal, the one made just for you, willing to live for you and help you do whatever to make your dreams a reality.

Now, as a 13-year old girl, I have a lot of dreams! Not silly ones either. I don't sit around all day and practice writing my name combined with the latest teen heartthrob's in my notebook. No, I am so not one of "those girls." Dammit, I am Trisha freakin' Wise, daughter of Paul and Rachel Black Wise, niece of the Alpha and biggest bad ass on the planet, Jacob Black and his wife, the sparkilicious Renessmee Cullen Black. I am the granddaughter of the wisest man I know, Billy Black, and great-great granddaughter of the chief, Ephraim Black. My dreams lie in them, in my past, in my blood.

My dreams come from years of watching strong women take control and, even though their husbands, sons, and boyfriends had no idea how they did it, they could swing an argument in their favor, simply by a look. Even as housewives and mother, martinis and pearls were the farthest things from their minds. They were the life-givers, without whom the pack could not have survived. Those women, those imprintees, or wolf-girls, as the call themselves, had their equals chosen for them by the universe but went on to prove their value and worth was more than just sex and reproduction. (As my mom has always said, "Hun, you are worth so much more than what's between your legs.") But if the universe had chosen HIM as my equal, what does that say the universe thinks of me?

My family has always taught me that to honor the past we must create a better future, and my dream, my way of creating a better future, as cheesy as it may be, is to become a teacher, to pass on all the pride and love I had to the younger Quileutes . After that, I had every intention of being Ethan's wife, his equal, and the mother of his children. Well, that dream was pretty well fucked now!

Before tonight, other than Ethan, the most important man in my life was my dad, the loud, tough, and according to Uncle Jake, sometimes pain in the ass, Paul Wise. I had him wrapped around my little finger. I knew it, he knew it, and neither of us cared a bit. All I used to have to do was look at him with my big doe eyes, stick out my pouty lip, and say, "please, Daddy," and he would give in to anything I demanded. He had raised me never to be one of "those girls." And one of the things that hurt so much about tonight was knowing his "Shit" and Jared's "Shit" were for two completely different reasons. I knew my dad had hated the thought of someone imprinting on me. But I also knew he worried everyday that that person might be Ethan. Dad's "Shit" was almost a "Shit" of relief or maybe even pride at the thought that his daughter might be the next "Alpha wife." Even before tonight's imprint uproar, my dad and I's relationship was becoming more and more strained. Most all of that stemmed from one person, the person he feared I would choose over him, the person slowly making me resent him, the person my dad knew I loved with every inch of my being, my best friend, my true soulmate: Ethan Wahalla. For him, I would become anything, even one of "those girls."

But Ethan wasn't here right now, and instead of being the strong, "never-let-'em-see-you-cry" girl I was raised to be, I lay on the Uley's den floor, curled in a ball, sobbing, screaming Ethan's name, while the rest of the room remains at a standstill. My mom (officially, now my hero) broke the silence, "Paul, get her the hell out of here!"

As my dad slowly began to cradle me in his warm, loving arms, I looked up into HIS eyes, now also veiled in tears (though I'm not sure if they were tears of joy, disappointment, or fear, knowing when Ethan found out what had happened, there would be hell to pay). HE started to move towards me, to say something, but I cut him off. I tried to search in my mind for the most hurtful thing I had ever heard anyone say, and as much as I wanted to crush him, something, whether that be the imprint or just my better nature, only allowed me to whisper harshly, "No, no, no, it's not supposed to be you."

I buried my head into my dad's chest, holding on to him for dear life, like I used to do when I would wake up from a nightmare or when I'd come home from school after hours of putting up with the wolf-boys making fun of me. As he lowered me into the car, I tightly closed my eyes, thinking to myself, "Maybe, any minute, I'll wake up and this will have all been a big joke." He shut the door and I listened to the cacophony of voices outside the car. The wolf-girls voices tainted with all emotions, from excitement (Leticia squealing) to worry (Kim crying, begging Jared to find Ethan) to anger (Emily asking my mom why in the world I would scream like that).

"Jared, where the hell do you think you're going?" I knew that voice. That was Sam or, as Aunt Nessie liked to call him, "the other Alpha."

"Where do you think I'm going? I'm going to find my son. He needs to hear about this from me. Or would you rather have David go try to find him?" And that, that voice was the voice of my supposed-to-be future father-in-law, Jared. I smiled at his curt tone, and relished at the thought of Ethan beating the living shit out of my imprinter, Sam's oldest son, David Uley. It would never happen, though. While Ethan may have been the brains, David was definitely the brawn, and a fair fight, it would not be.

The next voice I heard before we could escape was deep and quiet, almost like a whisper. "Would it be okay if I came over later? To make sure she's okay."

I heard my mom sigh, "I don't know if that's such a good idea."

"No, it's a great idea. Give us time to get her home and settled, then you and your dad come by. Don't worry, David. We'll get this straightened out." Damn my father! How dare he?! Of course, he had already started planning the wedding and naming our children.

I heard mom grunt as she slumped into the passenger's seat, while dad walked around to the driver's side.

"Mom?" I said, softly.

"Yes, pumpkin?"

"This isn't going to be okay, is it?"

"Everything will work itself out." That was my mom's answer for any question whose answer she knew would only break my heart.

Her answer was the only confirmation I needed to know that this was only the beginning. This was going to be the toughest thing I would ever face in my life. "Those girls" would never have to deal with anything like this. And the romantic, fairy-tale notion of imprinting I had once had, left with my dreams.

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***NEXT CHAPTER: "Why It Should Have Been Ethan"**


	3. Why It Should Have Been Ethan, Part I

**AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer. **

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while. **

**I do, however, own a "Jasper Hale: Smoother than You Since 1843" button.**

**This is a bit of a spin-off from the last chapter ("Genitalia") of yay4shanghai's **_**A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size.**_** If you haven't read it or it's accompanying story **_**Enough With the Gravity Moving Already**_**, you need to! And I am very fortunate that she reads all of my stuff before I publish. Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!**

**This is my first FanFiction story, so please review and be gentle!**

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Chapter 2: "Why It Should Have Been Ethan: The Early Years"

I curled myself up in the backseat, biting my bottom lip, trying to remember to breath. Dad turned back to me and smiled, patting me on my knee. I didn't smile back. I didn't even entirely meet his eyes. "Congratulations," Dad said, sweetly, proudly, confidently. I heard Mom grunt and decided it was best to keep my mouth and eyes shut until we got home. I wanted to be left alone. Well, not alone. I wanted Ethan. I needed Ethan.

Ethan and I's relationship is as old as me, it's just taken different names and appearances over the years. We spent our early childhood, from my birth until I was about three-years old, as playmates. Because our moms were close friends, everyday was spent together, whether we were at each other's houses or at the beach in La Push. Just a year older than myself, he was like a big brother to me. Ethan was my protector and I was his shadow, following him anywhere he went. He was always patient with me and we shared everything. We even got chicken pox at the same time, followed by identical pink calamine lotion faces.

As we grew, our friendship did too. We spent every weekend together, having the best sleepovers, complete with Superman movies and smores. (To this day, I can't eat a smore without thinking of Ethan.) On my seventh birthday, Ethan kissed me for the first time. It wasn't much of a kiss, just a soft peck on the lips, interrupted by his annoying little brother, Taylor, who was immediately chased out of the room and left to "play with the Uley twins." ("Playing" with the Uley twins, David and Mark, usually meant wrestling matches, of which no one but them won. Ever. Even today, when someone threatens to make you "play with the Uley twins," you run.) We shared two more innocent little kisses, but they meant so much more to me. Being the naïve child I was, I was positive that meant we were getting married and was convinced, because we had kissed, that we would be having a baby. I walked around for a week with a pillow under my shirt before anyone asked me what the hell I was doing. That brave soul happened to be Grandpa Billy.

"Good morning, Grandpa Billy. Good morning, Charlie," I said, as I waddled into the Black family kitchen.

Billy and Charlie glanced at each other, utterly confused, before Billy looked at me, cocking his head to the side, and scratching his head, obviously deep in thought, before sighing, "Baby girl, why do you have a pillow under your shirt?"

I gave him a toothless grin, having just lost my two front teeth, and said, "I'm getting ready for the baby."

Grandpa Billy scrunched his face, "what baby?" He sounded a little panicked, probably thinking Mom and Dad were expecting another little pup.

I giggled, "Ethan and me's baby. We kissed and now we're getting married and having a baby." I patted the pillow, smiling, before continuing with my story, "I think it will be a baby boy. What do you think, Grandpa?"

Charlie squirmed in his seat, covering his mouth, trying to keep from laughing, as Grandpa Billy pulled me up into his lap. "Trisha, has your mommy talked to you about where babies come from?"

"No, but I saw Aunt Kim and Uncle Jared kiss, and then they had baby Amber. Remember, Grandpa?" Grandpa Billy then proceeded to tell me that babies didn't come from kissing, but he wasn't telling me where they came from, and that if he heard of that "Wahalla brat" ever "violating" his granddaughter again, he would have Charlie take Ethan to jail. Well, that was enough to scare me away from kissing for at least four years!

Even without kissing, my love and admiration for Ethan never wavered. And, at the age of 11, I, well, I started noticing things about him, things that made me blush. Like the twinkle he would get in his eyes as Grandpa Billy and Sam told the legends at the bonfires. Or the way he smiled as his heart swelled, hugging Amber to his chest after rescuing her kitten from the tree in their front yard. Those innocent things made me blush because more than anything, they were glimpses into his soul, things other girls probably saw as minute details to a "hunky beef-cake" (A phrase I learned from Aunt Leah). I was changing, too. I was no longer the little sister who needed protecting and did whatever he wanted. I was my own pre-teen woman, determined to make my place in the world. I think Ethan liked that about me. Before long, people started talking about Ethan and me. It didn't bother me at first, but then my family joined in. At one of the bonfires, I couldn't quick looking at Ethan, as he followed his dad around, like (pardon the pun) a little lost puppy, hanging on every word Jared said. I wasn't really paying attention to anything else, until I heard Uncle Jake say, "Is it my imagination or is Trisha completely in love with Ethan? She looks like she's undressing him with her eyes. And when he talks, it's like she stops breathing."

Daddy snarled, while Mom responded by smacking Jake on the head, "Jake, she's 11! Please!" I don't think any of them knew I had heard them, and I, being the great actress that I am, played it off. That is, until the words and thoughts and feelings kept replaying in my head. Was I "in love" with Ethan? I knew that I loved him, but being "in love" was different. I didn't think about anything else that night. Even as the dinner was served and legends were told, my mind never closed from the thoughts of Ethan. I thought about how it made me feel to see him smile or laugh, or how I usually knew what flavor of ice cream he wanted before he knew, or that, even on my worst days at school, his polite "Hi Trisha!" in the cafeteria, as he sat next to me, made all the horribleness fade away. And those small trivial things gave me my answer. Right in the middle of Sam's part of the legends, a lightbulb went off. I WAS IN LOVE WITH ETHAN! I stood up off the log I was sitting on and forcefully yelled, "I am!" Well, of course, no one else knew what the hell I was doing, so again, I acted and said, "I am going to get another soda! Anyone else want anything!" Everyone stared at me, as my eyes got big and I stumbled to the drinks. I felt someone behind me, unsure of who it was.

The person spoke, asking, "What was that all about?" It was Ethan. I smiled and turned around.

"A lightbulb just went off," I said.

"Okay, whatever, Trisha. You know, sometimes I really worry about you," he sighed, shaking his head, "Walk down to the shore with me."

"Why? So I can mess up my new Converse," I said, innocently flirting.

"No, I really want to try to see this kick-ass constellation, and we can't do it with all this light around," Ethan said.

"Oh, yes, the bonfire outshines the stars in the heavens!" I said, looking as Ethan started to pout, "Fine, you big baby! It's not like I haven't heard this legend about a gabillion times, anyway."

He grabbed my hand and smiled, walking me farther away from the bonfire. I closed my eyes, taking in the scent of the ocean and then feeling Ethan stop walking.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Trisha, can I ask you a question?"

"Of course," I said rolling my eyes slightly.

"Well, I've been thinking about when we were younger, and thinking how we did everything together, and I was remembering those times we kissed," he said, so matter-of-fact. Oh, shit, where could this possibly be going? I nodded for him to continue. "Do you think it would different to kiss now? You know, since we're older."

I thought about what I should say, but I couldn't say anything. I took a deep breath, licking my lips, pooling all my courage, and said the craziest thing, "We could find out."

No sooner had the words come out of my mouth than his lips were on mine. I closed my eyes and stood on my tip toes, admiring his recent growth spurt, slowly putting my arms around his neck. He pulled me close to him, as we both moved our mouths, neither one really knowing what we were doing. I could feel the need for oxygen, but there was no way I was letting him go. Eventually, after who knows how long, we both pulled away. I didn't let go of his neck, couldn't, wouldn't let him go. He smiled down at me and kissed my forehead. Now, I have been kissed on the forehead many times, from men ranging from Uncle Jake to Charlie Swan, but Ethan's kiss was different. It was like fire, and I almost wondered if or hoped that there would be a mark left where his lips had touched. He hugged me closer whispering in my ear, "I like you, Trisha. I really, really like you. I _like_ like you."

I smiled so big, my cheeks hurt, and pulled away to look in his eyes. "I _like _like you too!" He pulled me back to his chest and ran his hands along my back until we heard it, the giggles.

"Ethan, what was that?" I asked, a little worried.

"Whose there?" he asked, holding my hand and pulling me back towards the bonfire.

"_Ooh, I like like you, Trisha_," David Uley said, doing a high-pitch impression of Ethan, making kissing sounds, and coming from behind a rock with Taylor and Mark in tow.

The three boys fell on the sandy beach, rolling and cackling until several of the wolf dads came to find out the source of the commotion.

"What's going on over here?" Jared asked, a slight smile on his face. I let go of Ethan's hand, as my dad and Uncle Jake followed him.

"Why don't you ask, Kissy McKisserson, and her boyfriend, the Duke of Face Sucking?" David said, still laughing but with a proud look on his face. I was secretly wondering how long he'd been holding on to the little insult, waiting for the time to use it, because I knew there was no way in hell he thought it up himself.

"Who the hell's kissing my daughter?!" Daddy said through gritted teeth, "huh, who is it?"

He pushed his chest out, looking ready to phase and attack as soon as the culprit was identified.

"Daddy," I said, doing the doe-eyed, pouty-lip thing, "David doesn't know what he's saying. Right, Mark? Right, Taylor?" Those two boys knew not fuck with me or the short-tempered Paul Wise.

"Yeah, Uncle Paul. No clue what David's talking about. Uh-huh, crazy, crazy, crazy," Taylor said running off to Kim.

"Mark?" Daddy looked at him with questioning eyes.

"I do believe that David is mistaken. I don't recall seeing any 'face sucking,'" Mark said, actually making the quote signs with his fingers, as I watched David trying to figure out several of the words Mark used in his explanation.

Daddy huffed, walking back towards the bonfire. We all followed. I didn't hold Ethan's hand again that night. I didn't hold it again for a long time. As soon as we walked off, the wolf-boys started teasing him about our "special friendship." I saw the look on Ethan's face and knew that things weren't going to be like I expected them to be. I thought we would be able to hold hands and talk on the phone for hours. None of that happened. The next day, Saturday, Mom and Dad had everyone over for a barbeque. I spent extra time fixing my hair, picking out my clothes, hell, I even put on lip gloss. When I walked into the kitchen, the wolf-girls smiled and giggled, knowing my target.

"Where are the boys?" I asked, really only interested in knowing where Ethan was.

"Out back, sweetie," Emily said.

"Go get 'em, tiger," Kim winked, as she stirred the lemonade.

I put my head down, walking out the back door, into a brickwall of tall, copper-skinned men: Uncle Jake, Daddy, and Sam.

"Hey Trisha! You sure look pretty today," Sam said, jabbing Daddy in the side with his elbow.

"Thank you, Sam," I politely answered, skipping to where the boys were.

I watched them for a minute, climbing the tree, pretending to fight vampires.

"Hey guys!" I said, walking up to the tree, putting my foot on the first branch, ready to join them.

"No girls allowed!" Taylor spat in my face.

I could tell the men behind us had lowered their conversations to a lull, hoping to hear the strange interaction between us. I stood there for a second, looking at each of the older boys' faces, waiting for one of them to intercede on my behalf. I looked at Ethan, almost begging him to do something, anything. He looked away. So, I thought, this is how it's going to be. The boy that I was madly in love with, that had told me he "_like_ liked me" just last night, couldn't even look at me.

"Okay, no big deal," I said as I put my head back down, walking back to the house, past the sea of tanned men, who were still speaking only at a whisper. I opened the kitchen door, trying to run to my bedroom before anyone saw the tears in my eyes. I almost made it, too, but Kim stopped me, saying, "Sweetie, it's going to be okay. They're just silly boys right now."

But I knew it wouldn't be okay, at least not for awhile, because Ethan had more than just hurt my feelings. The boy that I thought I loved, suddenly had me questioning every aspect of "love." I decided, that for my own mental health, I was not in love with him, that way his rejection didn't hurt so bad.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Why It Should Have Been Ethan: The Later Years"


	4. Why It Should Have Been Ethan, Part II

**AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer. **

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while. **

**The only character I own is Jet, and well, he's based on my brother, so that makes it a little weird.**

**Also, the Kim in this chapter is very much based on yay4shanghai's Kim in **_**Jared and the Sociopath He Imprinted On, **_**another great story. **

**Again, very special thanks to her! She rocks! **

**We're getting closer to more M-rated stuff, including a discussion in this chapter about orgasms. If listening to a teenager be curious about sex bothers you, you probably don't want to read the rest of the story, because this is just the beginning! You have been warned!**

**This is a bit of a spin-off from the last chapter ("Genitalia") of yay4shanghai's **_**A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size.**_** If you haven't read it or its accompanying story **_**Enough With the Gravity Moving Already**_**, you need to! **

**This is my first FanFiction story, so please review and be gentle!**

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Chapter 3: Why It Should Have Been Ethan: The Later Years

It hurt, as we distanced ourselves, watching my best friend position being replaced by David Uley, the oldest and least intelligent of the twins. I didn't see that they had much in common early on, knowing that Ethan was one of the brightest stars on the reservation, while David probably would have been long forgotten, if he were not the Alpha's son and the presumable heir to the throne. They shared a common passion, though: a strong desire to join their fathers as protectors of La Push in the forms of big hairy wolves.

My replacement best friend became the wolf-girls, learning as much as I could about the ins-and-outs of who we were as a pack, and though I was not yet an official wolf-girl, most of them didn't mind me tagging along. I loved listening to their stories, having Kim braid my hair, and though, I was a self-proclaimed daddy's girl, I felt special with the wolf-girls. I didn't mind chasing the younger kids around or helping Emily bake cookies for the wolves. Here, with the wolf-girls, I felt needed and appreciated. I could be me.

It was also during this time that I met Jet. Jet was the son of one of Mom's old high school buddies. His family now lived in Oklahoma and he had come to spend the summer with his grandparents in La Push. Mom invited him to our annual "Fourth of July Fireworks Feast," a name clearly thought up by Dad. I was playing "Go Fish!" with Amber, when Jet came through our front door. He didn't look entirely too different than the rest of the La Push boys, but he was taller, buffer, and, quite frankly, he _wasn't_ one of the La Push boys. He was different, a tad exotic, if you can call Oklahoma exotic. I couldn't take my eyes off of him.

"Jet, this is my daughter, Trisha. She's just a year younger than you. I'm sure you guys will get along just fine," Mom said, introducing us, and then walking off to the backyard, yelling at Dad about fire extinguishers.

"Pleasure to meet you," Jet said, nodding his head and sticking out his hand for me to shake.

"It's good to meet you too," I stuttered, knowing I wanted to get this boy as far from the others, quickly. I grabbed his hand, leading him out the front door, "Let's go for a walk and I'll show you around."

"Okay," he chuckled, "Where're we goin'?"

"Around," I said, in my sweet little 12-year old voice. "So, Jet, how old are you? What's Oklahoma like? How long will you be here? Where do you live in Oklahoma? What do your parents do? Do you have any pets?" I'm not sure where all the questions came from, all I knew was I wanted to know everything about him.

He laughed, but was still holding my hand, "Let's see, I'm 13. Oklahoma is really hot right now. I will be here until the first week in August. I live in Oklahoma City. My mom owns a bakery and my dad does land surveys for a natural gas company. I have two dogs and a fish. Does that cover it? I can't remember."

I smiled, "I think so. I like your accent, by the way." It was only a slight accent, a little Southern but not.

"Thanks, I think, I didn't really realize I had an accent. Now, it's my turn. How old are you? What's it like living on a reservation? What is there to do around here for fun? Do you have any pets? Are you allowed to date?" Like mine, his questions seemed to come from nowhere and ran together. His last question made me smile, wondering if it was a question or an invitation.

"I'm 12. Living on a reservation is okay, I guess. I've never lived anywhere else. We usually go to the beach or cliffs for fun. I don't have any pets, but I've been begging my parents for a dog. I'm not really sure if I'm allowed to date, I'd have to ask my Dad," I spit out in one breath.

We walked around to the backyard where the wolf pack, wolf-girls, and wolf kids all stood watching as Jake and Quil fought over a hot dog. "What's with that?" Jet asked.

"Oh, that's just grown men acting like dogs," Emily said, walking from behind us, glaring at Jake and Quil. "Trisha, who's your friend?"

"My name is Jet Ross, ma'am. I'm visiting my grandparents, the Russells for the summer," he said politely.

"Oh, you must be Colleen's son? Of course! Well, welcome Jet," Emily said, pointing to the circle of wolf-boys, "I'm Emily Uley. Why don't you go meet the boys? The two biggest ones are my sons. That one," she said pointing to the biggest of the two, "is David. And that one is Mark. The one between them is Ethan and the one on the end is Taylor. They're Kim and Jared's sons."

"Emily, leave the kid alone! You're scaring him," Sam said, pushing Jet towards the boys.

"Well, I guess I just lost him too! Perfect!" I thought in my head.

"Actually, sir, if it's okay, I'd like to stay with Trisha," he said, again with a polite tone.

The wolf-boys weren't oblivious to what was going on and they glared at me, as Jet made his way back to me, taking my hand again. I think, at this point, I had only known him a total of forty-five minutes, but I _liked_ him. He stayed with me throughout the party, and sat with me as we watched fireworks by the cliffs. Then his grandparents came to steal him away from me.

"Trisha, would it be okay if I called you tomorrow? If it's okay with your mom and dad, I wondered if you might like to go to movies," Jet said with confidence, nodding to my parents, who were curled into each other, smiling.

"Daddy? Would that be okay?" I asked, trying to sound as innocent as possible.

"Well…I guess that would be alright." Daddy said. I smiled at Jet. "I'll even take you guys myself." Wonderful, nothing says a night of romance like Paul Wise sitting behind you at a movie theatre, kicking the back of the seat, when your eyes are anywhere but the movie screen.

"I'll call you tomorrow, Trisha. Sweet dreams," Jet said walking to his grandparent's car.

"Bye, Jet!" And as I turned around, instead of the wall of tan men I had become accustomed to, I turned into a wall of tan boys: Ethan, David, and Mark. I wondered where Taylor was, knowing he would be livid to think he had missed an opportunity to interrogate me.

"So, I guess you found a new kissing buddy," Ethan said, his words harsh and clearly meant to hurt me.

I was beyond pissed. In case he had forgotten, he was the one that made the decision to not be my "kissing buddy." "What's it to you, Ethan?" I searched for my dad to come rescue me, but he had already stepped inside the house. Everyone was inside, but me and the Three Amigos. I stepped around them, glaring, making my way to the door.

They all three turned around, not following me, as Ethan said, "We just don't like him is all. I'm surprised you would. I can only imagine what he thinks of you, if he's already so into you after only knowing you for three hours. What kind of a girl does he think you are?"

David chuckled, elbowing Ethan, "Dude, you would know." Ethan and David laughed, as Mark stood silent. So, then I did the only reasonable, logical thing I could think of. I punched David Uley square in the nose and yelled, "That's what kind of girl I am!" Then I ran like hell to my bedroom, slamming the door for dramatic effect.

Of course, David started bleeding, and then crying, and for a minute I felt bad, but that feeling went away quickly, as he ratted me out to all the wolf-parents. Damn him! There was a knock on my door.

"GO AWAY!" I screamed.

"Yo, Trisha! Calm down. It's Uncle J. Open up and let me in."

I knew this was going to be good. I opened the door, just a crack. "What?"

"I have something for you," Uncle Jake chuckled, slipping a crisp $10 bill through the crack, "Next time, try to take 'em all three out." I wasn't sure why he was paying me for hitting a teenage boy, but I wasn't going to ask questions. He started walking away, before turning around, "You might want to start your own waterworks, babe. The 'rents are on their way and they are NOT happy."

Uncle Jake's evaluation of the parents was not entirely true. Mark had told them exactly what happened, being honest about all what Ethan and David had said. (I would have to remember to thank him later. I was still fuming right now, though.) I got a lecture on the importance of controlling my emotions and not listening to "dumb pubescent teenage boys" as Dad called them. No one was really mad at me. Kim brought me an ice pack for my hand, though I really didn't need it, and even Sam patted me on my back, asking Mom if she had taught me to punch like that.

There was _someone_ that was mad. Ethan didn't talk to me again for the rest of the summer. I spent most of my days with Jet, walking along the beach and learning more about Oklahoma than any one person should want to, until August when it was time for him to go home, and I said goodbye to my first real official boyfriend. Then, as school started, I was alone again. The wolf-boys wouldn't let me sit with them at lunch anymore. Ethan wouldn't even say talk to me at recess or at pack parties and bonfires. I once again took refuge with the wolf-girls. It was different this time, though. It hurt more. It was more than just losing my best friend again. It was like I was walking around in a daze. I couldn't enjoy anything without him. The school year droned on, and the wolf-boys quit coming over, deciding instead to spend their days at the Uley house.

Before long it was winter break, and when Mom asked me what I was going to get Ethan for Christmas, I cried for a week. I thought maybe the new year would ease the tensions, so I decided to muster up the courage to talk to Ethan when we went back to school.

"Hi, Ethan! How are you? Did you have a good break?" I asked, smiling.

He didn't even look at me. He just walked off. I hated this. I just wanted to go back in time and erase the last year. If it would have made him happy, I would have even erased our kiss, though it was one of the only memories that had allowed me to keep from completely going over the edge. I went to the nurse's office, faking a stomach ache. Kim came to pick me up.

"Where are Mom and Dad?" I asked putting my backpack in the backseat.

"Doing stuff. I told your Mom I'd come get you. I think you and I need to have a little chat," Kim said seriously. We drove to the Wahalla house in silence. I looked out the window, watching the beautiful scenery go by, thinking about all the things Ethan and I had done together over the years, and how none of that seemed to matter to him anymore. As we pulled into the driveway and I started to get out of the car, Kim put her hand on mine, stopping me from unbuckling my seatbelt. I looked up at her, she looked upset and maybe it was the streetlights, but her eyes were sparkling as if they were wet.

"Trisha," she said, "do you know about Uncle Jared and I? Do you know our story?"

I didn't know much about it. I knew that Aunt Kim's life before she and Uncle Jared were a couple was not a good one. No one really said anything else about it because bringing it up was a definite mood killer.

"Before Jared, I was a very lonely person. My mom was not a very good mom, not like your mom. I never really felt loved until Uncle Jared, and I didn't really know _how_ to love before him," she turned her face to look out the window. I couldn't really see why she was telling me this story. I didn't see how it had one thing to do with Ethan and me. "And when he said he loved me, I couldn't believe him, I had no trust-- I pushed him away. I did everything I could to keep him at a distance, not wanting to admit that someone could want me." She turned to me and smiled, "But Uncle Jared never gave up. After everything I put him through, he never stopped. I'm telling you this because I want you to know that when you love someone, you fight for them. You fight for love. You forget all the shit they throw at you and you just love them. Just like Uncle Jared did me."

I was crying now, knowing what she meant and having an epiphany about my own feelings for Ethan. I realized that the reason it hurt so much was because I still loved him. Even though he had said mean things to me and ignored me, I still loved him. She knew it, too.

"You love him, don't you?"

I nodded.

"I know my son, Trisha, and I know he loves you, too. He's just too much of a boy to tell his friends to shut the fuck up and let you know how he feels."

Okay, this actually felt worse than thinking he hated me. This meant that he did love me, just not enough to fight for me.

"What am I supposed to do, Kim? Why should I be the only one that has to fight?" I sobbed.

"Because you're a wolf-girl, and we carry that burden better than our men. Sure, they think of themselves as the protectors and the warriors, but where would they be without us? Huh? What would they have to fight for without our love?" She pursed her lips, thinking, and then continuing with her story. "Now, I know you're not an official wolf-girl, but I'm sure your day will come. The question I'm asking you now is if you could choose your imprinter, your soulmate, your equal, who would it be?"

I could only whisper his name, "Ethan. I would want it to be him."

"Then there's your answer. That's why you have to be the one to fight."

I laid low for a few months, waiting for my opportunity to show Ethan I would fight for him, for us. My thirteenth birthday rolled around in February and the promise of Spring lay around the corner. I tried to plan how to let Ethan know how I felt, but nothing seemed to be quite right. So I put it in the hands of fate, hoping that an opportunity would present itself, and I wouldn't be too chicken shit to seize it.

And then it came.

A bonfire, just like all the others before it. I noticed the other boys pestering Ethan, who was refusing to partake in the normal hamburgers and hot dogs, revealing, after watching a documentary about meat processing plants and the cruel treatment of the animals, he was going to be a vegetarian.

"Who the fuck let him watch that anyway?" my Dad asked, as Jared shrugged and shook his head. Leave it to Paul Wise to put it so eloquently.

I could tell the harassment was wearing on him. Ethan's normal smile was replaced with a straight, thinking face. I watched as he got up and started walking away from the bonfire along the beach. I decided to follow him, not closely, just enough to make sure he was okay. He stopped and turned to look at me.

"Ethan, I wanted to say that I think it's really cool that you've decided to be a vegetarian. I know you've always loved animals. I know my opinion doesn't matter much, but I wanted you to know." I turned around and started to walk away.

"Trisha." He said my name! He actually freakin' said my name! I turned back to look at him. "You're wrong," he paused. "Your opinion matters more to me than anyone else's."

That was it. That was all I needed. I ran to him, jumping up to throw my arms around his neck, and planted my lips on his. This kiss was so different than any kiss we had ever shared. It took me a second to realize that he was kissing me back! He moved his hands to my butt, pulling my legs up. I wrapped them around his waist, as he licked my bottom lip, requesting permission for our tongues to touch. Of course, I gave it to him. Our heads moved rhythmically, as he kept one of his hands on my butt, while the other made its way to the bottom of my shirt, then under the hem, up to my breast. I was trying to figure out where the hell he had learned to do that, but at the same, didn't really care. I think at that point, I may have actually moaned, as I could feel something pushing in between my legs. I pulled back for a second and looked at him.

"Sorry," he said.

My eyes got big. "Sorry for what? For kissing me? Please, not again Ethan. I can't take that again," I said, my eyes starting to fill with tears.

"Actually, I was apologizing for the hardness in between your legs." He was actually apologizing for being turned on? It was kind of ironic, because if girls could have a hard-on, I totally would have had one.

"To be honest, Ethan, I would be a little insulted if I didn't feel anything coming from that area," I said slyly.

He laughed and then crashed his lips back to mine. This continued until we started to hear footsteps, and my Dad's booming voice calling me.

"I'll be right there, Daddy. I dropped my, umh, earring, and Ethan's helping me look for it," I was a really bad liar and I knew my Dad was not that dumb, but he took the bait.

"Okay, sweetie. Do you need more help? I can send a couple of the other boys to help look for it."

"No, Mr. W, I think we got it," Ethan said, his hand in mine behind his back.

"Whatever," Dad said walking back to the bonfire. Ethan turned towards me, giving me another quick peck on the lips.

"Trisha, I know that I've not been all that nice to you over the last few months. I didn't quite have the strength to stand up for you. I don't want to lose you again," he whispered, fearing that someone else might decide to come look for us.

"I know, and as much as I want everyone in the world to know how much you mean to me, I am willing to keep 'us' quiet, until your we're ready," I said, also whispering.

"Thanks. Honestly, your Dad scares the shit out of me. But I don't think I can not _not_ see you," he chuckled.

"We'll just have to sneak around, then. You know me, I've always been one for a little adventure." We both laughed, knowing it was entirely true.

So that's what we did, for six whole months. We snuck around. We'd meet at the beach, at the library, at the park, wherever. And we talked, making up for lost time, and kissed, and touched. I told him how much I loved him, and though he had yet to say it back, I knew he loved me too. By this point, he knew every inch of me, touched pretty much every part of my body, and I his. It wasn't weird like I thought it would be. I remembered watching videos about male anatomy in health class and gagging at the mere thought of touching a boy's "downstairs," as Aunt Emily called it. (Aunt Kim used much more colorful words to describe it. And though she loved me like a daughter, I don't think she would have appreciated the fact my hands were all over her son's "one-eyed monster.")

It never went beyond touching, and neither one of us had an orgasm, per se, not that I knew what an orgasm was or felt like. But as time went on, I became curious about it. So I called the sparkilicious one herself, Nessie.

I had had the "sex-talk" with Mom last year when I started my period, but I liked talking to Nessie about things that I couldn't ask any of the other wolf-girls. Partly because I knew she'd never tell anyone I asked. Though, I think she did tell Jacob, I didn't really care, because, like my Dad, I had him wrapped around my little finger.

"Trisha! How are you, young lady?" Nessie asked in a sing song voice.

"Good. Hey, Ness, what does an orgasm feel like?" I said it just like that, too. No pause from the response to her question.

She choked out a cough and said, "Hold on just a second." I heard her moving around and the closing of a few doors behind her, obviously moving to a different room to have this particular conversation. "Okay, now what did you just ask me?"

"I asked what an orgasm feels like."

"Trish, why do you want to know? You're 13, you don't really need to know what an orgasm feels like just yet. Do you even know what that means?"

"Well, I sorta know what an orgasm is. I think it has to do with sex because one time I heard Aunt Helen say when she and Uncle Collin were messing around and he had an orgasm right away, but she couldn't until she got on top and smacked him around a little. And I heard Taylor ask Mark Uley if he had an orgasm everytime Quil said his name, whatever the hell that's supposed to mean." I was trying to get it all out as fast as possible before I chickened out on the conversation.

"Watch your mouth, Trisha…though, knowing who your father is, I supposed I should expect such language." I could almost hear her shaking her head on the other end of the phone, as she took a deep breath. "Okay, I'll tell you, but if anyone EVER finds out I told you this, you will be in serious pain. Don't forget my parents are vampires."

I shuddered at the thought of her parents biting me and muttered, "yeah, yeah, yeah."

"Okay, well, an orgasm is a sexual thing, which means you shouldn't be having one anytime soon, young lady," she said quickly as if it were part of a script she had to cover before getting to the good stuff. "It's intense pleasure and a bit of pain all wrapped up in one. It's like a tingling explosion of euphoria, while you loose control of your body, and give in to being part of someone else, even just for a minute," I cut her off there.

"Wait. It only lasts for a minute? What's the big deal if it's only for a minute?"

"Oh, but it's so worth it. Sometimes it can last longer than that, and sometimes it can happen a few times during one act. With my Jacob," I cut her off again.

"Uh, sorry, Ness, but do you think we could leave my uncle out of this. I'd like to actually look at him again."

"I apologize, Trisha. So, is there anything else you wanted to know?"

"No, I think I got it. Tingling explosion, lasts a minute, yada, yada, yada. But if I think of anything, I'll call. Thanks, Ness. I love ya!"

"I love you, too, Trisha. Call again soon!"

I still had no clue what an orgasm felt like, but that was about to be the least of my problems.

******************************************************************************

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Keep Your Goddamn Hands to Your Goddamn Self"


	5. Keep Your Damn Hands to Your Damn Self

**AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer, which is why she has the money and I don't. **

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while. **

**Again, very special thanks to her! She has been very gracious as both the owner of the characters and as my Beta. She rocks! **

**This is a bit of a spin-off from the last chapter ("Genitalia") of yay4shanghai's **_**A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size.**_** If you haven't read it or its accompanying story **_**Enough With the Gravity Moving Already**_**, you need to! **

**I do, however, own the following conversation between myself and two other teachers:**

*****_**Me (talking about my CPR dummy): He looked like a fine Native American man.**_

_***Kindergarten Teacher: I didn't know you had a thing for Native American guys.**_

_***Fifth Grade Teacher: This is Jennifer we're talking about. She has a thing for guys in general.**_

_***Me: Yeah, it's true.**_

**This is my first FanFiction story, so please review and be gentle!**

**P.S. Again, things are getting more Mature and if that bothers you, sorry. Teenagers think about sex, a lot. **

**********************************************************************************

Chapter 4: Keep Your Damn Hands to Your Damn Self

The sneaking around thing had been fun, but I was getting a little tired of hiding the fact that I loved him so damn much. I was still waiting for him to say it back, but I could be a very patient person, and I would wait as long as it took. I did a lot of lying during those six months. I lied to my parents, to Kim and Jared, to Grandpa Billy, and to Uncle Jake. I lied about where I was going and what I was doing, escaping to secret rendezvous with Ethan. I perfected the innocent routine to a tee.

So, after six months of the sneaking around business, one phone call to Nessie about orgasms, and a hickey that was hell to hide, Ethan and I were making out in the garage at Grandpa Billy's house, while everyone else helped paint the den at the Black house. Uncle Jake had the backseat of an old Chevy van stowed in the garage. I was laying down on it, Ethan on top of me, kissing me passionately, his shirt on the floor, while his right hand massaged my breast through the fabric of my new sundress. He pulled away for a second and looked me in the eyes.

He smiled and said, "You are so beautiful, like a ray of sunshine, brightening my day… I think that's what I'll call you from now on. Ray. Is that okay?"

I ran my hands through his hair and whispered, "Ray that's a wonderful name."

He kept looking at me, tracing my lips with his warm fingertips, before finally speaking, "I'm sorry I didn't say this sooner, but I really love you, Ray."

I smiled back, hugging him to me, whispering in his ear, "You have no idea how much I love you."

He crashed his lips to mine and returned his hand to my breast, deepening the kiss.

I don't know how we didn't hear them. Or why we didn't lock the garage door. But we didn't, and like many times in the near future, fate was not on our side.

The garage door swung open, as my Dad, Jared, and Embry all stood before us, dropping the paint cans and brushes in their hands. And there we were: Ethan still on top of me, my boob still in his hand, and our lips deeply intertwined. I turned and looked at the three giants standing there, as Dad began to shake.

"What the fuck are you doing to my daughter?" Dad yelled, his voice trembling as he gritted his teeth.

"Calm down, Paul. You haven't phased in months. You're doing really well, just calm down," Embry encouraged, walking towards Dad.

Ethan and I were literally petrified. We couldn't move. We stayed in the same position we were in as Dad moved towards us.

"Answer me you little shit! What are you doing?"

His trembling was worse now, and both Jared and Embry, tried to hold him back, as he shoved them out of his way. I pushed Ethan off of me, standing up to look at my Dad.

"Nothing, Daddy. We weren't doing anything." I knew the daddy's girl routine wasn't going to get me out of this one.

"Really! Because to me it looked like he was about ready to round third base and head for home! Am I wrong?!" This was quite possibly the angriest I had every seen my father. He had been mad, a lot. But this, I knew this was not going to end well.

Ethan stood next to me, lacing his fingers with mine, squeezing my hand. "I'm sorry, Mr. Wise, but I love her."

That was all it took. Right before my eyes, my "Daddy" phased into a monster, his clothes ripped to shreds on the garage floor, as he pushed Ethan into the corner, snarling and growling.

Grandpa Billy rolled up in his wheelchair and stopped next to Dad.

"Paul, stop it! Look at your daughter!" Grandpa Billy yelled at him, as Dad turned to see me, staring at him with complete terror in my eyes. This animal that stood before me was not the wolf of Quileute legends, not the protector I had been led to believe existed. This was a creature from a horror movie, and I wanted nothing more than to get as far away from it as possible. I was terrified of my own father.

"Move away very slowly, Ethan," Jared said, softly, trying to protect his son from death at the hands of an angry father/wolf.

Ethan edged his way to the door, as Jared pulled him behind him, running with Embry to the house. "Great," I thought, "Just me, an old dude in a wheelchair, and a really pissed off wolf! This should be interesting."

"Embry!" Grandpa yelled. Embry stood at the door in less than second. "Take Trisha to Rachel, please." Grandpa's eyes were fixed on Dad, as Dad started to whimper.

"Come on, Trisha," Embry said, keeping his eyes on Dad, pulling me behind him, out the door.

Everyone had congregated on the front lawn. Everyone. Most all of the pack. Except for Jared and Ethan, who I imagined must have been at the Wahalla house, away from the giant creature in the garage.

I ran to my Mom, burying my head in her chest, sobbing uncontrollably. (Yes, this and the before mentioned imprint business were rare tear jerking occurrences.) "What the hell happened, Embry?" Mom asked.

"Paul phased. Right in front of them," Embry said, I heard the pack start pacing and mumbling.

Mom paused for a second and then asked, "Them? Who else was in there?"

"Talk to your kid, Rachel. It's none of my business," Embry spat, giving me a disapproving look.

"What happened, Trisha? Why did your Dad phase?"

"I-I-I don't wa-want to talk a-a-bout it. I wa-want to go ho-ho-home," I managed between tears. We walked to the car, as she opened the door for me to slide in. I looked over at the pack in the front yard and found myself scared. They weren't the protective uncles I had once thought of them as. They were like my Dad. They were scary, and even in human form, they seemed more intimidating than before.

I heard Mom ask if Embry would give Dad a ride home, and Embry nodded, still glaring at me through the window. Then I heard Grandpa Billy yell for Sam to bring him some clothes out of Jake's room, as Sam looked to David. David ran in and out of the house in a matter of seconds with a fresh pair of shorts in his hands, practically foaming at the mouth on his way to the garage. I knew David would give anything to be a wolf, and even just spending a few minutes in the presence of one of the boys in wolf-form, was enough to give him a hard-on to last for hours.

Everyone just kept gawking at me and whispering, until I slid down the seat right out of view.

"Do you want to tell me what that was all about? Or do I need to ask your father?" Mom asked, putting the keys in the ignition, turning it over, and peeling out of the driveway.

I shook my head to say no but didn't open my mouth. I knew I was going to be in some serious shit. I looked at her as she hardened her eyes to the road, "That's just fine, then. I'll be more than happy to ask your Dad."

"NO!" I said, "I'll tell you. Just…just wait until we get home please. I need to make a phone call and then I'll spill it all."

"I suppose that's a fair compromise," she nodded.

I knew there was no way my Dad was going to let me out of the house to see Ethan. So, I determined, we would have to take sneaking around and kick it up a notch. I knew what had to be done, and, as soon as we pulled up to the house, I ran to kitchen, grabbing the phone, dialing the Wahalla's number with super human speed.

It rang twice before someone picked it up.

"Hello?" the voice said.

"Uncle Jared, may I please, please talk to Ethan?" I begged.

"Trisha, that's probably not the best idea. Aunt Kim and I would like to have more children, and knowing how your father will react, I don't want to loose my testicles just yet."

"Just for a minute. Please."

I could hear Ethan in the background, begging his dad to let him talk to me.

"Fine. What can I say, I'm a pussy for young love," Jared said, passing the phone off.

"Ray?! Are you okay? What happened after I left?" Ethan said into the phone.

"I'm home now. I haven't talked to my parents yet, but I wanted to tell you…" I looked around to make sure Mom wasn1't within earshot, "I love you and I'm coming to see you tonight. Leave your window unlocked."

"You are adventurous! I think I can do that." I could see him smirking on the other end.

Mom rounded the corner, tapping her foot at me, and glaring.

"I gotta go. The prison matron just walked in, and I think she'll have reinforcements in a few minutes. Remember what I said, though, okay?" I whispered.

"Of course. I love you, Ray. See you later," he whispered back, hanging up the phone.

I hung up the phone, as Mom pointed to the kitchen table. She cleared her throat, waving her hand, inviting me to begin.

How can I say this without appearing like a 13-year old girl with a crush on a random boy? How can I say this so she knows I love Ethan and he loves me? How can I let her know he's my soulmate, when she doesn't even know we've been a "thing" for six months?

Fortunately, I didn't have to say anything.

"Is this about Ethan?" she asked me, pulling my face to look in her eyes.

My eyes got bigger as I nodded to her.

"You thought I didn't know?" She paused, "Trisha, I'm your mother. I see the way you two look at each other, like there's no one else around. I'm a little ashamed that you feel you had to hide it from me, though. I thought I'd always been a pretty cool mom," she said chuckling a little.

I teared up again, "I'm sorry, Mom. I didn't know what to do! I just love Ethan, so much, and his friends would have ragged on him, so we didn't tell anyone. I'm so, so sorry!"

She pulled me out of my chair and onto her lap. "It's okay, Baby Girl. Nothing you do, can EVER make me love you any less." She ran her fingers through my long hair, holding me close to her. "But…"

I hated Mom's "buts" because they were usually followed with a punishment or inquisition. This time, it was the latter.

"Trisha, I need to know exactly what happened. Your father has a temper, but he had to have been really pissed to phase like that."

I snuggled closer to Mom and looked at her, "We were kissing, Ethan and I, and dad, Uncle Jared and Uncle Embry walked in on us."

"Kissing. That's all?"

I pursed my lips, looking down, "You know that van seat in the garage? We were laying on it, kissing. Ethan was on top of me, his shirt was off, and his hand was on my boob. That's what Daddy saw."

I heard her sigh, but I couldn't look at her, too embarrassed to see the disappointment in her eyes. "You're not having sex, are you, Trisha?"

I jumped a little just hearing her say the word "sex" and shook my head, "No, Mom! And I won't for a very, very long time!"

The phone rang then, and I crawled off Mom's lap, as she answered the phone.

"Hello," she paused, answering the phone. "Thanks, Embry." She turned and looked at me. "Your dad and Embry will be here in a minute. I want you to go upstairs and let me talk to your father."

I nodded, "Okay. Thank you, Momma. I love you."

"I love you, too, but you're not off the hook yet. We won't talk about this anymore tonight. But prepare yourself for breakfast in the morning," she said, pushing me up the stairs, as Embry's truck roared into the driveway.

I walked to my room, shutting the door behind me, but listening to the voices filter in the den.

"Hey guys," Mom said very nonchalantly.

"How's she doing, Rach?" Sam? Why the hell was Sam here? And if Sam was here, oh fuck, no! The twins!

"I don't know why she's so upset. I think it's cool to see the wolves. She's just being a total chick!" David, the genius, said.

"Shut up, David," Embry said slapping the back of David's head.

"She'll be okay. I think Paul and I need to have a little discussion," Mom answered back.

"Do you want me to stay, in case it gets too heated?" Sam asked.

"No, take the boys and home. I think I can handle my husband," Mom said, shooing Sam and the twins out the door, as I heard Dad grunt from the couch. "Embry, hold on a sec."

I could tell she was waiting for Sam and the boys to get in the truck before she said anything else to Embry. "Tell me what happened, Embry."

"It's not really that bad. They were going at it in the garage and we just happened to walk in. Ethan said he loved Trisha, and Paul phased," Embry said. "Shit, Rach, I wish you could have seen her face. She was scared to death. But she wasn't just scared of him. It was like she could see all of us, all the wolves, and she was terrified. I had no idea what to say to her."

"It's okay, Em. She'll be fine. Now, I just have to deal with my lug of a husband," Mom chuckled.

"Rach, will you tell Trish I'm sorry. I feel like I was really cold to her, but I was embarrassed. For Paul, for all of us," Embry said, walking off.

"Sure thing," Mom said, shutting the front door. Then, all hell broke loose, and I remembered again why my Mom was my hero.

"Paul, what the FUCK were you thinking? Do you realize what you could've done? You could've hurt Trisha! You could have hurt Ethan!" Mom yelled, lacing her words with venom.

"Ethan, yeah, God forbid," Dad sighed.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Your daughter will never look at you the same again. You think you can live with that? Your little girl terrified of you?! Hating you?!" Mom's voice got louder, and the guilt swelled inside me, listening to her tear into Dad.

"You didn't see it, Rachel. You didn't see the way they were kissing. My little girl, laying under some sex-crazed teenage asshole. No one should touch her the way he was touching her. And to say he loves her! Give me a fucking break! I was just protecting her! Doing the job I signed up to do thirteen years ago when I held her in my arms for the first time! God, Rachel!" I could hear the hurt in Dad's voice, and it was enough. I had to get out of here, now.

I opened my window, silently slipping into the darkness. I walked down the road to the Wahalla house. The lights were on in the kitchen downstairs, and I could see Jared at the table, reading a book called _Talking to Your Son About Sex_. I giggled a little, before finding my way to the backyard, shimmying up the trellis outside Ethan's window. I saw him standing at the edge of the bed, pacing back and forth. I tapped on the window, pushing it open and slipping in.

"Ray!" He said, softly. He pulled me into a rough kiss, as I wrapped my legs around his waist. Pulling our lips apart, he said, "I'm so sorry! This is all my fault. I should've heard them coming. I shouldn't have been so scared of your Dad. Why did I let him back me into a corner like that?"

He started to continue his rant, but I put my finger on his lips.

"Ethan, just shut up and kiss me," I said, as I leaned into him and he complied with my wishes, walking backwards to lock his bedroom door, before carrying me to his bed, laying me down carefully. I licked his lips, practically shoving my tongue in his mouth, needing to be as close as possible to his warmth. He crawled between my legs, and I felt the usual hardness coming from his pants, and he moaned, running his hands down my sides to the hem of my dress.

The kisses continued, as his hands explored my thighs, first the outer part, before slipping his hand between my legs. He stopped for a minute, pulling away looking at me.

"Ray," he whispered, kissing my collarbone. "Can we talk for a minute?"

"You can always tell me anything," I whispered back, pushing a few strands of his beautiful black hair off his forehead.

He ran his thumbs along my jaw and cheekbones, gazing into my eyes with his gorgeous mahogany brown eyes. "I know. I don't trust anyone as much as I trust you." He gave me a quick peck on the lips. "I can feel the change coming. You know? The wolf-change. It won't be long. Not for me, or David."

Why was he telling me this? In case Ethan had forgotten, we had just almost been killed by a giant wolf, the same type of wolf that I had watched the wolf-boys fawn over throughout the years. Wolves were the last thing I wanted to discuss. But I loved Ethan, and I listened to him.

"When it happens, Ray. I don't want you to ever be scared of me. And I really want…I want you to be the one…my imprint. I want you to be my soulmate. I always have, even when I didn't show it. I've always loved you. Always." He kissed my lips again, sweetly, sincerely.

I smiled up at him, "I would be honored to be yours, forever. To be your wolf-girl."

He chuckled at me, resuming our passionate kisses. And then he did something new, something different. We had spent a lot of time with my hands down his pants, holding on to him for dear life, but this time he moved his hands under my dress, pushing my virginal white panties out of the way, never stopping the kisses. I moaned, as he rubbed his finger along my now damp sex.

"I love you, Trisha. You are my ray of sunshine," he said, kissing and sucking behind my ear and along my neck.

"Hmm…I love you, too."

Then he slid one of his fingers inside me, and I stopped breathing for a second, gasping a little, feeling a strange soft pain. Oh, shit! Was this the beginning of what Nessie was talking about? Pain and pleasure? Next came the tingling sensation, as Ethan moved his finger in, then out of me slowly, kissing me sweetly along my jawline. I felt the tension in my abdomen. I started to groan, softly saying his name. And then I felt the release. My first orgasm! My body shuddered, "Ugh, Ethan!" I said it a little louder than I probably should have.

"Shhh," Ethan chuckled, taking his finger out of me, placing a soft kiss on my forehead.

He rolled next to me, intertwining our hands, as we both stared at the ceiling.

"This is how it's going to have to be, isn't it? Even worse than before. Only seeing each other at night," Ethan said, his voice pained.

"I'm sorry. It's just for awhile, until all this blows over with Dad."

He pulled me to his chest, wrapping his arm around me. We lay like that until I glanced at the clock, realizing it was three in the morning. Ethan had fallen asleep, and I kissed him on the cheek, as I slipped out the window, walking home.

The next day I got the lecture of a lifetime, though, if my parents had only known what else went on last night, I would have been in even bigger shit. I was "grounded" for a week, which didn't really matter to me, since the only person I wanted to see, was barred, it didn't get worse than that.

Dad's exact words were a little more passionate, "you're not going to see that punk without at least five other adults around. And that little Wahalla shit better keep his damn hands to his damn self." Dad apologized for phasing and tried to ease my fears of the wolves by telling me stories of all the good things they had done over the years. It helped a little but anytime I saw any of the wolves, I felt a shiver run down my spine.

Ethan and I had managed one rendezvous at the beach during the day, completely unnoticed, or so we though. We spent all day, lying in the sand, kissing, and touching. I had my second official orgasm that day. We said our traditional goodbyes, as he walked one way down the beach, and I the other. It had probably been one of the most romantic days we had spent together. It was perfection. I started to feel like everything was going to be okay. Eventually, when Ethan imprinted on me, Daddy would have to accept that we loved each other, and were destined to be together.

Two days after our romantic tryst on the beach, the pack gathered at the Uley's, the wolves in the backyard drinking beer and trading stories. The rumor was that David's change was underway, and he would probably be phasing in the next week or so. Woohoo for him! The wolf-boys stayed close to their dads. I could tell by watching them that Ethan and David were ecstatic, hanging on edge for the change. Mark and Taylor looked terrified, like they wanted no part in any of it. I could feel their pain. I was in the kitchen, again, with the wolf-girls, helping Emily decorate cookies, as she doted on me.

"Oh, shit," we all heard Embry mutter from the backyard.

"What did you just say?" Dad growled, throwing a chair out of his way, charging to Embry.

"Paul, man, I'm sorry. I don't know what I was saying," Embry stuttered.

"TRISHA! Get your ASS out here now!" Dad yelled. What in the hell did this have to do with me?

I skipped out the back door, smiling, walking down the steps, before raising my head to see all the wolves with apologetic looks on their faces, as my Dad's face got redder. I took a deep breath, still not sure exactly what he could want. There was no way he could have found out about my nightly trips to the Wahalla's. We were beyond cautious.

Dad walked towards Ethan, grabbing him by his collar and pulling him towards me. Jared stepped forward, "Paul, watch it. I'm not gonna let you manhandle my son."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, JARED!" Dad growled. Oh, shit. This was bad. Really, really bad. Dad and Jared were best friends, he wouldn't talk to him like that.

No one else said anything, as Dad continued pulling Ethan. This time towards Collin.

"IS IT FUCKIN' TRUE?! IS THAT WHAT HELEN SAW?"

Collin nodded his head yes, knowing Dad would mostly likely call his wife out next, and he didn't want to subject her to the wrath of Paul Wise. What had Helen seen? I was still confused.

Dad pulled Ethan within an inch of his face, "Did YOU have YOUR hands down MY daughter's shorts?"

And then it hit me. The beach. Helen must have seen us on the beach. Any other time he had his hands in my pants, we were in his bedroom. But Helen must have seen the one time we decide to love each other out in the open.

The normally exuberant pack was now at a silent standstill. Ethan looked at me, mouthing "I love you," before turning to my Dad and nodding, ready to face his fate.

Jared continued closing in on Dad and Ethan, as Dad pulled his arm back, ready to punch him.

"Daddy, stop!" I begged, running to him.

He turned to me with rage in his eyes, "Don't you DARE call me Daddy, you little TRAMP! Leave it to my daughter to be the reservation whore!" His words cut through me like a knife, and I think I actually heard several of the wolves gasp. But I had created a distraction, and Jared was able to pull Ethan out of Dad's grip. Dad spun around, his fist making contact with Jared's jaw, as Jared threw Ethan behind him. Jared tackled Dad and a fight ensued. It was impossible for me to see anything. The two men were surrounded by wolves, trying to pull them off of one another, unsuccessfully. They continued rolling around on the ground, fists flying, grunting, and I rushed to Ethan's side.

"ENOUGH!" Sam ordered, slamming his fist on the table, as it buckled underneath the force.

Jared and Dad stopped fighting and turned to Sam. "Emily," Sam said calmly. She came out the backdoor, followed by the rest of the wolf-girls, who all took in the scene in confusion.

"Yes, dear?" Emily said.

"Take Trisha home now. I need to have a little meeting with the rest of the Wises and the Wahallas," Sam said, pointing for Dad and Jared, as well as the imprintees to make their way to the den.

I could only really imagine what Sam could possibly want to say. Sam looked at me and then to Ethan. "You are to have no contact with her until further notice, is that clear?"

Yeah, right, like Sam Uley was going to tell Ethan what to do! That's a joke! Sam's "alpha tone" only worked on pack member, and Ethan wasn't one of those yet. But I saw the look in Ethan's eyes as he said, "Yes, sir," to Sam. Even if he wasn't his Alpha yet, Ethan knew he would be someday, and it would make life a lot easier for everyone if he learned to follow commands now.

Emily took me home, hugging me and smiling before she left. I went to the couch, curled into a ball, and felt numb. Now, not only was I without Ethan, my father thought I was whore. And when Sam finished his discussion, my mom would probably hate me, too. I fell asleep there, until my parents came home. My dad carried me to my room, tucking me into bed. That was the last time he touched me, looked at me, or talked to me for two weeks. I was the blemish in his gene pool, the bad seed. Mom was still loving to me, but I could tell, she was disappointed and ashamed of me, as well. I was under house arrest indefinitely, being allowed only to go to school. I wasn't even allowed to spend time with the wolf-girls. I was alone.

Ethan wasn't at school for the next two weeks, and neither was David. I assumed this meant they were finally getting their dream, their transformation. I wished I could have been able to share that with Ethan. With Ethan gone, I had no friends. Taylor occasionally talked to me, but more out of politeness than concern. I knew he thought I had corrupted his brother. In fact, the only person that really _talked_ to me was Mark. He would tell me little things about David and Ethan and told me he knew it pained Ethan to be away from me. He said that the four of them, Ethan, David, Mark, and Taylor, had been sent to Quil for a "talk" after it was revealed that Ethan couldn't "keep his hands to himself." Mark didn't look at me with the disdain that most of the others did. He would hug me, and listen to me as I sobbed through stories of eavesdropping on conversations Dad had with other pack members about what a disappointment I had turned out to be.

"My Daddy doesn't love me anymore," I cried, sitting with Mark one day after school.

"That's not true. You are the apple of your Dad's eye. He's just a little confused and frustrated right now. He'll come around. Besides, tonight might be your lucky night. We're having a dinner at the house to celebrate David and Ethans's big 'transformation.' Maybe tonight's the night for an imprint," Mark said, giving me a one-armed, side hug.

At the time, I couldn't help but smile.

Damn Mark Uley and his prophetic words!

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NEXT CHAPTER: "You Were Never My Equal"—For all you David lovers! You know who you are!


	6. You Were Never My Equal

**AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer, which is why she has the met the stars of the movie and I haven't. **

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while. She has been very gracious as both the owner of the characters and as my Beta. She rocks! **

**This is a bit of a spin-off from the last chapter ("Genitalia") of yay4shanghai's **_**A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size.**_** If you haven't read it or its accompanying story **_**Enough With the Gravity Moving Already**_**, you need to! **

**I do, however, own the following argument between myself and a fellow teacher:**

*****_**Fourth Grade Teacher: I get what you're saying, the wolf pack is cool, but come on how can you say any of the are HOTTER than Edward.**_

_***Me: Edward is pretty freakin' hot. But, the wolf pack runs around half-naked most of the time. Beat that.**_

_***Fourth Grade Teacher: crickets chirping…You win.**_

**This is my first FanFiction story, so please review and be gentle!**

**AND: yay4shanghai has posted two chapters to her follow up to **_**Enough With This Gravity Moving Already**_**. It's called **_**Once the Earth Settled**_**. Check it out! You won't be disappointed!**

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Chapter 5: "You were never my equal"

After school, I walked home. I grabbed an apple from the kitchen, turning around to see my Dad sitting at the table. He was scratching his head, reading the back of a cake mix box. I looked at him for a second. He knew I was there, and without making eye contact, he mumbled, "Your Mom asked me to bake this cake for the dinner tonight, but I'm trying to figure out why I would put grease in the pan first."

"Do you want me to do it, Dad? I can make the cake," I tried to keep my voice small. These were the only words other than huffs and grunts that he had said to me in weeks, and I wanted to savor every syllable.

He looked at me, his face expressionless. "Do you mind baking it? The boys will be awfully upset if there's no dessert tonight."

"I can do it. No big deal," I smiled at him, watching his eyes soften a little.

He handed me the box, patting the top of my head, and turning to walk out. He stopped, not turning around to look at me. "You know that Ethan will be there tonight? I want you to stay away from him, do you hear me? Things will be different now that he's started phasing. He won't be able to control himself."

"I know, Dad," I said. He continued walking to the den. I knew the real reason for his concern was that if Ethan saw me, since he was now a wolf, there was a real possibility he would imprint on me. I had a feeling that even if Ethan did, Dad would send me to Zimbabwe or China, just to keep him from seeing me.

I baked the cake, finished my homework, and changed clothes. Mom braided my hair, kissing my cheek, and smiling at me.

"You are beautiful, you know that, Trisha?"

I blushed a little. "You have to say that. You're my Mom."

She laughed, "I don't have to say it. I say it because it's the truth." She hugged me, "I know these last few weeks have been hard. You have to know that I love you. That will never, ever change. There is no one else in this world whose Mom I'd rather be."

"And I wouldn't want any other Mom," I sighed, hugging her back, as she kissed my forehead.

"Let's go seduce us some Quileutes," she said, walking us out the door to the car, where Dad stood, holding the cake.

"Took ya long enough," Dad huffed at Mom.

She rolled her eyes at him, "Shut up, Paul."

"Shutting, dear." I giggled in the backseat, knowing the amount of control my Mom had over Dad.

We arrived at the Uley's to be welcomed by the wolf-girls. They each hugged and kissed me, telling me how much they had missed me over the last few weeks. Aunt Helen apologized over and over, telling me that she taught Uncle Collin a lesson after finding out he spilled to Embry and the pack. I was slightly freaked out by the thought of Aunt Helen "teaching him a lesson" after the stories I'd heard about their extracurricular activities, and her preference for rough sex.

Kim hugged me, kissing my cheek, "How was your time in solitary confinement?" I chuckled, hugging her again, "You have no idea how much I've missed you, Kim!"

I knew that of all the people that knew about Ethan's "hand" problem, Kim would be the one least worried or upset by it. That's what I loved about her. She was a rebel, a free spirit, and she knew how in love Ethan and I were.

"Let's get you inside. Amber's about to have a conniption. She's been waiting for you to play Tea Party with her," Kim said, ushering me into the Uley's house.

I looked around, trying to find Ethan. He knew I wasn't supposed to talk to, be near, or touch him, but just being able to see him would have been of some comfort.

"He's not here yet. He will be soon. Just relax," Kim said. I swear that woman could read my mind sometimes.

Amber squealed as she ran to me, followed by the other wolf-kids. Though it had only been two weeks, I had missed them. Being an only child, I saw myself as a big sister to most of the wolf-kids. They were my family. I hugged each of them, before they ran away, begging me to chase them through the Uley's den, listening to the wolf-dads bicker.

I heard footsteps and a loud booming voice coming from the hallway. I didn't recognize the voice at first. It was much deeper and huskier than I heard before. It was actually really sexy. I saw out of the corner of my eye that the sexy voice belonged to David Uley. "Ugh!" I thought. Wow! The transformation had made him bigger, buffer, and his voice deeper. I wondered secretly if the same would be true for Ethan.

I could hear David getting closer to me, with my Dad by his side. From behind me Dad said, "Trisha, why don't you congratulate David. He's a wolf now, and will make a fine Alpha someday."

I rolled my eyes to Amber, as she giggled and I stood up. "Congrats," I said turning around, keeping my head low. "Thanks," he said. (Damn that voice was sexy too belong to such a caveman!) Then I did it. I made the biggest mistake of my life. I looked up. Our eyes locked and we both froze. Almost immediately I saw it, the complete adoration in his face. We couldn't stop staring at each other. The room got eerily quiet, as everyone stopped to look at us.

"Shit!" Dad said proudly, while Jared, standing across the room, said a defeated, "Shit."

I tried to process all of it in my head. What was going on? And, then, I got it. He imprinted…on me. "_Ethan_," I thought. David still couldn't move, but his mouth moved into a pearly white smile, as my Dad patted him on the back.

"_No, it's Ethan. Ethan's my soulmate_," I thought. I could feel the tears prickling my eyes. And, like the world had just been shoved on my shoulders, I fell to the ground, the tears turning into sobs, as I mouthed the word "Why" over and over.

"What happened?" I heard Mom say to Sam, whose was standing near the fireplace, with the same stupid smile on his face that David had.

"My son's just imprinted," Sam said proudly.

"That's great! On who?" Mom asked.

"Your daughter."

It was quiet again until I heard someone screaming Ethan's name. It took me a minute to realize it was me. I was lying on the floor, crying, and screaming.

It must have taken Mom a minute to grasp the reality of the situation, too, before she yelled at Dad to get me out of there. Dad scooped me up, and I held on for dear life, not wanting to look at David again. Ever.

But I did. His eyes ready to overflow with tears. It was an odd sight. Such a large, intimidating body, crying.

Once Dad had me in the car, the silence was completely broken. The pack, the wolf-girls, and wolf-kids all surrounded the car, each with their own interpretation of how things had gone, and assuming they knew where things were going.

I heard Jared run off, sparing with Sam, representing the man whose family I wanted to be a part of, and the man whose family the universe had chosen for me. I knew David wouldn't be able to stay away, but I was surprised when he asked to visit. Mom understood my feelings, politely refusing his request. She was overruled by Dad and his joyous demeanor to marry me off and procreate with the Alpha heir.

Mom assured me in the car that everything would work itself out, but I think she secretly knew my life had just changed dramatically. From now on, nothing would be as simple as it should be.

Again with the damn voices! Would it really be so hard for everyone to just shut the hell up?! Now they're outside my bedroom door, talking about me like I can't hear them. Can't they see I just want to be alone? Well, okay, I don't want to be alone. I want Ethan. I _need_ Ethan.

"Mrs. Wise, please just let me talk to her," David half-said, half-asked. Mrs. Wise? Since when did that Neanderthal learn manners?

"David, honey, I know it's difficult, but you need to give her time. Let her think this out. You know how much she loves Ethan, and you can't expect that to change just because you imprinted." Yeah, that's my mom!

"Rachel, this is beyond ridiculous! Dammit, it's not like David's some stranger. I've never seen an imprint act like that," Sam screamed as I'm sure he pointed toward my closed door. "Most of the girls around here want to be imprinted on and things just go smoothly," Sam said.

"You mean, like how smoothly things went when you imprinted on Emily?" Hell, yeah! Go Mom! Score is Wise-1, Uley-0!

I heard Sam growl and, I have to admit, I giggled. I was still sulking but, if I know my mom, the look she gave Sam when he growled, would have been enough to continue melting the ice caps. I knew Mom felt guilty for bringing that particular subject up. Mom loved Emily, but she loved me more. And, while she and Dad were very much in love, she understood the complications of the imprint. She knew the complications that came with Sam's own imprint.

Mom would fight for me. She may not fight for me and Ethan, but she would always fight for me.

"Was that really necessary?" Sam asked, his tone much calmer, and more like the Sam I was used to.

"Dad, really, it's okay. Mrs. Wise, I just need to know she's okay. I need to talk this out with her," David said, as I could literally feel the tension in the hallway lessening.

"Let him see her. It's not fair to him, keeping him away from his other half." Ugh, damn Dad again!

I rolled over on the bed, turning away from the door, and pulling my knees to my chest. Any minute now the door would open and David would come in to "talk." And this time, there was no one to save me, nowhere to escape to.

I heard the doorknob turn, watching the light from the hallway trickle in, as the door opened and then closed again. I could hear him breathing. I could feel him behind me, begging me to turn and look at him. I couldn't do it, though.

"Trisha?"

I thought for a minute, arguing in my head whether to fake sleep or just get this over with. I decided to go with the latter and whispered, "What do you want, David?"

He didn't say anything at first, my back still to him. "Well, I just wanted to say…umh…I'm gonna say it real fast. And just let me finish before you say anything, okay?"

"Fine," I grunted.

"Will you please just look at me?" I could hear pain in his voice, as he flipped on the lamp next to my bed. I took a deep breath and rolled over. Seeing his face, his eyes red from crying, made me ache, as he allowed himself to slowly smile, only slightly showing his pearly white teeth. He did have a wonderful smile.

I nodded to him to continue, clearing my throat, and sitting up against the pillows of my fluffy bed.

"Look, at first, when it happened, I had like a billion things I wanted to say. My head hurt with all the thoughts. I was more confused than the first time I phased," he said as he took another deep breath. "But, the first thing I thought, after I looked in your eyes, was that I was glad it was you." What the hell?! What did he mean he was glad it was me? This was the same boy that not three years ago told the wolf-boys they shouldn't be my friend because I was a girl and girls were weird. I started to open my mouth to reprimand him, when he put his hand up. "Please just let me finish."

"Okay," I muttered, just wishing he would get it over with.

"Trisha, remember how you've always said that imprinting is finding your equal?" I nodded to him, not realizing that was an opinion I must have expressed to everyone. He continued, starting to pace the floor in front of me. "I've never thought you were my equal." My face grew red, as I locked my jaw, squeezing my fists, ready to punch him in the nose, again. But David wasn't finished. "You were better than me…smarter than me…good-looking, full of energy, and always having to say something about something. You could make a perfect stranger feel like they had known you forever, and stop the tears of any of the wolf-kids." He paused, looking into my eyes, trying to gauge my reaction. "So I got to thinking, what makes me so special, that I get you. Then I got. Maybe imprinting isn't about finding your equal. Maybe it's about finding the person that completes you, makes up for everything you're not."

As furious as I was at him, I was in awe of his speech. I half expected it to be a lot more Tarzan-like. _"You mine. We mates. You give me lots of pups." _It wasn't though. It was truly heartfelt.

He moved to sit next to me on the bed, a bold move, I must say, him knowing I had a hell of right-hook. I think deep inside, though, he knew I wouldn't hurt him.

"I know this isn't what you wanted." He put his head down, "I know I'm not who you wanted. And I don't like that the imprinting is going to cost me my best friend, my pack brother. I could never hurt Ethan."

In some involuntary reaction, my hand went to his back, patting him lightly, consoling him like I would a little child. He turned to me and grinned. I jerked my hand away.

"I'm really, really sorry for what this is going to do to you. And I'm sorry for what this is going to do to Ethan. But I will not apologize for the imprint," he turned to me, grabbing my face in his hands, so I was looking directly in his eyes. "I want you. I will be patient, but you have to know that in the end, you will be mine."

Then he left. Just like that. Leaving me without giving me a chance to refute what he said. I didn't get to tell him he could wait forever, but I would NEVER be his.

I needed to talk to someone. Someone who would be impartial, who hadn't seen it. And as much as I knew Nessie was all about the imprint, I also knew she would listen to everything I had to say, being the strong independent female she was. I picked up the phone next to my bed and quickly dialed. It was late, but I was desperate.

"What?!" The deep voice said, sounding a little winded.

"Uncle Jake?" What the hell could they have been doing? He sounded like he had been running a freakin' marathon.

"Why would you answer the phone? I was almost there!" I heard Nessie snap in the background. Great, they were having sex and I interrupted. Now, not only do I have to deal with the world's most complicated imprint, I also had to live with the mental image of my favorite Aunt and Uncle in full fuck mode.

"Sorry, babe, it's Trisha."

"Oh, is everything okay?" she said, her pissed off voice turning softer, more concerned.

"No, tell her everything is not okay!" I yelled into the phone, the tears beginning again.

"What happened?" Uncle Jake asked, very matter-of-factly.

"I was imprinted on tonight," I said softly, moving away from the loud tones I had been using.

"Oh, no," he sighed. "By who?"

"David Uley," I said. I was confused. Why did he have to ask? Wouldn't he have automatically assumed it would be Ethan? He knew we were a couple and that Ethan had started phasing.

"David Uley? Damn, that's major," he said, pausing for a minute. "You're wondering why I knew it wasn't Ethan, aren't you?"

"Yes, the thought did cross my mind."

"Sweetie, the one you want to imprint on or the one you want to imprint on you is very rarely the one chosen for you," he said very softly, making me wish he were here to wrap me up in his big, warm arms.

"Why didn't anyone ever tell me that? I've walked around for years thinking it would be the person I loved most, the person I already saw as my soulmate!" I argued, my tears now rolling down my face.

"Because, when it comes to imprinting, nothing is ever certain. It could have just as easily been Ethan, but the universe had other plans, things always work out though. Take me and Nessie for instance."

"What do you mean, you and Nessie?" Please, dear God, don't let this be something else about sex!

"You know Ness's mom, Bella, right?"

"Yeah," I wondered where this could possibly be going.

"Well, back in the day," he chuckled, trying to sound like he was anything other than the young man he was, "I kinda, sorta had a thing for Bella."

"Ew! Gross!" I said, hearing Ness laugh in the background.

"She was my best friend. Much like Ethan is your's. I needed her and she needed me. I thought after the change that maybe she would be my imprint. I felt it deep down. But I saw her… and nothing. I was more confused than ever. Then, she and Edward got married and had Ness. The moment I set eyes on her, I imprinted and she became my world," he said, letting me hear his smile on the other end of the phone, and hearing Nessie sigh.

"Weren't you the slightest bit pissed at, well, fate?" I asked.

"Not when I saw her. Not when I had my Nessie. You see, the reason why I loved Bella so much, why I needed her, was because Nessie was always a part of her. Am I helping you at all, here, Trisha-bug?"

"Uh, no. I can't see what in the world this has to do with me and my current imprint problem. Uncle Jake, I love Ethan. I want to be with him forever and I don't understand why I can't still have him."

"I loved Bella, but the universe knew there was someone greater for me to love. The love I had for Bella pales in comparison to the love I have for my imprint," he spoke softly, as I hear a kissing noise. I was praying he was kissing her cheek. "We're going to let you go now. We have some business to attend to."

The phone clicked.

Was he trying to tell me that David was greater than Ethan? There was no way that could ever be true. Ethan was a nature-lover, with pride in his heritage, and a love for his family. Other than our conversation tonight, I couldn't think of the last intelligent thing I had heard David say. How could the universe think David greater than Ethan?

Mom knocked on my door, and opened it slightly. I closed my eyes tight, pretending to be asleep.

"I guess she must have tuckered out and fell asleep," Mom said.

"We'll talk to her tomorrow," Dad said.

"You're really happy about this, aren't you?"

"Yeah, she'll be good for David, and he for her. They both have a lot to learn from each other."

"We shall see," Mom said closing the door softly, then I heard her giggle and Dad growl. That always meant someone was getting lucky.

Would anyone else like to have sex where I can hear? I had a life altering occurrence tonight, and all these people can think about is fucking?

My thoughts were interrupted by a single wolf's howl, a pain filled, devastated howl. Ethan knew.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "I Hate Fate"


	7. I Hate Fate

**AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer, which is why she has the met the stars of the movie and I haven't. **

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while. She continues to rock and I send her pieces of cheesecake, electronically!**

**I do, however, own the following statement made by myself, and sure to be included in the story somewhere. If you don't get it, you must be a guy.**

_***Me: Aunt Flo is here for her monthly visit and she is being one bitch of a houseguest!**_

**This is my first FanFiction story, so please review and be gentle!**

**If you haven't already check out the sequel to **_**Enough With This Gravity Moving Already**_** by yay4shanghai . It's called **_**Once the Earth Settled**_**. Check it out! You won't be disappointed!**

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Chapter 6: "I Hate Fate"

Ethan's POV

So much can happen in two weeks. Basically, for me, within a period of two weeks, I was almost murdered by my soulmate's extremely pissed off father, was ordered to stay away from her until "further notice," and then to top it off I morphed into a giant wolf. Things could only get better, right?

I missed her so much that my heart literally ached, my Trisha, my ray of sunshine, who without, my world was dark and dreary. I needed to see her face, to touch her body. I needed her warmth and love. She has always been the only one that accepted me for everything I am, never judging me, even when I took a least traveled path to vegetarianism (and not the type the Cullens follow), pretty well bucking all the pack's and their families lust for red meat.

Last year, when it came time for me to have to dissect a frog in science class, Ray made a t-shirt that said, "No Disrespect, But It's Wrong to Dissect." She wore it for a week, a constant reminder to the principal of his stupidity, after suspending me. We spent many a Saturday together at the clinic on the reservation, reading stories to the younger Quileutes, as they waited for immunizations and check-ups. Ray was my first kiss, the first girl to sleep with me (literally sleep, at one our many sleepover campouts as kids), the first girl and only girl to star in my wet dreams, and the first girl and only girl whose pants I put my hands down.

We were part of each other's families. Ray's dad and my Dad were best friends. Our moms were almost like sisters. She treated my siblings like they were her own. Things had changed, though, over the years. Instead of just being friends, we fell in love. Sure, we're young, but when you know, you know. Things became strained when her dad, who I was already scared shitless of, caught us making out in her Uncle's garage. That was the first time I have ever truly feared for my life. At the same time, I feared more for my Ray. I had seen the wolves before, watched most of them phase, yearning to be just like them. I had never really thought about what Ray thought of them. I guess it's different when you don't have a choice to see it. In our case, at that time, Paul's phasing was an impulse, and she wasn't prepared. I knew it horrified her, and I tried to make sure she would never look at me with terror in her eyes when I phased.

We had resolved to only see each other at night. She crept into my room, without anyone knowing. We spent hours holding each other, loving each other, knowing we are it for one another forever. We went from sweet, innocent kisses, to my fingers inside her. I swear, I don't care how old we are, if she had wanted it, I would have fucked her like the dog I am.

Now we were separated by an overprotective father and hardass Alpha, after they found out we were a little more involved with each other, than they had previously assumed. It was torture!

Not two days after Paul beat the shit out of my dad, while trying to kill me, myself, my little brother Taylor, and the Uley twins were sent to Quil, who had been brought out to give us a more in-depth lecture on the importance of respecting women, i.e. not putting your hands down their pants. Quil had been a real "Debby Downer" lately, with his Claire-bear off gallivanting across Europe, leaving him in La Push, but taking his balls with her. And Dad and Sam thought it might be good for Quil to hang out with the younger wolves or soon-to-be-wolves, not to mention that they're too big of pussies to actually talk to us about sex themselves. (It seemed ironic that they couldn't talk about sex, since we wolf-boys had heard both Mom and Dad, as well as Sam and Emily, and pretty much any of the wolf-couples, going at it at some point.) The talk turned into a pretty comedic event, watching Mark make Quil blush every time he used of the word "genitalia."

Quil's speech made me miss Trisha even more (though I have to admit I got a few good pointers for the future, including the most comfortable positions for a giant wolf making love to a petite china doll). But it also made me worry about my wolf situation. I was almost 15, and most of the other wolves before me, had already done so by the time they were my age. I was going to be crushed if I didn't change, and soon. I knew it had to be coming. I would swear I could feel it in my bones.

It did happen though, during my banishment from Ray. Mom noticed my temperature change, and my growth spurt which made me almost equal in height to my Dad. I also saw the same things happening to David, and I was overjoyed that we would get to be wolves together.

Anger is what set it off, my first phase. Sitting in the Uley's backyard, listening to several of the newer wolves, who had come down from Seattle for a visit, joke about Trisha.

"So, no more Trisha for you, huh?" Krys asked, "So does that mean, she's like available?"

"Don't even think about it, dumbass," I said through gritted teeth.

"Why? Paul's not gonna let you get within two miles of her. And, since I already know she won't object to a little finger action," Krys started before I cut him off.

"Don't ever talk about my Ray that way, do you hear me?!" My fists balled up next to me as I stood up, David moving next to me.

"Who the fuck is Ray?" Krys asked.

No one other than Trisha and I really knew about my name for her. It was something really intimate that just we shared and now I had just ruined it.

"None of your business, cheese dick." Did I really just call him that?

"Okay, so I'm gonna go in and butter up Paul, see if I can take Trisha down to the beach. I know she likes that," he chuckled.

And then as I flew at him, my body exploded into a giant ball of fur. Krys phased before I could get to him, making the brief fight a little uneven, seeing as how, in my mind I was still dealing with my furplosion.

"What the hell?" Sam said, running out the backdoor toward us.

"Ethan just phased," Taylor said, unenthusiastically.

"No shit," Dad said as he phased.

I could hear Krys in his wolf form, stopping the taunting to help me calm down a bit.

"_Dude, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you so mad," Krys thought._

I was still majorly confused and elated. This was awesome and creepy at the same time.

"_Son, you okay?" Dad thought, nuzzling me on the shoulder._

"_Umh, I think so._" _I thought._

"_Who's the new wolf?" I heard someone think. _It was Paul. No one else around us was in wolf-form, so he had to have been out patrolling somewhere.

"_It's Ethan, Paul." Dad thought._

"_FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!" Paul responded._

"_Chill out," I thought._

I couldn't help but laugh, knowing my mere wolfy existence was threatening to the big muscled, no-nonsense Paul.

And thinking about Paul, made me think about Trisha, which then made me think of our day at the beach, our hands down each others pants, her rubbing me while my fingers moved in and out of her, lips locked with love and lust, both of us moaning, loudly. Awkward…

"_I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL HIM!" Paul thought, again._

"_Not right now, you're not. Paul, why don't you phase back?" _Sam, thank heavens! _"It would be helpful if you didn't think about that right now, Ethan. How you doing?"_

"_Not bad. My body kinda hurts a little. Is that normal?"_

"_For the first few times, yeah. You're body is adjusting. It'll be okay in a few days."_

"_How long will I stay like this?"_

"_Until you can phase back. Why don't you try?" Sam thought._

"_And how exactly do I do that?"_

"_Try to think of something that calms you down."_

I thought of Trisha. Nothing in particular, not like the images I had sent Paul earlier. Just her. Her smile and her laugh. I felt my body shudder a little, and then I lie naked in the Uley's backyard, surrounded by Dad and Sam in their wolf forms, as David handed me some shorts to put on.

Now, I was in pain. Everything ached. My head, my muscles, my toes even.

"Ugh, Sam, is it supposed to hurt this bad," I said, as actual tears started form in my eyes.

Sam and Dad phased back.

"It'll go away eventually. You just need time to get used to it. Jared, if it's okay, I think it would be best to keep Ethan here for a while. So we can guide him through this as easily as possible," Sam said, as Dad nodded.

The first week at the Uleys was torturous. I had no control over when I would phase. Once I was in their kitchen, fixing cereal, when I noticed they were out of milk. I was only a little pissed, and, had I still been human, I would have just found something else to eat. Not anymore. Instead I did the normal furplode action, only to be ushered out of the house by an angry Emily.

It got easier the more I had time to think about something before I got angry. I couldn't help but wonder what it had been like for Paul during his first few weeks as a wolf, knowing he has a short-temper. I imagined he probably just stayed in wolf form for days at a time. I would have loved to have asked him, but he refused to phase until I could control myself, fearing anymore sexual images of his daughter. Even as a human, Paul wouldn't come near me and barred his family from visiting the Uleys. Anytime the wolf-girls got together, they met at the Wise house or at our house.

My transformation was soon met with David's. We suffered through the pain together, but were ecstatic to finally be wolves! It didn't take David as long to control himself as me, which was ironic, because David was anything but the poster child of self-control.

After we were both fairly comfortable with our new lives, Sam and Emily planned a dinner to celebrate, mainly in David's honor, but I was included, as well. It was the first time I had been allowed to go home and only to change clothes. The whole run there I thought of Trisha. I would finally get to see her! After two weeks of isolation from the one person I loved more than anything, I would finally see her face, smell her hair, hold her close to me. (When no one was around, of course.) I had to rummage through Dad's wardrobe to find something suitable to wear. All my clothes were now too small, something I knew Mom would not be too pleased about.

I showered, spent extra time on my hair, dressed, and looked pretty damn good, if I do say so. Then I started the walk to the Uleys. Midway there I got a text message from Taylor.

_Bro, where r u? Get here fast!_

I was in the process of texting him back, when I saw a wolf coming towards me. I saw his familiar eyes and knew it was Dad.

"Hey, Dad. Shouldn't you be at the party?" I asked, watching him phase back and pull his shorts on.

"We're not going to the party," he said turning me around to walk back towards the house.

"Why? Is Trisha there? Did you see her? How did she look?" I was giddy as a freakin' schoolgirl.

"Please, son, just wait until we get to the house."

This was not normal. Dad was being too cryptic and I could tell something was wrong.

"What is it, Dad? What's going on that you're not telling me?"

He stopped and took a deep breath. "David imprinted."

"Wow! That was fast! Before me, huh? I kinda always thought Trisha and I would be first," I chuckled. "So, who's the lucky gal?"

Dad turned his eyes to the ground and put his hands on my shoulders.

"I want you to take a few deep breaths, okay? Just think before you react," he said.

Shit! This had to be something really bad. Dad was never so serious. I thought for a second and the only logical conclusion I could come up with was that David must have imprinted on my little sister, Amber.

"It's Amber, isn't it?" I said, shaking my head and starting to walk off. "That's not so bad. Why did you think I'd be mad about that?"

"Ethan, it's not Amber. It's T-T-Trisha," he stuttered.

I stopped. I felt my whole body overflow with anger and resentment. No! My beautiful Ray of sunshine was destined for someone else? No! My body trembled, as I balled my fists, shaking, and then sobbing, before I phased. I took off running to the Uley's house. Embry was in wolf-form in the front yard, acting as a guard dog.

"_Stop, Ethan. I can't let you go near the house," Embry thought._

"_Where the fuck is he? Where's David?" I thought._

"_That's none of your business. Now you need to turn around and go home."_

"_Fuck, no, I'm not going home! WHERE IS THAT BACKSTABBING SON-OF-A-BITCH?" _

"_Ethan, please," Dad came from behind me in wolf-form._

"_I'm gonna kill him! He was supposed to be my best friend! Trisha is mine! I love her, he doesn't even like her!" _

I never knew wolves could cry, but I was. I was sobbing. I turned my head to the sky and howled, pushing all my hurt out into the open.

"_Son, we have to go," Dad moved in front of me._

"_No! I'm not leaving until I rip his fucking throat out!"_

"_Ethan, you have to let her go. She's not your's anymore."_

Wait. Did my Dad just side with that no-good-asshole who not two hours ago was my best friend, my pack brother but was now my arch nemesis?

"_What the fuck did you just say?"_

"_I know it's hard, but imprinting is strong, son. He won't be able to keep away from her and eventually, she'll have to give in."_

"_No! Trisha won't! I know her! I know everything about her! She would never EVER love David Uley! She hates him, despises him even. She loves me! She won't EVER want him!"_

"_I'm sorry, Ethan, but she will. They always do."_

I couldn't stop the tears and the sobs. I should have been embarrassed bawling like a baby around my Dad and Embry, but the pain in my heart wouldn't go away. Trisha and I were supposed to be together. We were supposed to get married and have a family. We were supposed grow old together and spend hours rocking on our front porch while our grandchildren played in the front yard. Why would fate do this to me?

"_Son, please just let her go."_

"_Never." I thought. "How could you not be on my side, Dad?"_

"_It's not that I'm not on your side, I just know how imprinting works. Think back on every wolf you've ever seen that imprinted. No matter how hard one of them might fight it, they always got their imprint, didn't they?"_

I saw the images in his head, as he went through all of the wolves: Sam and Emily, Paul and Rachel, Helen and Collin, Nessie and Jake, and he and Mom. He was right. They were all happily together. But I refused to believe that it always had to be that way.

My anger was at its breaking point, and even in wolf-form himself, my Dad backed off.

"_There's one more thing you haven't thought about, Ethan." Embry thought, walking towards me. _

"_And what the hell is that?"_

"_You can't steal your pack brother's imprint. It's against everything that we wolves stand for, and you know what will happen if you try." _

I knew what Embry meant. Coveting a pack brother's imprint meant a fight to the death. I thought about fighting David and Dad must have seen it.

"_You won't win, son. Other than Jake and Paul, I don't think anyone could beat David Uley You would die." _Dad's thoughts were quiet and he looked me in the eyes. _"Are you really willing to die for this?"_

"_With all my heart," I thought, walking off before turning around. "I will not come home until you are on my side. I don't know how but Trisha and I will fight this imprint." _

And then I ran, I ran to the Wise house, knowing I wouldn't go home again, ever. My own father had betrayed me.

I felt Seth phase as I got closer.

"_You need a place to stay?" Seth thought._

"_Are you going to give me shit about David?" I asked._

"_I'll try not to," Seth chuckled._

Seth and myself were two of the few unimprinted wolves, but staying with him meant staying with Brady and Quil, two of the biggest lovesick mutts on the reservation. I thought about it and decided time with Seth might help me sort through everything thrown my way.

"_I need to make a stop, Seth, and then I'll be right over," I thought._

"_Be careful. Make sure David's not there before you go."_

Seth knew exactly where I was going. I had to see her, even if only through her window while she slept.

"David Uley! That damn well better not be you!" She whispered harshly.

I phased back, standing in front of her completely naked.

She stared at me for a second, as her eyes filled with tears.

"Ethan? Is that you? Are you really here?" She whispered, gasping for air.

I ran to her window, pulled myself inside, and crushed her body to mine. I could hear her breathing change and become more ragged.

"_Shit, I'm crushing her to death." I thought._

"I'm sorry. I forgot my strength," I said pulling away.

Trisha looked at me, without saying a word, and pushed me to her bed, forcing her lips of mine, before crawling on top of me and straddling my hips. I knew this was very against the rules. This could constitute the fight to the death Embry warned me about. But I didn't care. I knew I wouldn't be able to be with her like this for awhile and I was taking full advantage of it.

She crashed her lips onto mine. I licked her lips before slowly inching my tongue into her mouth, exploring and massaging her tongue. She grinded her hips on me and I could tell she felt how hard I was through the cotton of her pajamas by the look of lust on her face. She slid down my body, taking my now at full attention member into her tiny hands. She smiled at me, before kissing its head, and moving her hands up and down. I jerked a bit while I whispered her name, letting loose, as she reached for a Kleenex to wipe away the sticky white substance on her hands.

She laid down next to me, snuggling close.

"You didn't have to do that," I chuckled. "I love you even without hand jobs and rough kisses."

I was trying to lighten the mood a little but it didn't work.

"This is really bad, isn't it?" Trisha said.

"Yeah," I sighed. "And me being here, right now, is not a good idea." I looked down at her and kissed her forehead. "I'm going to stay with Seth for awhile."

"How will I see you?" She said, the tears starting to form again.

I knew it was very unlikely we would be able to see each other that much. When we were sneaking around, we always had my bedroom window to keep us together. Now, that wasn't an option. Plus, I didn't want to get Seth and Quil in anymore trouble than absolutely necessary.

"It's going to be difficult for awhile. We probably won't see each other that much." I kissed her forehead again.

She was crying and whimpering, "I don't want him, Ethan. I want you."

"I know, Ray, and I only ever want you. We just have to be patient, okay?" I had to look away from her face. I was literally in physical pain seeing her so upset.

"How long before I'll see you again?" She whispered, kissing my collarbone. I was still laying on her bed, still completely naked, and it felt entirely normal.

"I don't know. I'll leave you notes, okay? Under your pillow, so don't lock the window," I laughed a little.

She sat up on her elbows and gazed at me with her beautiful doe eyes. She ran her fingers over my face, memorizing every feature, knowing that we would be separated for too long. I did the same to her, before kissing each of her fingertips, and scooting off the bed. I moved to the window, before turning back to see her on the bed.

"I love you so much, I already miss you," I said, pulling my leg over the windowsill. "I will promise I will fight for you."

I heard her say, "I love you, too, and I will fight for you," before I phased.

I could hear her faint whimpers as I got farther away and closer to Seth's. He stood at the door waiting for me and threw a pair of sweats at me, as I phased back.

"How is she doing?" Seth asked, taking a swig of the beer in his hand.

I shook my head, "Not good. Not good at all."

He took another swig and asked, "How are you doing?"

I plopped down on the couch and glared at him, "Are you really asking me that?"

"Well, I was, until you got all pissy with me."

I took a deep breath and began my rant. "Basically, it boils down to this: I hate fate. My whole life I've walked around thinking about how much I wanted to be a wolf and protect people. I've thought about how the only person I ever wanted to love would be Trisha, and I just assumed that fate would cut me some slack and give that to me. Apparently, not, as I am now stuck in this situation with said girl being imprinted on by my former best friend."

"Former best friend?" Seth asked.

"Yes, former best friend. As far as I am concerned, David Uley can go take a long walk off a short pier," I said, walking to the kitchen to find something to eat. I settled on three Granny Smith apples, sweet in the beginning and then tart as hell, kind of like fate.

"You can crash here on the couch. I'm headed to get some rest. Do you need anything before I go?"

"I'm good, man. Just want to get this day over with," I said as I fluffed the pillow on the couch.

This was my existence for a few weeks. I snuck over to the Wise house during the day, leaving little notes for Trisha under her pillow. I caught glimpses of her occasionally, especially after school, when I would wait just off in the woods to see her run to her room to find her note for the day. I was actually quite surprised that Paul never caught me. I'm sure he had to have smelled me.

The worst part of was David. The other wolves made sure we were never phased at the same time. He followed her around like a lost puppy dog, while she never even acknowledged his existence. I was proud of my girl for that.

Living with Seth, Quil, and Brady was really interesting. Seth was really the only one I ever saw, but he took care of me like the big brother I never had. I made it my personal mission to find out everything about imprinting (if it could be broken, can two people imprint on the same person, etc.), and Seth was always patient enough to answer any of my questions.

I had determined that Trisha and I could break this imprint. Our love was so much stronger than any mystical force. If any people could do it, it would be us.

I walked around with confidence and determination.

That is until Seth told me a tale to completely burst my bubble of hope.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Saturday Nights Alright For Fighting"


	8. Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting

**AN: I do not own the vampires or the wolf pack (though, I wish I did). Sadly, they belong to Stephanie Meyer.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**I also don't own the title to this chapter, as it belongs to an old Elton John song, that I don't even have on my iPod.**

**I do, however, own the following statement made by my brother on Easter, as he runs a red light, yelling at the car next to us with a Kansas License Plate (sorry, if you're from Kansas): **

_***My Brother: "Cuz that's how we fucking roll in the OKC, bitch!" (OKC=Oklahoma City)**_

**Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! You are awesome! It literally makes my day to see reviews!**

**Don't forget to show some love to yay4shanghai, as well as another of my faves KupKakes09!**

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Chapter 7: "Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting"

ETHAN'S POV

Seth's history lessons were generally interesting, and I learned more from him than from anything Sam ever told us. I guess Seth had been saving one particular story.

"Hey, Ethan! How was your day? How's Trisha?" He asked, fixing a big bowl of macaroni and cheese and smiling up at me, knowing I spent my days keeping an eye on her from a distance.

"My day was as miserable as Trisha is. She never smiles anymore, and her eyes are always red. Damn, David Uley! Why won't he just leave her the hell alone," I sighed.

He took a big bite before patting the seat next to him on the couch. "He can't, man. Hey, you up for another story?"

I smiled, moving to sit. "Always."

"I don't know if you're going to like this one, Ethan. But I guess you need to hear it. So before you get pissed off and phase, just think, okay?" Seth said, putting the bowl on the coffee table and turning more towards me. He raised his eyebrows, waiting for me to respond.

"Fine," I grumbled.

Seth cleared his throat. "So, you know that Emily is my cousin, right?"

I nodded to him.

"Before Sam was married to Emily, he and Leah were together. I mean, _together_ together. Absolutely in love with one another. We all thought they would get married, have the white picket fence, two kids and a dog, kinda thing," Seth said, shaking his head a little.

"What happened? I mean, sure Leah's a bitch sometimes, but," he cut me off before I could finish.

"Don't talk about my sister that way," he said, putting his head down. His eyes got sad as he looked up at me. "You know, she wasn't always like that, you know? Cold. She used to be happy and fun, we always had so much fun together. But then Sam broke her. He broke everything about her, her heart, her happiness, her will to live."

"He imprinted," I said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah. While he was still with Leah. And on our cousin, no less. Leah was devastated."

"But why, if Sam loved Leah, did he not fight for her?" I asked half-heartedly, knowing the answer.

"He couldn't. The imprint was too strong. He was so pulled to Emily that nothing he had with Leah mattered anymore. So Emily got Sam and the family that everyone assumed would belong to Leah."

I thought for a minute about Trisha, wondering if Seth's story held true if the imprintee was the one in love and not the other way around. Was I Leah in the story? Was I the one going to become a bitch while David and Trisha lived happily-ever-after with little mutts running about their house? Fuck! I was more confused than ever.

"So, what you're telling me, is that no matter what I do, no matter what Trisha does, she's going to end up with him?" I said, defeat clear in my voice.

Seth shook his head, "I don't know. What I do know is that you need to let her make that decision for herself. It can't be easy for David, either. He lost his best friend and…"

"I don't want to hear about David Uley! What he feels is the least of my concerns right now," I snapped at Seth.

Seth patted me on the back and returned to his macaroni and cheese and flipped on the TV.

"Gotta love baseball, right?" He smiled.

Seth was a great friend, but hanging around with him really made me miss my family.

"You should go see them, let them know you're okay." I swear Seth must have some mind reading ability! "I know they miss you. Your mom especially."

I decided to take a shower and then head home, at least for dinner, maybe. I ran, with shorts tied to my leg, ignoring the voices in my head from the rest of the pack. I stayed in the woods outside of the house for minute, phasing back, and getting dressed. I watched as Taylor and Mark walked out of the house and headed towards the beach. Taylor and Mark? Since when did they become friends? I guess it only made sense. Both of their big brothers were off pining for the same girl, while they were only left with each other. I was happy to see Taylor have someone to talk to, and I knew it wouldn't be too long before both of them started phasing too.

I walked slowly to the house, hearing voices coming from the kitchen.

"Kim, I don't understand why I can't have him! I just want Ethan, I only want him!" I knew that voice. It was Trisha. She was sitting at the kitchen table with Mom, weeping into her soda.

Mom sat across from her, a box of tissues between them, holding Trisha's hand.

"Has David been following you around?" Mom asked.

Trisha nodded. "I told him to stop. I told him to leave me alone."

"He can't, Trisha. No matter how much you want him to—or even if he wanted to, he can't," Mom whispered.

Trisha's tears were worse now. She kept her head down. "For the first time in my life, I am ashamed of all this wolf business." She looked at Mom, practically screaming, "I wish this never existed! I wish we could all just be normal, no pack, no wolves, no imprints!"

"Without the imprint, you wouldn't be here," Mom said.

"Well, maybe that wouldn't be so bad," Trisha sighed.

I could see Mom's eyes get a little angry. "Trisha Wise, don't you ever fucking say that again! Do you hear me?! I know this is hard. You think I don't miss my son? You think I don't wish everything could go back the way it was? I know you love him and I know he loves you. But you never having existed would not solve this problem."

Trisha's tears got worse as she looked my Mom in the eyes and said with determination, "Then what will? Tell me and I will do it! I'm killing everyone around me! My Dad's pissed at me because I won't just give in to the imprint, my Mom's pissed at Dad because he won't leave me alone about it, I haven't seen Ethan in weeks, and there's a damn wolf following me around everywhere I go! So tell me what the hell I have to do to solve this freakin' problem!"

Mom got out of her chair and moved over to Trisha, wrapping her in a hug, as Trisha continued to sob into her chest. "I know you love my son. I know this is hard for everyone, especially you. Just don't ever say you wish you didn't exist." Mom put her finger under Trisha's chin, making her look her in the eyes. "You are too special and mean too much to my family to not be here. Do you hear me?"

Trisha nodded, hugging Mom back.

I saw a car pull into the driveway, and watched as Paul got out. He sniffed the air and snarled a little, as he made his way to the front door, banging on it.

"For fucks sake, Paul, are you trying to break down the door?" Mom said.

"Is he here? Is Ethan here?" Paul said, looking over Mom's shoulder into the house.

"I wish," I heard Trisha say as she hugged Mom. "I love you, Kim. Thanks for listening."

She followed Paul to their car, throwing herself in, and buckling her seatbelt, as Paul followed her mumbling about my scent.

I waited another few minutes before making my way into the house.

"Mom!" I yelled, as I walked into the kitchen.

She had her back turned, digging through the freezer, before pulling out a gallon of Cookies-n-Cream ice cream.

"Rough day?" I asked, slightly laughing.

"You have no idea," she said, pulling two spoons out, handing me one, and then digging into the ice cream.

She smiled at me, placing her hand on my cheek. "Oh, special guy, you have no idea how much I've missed you. Are you here to stay?"

I shook my head no, taking a bite of ice cream. "Just came to let you know I was still alive."

Mom threw the spoon into the ice cream. "Do you know how hard this is on all of us? Did you see Trisha? Fuck, look at Taylor, he misses you so much, he won't say it but look his new best friend is your girlfriend's imprint's brother! This whole thing is just too dysfunctional!"

I had to kind of laugh at that statement. If it wasn't so screwed up, if it was happening to someone else, it would have been funny.

"I know, Mom. I just can't be here with all of this surrounding me," I said, kissing her cheek.

"You're crushing her, Ethan. She hasn't seen you in too long. She feels rejected, you know that?"

Before I could say anything, Dad walked in and smiled at me. "Hi, son!"

"Fuck you," I said, as I walked upstairs to pack some clothes. I was still a little angry at Dad for our conversation the night of the imprint fiasco. No one followed me up the stairs. I could hear Dad blubbering to Mom. He missed me and I missed him, but I am a man in love and trying to prove a point.

I could hear Mom, too. "What the fuck am I supposed to do?" It seems like everyone was saying that lately. "Jared, he's my son. I love him and I want him to be happy."

"But…" Dad said.

"I know how imprinting works. Even if she could stay away from David, David could never stay away from her. And what kind of life would that be for them?"

Mom was right. Seth was right. Hell, Dad had been right from the beginning. I would have to pull myself away from Trisha. I wouldn't contact her anymore. I would let her make her decision.

It was a good plan and it worked, for awhile.

I spent weeks hanging out with Seth, going to visit Sue and Charlie, and doing anything I could to keep my mind off of the most important thing in the world to me, my Ray. I'd heard through the grapevine (Billy told Sue who told Charlie who told me) that Trisha was like a zombie nowadays. Withdrawing herself farther and farther from her family. I hated that I was doing that to her, but I knew eventually, no matter our strength, she would give into the imprint, so I was just pushing it along a little faster.

I needed to get back to my roots. I needed some time in the woods, just me and the trees. I decided to have a little campout. I pitched a tent not far from my family's home and sat. That's really about all I did, sat and thought, trying to decide what my next move would be. Eventually, after three days of sitting, thinking, and meditating, I responded to myself with, "I got nothing." I started packing up when I heard the footsteps. Three different people. I knew their scents. Taylor and the Uley boys. They weren't together. Taylor was in front. The Uleys weren't far behind him. (I had also heard through the grapevine that Mark had started phasing, and that he and Taylor were no longer best friends, as the result of a bet Taylor and I had made regarding Mark's sexual preference.)

"Ethan?" Taylor said, walking towards me, smiling as he got closer.

"Yeah, little bro. It's me," I met him, smiling, and hugging him.

"I've missed you," Taylor said.

"Ditto, bro, ditto." I looked him over, taking in his new appearance. He was bigger, stronger looking, with a bit of a swagger to his step. "Have you gone wolf?"

He nodded. I knew he didn't want to. When David and I would fantasize about the day we would phase, Mark and Taylor wanted no part of it. The more I thought, the more I realized that I had to have been the worst big brother in the world since the imprint. My own brother had started phasing and I had no idea. I hadn't been there for him, to help him through it.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"Hey, it's not your fault. Like you said, it's in our blood, right?" Taylor was so logical about everything. He laughed and then turned to me. "You know you owe me some money?"

I laughed back, "Yeah, I heard. So, Mark's gay? I was so sure he wasn't."

Taylor stopped laughing. "He won't talk to me now. He found out about the bet."

I stopped laughing, too, looking at him a little confused. "You guys had become pretty close, huh?"

"Yeah—wait, not like that, Ethan!"

"I didn't mean like that. I'm grateful to Mark. He's been the brother to you that I couldn't be."

"Yeah, well he hates me now, so it doesn't matter." Taylor said, kicking a rock.

"Yes it does. He was your friend. In case you've forgotten, I know what it's like to lose a best friend," I moved to stand closer to him.

"It's all a mess, isn't it?" Taylor asked.

"Pretty much," I said.

He furrowed his eyes and started sniffing. "You smell that?"

I nodded, "It's the Uleys. We better get out of here."

Taylor grabbed my bag, throwing it over his shoulder, as we both turned to walk away, instead we walked right into the David and Mark. No one said anything for a minute. We just stared. David moved first.

"Ethan, dude, where you been? I've missed you."

He was getting closer to me, too close, and I started to feel threatened. I growled warning him to stay back. But he didn't heed the warning and continued moving towards me. My body started the familiar trembling as I closed the space between us. Seeing him stand there with no clue how much I truly hated him, how I had no intention of ever letting him be with my Trisha, set me off. The shaking and trembling ceased as I jumped at David in full wolf form. He ducked out of the way, phasing immediately.

"_So that's how you want to play. All friendly like nothing happened," I thought._

"_Dammit, would you just chill?" David thought._

Instead of "chilling" I bombarded him with images of every sexual act Trisha and I had engaged in. I showed him the kissing, the groping, the finger incidents, and finally the handjob, making sure he knew that one occurred on the night of the imprint.

I nipped at him, as we rolled in the dirt, neither one really getting a foothold on any type of victory.

"_You see David Uley! There is NO WAY IN HELL that she will EVER love you! Even on the night you imprinted on her, Trisha chose me to love," I thought, continuing to replay the images._

I could tell my tactic was working. I had the upper-hand, pinning him to the ground. Until, Mark, who was now bigger than David, especially in wolf-form, charged at me, throwing me off David, as I felt my shoulder crack.

Mark pinned me easily, as a growled and yelped in pain.

"_Mark, this is not your fight! Back off!" I thought._

"_My brother's fight is my fight!" Mark said._ I knew he probably wanted to hide it, but I could see the turmoil in his mind. Images of him and Taylor talking, the moment he told Taylor he was gay. I could feel relief coming off of him and his feeling of total trust in Taylor. Then I saw the moment he found out about Taylor and I's bet regarding his sexuality. It was a feeling of total devastation, almost as bad as the image I sent him of me finding out about David's imprint.

I caught Mark off guard, flipping him to his back, and biting at his neck. David pushed me, as a symphony of growls and yips came from all of us. Taylor stood, trembling, yelling for someone to come help_._

"_Shit! Taylor's going to phase!" I thought._

I looked over as my little brother exploded, running straight to David, scratching and gouging at David's back. I felt others phasing around us, as I got up to help Taylor, only to be pushed down by Mark, as he flew into Taylor, pushing him into a tree.

The sound of Taylor's body hitting the tree was excruciating to all of us and we all paused for a moment before I went back to David. Mark's thoughts were overwhelming both us all, as guilt set in, knowing he had injured his best friend. I could hear Taylor whimpering, as Embry and Collin walked up.

I was distracted again, and David now had the upperhand, flipping me, and putting his teeth no more than an inch from my neck. One bite would have meant certain death.

"_I'm not going to kill you. Stay away from imprint! She is MINE!" David thought._

Embry pushed David off of me, while Collin went to examine Taylor.

I had lost. Dad was right. I could never beat David Uley.

Eventually, I knew, he would win more than just a fight. He would win my Ray of sunshine. She would choose him because he was stronger and that was what the universe had planned.

I stood to phase back, as David did the same. I turned to walk towards Taylor. Trisha was standing by him, petting his fur, speaking softly, trying to get him to phase back, and watching David and I. We both stood looking at her, completely naked and without any words to make up for what she had seen. I hoped she hadn't seen much of the fight, but I knew by the look in her eyes, she had seen it all. Trisha stepped away as Taylor phased back. Collin carried him towards our house, as Trisha moved towards us.

I was running through my head what I should say. I knew she was pissed at me, not just for the fight, but for ignoring her for so long. And, I was embarrassed. She had basically just seen me get my ass kicked by the pack's dumbest member.

She moved towards David and I, still staring at us, as she raised her hand and slapped David across the cheek.

TRISHA'S POV

My hand stung and I heard the bones crack, but I didn't care. My Ethan. He tried to kill my Ethan.

"How dare you?! How dare you touch him?!" I screamed at David.

David shook his head at me, "I'm sorry. I just…"

"No, you don't get to talk," I pushed him, jabbing my finger into his chest, knowing I was inflicting absolutely no pain on him at all. "Why can't you leave me the hell alone? Huh? I've told you, repeatedly, that I don't want you. I want nothing to do with you. I wish," I stumbled over my next words, "I wish you'd have never been born!"

Tears were rolling down my cheeks, and I couldn't quit looking at Ethan. He wouldn't look at me though. He kept his head to the ground, as David's eyes started to fill with tears. He ran off, as Ethan stood there. I went to put my hand on Ethan's cheek but he pushed it away.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"I don't need you to console me. I'm not a child," Ethan snapped, still looking down, looking ashamed. "And I don't need you to defend me. I can take care of myself!" He ran off. He left me. I was only thinking of him and he left me. I hadn't seen him in so long, and being so close to him made my body ache. And he left.

I saw Collin still carrying Taylor as Embry helped Mark up. I looked at Mark, shaking my head. I was going to cry again. Why?! Why was I not out of freakin' tears by now?! Mark looked a little embarrassed, as he stood up completely naked. By now, seeing the wolf-boys naked like that, after transforming from giant wolves, didn't really affect me the way it would have most girls. Sure, it was hot. But once you've seen it, over and over, it kind of loses its appeal.

"It's okay, Mark. Just get up," I said, walking towards the Wahalla house.

I knew some major shit was about to go down. The whole pack was at the Wahalla house for a pack dinner. This was not going to be good. Taylor was hurt, Mark had caused it, I made David cry, and Ethan, well, who the fuck knows what's going on with Ethan!

The ruckus started as soon as Collin made it in the door. It took one look at Taylor's broken body to send everyone into an uproar.

"I'll call Carlisle," Sam said, moving to the phone.

Kim looked at Sam, scowling, "Yeah, you better! It's your fucking sons' fault he's like this!"

Emily moved forward to Kim, "Shut up, Kim! You weren't there! You don't know what happened!"

"And you fucking do?!" Kim snapped.

I was coherent and I knew what was going on but I couldn't process the fact that the women I love were being so heartless to each other. And more than that, it was my fault. I think Mom sensed my feelings, as she stepped in.

"Both of you stop it! This is ri-goddamn-diculous! Do you see Trisha? Do you see what this is doing to her?! I've been living with a fucking zombie since this whole imprint mess started!" Mom yelled to both of them.

"So who do you want your daughter to choose, Rachel? It's a fair question," Emily asked.

"No, no, you don't! You don't fucking put this on me! At this point, she could pick Mark for all I fucking care! I just want my daughter back! I want her whole again!" Mom started to tear up.

"This has gone on long enough! Kim, you need to tell your son to back the hell off. This whole mess would have been settled months ago if Ethan had left Trisha alone," Emily said.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hang on just a second! What makes you think Trisha would give into the imprint! In case you haven't noticed, she hates your imbecile of a son. Honestly, Emily, I've met yams with more going on upstairs than David!"

"Oh, and Ethan's any better?! That boy has his head in clouds most of the time. He's just a no-balls-too sensitive-pussy-animal lover and Trisha does not belong with him. A strong, independent girl like her belongs with a strong Alpha that can take care of her and protect her."

Kim was closing in on Emily's space and I knew what was coming. Kim was not tolerant of someone attacking her children.

"No, Trisha needs someone she can have an intelligent conversation without having to use grunts and hand signals!" Kim said, as she extended her right hand and shoved Emily.

"Oh shit," I heard Mom say, as Sam slammed down the phone, moving in between Kim and Emily. Jared walked in front of Kim, pulling her behind him protectively.

"What the fuck, Uley?!" Jared said.

"Control your wife, Wahalla!" Sam yelled in Jared's face.

"My wife can take care of herself! Maybe you should tell your wife to back the fuck off my son!" Jared rebutted.

It felt a little like Jerry Springer, as Jared pushed Sam, then Sam pushed Jared, then all hell broke loose! Punches were thrown, the word "fuck" or a derivative of it was said a total of 15 times, and both men ended up on the floor. It was kind of ironic that Mark pulled Sam off of Jared, as Taylor hobbled into the kitchen.

"What happened?" He asked.

"We're leaving!" Sam said, grabbing Emily and Mark.

Dad wasn't far behind, walking in the kitchen to grab Mom and myself.

"Paul," Jared started, but Dad put his hand up.

"Save it, Jared." I couldn't figure out why Dad was mad at Jared. In all honesty, he was just reacting like a husband should, protecting his wife from a threat he thought he saw.

One by one, everyone left the Wahalla house. My family sat in silence in the car watching them leave.

"What a great way to spend Saturday night, huh?" Dad said, shaking his head.

Mom turned around to look at me. "How's your hand?"

I had even forgotten that it hurt. Not because the pain wasn't there, but because they pain in my heart was greater than any physical pain I could have felt.

I shook my head, not knowing what to say. She gingerly took my hand, flipping it over, looking at it, and then kissing it.

"Paul, I think we might need to go to the ER. It looks broken."

Dad started the car and we drove to the hospital. They did the whole x-ray thing, put me in a cast, and sent me home, where I spent some much needed time by myself. I lay in bed that night thinking and I came to several conclusions:

My hand hurt like a bitch.

This imprint was tearing the pack apart.

Not only did my Dad hate me still, but now the women that I loved couldn't stand each other or me.

I would let Ethan go. If he wanted me, he would know where to find me. But I was tired, and I couldn't keep watching my love for him rip away years of relationships among others. When the time was right, if it was right, he would come back to me. Until then, I would make no attempt to contact him or see him. This was now his decision, no longer mine.

That night, like so many nights to follow, I cried myself to sleep.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Librarians Don't Lie"


	9. Birthdays & Wolf Dates

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**I do, however, own the following statement made by one of my students, as we watched the movie **_**Little Women**_** and it comes to the part where Beth dies:**

_***Joe: "One down, two more to go before it's Oscar worthy."**_

**Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! I can't believe I have passed the 100 mark! You guys are awesome! It literally makes my day to see reviews! **

**Don't forget to show some love to yay4shanghai, as well as another of my faves KupKakes09!**

***The cheesecake in this chapter is for yay4shanghai! **

**Other AN notes: I know I originally said this chapter would be "Librarians Don't Lie," but I've decided that will be the next chapter. This chapter, BTW, was my favorite so far to write! Enjoy!**

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Chapter 8: "Birthdays and Wolf Dates"

Trisha's POV

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

"Ugh!" I yelled, throwing my hand to turn off the alarm clock. I rolled over to look at the calendar on my closet door: Thursday, February 11th. "Great. Wonderful. Grand," I muttered to myself.

My door swung open, as Mom ran in, holding a donut with a candle in the middle. "Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday my dear Trisha-bug! Happy Birthday to you! Blow out the candle!"

I blew out the candle, as she kissed my forehead. "Happy 15th Birthday, my precious one," she whispered.

Today was my birthday. My 15th Birthday. And it was going to suck, just like everyday had since the night I had decided to distance myself from Ethan and wait for him to come to me.

Things had lightened within the pack, so to say. Emily, Kim, and Mom reconciled after the Wahalla's were nearly exiled from the reservation, following with the "Great Wolf-Momma Fight," as it was being called now. There were a few of the new wolves that actually thought it should be included in the legends that were told every bonfire. Sam vetoed that request.

I wasn't the only one with broken bones after that night either. Mark's assault on Taylor left him with three cracked ribs and a great story about how he took on one of the biggest of the wolves and lived to tell about it.

Taylor forgave him though and they became a rather close unit that I became a part of. Not long after, Anna (the only actual girl wolf besides Leah) gave birth to triplets and Taylor imprinted on the baby girl named Melody. I didn't see it happen, but from what Anna told Dad, it truly was the real-deal. It wasn't like my imprint, where the girl ran off screaming the name of another wolf. It was how it was supposed to be, just filled with love and admiration, and Taylor's dedication to be whatever little Melody needed for her whole life. Damn, babies! It's always easy for them!

"You know, you don't have to go to school today?" Mom said. We had a tradition that my birthday worked like a major holiday. I could do whatever I wanted on that day, including not going to school. But school was actually one of the few things that kept me sane nowadays. Little else interested me, and sometimes I even felt myself just going through the motions of life, not really feeling anything. If I stayed numb then I didn't have to cope with the fact that my life truly was shit.

"I want to go, Mom. It'll be fine, besides I have a major American history test," I slid off the bed, grabbing my robe and slippers.

She grabbed my wrist, pulling me to her, and hugging me to her chest. I could feel her breathing get ragged and she stroked my hair. I knew what she was thinking. She was thinking the same thing she's said everyday since the night of the fight. "I'm sorry."

I was sick of the "I'm sorrys" and the "poor things." I had become a cynical teenager filled with angst.

I pulled myself away from my Mom, and headed for the door. "Trisha…"

"Yeah, Mom," I said shortly.

"When's the last time you smiled?"

I turned to her and put the fakest smile I could on my face and then walked out.

When it was time to leave for school, I grabbed my usual apple for breakfast and headed for the door.

"Just a minute, Trisha. Uncle Jake and Aunt Nessie are on the phone," Mom said from the kitchen.

"Their not having sex again, are they?" I said quietly, under my breath. I could hear Dad chuckle a little from outside. Damn wolf hearing!

I tried to make my voice sound happy as I picked up the phone, "Hello."

"Happy Birthday!" Nessie and Jake said together.

"Thanks," I mumbled.

"Can you believe it? Fifteen?" Jake asked.

Nessie asked, "You know what, Trisha?"

"What?" I asked.

"I was 15 once!" She sounded so proud of herself.

So, like the angry teenager I am, I again said under my breath, "And you still look it."

Dad laughed again from the backyard.

"That's not very nice, Trisha," Nessie said.

Oh, no! Here come the tears, again! This was a habit of mine. Crying. It hadn't been, before the fight, now it happened at least once a day, in addition to the fact that I cried myself to sleep every night.

I started to sniffle a little.

"Jake, give me the damn phone. It's time for some girl talk," Nessie said.

"Fine, honey-bunches," Jake mumbled. I pretended to gag on the other end.

I took the phone from the kitchen to the den and flopped down on the couch.

"I'm sorry, Aunt Nessie. I didn't mean to say that."

I heard her sigh. "Trisha, you've got to snap out of this. Is this what you want out of life now? Nothing?"

"No, I just…I don't know what anything is anymore. Why can't life be like Math, huh? Why can't it all just be black and white, no grey area, always definite?" I choked back tears.

"Because then it wouldn't be any fun!" She said. "Look, I grew up in a house full of vampires. Things could always change at the drop of a hat, and there seemed to be only grey areas. And at times I could think of nothing more than escaping it, but then I realized I had my imprint to love me and keep me safe."

Shit! I knew where this was going.

"Trisha, does David still follow you?"

"Yes, everywhere. The other day at Borders I went to the restroom and I swear he would have gone in after me if he could have. Most of the time I just ignore him."

"Maybe, have you ever thought, you owe it to yourself, to see what would come of it?"

"Of me and David? Fuck, no, not gonna happen, no way, no how," I said.

"Watch your mouth, young lady!"

"Yes, Aunt Nessie," I said in a sing-song voice.

"Just think about it, okay? And try to have a good day! It's your birthday and each day is precious," Nessie said.

And then I added, "Unless you're a vampire and then each day is just another day to an immortal existence."

She giggled, "Go to school and be good. But not too good. I love you!"

"I love you, too, and that lug of a husband of your's," I said as I hung up the phone.

I took a deep breath, pursing my lips together, thinking really hard about what Nessie's insight to the imprint business.

"Don't hurt yourself thinking so hard," Dad chuckled, as he threw me my coat. "Ready to go?"

"Yep," I said, popping the 'p.'

This time in the car, in the morning, was really the only time Dad talked to me. Our relationship was slowly repairing itself, but it was nowhere near it had been pre-Ethan. I knew he loved me and he knew I loved him. We just both had funny ways of showing it.

My mind went back to my conversation with Nessie. I had to think of it as a possibility. Ethan wasn't beating down my door, so I might as well see what the universe had picked out for me, right?

DAVID'S POV

"Dude, today's her birthday, you know that right?" I said to Mark.

"David, please do not ask her out again. Maybe you should make that your birthday present to her, a day without harassment," Mark said.

"But where's the fun in that?"

I saw her get out of her car and kiss Paul on the cheek. I wondered what it would be like to be Paul's cheek right now. I bet her kisses were like mangos, sweet and juicy. Hmm, when's lunch again?

"How do I look?" I said to Mark, who laughed at me, again.

"The same as you did five minutes ago when you asked then," Mark said.

I swear she just looked at me. Did she? Oh, no, she totally did.

"Shit, bro, she's coming over here," I said elbowing Mark.

"I think that's probably your imagination getting the better of you," Mark chuckled and then got quiet. "Damn, she really is coming over here."

Trisha stopped in front me. She was scrunching up her lips. She looked a little like I do when I'm thinking really hard. It's a look I get during Spanish class when the teacher asks me a question and I don't understand a fucking word she said. (Which is most of the time, because of all the languages in the world, I'm pretty sure Spanish is the hardest to learn.) Hmm, Mexican food sounds really good right now.

"David, may I speak to you for a second?" Trisha said.

Holy Shit! She said my name! The most gorgeous creature in the history of creatures said my name. Okay, I totally have to play this cool…deep breath.

"Yeah, babe, whatever you want," I say, moving my head a little from side to side.

"My God," Mark gasps next to me, shaking his head.

She looked at me and spoke. "Okay, first off, I am not your 'babe,' so you can never call me that again, okay? Okay. Secondly, I was wondering if you had plans tomorrow evening. I know there's a really cool werewolf movie on in Port Angeles and I thought you might like to go. With me. If that's okay."

"Holy Mother," I whispered.

"Say something," Mark said quietly.

I couldn't say anything. I just looked at her. My tongue was paralyzed, wouldn't move.

"He would love to go. Did you want to do dinner and a movie or just the movie?" Mark asked.

"Both, I suppose. He does know he'll actually have to talk for himself, though, right?" She asked.

Mark chuckled and my eyes stayed on her. Her beautiful eyes, her beautiful hair, her beautiful red sweater, her beautiful cleavage…

"I think he should be able to manage some sort of conversation. Shall he pick you up at six?" Great, my brother was mackin' on my girl.

"That would be great. So, I guess it's a date." She looked at me, raising her eyebrows.

"I like movies," I managed to mumble, as Mark went from chuckling to full out laughing.

"That's good," she smiled and giggled, at me. "So, tomorrow night? Six, right?"

I nodded. She started to walk towards the school and I watched her before shouting out, "Happy Birthday, Trisha! I love you!"

Her eyes widened and she ran in the school. Students started laughing until I gave them the evil eye and they know not to mess with me.

"You did not just do that?" Mark asked as he shook his head, again.

"Huh?"

Trisha's POV

I cannot believe I did that. I cannot believe I just walked up to him and asked him out. What the hell was I thinking? And then he said he loved me! How is a girl supposed to respond to that? And in front of the whole school! The whole school!

Just add that to the joys of being a sophomore at La Push High School. I dreaded the mornings. My classes weren't that hard, they just always seemed so long. Lunch was spent with the other pack-kids, watching the new pups fight each other for the last French fry or pickle. I sat on the opposite end as David and Mark. Ethan didn't sit with us anymore. I don't even know if he came to school anymore. My favorite classes, my afternoon classes of Spanish and P.E. hardly made up for the shitty morning I had. At least I had P.E. at the end of the day, and didn't have to worry about changing back into my school clothes. I generally kept my "Property of La Push Wolves" T-shirt and shorts on. It was actually really ironic that our mascot was the wolf. If people only knew!

Today was no different. Mom picked me up after school to take me for a little mother-daughter bonding time. We met several other wolf-girls for pedicures and coffee. Then it was off to Grandpa Billy's for a special family birthday dinner.

Sue Clearwater cooked for us. (She wasn't technically family, but she and Grandpa were friends, and Charlie was coming, so it was a give-in Sue would be there.) She made my favorites, chicken parmesan and garlic bread, and for dessert…cheesecake! It was delicious!

Opening presents at the Black house was always fun, because you really never knew what you might get. This year was quite the surprise. I got one box. One box from the whole family. Great! I ripped the purple wrapping paper slowly, opening the box to find a beautiful silver keychain with delicately engraved with my initials.

"What's this?" I asked.

Grandpa Billy laughed. "That, my dear, is for the keys to your new car. Well, not new. Technically, I don't think you can call a 1965 Ford Mustang new, but you get the drift."

"But I'm not sixteen, yet," I said.

"Well, you haven't seen the car yet, or should I say, car frame. It will take us at least a year to get it ready!" Dad chuckled.

"It was actually Uncle Jake's idea. He said when he was going through a particularly difficult time, working on project like this helped to keep him going," Mom said, kissing my cheek.

I sat for a second looking around at my family staring at me.

"I don't know what to say."

"Oh, for heaven's sake, just say thanks and help us pick out a paint color!" Sue said.

Everyone laughed, including me. It was the first good laugh I had had in a long time.

"Thank you," I said, and the tears started again.

"No, honey, please don't cry," Mom said, pulling me to her side.

"It's just so nice. And I don't deserve it. And I just have the most wonderful family. I love you all so much and I can't help it." I sounded like a blubbering idiot, but I was so thankful to feel normal for even just the slight bit of time that I couldn't help but cry.

I wiped the tears, as Sue passed out cheesecake to everyone.

"Oh, sorry to change the subject, but Anna called and she needs a babysitter tomorrow night. She wondered if you might be interested, Trisha. She said she'd pay you," Mom said, wiggling her eyebrows.

Well, this should go smoothly.

"I actually can't. I have a date," I blurted out, really fast, hoping no one would hear.

Everyone, including myself, dropped their forks. They all stared back at me until Charlie was the only one with enough courage to say anything.

"With who?" he asked.

"Umh, funny thing, actually," I said.

"You're stalling," Dad said, looking like he was about to pop a vein. I knew he thought it was with Ethan, though I'm not sure why. He knew I hadn't seen him lately.

"David Uley." I blurted out, really fast, again hoping no one would hear.

There was a collective gasp from the audience, as Dad's face softened and turned into a smile.

"You finally took him up on all those offers?" He asked.

"No, actually, I asked him. Well, I kinda asked David and Mark translated for him. I don't know, though. I think I might actually have a date with both of the Uleys."

Each of the family's faces had different emotions. Mom smiled, Dad looked like he had just won the lottery, but Grandpa Billy, his face was not happy. He stared at me, shaking his head. He didn't say anything else to me until we were leaving.

"Rach, can I steal Trisha for sec?" He asked as we were walking out the door.

"Um, sure, Dad. Is everything okay?" Mom asked.

"Yeah, just need her help with something," he said looking up at me.

Mom walked to the car and Dad opened her door for her. It was funny to see him suddenly act gentlemanly, but I knew his behavior was all due to my date with David.

"What do you need help with, Grandpappy?" I asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Is this what you want? Is David who you want?"

What? Throughout this whole imprinting ordeal, Grandpa Billy hadn't said much of anything, not to me, not to anyone. Why all of the sudden, when I decided to give in does he question me?

"I don't know what I want anymore. I just know that I'm tired. I'm tired of worrying and fighting and crying and everything else I've been for the past months. I just need to see, see what's out there," I said, trying to act more grownup than I am.

"Look at me, Trisha," he pulled my hand into his. I turned to him. "You damn well better be doing this for yourself and not that jackass father of yours. Do you hear me?"

I had to admit that a big part of me was doing it for Dad. He was huge part of what was making life so hard right now. I needed him to be my Dad again. But, I assured Billy this was for me. I was doing this to test the waters.

"I actually do have another gift for you," Grandpa Billy said. He waved his hand for me to come closer and pulled a small velvet bag out of his jacket pocket. "Put out your hand."

I opened my hand, palm up, waiting to see what would come out of the bag. He shook it a little and then poured the contents into my waiting hand. It was a necklace, a beautiful silver necklace with a small heart pendant. It had the name "Sarah" engraved on it.

I held it between my fingers like a precious gem, as Grandpa cleared his throat.

"It was your Grandmother's. I've been saving it for you since the day you were born," he smiled at me. "I know Sarah's only your middle name but I thought you might like it anyway."

I turned it over and the back read "All My Love, Billy."

"Grandpa, I don't know what to say," I sat on his lap, just like when I was little.

He stroked my cheek. "You remind me a lot of her. Strong, independent, vivacious, and so full of life. I know you will be a great wife and mother someday, just like you have always been a great daughter, granddaughter, niece, and friend." He pulled my chin to meet his eyes, slipping the necklace on me and fastening it. "Looks like it was made for you."

I could see the tears in his eyes and I hugged him close. I kissed his cheek and Mom walked in.

She smiled when she saw the necklace. "He's been itching to give that to you since before you left the hospital fifteen years ago today. It's beautiful, sweetheart."

Dad rushed through the door. "What the freakin' hell is taken so long?"

"Zip it, Paul!" Mom snapped.

"Yes, dear," Dad said, kissing her hair.

I waved good bye to Grandpa Billy as I climbed into the backseat. As I sat there, rubbing the heart pendant between my fingers, I realized that what I had thought would be the worst birthday of my life, had become the best.

DAVID'S POV

"Superbad black leather jacket, check. Kickass black converse shoes, check. Seductive cologne, check and check," I said to myself checking myself out in the mirror.

I fixed a few wild hairs and practiced my "hello" for when I picked Trisha up.

"Do you have your keys?" Mark asked. Always the thinker that one. Of course I had my keys, they're right here in my pock…shit, where are those keys? "You don't have them, because I have them."

"Thanks, little bro."

"You know I'm half tempted to go with you just to see how everything goes and to fill in conversation when you tongue does the paralysis thing again," Mark said, helping me fix the bow on Trisha's birthday present.

"Yeah, that wouldn't be weird. 'Hello, love of my life, hope you don't mind if my gay brother goes with us on our date.' Awkward, dude, awkward." I did wonder sometimes what exactly he was thinking but I usually thought it was a good idea not to ask. Mark used big words that no one understood. Sometimes he would even stump the teachers at school. That's why he was in all the Honors classes and I was lucky I had him to do my homework.

"David Uley," Dad said from the kitchen.

"Samuel Uley," I said back to him.

Dad walked in, cocking his eyebrow. "Are you excited, son?"

"Uh, hell yeah!" I said.

"Good. I have something for you, and for your brother. Listen to me, David, you are in NO WAY to use this tonight, do you hear me? Your mother and I just want you to be prepared when the time does come."

"Is that a command?" Mark asked, elbowing me.

"If it needs to be, yes," Dad said, fiddling with a box on the table in the doorway.

Holy shit! Was he freakin' serious?! Condoms?

"Now, here's one for you and one for Mark," Dad said handing them to us.

"You make it sound like Halloween candy, Dad. I feel like I should be wearing a mask," Mark said.

"All I know is they better be Extra-Extra Large, if you know what I'm saying," I elbowed Mark back.

"Just put it in your wallet and shut up," Dad said.

I was too busy trying to put the condom in my wallet without it sticking out. How weird would that be? "_Uh, Trisha, I'm gonna pay for the popcorn", and boom! A condom falls out._

"Sorry, Dad," I said, finally putting my wallet in my pocket.

"Please be on your best behavior tonight. It's not just the wrath of Paul you have to fear."

"I know, Jacob Black's niece, Billy Black's granddaughter, related to the Cullens by marriage, yeah, yeah, I get it."

_Time to go trust fate_, I thought as I walked out the door.

TRISHA'S POV

I heard his truck coming from down the road and put on extra lip gloss, waiting for him to come to the door. I had no idea what tonight held, I just needed to try. I heard the doorbell ring and Dad invite David in. I stayed hidden until Dad called my name. I put a smile on my face and walked out. There David Uley stood with a basket of apples and a grin as wide as the Grand Canyon on his face. I smiled back, grabbing my purse.

"These are for you. For your birthday," David said shoving the apples into my hands. "I wanted to get you something and Mom said you eat apples like all day long. I don't want you to run out."

It really was a sweet gesture. "Thank you, David."

I put the apples in the kitchen, while Dad went over "groundrules" for taking his daughter out. The normal: home by midnight, no kissing at all, and then a threat that he would see everything the first time David phased.

David truly was a gentleman, opening doors, being very careful with me. Dinner was an adventure as he inhaled spaghetti, while I daintily ate my lasagna. I had taken two bites and he was completely finished.

"Sorry," he said, shyly. I giggled at him. He was patient while I ate and I let him finish my plate when I was full.

During perhaps the most ridiculous werewolf movie ever made, when the rest of the audience cowered and screamed in fear, David and I laughed at how unrealistic the wolves were.

"You've seen me phased. Please tell me I don't look that dumb," he asked.

"No, you look more like a puppy dog," I said.

"Geez! Thanks," he said.

I actually didn't have a horrible time, but…

Being with David like that, being close to him, laughing with him, only made me realize how much I loved Ethan and how that hadn't really changed. I had done everything in my power to push my love for him away and I only now realized no matter how much I try, I can't shake him. Ethan is my soulmate, and though I might flatter David by going out with him, I knew where my heart truly lie. I felt like Ethan was with me, always, even though I knew he wasn't, I could sense him.

Dropping me off at the house after the date, David gave me a friendly hug.

"Thank you for going out with me tonight," he said.

"Thank you for taking me," I said.

He started to walk away and then turned to me. "I'll still be patient. You have to know I'm not really that bad a guy, right?"

I nodded to him. He wasn't really that bad a guy. But, for me, he just wasn't my Ethan.

I cried myself to sleep again that night, feeling like Ethan was near, I felt that periodically now, which might have been a product of my imagination, which wanted him around so desperately it would do anything to soothe me. The feeling of his presence lulled me to sleep and like a final birthday present from the gods I had good dreams. I dreamt of Ethan.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Librarians Don't Lie"

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**Another AN: Sorry guys, but I wanted to share a couple things about this chapter. First, a lot of the birthday stuff is actually things my family does for our birthdays. All birthdays are guaranteed calls from all family members singing Happy Birthday. The donut thing has been known to happen, too. Plus, the "I was 15 once" thing comes from my dad, who like me is a teacher, and loves to let his students know he was their age once. **

**Hope you enjoyed the chapter! R & R**


	10. Librarians Don't Lie

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**I do, however, own the following statement made by me referring to the part in the Twilight movie where Bella and Edward go off into the woods when he tells her he's a vampire:**

_***Me: "And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why teacher supervision is absolutely necessary! You never know when your students will run off into the woods with vampires!"**_

**Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! You guys are awesome! It literally makes my day to see reviews! **

**Don't forget to show some love to yay4shanghai, as well as another of my faves KupKakes09!**

**WARNING: There is an almost lemon in this chapter! Not quite, but…well, just read and find out!**

****************************************************************************

Chapter 8: "Librarians Don't Lie"

TRISHA'S POV

The upside to my date with David was my Dad's new attitude. When I needed a ride to the library the day after, he was all too eager to take me, quizzing me on the details of my date. I tried to be truthful, without letting the revelation of my lingering feelings for Ethan slip through.

"Did he kiss you?" Dad asked with a grin on his face.

"Ugh, no! It was just a date, Dad. One date. Don't go sending out wedding invitations," I said, annoyed.

"Yet," he said, smiling and patting my hand. "At least you're over that little Wahalla shit."

I wasn't exactly sure what he meant by "over." In no way had my behavior over the last months indicated I had moved on with my life. But I heard the deeper meaning in his statements. He had no intention of EVER letting Ethan win; it was all David for him. So, now, after realizing just how much I loved and missed everything about Ethan, I felt my heart struggle to compromise between the two of the men I loved more than anything, my father and Ethan.

"So, what's this project you're working on? I don't understand why anyone in their right mind would go to the library on a Saturday," Dad said, shaking his head, while I tried to imagine what kind of student he had been in high school. I knew Mom was an above average student. Always did her work, studied hard, and wanted very much to succeed and get the hell off the reservation. The irony of her story being that no matter how much you want something, sometimes your family needs you and that trumps everything else. Not to mention, had Mom not returned to the reservation, she would never had met, imprinted, and married my father and I would not exist.

"It's a paper, actually. About why the western states let women have the right to vote before other states did," I said.

"That sounds bor-ring!" Dad said chuckling. "I'm just kidding, kiddo."

I just shook my head, as we pulled into the library parking lot.

"What time will you be finished?" Dad asked.

"I don't know. Do you want me to see if Helen can bring me home?" I asked, hoping he would say yes.

"That's fine. But if she can't, you call me, okay?" he asked, behaving like an overprotective oaf.

"Sure thing, Dad," I said getting out of the car.

"Bye, pumpkin. I love you." Holy shit! I hadn't heard those words from him in months. I could feel my heart swell, as he smiled at me.

"I love you, too, Daddy," I said back, shutting the car door and walking towards the library.

The La Push Public Library was fairly small but it would work for a high school paper. I had an advantage because one of the wolf-girls, Helen, Collin's wife, was the head librarian. Anytime I had ever needed anything in the library, she was more than willing to bend over backwards to help me. Helen was a unique character to say the least: quiet and reserved most of the time, but somewhat spunky in her own right. I also heard that she had a thing for freaky sex, like really freaky sex, complete with leather and whips. But that really didn't matter to me. To me, she was just Helen the Librarian and Wolf-Girl Extraordinaire.

"Hey, Helen!" I said, walking into her small office in the back of the library.

"Well, Miss Trisha, it's been too long. How are you, my dear?" She asked as she put the book she was reading to the side.

"I'm good. Got to write a paper for American History," I smiled.

"That's not what I meant. I heard you had a date last night."

"What? Does like the whole reservation know?"

"No, but the wolf-girls do. You're a member now, no matter how involuntarily so you have to spill. How did it go?"

I could trust Helen, right? I mean, sure, she had told Collin about Ethan and mine's activities on the beach, but it wasn't her fault he was an idiot and couldn't contain his thoughts, spilling to Embry, who then spilled to the pack. I knew that as long as she could keep from telling Collin, my thoughts would be safe with her.

"I'm kinda confused, actually," I said.

"Well, have a seat," Helen said, pointing to the chairs in front of her desk.

I sat down, squirming as she leaned towards me, then got up to shut her office door.

"So what seems to be the problem, Miss Trisha?" She asked, looking like a total psychiatric, complete with a pen in her hands and a notepad on her lap.

"I had a good time on my date last night. I really did. And David was very sweet," I said, afraid to look her in the eyes.

"I feel a 'but' coming in though, right?" Helen asked.

I thought for a minute. I hadn't said it out loud. I couldn't say it out loud. No one would have understood me. But Helen asked. She must know something isn't right.

"But, he's not Ethan." I said, shuddering a little at the sound of my voice saying his name.

Helen sat back in her chair and chuckled.

"What?" I asked.

"And he never will be, sweetie. David Uley is a great kid, he's not the brightest crayon in the box, but he's a good kid. I saw the way you and Ethan were. In all honesty, it was stronger than most imprints I've seen."

"Really?" I asked.

"Librarians don't lie, dear," she smiled. "Don't get me wrong, I am extremely thankful for my imprint. I love Collin very much and I wouldn't trade him or my life in La Push for the world. But I know love when I see it, and what you and Ethan had, that was beyond love."

I couldn't help but worry that it was too little, too late. Where do I start? How do I make Ethan realize that being with him is the ONLY thing that mattered to me? Hell, how do I even find Ethan? I knew I felt him at times, but that meant nothing. I needed to touch him, to hold him, to tell him what an idiot I had been.

"Thank you, Helen," I said.

"You are so much more than welcome," Helen said, making me smile. "Now, in what direction may I point you?"

"Well, I need either Western American History or Women's History," I said.

"Look in the Historical Non-Fiction and then Reference. If you need something copied, just bring it up to me, okay?" She said sweetly.

"Thank you, again, Helen."

She just winked at me.

Off I went to the Historical Non-Fiction, where I was almost sure I would not be able to concentrate on anything other than my current Ethan predicament.

ETHAN'S POV

I knew she was here. I could smell her. She had such an amazing smell, like apples and cinnamon, kind of appropriate since she ate apples like they were going out of style. I didn't want her to see me. I had been following her for so long and, until now, just seeing her face and knowing she was okay, was getting me by. But after I saw her out with David, I knew I couldn't stand by anymore. I need her. I need her like I need food or oxygen, and, as much as living with Seth was great, I needed her company.

I tried to be as quiet as possible, knowing it was the library, after all, and we always hated when Helen gave us the "Shh! Look," as we called it. I was trying to avoid Helen right now. I blamed part of this chaos on her. If she had kept her big mouth shut about the hands issue, things would have been a lot better, but no, she had to blab to her wolf-husband, who's continued lack of control on his thoughts mirrored some of the new pups. Unfortunately for me, her librarian senses were in full swing and she caught me.

"Is there something I can help you find, Ethan Wahalla?" Helen asked, standing in the doorway of her office, one eyebrow cocked.

"No, ma'am, just looking for a book," I tried say politely.

"Try something in Historical Non-Fiction. We have some great books on Western American History and Women's History. Might want to check it out."

"Thanks for the tip," I said.

_Alright, so here we go_. I thought to myself, mustering up the courage to make my way to the Historical Non-Fiction section. Her scent got stronger and I could hear her humming a soft tune. It sounded like "All You Need Is Love" by the Beatles and I couldn't help but smile. I saw her looking at a book about women in Wyoming and watched as she pursed her lips, obviously processing whatever it was she was reading. I slipped into the shelf in front of her, just staying a distance to keep her from suspecting anything. Then I saw her face. She looked content and happy, reading through her book and I questioned whether this was a good idea. I turned to walk away.

TRISHA'S POV

I was smiling. It had been so long since I was happy, but knowing that maybe everything with Ethan would work out made me smile. And then I sensed him. I knew he had to be here, near me. I felt my stomach flip a little and could smell his familiar scent. It smelled of Christmas trees and licorice. It was very unique and I knew it could only belong to him. Why if he was so close, would he not acknowledge me? Did he not see I needed him? I contemplated whether to say anything, for fear he would freak out and leave.

"Ethan?" I don't know why I said anything. I knew he wasn't going to respond. I slipped the book back into its place on the shelf and could still sense him.

"Ethan, I know you're there. I can feel you. Please talk to me," I begged, choking on the last words, knowing he was so close and yet so far.

Nothing. Well, this was a rotten idea. I could feel the tears starting and I needed to get out of this damn stuffy library before I screamed. I turned and took a step before walking into a wall of tanned muscle.

It was him. It was Ethan, my Ethan, looking down at me with conflicted eyes. He was so sexy, so godlike it hurt to stare directly at him and he smiled at me, softly. I couldn't control myself any longer, I threw my arms around his neck, pulling him closer, positive that I was never going to let him go. It had been too long and I needed him. I grabbed the back of his neck, pushing my lips on his, finally being able to taste him after months of fasting. Immediately I felt my head start to spin and my heart speed. My stomach flipped and my abdomen start to tightened, I had forgotten the awesomeness that was Ethan's kisses.

He must have felt my body go a little limp, as he tightened his hold on me.

"Happy to see me?" He whispered in my ear, making me shiver and giving me goosebumps down my spine.

I pulled his lips to me again. He grabbed my butt, moving my legs to wrap his waist and then propping me onto a bookshelf.

"Good thing no one reads Historical Non-Fiction," he said, softly, before returning his lips to mine.

It was like we had been separated for centuries, that we had been deprived of a basic necessity, and now that we had it, we couldn't stop. My love for him swelled my heart and I never wanted to let him go. We just kept kissing. Sweet and innocent then rough and passionate. His tongue prodded my lips, requesting entrance that I more than willingly gave. He explored my mouth and I exchanged the favor.

This was not going to do. I needed more. He needed more. In almost as if he could sense my thoughts, he said, "Seth's car's in the parking lot."

"NOW!" I whispered sharply.

We didn't stop kissing and I stayed in his arms as we made our way to Seth's car. He opened the back door, pushing me onto the seat, crawling between my legs and shutting the door behind him. It was like we had never been apart, our bodies adjusting to fit in the backseat, clinging to one another with everything we had.

He moaned as I slid my hands down his chest letting them rest on the hard package between his legs as he moved his mouth to my jawline.

"Ethan…" I moaned, my hands moving from his back to his sides, pulling his shirt off. I pulled my coated off, as the heat from his body began to make me sweat. He ran his hands to the hem of my shirt, removing it in one swift motion. My fingers began drawing circles on his chest. He was more gorgeous than I had remembered. His chest was well-defined and muscular, but soft and loving as well. His lips were still on mine. I slipped my fingers down to the waistband of his sweatpants, toying with it, as he groaned. Finally, I slid his sweats down, removing them, thinking I would find his normal boxers. They weren't there.

"Going commando?" I mumbled into his ear.

"Kind of a necessity when you are likely to morph into a giant wolf on a dime," he whispered back as he began sucking on the skin behind my ear. Oh, how that drove me crazy! I could literally feel my eyes roll into the back of my head.

He ran his hands to my back, trying to unclasp my bra. He fumbled with it for a few minutes before giving up. "Shit!" He said.

I giggled and grabbed his hands, moving them to the back to my bra, guiding him to finally unclasp it. One at a time, he pushed the straps off my shoulders. His index finger found the middle of my cleavage and pulled my bra off exposing my breast. This was new for us. He had never seen me this naked before, even when we'd spent time with his finger inside me, I always had a shirt on and he never really looked, just felt me.

He moved his mouth down and placed hot, wet kisses on my breast. I arched my back, feeling his erection push into my groin. I wanted him. I wanted all of him. I needed him to make me feel complete. I was perfectly content with losing my virginity in the backseat of Seth's car, as long as it was with Ethan.

But part of me was beginning to freak out. What if this wasn't real? What if he didn't come back for me, he just saw me and I jumped him? I started to doubt myself, while he continued kissing down my stomach, unbuttoning my jeans, and pulling them off.

"Stop!" I screamed. He looked at me like I had lost my mind and part of me wondered if I had.

"What's wrong?" Ethan sat up to look at me.

"I can't…I need…" I couldn't find the words. Hell, I didn't know if there were coherent words to describe what I wanted to say.

"Trisha, you know there is no way I'm going to make love to you in the backseat of a car, if that's what you're worried about? I want our first-time to be special. This is just us getting reacquainted, is all. You don't have to do anything you don't want to, you know that, right? I would never force you, ever," Ethan said, commanding my eyes to his which were like pools of molten mahogany.

I felt a little silly. He thought this was about sex. Though sex was on my mind, it was on a back burner. I needed to know what this was, what we were.

"I just…I need to know that this is real…that you want me," I stuttered.

He smiled, "I was going to ask you the same thing." He sat up a little more, placing his hands over his erection, blushing a little.

"What do you mean?" I asked, furrowing my eyes.

"Well, I was afraid you might think this was just a quick fondle and then we'd go back to the way it was. Never talking, me following you around everywhere," he didn't move.

I felt a lump develop in my throat. He had been with me! I knew it! I knew he still loved me! I pulled him down on top of me, crushing my lips to his.

"Ethan…" I moaned into his ear. "I have missed you so much." I brought my lips back to his mouth and he pulled away.

"I love you, Ray. I always have. I always will. No matter what," he whispered, stroking my cheek.

"I love you, Ethan. I always have. I always will. No matter what," I whispered back to him.

He smiled as I pushed a few stray hairs from his forehead. He kissed my cheek, trailing down back to my breast, then to my stomach, stopping right at the edge of my panties. He placed his hands in between my legs, spreading them slightly. I placed my hands in his hair as I shivered. He moved his fingers to start easing the panties down. I lifted my butt up, as he continued sliding them down. And then…

_Bam! Bam! Bam! _Someone was pounding on the window.

"What the fuck?!" Ethan yelled.

"I know you two are in there! I can see the windows all fogged up and I can hear you!" the voice said.

"Helen." We said together.

"Paul called and he's on his way. You better get clothes on and come to my office, NOW!" Helen demanded.

"For a librarian, she's fucking annoying!" Ethan said.

I couldn't help but laugh as I searched the back of Seth's car for my clothes. Bra over here, shirt over there, jeans on the floorboard. Luckily, Ethan had had the sense to leave my socks on. He pulled his sweatpants on, sliding his shirt over his head, and tying his shoes.

"My Dad is not going to be at all happy," I said, pulling my coat on.

"He's not going to know. We'll talk about it later, okay?"

He kissed my forehead, hugging me to him one last time before we had to leave the bliss of Seth's backseat for the sullenness of Helen's office.

"Here," Helen said throwing a bar of soap at me.

"What am I supposed to do with this? And why do you have a bar of soap with you?" I asked.

"You need to go in the bathroom and scrub down."

"Why exactly?"

"Your Dad is going to walk in and smell Ethan all over you."

"But we didn't do anything but makeout."

"At any point was his saliva or any other part of him on you?" I didn't even have time to answer. "Exactly," she said turning to Ethan. "You need to get out of here, too. Collin's coming to walk through, dilute your scent a little."

Helen looked at us and then shook her head.

"You two are lucky my favorite books are romances. You have exactly two minutes, and then Ethan you have to leave. I don't want to have scrub blood from the Reference section after Paul beats you to a pulp." She closed the blinds on her office door, shutting it, as she walked out.

Ethan turned me to look at him.

"This is not going to be like it was before. Okay?"

I nodded to him as tears started to run down my cheeks.

"We have some stuff to talk about. Can you sneak out tonight and meet me at Seth's?"

"Will Seth be there?" I asked, not wanting to doom anymore people than absolutely necessary.

"He will, but he'll be fine. I'll wait for you. Just come whenever you can, okay?" I nodded again as he kissed my forehead. "I love you, Ray. And I'll see you in a little while."

He pulled me into a passion-filled kiss, groping at my butt and groaning when he had to let go. He started to turn to leave when I was struck with fear. I couldn't let him leave. I grabbed his wrist and he turned back to look at me.

"Please promise…" That was all I could get out. I needed him to say he was never leaving. I needed to know this wasn't just a coincidence.

"I promise this is just the beginning, okay? I'm not leaving you ever again. EVER. You will have to decide when this is over. I can't NOT be with you." And then he kissed me softly on the lips, smiling.

"What?" I asked.

"I'm just imagining you in the La Push Public Library bathroom trying to wash my scent off of you," he said with a smirk. "It's kind of dangerous, alluring, and sexy."

I smiled and watched as he walked to Seth's car.

"Young lady, your Dad is going to be here any minute," Helen picked up the soap, placing it in my hand, "bathroom, scrub, now!"

"Ethan was right. You can be fucking annoying," I mumbled.

The spongebath in the bathroom would have disappointed Ethan. It was anything but sexy, using the rough paper towels to wash every square inch of my body. I was afraid I would be red from scrubbing so hard.

I walked out to see Dad talking to Collin and Helen, grinning to show his white teeth. He smiled at me and waved for me to join them.

"There's my baby girl," he said, kissing my hair. Oh shit! Would my hair smell like Ethan? I hadn't even thought about that. I couldn't exactly wash my hair in the bathroom and then be presentable for when he arrived.

Helen looked at me, "I was just telling your Dad about all the research you've done, and how surprised you were to find out about women's voting rights in the West."

I nodded. I knew Helen was using this as a cover, because she knew Dad would never prod for information, especially about the voting rights of women in the West, as he said before, that subject was bor-ring!

"Still sounds boring to me," Dad said, shaking his head. "We better get home. Your Mom's making some funky soup-thingy for dinner. And David's called three times."

_Perfect!_ I thought. _Funky soup and David! Nice!_

Dad ushered me to the car, placing his arm around my shoulders. His smile remained as he drove home. The car ride was peaceful and serene and gave me an opportunity to make a mental list of the things Ethan and I needed to discuss.

Mom's "funky-soup thingy" was only soup served in a bread bowl but it thoroughly confused Dad and I couldn't control my laughter.

"What the hell is this?" He asked.

"It's soup in bread," Mom said, shaking her head.

"Am I s'pose to eat the bowl?" Dad asked, examining the bread.

"If you want. It's really not that difficult a concept, Paul," Mom said.

He took a bite of soup and then looked at me. "Have you called David back yet?"

"Not yet," I said. I did have every intention of calling him but I knew Ethan and I needed to talk first.

"Don't leave him waiting too long, sweetie," Dad said.

"I won't."

"You are going to call him, right?"

"Of course, Dad. I just need to let him sweat it out a little." I lied.

The rest of the evening was quiet, as I spent a Saturday night writing the paper I was actually supposed to have researched and written that afternoon. Before 10 o'clock, I was an expert on women's voting rights in the West and about to burst at the seams if I didn't get to Ethan soon.

I collapsed on the couch, in between my parents. I glanced at the clock: 11:00. _Oh, come on already! Go to bed!_ I thought.

Not ten minutes later, Dad did his fake yawn, tapping Mom on the shoulder.

"Ah, look at the time. Rach, you ready to hit the hay?"

Mom rolled her eyes. Dad puckered his lips to her and began motioning his head to the bedroom.

"For the love of God, if you are going to have sex, could you at least wait for me to get to my room?!" I exclaimed.

Mom and Dad burst into laughter.

"Ah, Rach, our daughter knows us too well," Dad said, rustling my hair.

"That is disgusting," I said. "I'm going to bed. Please try to control yourselves."

I waited until I heard the door shut, followed by Dad's growl and Mom's giggle. I crept to my bedroom, fluffing my hair, before sliding open the window and creeping out. I walked quickly to Seth's and knocked on the door.

"Hiya, Trish," Seth said, opening the door. He stared at me for a long minute and laughed.

"Please tell me you didn't just imprint on her too," Ethan said from behind him.

Seth chuckled, "Lucky for you, no, cuz I'm quite a catch."

He motioned for me to come in, as Ethan pulled me to the room he was staying in.

"No fucking in my house, you hear me?!" Seth yelled at us.

I flopped down on the bed, Ethan next to me.

"Explain to me why the world seems to be obsessed with sex? I had never noticed it that much before. Everyone is having sex! Everyone!" I said.

Ethan chuckled and grabbed my hand, "We're not." I smiled at him and felt a little embarrassed. I inched closer to him, placing my hand on his thigh. "I'm okay with us not doing it yet, Ray. We're gonna be mature about this and wait for the right time."

Again with the sex. We needed to talk about something else, because listening to him talk about sex, made me want to rip off his pants and shove him inside me. He moved his hand, stroking my cheek, smiling as he leaned in to softly kiss my lips.

"We have a lot to talk about, babe," I said to him.

"I know. I've just missed you," he gave me a quick peck.

"So…" I started. "I want you to know that I love you. I have always loved you and that will never change. My date with David," he cut me off.

"It's okay, Trisha, you don't have to explain that to me." I could see the pain in his eyes. "I saw how you were. I could hear you cry at night. I know it sounds crazy, but I almost wish I could thank David. That night, watching you, I saw you smile more than I had in months."

I shook my head, "But that doesn't mean…" He cut me off again.

"It's okay, I understand. You had to do it, to see, right? See what would happen?"

"Exactly." I thought for a minute about how to put what I was going to say. I determined it was best to just say it and get it over with. "My Dad…"

He cut me off again. This was something that before would have driven me nuts…a man who wouldn't let me get a word in. But as long as it was Ethan that was interrupting me, I didn't mind.

"I know this imprint shit means a lot to your Dad. But more importantly, I know how much your Dad means to you," he said, rubbing circles on my hand with his thumb. "He didn't treat you the same after he found out about us. I only saw it get worse. I won't let that happen again, Ray. Your family is too important to you."

"But what am I supposed to do? You know, he knows, that if I had to choose between him or you, I would always choose you." That was what it really boiled down to after all, Ethan or Dad. We all three knew it and so far I could find no solution to the problem. Luckily for me, the love of my life had already thought that through.

"This is my proposition," Ethan said, pulling me into his lap. "In order to keep peace within your family, you have to keep seeing David. I know that, okay? It doesn't mean I have to like it, but I know that's what has to happen."

Where in the hell could he be going with this?

"So, I think you have to put on a show. Make it look like you're giving in," he said.

"But I can't do that to you. What about _us _us? I love you, Ethan, and I can't hurt you," I whispered.

"I didn't say we weren't going to be together. I just said you were going to need to improve your acting skills," he smirked at me. "You and I will sneak around like we did before. And, for lack of a better way of putting it and at the risk of sounding possessive, you have my 'permission' to date David."

Holy Mother! That was the compromise. Date David and sneak around with Ethan. I had to admire the plan but it also scared the shit out of me.

"I'm not finished though, Trisha. You can date David, but don't ever forget that you belong to me," he semi-growled and I felt my body heat up as he crushed his lips to mine.

"I could never forget that," I said. We kissed as our tongues began the epic battle for supremacy. I personally think he won, probably because I let him.

He walked me close to home before having to turn back for fear Dad would catch his scent. _This is going to work, _I thought to myself. _It has to, I cannot live without Ethan._

I made a list of things to do for the next day before going to sleep. It read:

Wake up and think about Ethan.

Call David and set up a date.

Countdown the hours until Mom and Dad go to bed and I can make my way to Ethan.

This had to work, right?

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Giving In, Well Sorta"


	11. Giving In, Well Sorta

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**I do, however, own the following statement made by one of my students regarding a certain GQ magazine with a hunkified Robert Pattinson on the cover:**

_***Raul: "Miss B, you need to get that magazine outta here. It's increasing global warming it's so hot!"**_

**Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! You guys are awesome! It literally makes my day to see reviews! **

**Don't forget to show some love to yay4shanghai, as well as another of my faves KupKakes09! **

****************************************************************************

Chapter 10: "Giving In, Well Sorta"

DAVID'S POV

I was really confused. Really confused.

"I thought the boy was s'pose to make the girl wait for the phone call?" I asked Momma.

I was waiting for my Trisha to call. I had called her house three times on Saturday, but my little genius was at the library. I couldn't sit still. I knew I should have followed her. But, no, Dad talked me out of it. "You have to learn to trust her or she'll never trust you," he said. Now I was in a pissy mood and felt like I was going to furplode.

"David, honey, you need to relax. You said she was working on a project, right? I'm sure she's just busy with it, okay?" Momma said.

I hated when she was right but I also didn't want to worry about my precious Trisha either. I couldn't not worry. I mean the girl just finally agreed to go out with me. What if she had lied and she didn't have a good time?

Mark came in and sat next to me. "How goes it big brother?"

"She still hasn't called. Why hasn't she called?" I said, the panic evident in my voice.

Mark laughed, flipping on the television and turning it to the Discovery Channel.

"She'll call when she's ready. She said she had a good time, right? Acknowledged that you were a great guy?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Then there's nothing to worry about. Just take a few deep breaths and relax," he said, patting me on the back.

I sat back, trying to take in the show on the boob tube.

"What the hell are you watching? The Discovery Channel sucks!" I stated.

Again, my thinker for a brother, "It's really interesting. It's about the changes the city of Paris is making to become more earth-friendly, more green. It's fascinating the new policies they've implemented, Ethan would love it. We could learn something from the French."

I scoffed, "The only thing I've learned from the French is French fries and French kissing, both of which I would marry, if I wasn't going to marry Trisha."

"You are too presumptuous," Mark groaned.

"Is that a good thing?" I had to ask.

"Not really. Why do you think you will marry Trisha?"

"Because she's my imprint. Because I love her."

"A feeling I'm not so sure she reciprocates as of now."

"Okay, dude! Can you quit with the really fucking big words? Just say it, in plain English!"

Mark shook his head, "She doesn't like you like that."

Could he have crushed my heart anymore?

"Gee, thanks, asshole," I said.

"You didn't let me finish. She doesn't like you like that, yet. You're a great catch, David. She'll figure that out," he smiled at me.

Other than the fact that we looked so much alike, my little brother and I didn't have a lot in common, especially recently. I had imprinted on the most perfect being in the world, a perfect being that hated me, no less, and he had come to the realization that he was gay. I have to say that it didn't really bother me all that much. Not like I'm sure some people thought it would. A lot of times people assume I'm just a blundering idiot but I do actually have a heart and I love my brother. We've been together since being in Momma's tummy and nothing could change my love for him.

"Trisha's not like other girls, you know?" I wanted a little advice from him.

"I know. She's smart and caring. She could be perfect for you, David."

It was nice to hear someone else say it. I had said and thought it a gabillion times, but that meant little.

"Thanks," I said. "Now can we watch something with a ball?"

That sounded way dirtier than I meant it to, but Mark just laughed.

"Not what I meant. Try to find some sort of sport for us to watch."

We settled for a college basketball game. I knew it wasn't something that Mark really liked but he'd watch it with me anyway. It was almost half-time when the phone finally rang.

"David, phone!" Momma said from the kitchen.

I picked myself off of the couch and did a little victory dance. Of course, I didn't know if it was her, but it probably was, right?

Okay, now, I have to be cool about this. Don't want her to think I'm a nutjob.

I cleared my throat. "Hello," I said using the sexiest most seductive voice I could.

"Hey, David," the sweet voice said on the other end. It was her. My Trisha, my reason for existence. My everything.

I sound like such a girl.

TRISHA'S POV

I had to muster all my courage to call David. I had to put the plan into action and the best way to do that was to just get it over with. Mom had suggested David come over for dinner and that she would keep my Dad from prodding too much. Since the plan was for my Dad to see things going well with David, it actually seemed like a great idea. I timidly dialed the Uley house and listened as the phone rang a total of two times before I heard Emily's sweet voice on the other end.

"Hello," she said.

"Umh, hi Emily. Is David there?" This is me, trying to play it cool.

"Yes he is. Is this Trisha?"

"Yes. May I speak to him please?"

"Definitely. Hold on just a second."

I heard her tell David he had a phone call and listened as I heard his footsteps on the other end. He cleared his throat before taking the phone. "Hello."

His voice was deep and velvety.

"Hey David," I said.

"Oh, hey Trisha. How are you? I was just about to call you," he said.

"I'm good. My mom wanted me to call and see if you wanted to come over tonight. For dinner. If you want," I semi-stuttered.

He didn't even stop to think before he said, "Of course. That sounds delightful."

Delightful? He must be hanging out with Mark too much. Only Mark was smart enough to use the term "delightful."

"Mom said dinner will be ready at six."

"Shall I bring anything?" Again, must have been Mark's influence. David would have said, "What do you want me to bring?"

"Just yourself," I said. Wow that sounded like a come on.

"Okay. I look forward to a pleasant evening. I shall see you then." Then the phone clicked.

What have I gotten myself into?

I spent the afternoon helping Mom in the kitchen. It was nice to spend some alone time with her, while Dad went over to the Uley house for "pack business." (Nowadays, "pack business" usually meant watching some sporting event complete with beer and no women.)

"What should we make for dessert?" Mom asked.

I looked at the big basket of apples David had brought me for my birthday and smiled. "Why don't we make apple pie?" I asked.

"With David's apples?" she giggled like a school girl.

"I just thought it might be a nice gesture." I really did. I wasn't going to purposely be mean about this whole arrangement. I was going to be myself.

"I think apple pie would be nice," Mom said as she smiled. She turned to the basket of apples and pushed a few towards me with the potato peeler. "You peel."

"Of course!" I said.

Mom shook her head while getting out the flour and butter to make the pie crust. "Ever since you were a little girl, you've love apples. You always used to say they were important to you. I never quite knew why. Do you know why?"

I didn't. I did love apples though. I ate them everyday and even used apple scented shampoo. I didn't know a specific reason why, I just knew I loved them.

"When you were about four, I think, some of the wolf-girls went to this day spa in Seattle and left you kids with your Dads. It was actually hilarious when we told them, because most had never actually spent time alone with their children without the moms around," she said, cutting the cold butter into the flour, while I listened and peeled. "When we got back, I was worried that all of you would have either drowned or all learned to use the word 'fuck.' But, actually, when I got home, you were snug in your bed. The next morning, I asked how your day was and you smiled so big. You said the Daddies had taken you all apple picking and that you spent most of the time on your Daddy's shoulders. He lifted you up to pick apples and told you you were the apple of his eye. You told me that everytime you ate an apple that you would remember that day and how very much he loved you. You have eaten at least one apple a day since then. I guess it must have lost its sentiment for you. But your Dad never forgot exactly why you eat apples."

Her story helped me remember why I was doing this, why I wasn't completely crushing David. It was my Dad's love that kept me from breaking down entirely. If for nothing else, it was worth it to make him happy.

Mom stopped what she was doing and looked me in the eyes. "Even though he has said hurtful things to you, things that no parent should ever say to their child, he did it because he felt like a failure in those moments. Thinking he had done something wrong in raising you. Your father is notorious for his temper, but before the night he found you and Ethan, he had not once ever not calmed just by seeing your face."

I couldn't do anything but smile and peel.

"I know part of why you have decided to see David is because you know it will make your Dad happy. I respect that. But you need to know, Trisha, that your father has loved you more than any mystical force could allow. You are still the apple of his eye."

My Mom is a genius. She saw right through me. I think, in a way, she has an idea what's going on. I don't think she knows the full extent, that I'm seeing Ethan too, but she knows I'm only giving in to David to save my relationship with my Dad. She's reassuring me and helping me know that it is worth fighting for.

"Thanks, Mom. For everything," I said, giving her a smile and putting the apple peelings in the compost bin.

"Goddamn, son-of-a-bitch!" I heard from the front door.

"Daddy's home!" I said.

"What's wrong, Paul?" Mom yelled from the kitchen.

"I lost $20 to Jared on that damn basketball game. I should never have picked the Longhorns to beat the Sooners! Never!" Dad walked into the kitchen with a perplexed look on his face.

I grabbed a whole apple from the basket and put it behind my back. I walked up to him and he smiled down at me.

"Put your hand out and close your eyes, Daddy." I said. He did as I asked and I placed the apple gently in his hand. Then I kissed his cheek. "You can open your eyes now."

He looked down at the apple, then to me, and I could see the misty veil form over his eyes. He leaned down and kissed my forehead. He didn't need to say anything and I didn't need to say anything. We both knew the symbolism that simple apple held, a reminder of simpler times without worry of imprinting, when the only thing that mattered was that I was his little girl and the apple of his eye.

"I guess I should go fire up that grill before David gets here, huh?" Dad said, wiping at his eyes.

I ran to my room to get ready, browsing my closet, trying to find something appropriate to wear. Where was Aunt Nessie when you needed her? I settled on a graphic tee I had with a wolf howling on it, jeans, and my trustee Converse.

DAVID'S POV

This cannot be happening! My damn truck won't start! Are you kidding me?! I'm supposed to be to Trisha's in ten minutes and the damn truck won't fucking start!

"Dad!" I yell, running through the front door.

"God, David, turn the volume down. What's wrong?" Dad asked.

I started pacing. That's what I do when I get nervous. I pace. Now, I wasn't only nervous, I was pissed and trying my damnedest not to phase. "My damn truck won't start!"

"Son, calm down," Dad said. "Emily, where's the keys to the station wagon?"

No fucking way! "The station wagon?! You can't be serious, Dad?"

"What other choice do you have? It's the station wagon or you walk?"

The walking didn't sound so bad, but knowing my luck, it would start pouring down rain about half-way to the Wise house. "Fine. I'll take the damn wagon!"

"David Uley! You need to watch your mouth and your attitude!" Momma said, handing me the keys. "I didn't raise a heathen!"

"Sorry, Momma," I grumbled as I headed for the wagon.

I was at the Wise house in three minutes, remembering the advice Mark gave me about being a little early for my date, as well as suggesting I take flowers for Trisha and her Mom. He was a dating god!

I glanced at myself in the mirror and trotted to the door. From the front window, I could see Trisha setting the table with a smile on her face. For a second, I forgot everything that was going on around me, feeling the steel cables pull my heart to her. I wondered what she would be like as a wife and mother. She would be awesome, I just knew it.

TRISHA'S POV

I bounced around the dining room, setting the table, and helping with any last minute things that needed to be done. I heard the doorbell ring and walked swiftly to answer it.

David stood on the front porch, his back turned to me, looking out at the driveway.

"Stupid ass car," he mumbled. I giggled at him, causing him to turn around. "It's the wagon," he said, shaking his head.

He turned and flashed his signature "David-smile," his pearly whites lighting up the porch. I was a little mesmerized with him for a second, taking in his appearance. He always looked to me a little like a copper-skinned James Deanish-type, with his black leather jacket, white t-shirt, and jeans. The black Converse were all him, though.

He handed me one of the bouquets of flowers in his hands. "Thank you. Gerber Daisies are my favorite," I said taking them and scooting him inside the house.

"David, how are you, son?" Dad asked. _Great_, I thought, _He's already calling him son!_

"Good, Paul. How are you?"

"Better, now that you're here." Dad said.

"Ew, Dad. That's creepy!" I said.

"You are a sick girl. That's not at all what I meant and you know it," Dad said making me blush a little. I knew he was referring to the fact that I had agreed to date David and not that he wanted to date David.

We walked to the kitchen, where he gave Mom the other bouquet of flowers.

"That was so sweet of you, David. You didn't have to do that."

"My Momma didn't raise a fool, Mrs. Wise." Again with the formality.

We sat to dinner and I couldn't help but laugh at watching Dad and David eat. It literally was like watching wolves or lions tear into their prey, very animalistic. I think I might have actually heard David growl once or twice. Even though I had been around the pack my whole life, watching any of them eat, was like a new experience.

After dinner, Mom pulled Dad into the kitchen to get dessert, leaving David and I alone.

"So…" I started.

"You look really nice tonight. I like your shirt. The wolf kind of reminds me of your Uncle Jacob," he said.

"Hmh, I hadn't realized that. Thanks. You look very nice tonight, as well," I said back.

"Did you get that project done?" He asked, as I looked at him a little confused. "For History?"

"Oh, yeah. Yes, I did," I said.

"What was it about?" It was not like David Uley to want to talk about school and I'm sure he could have cared less about women's voting rights in the West. But he seemed genuinely interested so I spilled.

"Women's voting rights. It's about how the western states gave women the right to vote before others."

"Why did they?" Okay, had he serious lost his marbles? Why the hell did he care? Then it hit me. I'm his imprint. He's interested in whatever I'm interested in. It was sweet in a very David-way. I knew he hated school and learning in general, but his eyes lit up when I started in on the reasons why.

"Well, two main reasons. One was that the population in western states was lower and they needed the women to be counted to semi-even it out," I started, watching as his lips pursed and his forehead crinkled. He was thinking about what I was saying. Actually thinking about it, not just nodding in agreement, but taking it in. "Secondly, women in the West had kind of proven themselves, for lack of a better way of saying it. They had gone through the same trials and tribulations that the men had, usually with kids at their feet or babies on their backs." I was really getting fired up about it. I loved this topic and could have gone on for hours. Next to PE, History was always my favorite class.

"That's really interesting," he said. "I think all the social studies teachers must have the same idea. I have to write a paper about a Supreme Court case for Government class."

"You should do _Worcester v. the State of Georgia_. It has to do with tribal sovereignty and the Cherokee Nation," I said. And then I did it. I took it one more step. "I would help you, if you wanted."

His small grin turned into the "David-smile." Hell, I might as well have just told him to fuck me there on the dining room table with my parents in the other room. For him, at this point, with the way I had treated him, it was about the equivalent. I almost ran in the kitchen to tell Mom not to bring out the apple pie. If David knew I had used his apples, that would have set him over the top.

"You really wouldn't mind? I don't really get into the whole research stuff. Mark usually helps me, but if you're volunteering…"

Shit! "Of course, I'll help. I wouldn't ask if I didn't want to." _Yes, I would_, I thought.

"That would be freakin' awesome!"

"Now, I will only help! You have to write the damn thing yourself, but I'll be glad to help research and edit."

I could tell he was about to come unglued. He got out of his chair and ran to my side. My eyes got really big, as he looked like he was about to pounce on me. He did, in a way, pulling me from my chair and giving me a bone-crushing hug. He pulled away and looked at me with his dark eyes.

"Thanks, Trisha. Other than Mark, no one really ever wants to help me with school stuff, ya know. Ethan used to, but, well ya know."

He said his name. Ethan's name. And the sadness in his voice when he said it made this task so much harder.

DAVID'S POV

"So, David, how was your date?" Momma asked. She, Dad, and Mark were lounging around the den watching an old movie.

"Great!" I practically yelled. Deep inside I wanted to twirl around the room, humming like a little girl.

"What'd you guys do?" Dad asked.

"Had dinner and talked."

"What'd you talk about?" Dad, again.

"Women's voting rights."

" Huh?" That would be Dad. "What?" That's Mom, and to complete the trifecta, "Seriously?" Mark says.

"Yes, seriously. She just wrote a paper about women's voting rights in the West. I learned a lot actually. Like, did you know that women were allowed to vote in the West before in other states? And do you know why?"

"Do you?" Mark asked with a hint of doubt in his voice. Sometimes, he could be a real smartass.

To prove that I was not the dummy most people thought I was, I ran through the exact answers that Trisha had given me. I'm pretty sure they were shocked. Hell, I was shocked I remembered them. "And she offered to help me write that paper for Government, about the Supreme Court case thingy. We're doing some case that has to do with Cherokee something or other. OH! I almost forgot! She made apple pie with the apples we bought her. It was beyond yummy! The apples were a big hit, Mom. Thanks for suggesting it."

I say Mom grab Dad's hand and squeeze with a twinkle in her eyes. She was excited. Fuck, I was excited! But I refused to get ahead of myself, like Mark said. I would be patient with her. Wait until the time was right. I knew she was still getting over Ethan and I needed to be the guy to show her the reasons why she should move on. Even if that meant spending hours in the library, if I got to spend them with her, that's all that mattered.

TRISHA'S POV

Before David left, we agreed to meet at the library the next day after school to work on his paper. I waited for Mom and Dad to drift off before I shimmied out the window, on my way to meet Ethan at the beach. It was cold and windy. But Ethan was already there, blanket in hand, wrapping it around me, and pulling me into his warm embrace.

"How'd it go?" He asked. I could tell he really didn't want to know the specifics. He didn't want to think about his girlfriend dating another guy, but he asked and I kept the answer short.

"Good, I guess. I'm helping him with a school project tomorrow. He misses you," I said it all quickly.

"Yeah, well he should have thought about that before he imprinted on my girlfriend," Ethan said. "I know, supposedly, he couldn't help the imprint thing, but he could've left you the hell alone."

I didn't say anything, just snuggled closer to Ethan's bare chest, tracing down with my soft fingertips.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yeah. I just missed you today," I said, leaning up to kiss his chin.

"I missed you too," he said as he leaned down to softly kiss my lips. "I love you so much." He moved his lips to my neck, then down to my collarbone. He moved his lips back to mine and start to kiss softly, then letting the kisses become hungry. Ethan's lips were officially my favorite thing in the world. Every time my lips touched his, I felt the earth move a little. We stayed together like that on the beach for awhile before Ethan decided I needed my rest for school the next day.

"I'll walk you home," Ethan said.

"Don't Dad smell you?" I asked.

"He already knows I patrol out there every so often. He probably won't think it's any different than that."

We walked hand in hand to the house. When we were close, I stopped him. I had been thinking all evening about what this "giving in to David" would entail. I knew David would never push me. He made it clear the night he imprinted on me that everything would be up to me. He would be patient. I wasn't going to ask Ethan's permission, but I wanted him to know, at some point, there would have to be something physical happen for David to believe I was giving in.

"I need to ask you something, Ethan."

"Anything, Ray."

"It's about this whole arrangement. The dating David, sneaking around with you thing."

"Okay. What's on your mind?"

"You know, eventually, he's going to want to get physical."

Ethan nodded. "Here were my thoughts on it. It's up to you."

"What? What do you mean, it's up to me?"

"Exactly that. You have to decide. If you want to kiss him or let him kiss you, I'm not going to be mad."

What the fuck was that supposed to mean? He wasn't going to be mad. He was lying and I could hear it in his voice. He was going to be furious if and when it happened.

"I know you love me. That's all I need to know. If you have to fuck David Uley to make your parents happy, then by all means, have at it," Ethan said, his voice a little sarcastic. "I'm not going to like it or enjoy thinking about it, but it's a necessary evil, right?"

"I suppose," I answered. "Well, no fucking David Uley. What kind of girl do you think I am? You know I love you, only you."

"It was just an example," Ethan said.

Ethan and I said our goodbyes at my window before I crawled in and let sleep come over me.

School was quick the next day and I had a date with David at the library afterwards. David walked up to me while I was putting my books in my locker at the end of the day.

"Hey Trisha!" He said, as I smiled at him. "Umh, do you just want to ride to library with me today?"

"Do you mind?" I asked. I was actually relieved, otherwise my plan was to walk.

"Not at all. As long as you don't mind us dropping Marky-Mark off at home first," David said.

"Why do you have to use such immature nicknames?" Mark asked standing next to his brother.

The Uley boys were quite the pair. They had grown into their wolf bodies well. Both wide and strong and very protective of the other. Imagine my insecurity sitting between the two of them in David's truck on the way to the Uley house. Not only was I sweating from the heat, I feared I might be crushed to death should David make a sharp turn.

"You kids have fun," Mark snickered as he hopped out of the truck.

David shook his head. I debated whether to scoot to the other seat but decided to stay in the middle.

"Are you cold? I can turn the heat up," David asked.

"I'm good. You're kinda warm enough," I said, watching him blush a little. "How has it been since Mark's outing?"

He looked a little confused and then said, "Oh…umh, not really all that different."

I knew that couldn't be so. David was a "man's man." For him, it was all steak, football, and beer (even though he technically was underage). Mark was never completely like that. But he wasn't completely not like that either. He watched intellectual things and thought philosophically about things, but he was strong and almost beautiful to watch when the wolves played a game of pickup-football. I knew a lot of the girls had huge crushes on him and the fact that he was gay was hush-hush among anyone outside of the pack. To hear David say that his brother's sexuality didn't bother him actually kind of made my heart swell a little.

I smiled at him as he said, "I mean, I could get all uptight about it, but he's my bro, you know. I love him and what he chooses to do on his own time doesn't bother me."

"You and your brother have a special bond, don't you?" I knew they did, but I enjoyed listening to David talk about his family so I pushed for more.

David smiled at me, turning into the library, "Other than the twin telepathy thing?"

I looked at him a little confused.

"I'm joking!" He said, giving off a boisterous laugh. I laughed, too.

Helen was waiting for us in the library. I called to let her know we were coming and she had already pulled several reference books for us.

"These are all Supreme Court cases. Those are all specific to _Worcester v. Georgia_. And this one I threw in for you guys, just for fun." Helen had quiet the sense of humor, picking up all the books, including the one she threw in for fun, the _Kama Sutra_.

Both David and I blushed, as I tried to avoid eye contact with him. "Very funny, Aunt Helen," David finally said.

Helen giggled as she walked back to her office. David picked up the _Kama Sutra_ and set on the table next to us. "We'll just put that there for now," he said.

_We'll put that there for-like-ever_, I thought.

We spent the afternoon rummaging through books. I showed him what information he should take notes on. He showed me how to bend a paperclip into a heart, which he told me I could keep. I wasn't totally weirded out by it, either. I put it in my bag and smiled at him. We had Helen make a few copies and agreed we'd meet after school tomorrow at the Uley house to start writing.

He dropped me off at home, hugging me and thanking me for all my help. It wasn't uncomfortable spending time with him, not like I thought it would be. Then, after Mom and Dad went to bed, I snuck out to meet Ethan.

We decided the best meeting place was Grandpa Billy's garage. It sat mostly unused now that Uncle Jake was elsewhere. Grandpa never went out there and he never heard us sneaking around.

"How was your day?" Ethan asked, snuggling me into his chest.

"Good. You?" I asked.

"Well, it just got a hell of a lot better," he said, kissing me softly on the lips.

I literally melted, as we kissed throughout the night, discussing our days and plans for tomorrow. He didn't mention David anymore than necessary, and I didn't really offer any additional information. Then, about three in the morning, he walked me home.

"I love you, Ray. See you tomorrow," Ethan sat, pushing me into the window.

"I love you, too, Ethan." I kissed him one more time before cuddling into my bed.

For the next week, I spent everyday after school at the Uleys' working with David on the project. It was actually pretty fun, and I felt like I was getting practice in for my future career as a teacher. He was always polite, always thanked me. Then, the nights belonged to Ethan.

I felt myself getting closer to David, and actually began thinking of him as a close friend. When the paper was finished and turned in for grading, I kept going over to the Uleys' everyday. I rode to school with him everyday. He listened to me talk about silly things (though never about Ethan), and I listened to him talk about what he had in mind for the future of the pack. David and I ended our days together the same way everyday, him hugging me as I got out of the truck.

One day, in mid-April, I did something very strange, something very unlike me. When he hugged me, I sniffed him. I inhaled his scent. I knew how Ethan smelled and I knew how Ethan said I smelled. All of the wolves I was close to had their own unique scent, something I would smell and then feel them with me. I could smell a Christmas tree and feel Ethan, I could smell autumn leaves and feel Uncle Jake, and the smell of smoldering logs brought the feeling of Dad. I wanted that memory of David. He was my friend. The boy I had hated became probably my closest friend, next to Ethan. And the friendship developed quickly, so I wanted his scent, I selfishly wanted to feel him when he wasn't there, like with the other wolves that were special to me.

"Uh, what are you doing?" David asked, as I sniffed into his chest and he pulled me away.

"Sorry," I said, shyly.

"Were you sniffing me?" he smirked.

"Umh, maybe," I tried to avert his eyes.

"Okay. Why?"

Shit! I was stuck now! How do I respond without sounding like a total psycho?

"All my wolves have special scents. I wanted to know what your's was," I kept looking down.

He pulled me into his chest again. "Go ahead."

So, like a dog, I inhaled his scent. It was so different from the others but I liked it. It was like the sea water and made me think of summer days at the La Push cliffs.

"So, tell me what I smell like."

I pursed my lips trying to think of how to say it. "You smell like the sea."

"I smell like fish? Geez, thanks!"

"No! No! You smell like saltwater. It's a good smell. It's very calming."

"Good to know." Then, he kissed my forehead. I could tell that it was involuntary reaction but he immediately apologized. "I'm so sorry! I don't know what that was about. I'm so so sorry!"

It wasn't really that serious. It wasn't like he groped me but I could tell it bothered him. He tried to be strong and confident most of the time, but this, this was vulnerable David.

"David, it's fine. You're my friend. It doesn't bother me."

"No! I told you I wouldn't push you. I would be patient. That was out of line. Please, please forgive me."

"There's nothing to forgive. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" I tried to ease his tension.

He only nodded and drove off. This wasn't good. Change was in the air. The forehead kiss only the beginning and I knew it.

The next day David and I drove to Port Angeles. We had dinner and then walked through town. It wasn't a date, just two friends hanging out. David offered me his hand and I took it, intertwining our fingers. It should have felt wrong. It did to some extent. But I didn't pull away. Our hands stayed together until we got to my house and he let go, pulling a sack from under his seat.

"I got you something. It's a Thank You present for helping me with my paper. I got it from the bookstore in Port Angeles." He handed me the package with a smile on his face. "I got an A by the way, on the paper."

"Congrats, David! Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I was thrilled!

"I was afraid you wouldn't want to hang out with me anymore." He said, looking down.

His voice sounded a little sad, and in turn, I felt guilty.

"Why would you think that?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I thought maybe I was like your special project and when the paper was done and finished, you'd move on."

I moved closer to him. "David, you're my friend. I wouldn't ever do that."

More guilt. Only this time, guilt about everything. Guilt about what this was going to do to David, guilt about what this was doing to Ethan. Guilt that I was using my Grandpa's garage as my own personal love shack.

"Open your gift," David said, bringing me out of my daze.

I pulled the book out of the sack and looked at the cover: _Women Who Dared: Early Suffragettes in America_.

"I thought of you as soon as I saw it," he said sweetly. "It reminded me of that night we had dinner at your house."

My emotions went into overdrive. I was so touched first that he even got me a gift, then that it was such a personal one. The guilt still there, as my eyes welled with tears.

I looked up at David, who was right beside me. He had the typical "David-smile" that melted my heart. "Thank you, David. This is so sweet. You have no idea…I love it."

I don't think either of us meant for it to happen but it did. He pulled me in for a hug but his eyes said he wanted more. Me, being Trisha, not wanting to hurt him, gave it to him. He leaned down, wrapping his arms around me, and instead of putting my head in his chest like I normally do, I kept eye contact. He moved very slowly, continuing to lean in, until his lips very delicately touched mine. I was amazed at how soft and sweet this huge, bear of a man's kiss was. Well, or at least as soft and sweet as it started out. The kiss became a little more intense, as he turned more towards me. He pressed his tongue to my lips, licking slightly. Damn, I couldn't help myself. I let him slip his tongue in, and quite honestly, it was delectable. He pushed me into the passenger side door, kissing me deeply, moving his hands up my sides, reaching for my breasts.

_HONK! HONK! HONK!_

He pulled off of me quickly to see my Dad, Collin, and Embry pulling into the driveway in Dad's car.

"Oh, fuck!" David said.

"Uh…uh…" Now I was the one with tongue paralysis.

"Oh, God, Trisha! Shit! What've I done?" David stroked my hair.

I still couldn't say anything. He heard the Dad and the wolves coming up to the truck window.

"What are you two doing in there?" Dad asked, chuckling.

I couldn't look at David. I couldn't move. Dad pulled open the truck door, spilling me out onto the ground, Dad and the wolves laughing harder.

Now, not only did I just makeout with my friend, my Dad caught us. And, while at the time, it seemed like a good idea, I shouldn't have done it. Fuck! I was leading David on.

"Trisha, wait," David said, sounding like I had just told him his puppy died.

I picked up my bag and my book, not looking David, running to the front door.

This was bad…this was really, really bad…and it was only going to get worse.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Summer in the Wolves' Den"

**Another AN: I know, you hate the AN's but sometimes they're a necessary evil, like Ethan says, right? So the Longhorns=University of Texas and the Sooner=University of Oklahoma. **


	12. Summer in the Wolves' Den

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**I do, however, own the following statement made by me after seeing the **_**New Moon**_** wolf pack, shirtless:**

_***Me: "Holy Mother of God! I think I just had an orgasm looking at the picture!"**_

**Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! You guys are awesome! It literally makes my day to see reviews! **

**Don't forget to show some love to yay4shanghai, as well as another of my faves KupKakes09! **

****************************************************************************

Chapter 11: "Summer in the Wolves' Den"

TRISHA'S POV

"Good morning, boys," I called, walking up to the Uley truck.

"Hey, Trisha," Mark said. David didn't look at me. He kept his head forward and said, "Hi."

Well, this was awkward. I didn't see why David was so upset. He wasn't the one that was fondled and groped and then had to tell his boyfriend about it, much to his boyfriend's chagrin. I have to admit that when I told Ethan, I left out the part where I totally let him kiss me. I mean, why not? I was already going to Hell it seemed, with my web of lies.

Mark started to hop out to let me sit in the middle when David interrupted him. "For fucks sake, Mark, just scoot over."

That stung. And it pissed me off. "Actually," I said, slamming the door without getting in, "I'll just walk."

I saw Mark look at David, who kept his eyes forward. Then Mark looked at me and got out of the truck.

"Hey. Wait up!" Mark called after me.

Why was I crying? Oh, I know, because I was a total bitch taking advantage of one of the kindest boys on the rez and then selfishly making out with his ex-best friend in my Grandfather's garage in the middle of the night.

"Trisha, are you okay?" Mark asked, grabbing my wrist and spinning me to look at him.

"No, I am not fucking okay!" I screamed at him.

Mark looked utterly confused. "What the hell happened? He's been in a pissy mood since he came home last night."

"We made out last night! And now he's pissed at me, and I don't know what I did or what I should do!" I was not only crying, I was sobbing. Sobbing for my friendship that was probably over and thinking of all the betrayal.

Mark grabbed my shoulders. "You listen here. I don't know what's going on with him but I guarantee you I will find out."

I avoided David and the rest of the wolves at school. I ate lunch alone in the quad.

"Greetings, Trisha Wise," Mark said, coming up behind me as I ate my yogurt.

"Salutations to you as well, Mr. Uley," I responded.

He laughed at me. "I think we're both too smart for our own good."

I nodded.

"I talked to David," he said, sitting next to me. "He's not mad at you. He's embarrassed."

"What does he have to be embarrassed about? It wasn't his Dad that caught us."

"He's not embarrassed about that. He feels like he pressured you. He said he pushed you pretty hard into the door. He worried he hurt you and then he worries he's ruined everything he's worked so hard to build with you," Mark stated. "He would never hurt you, Trisha. You have to know that."

But I **would** hurt him. I knew inevitably I was going to crush him. I was selfish though. I had learned to need him, to want him in his own right. Not like I wanted or needed Ethan. I needed Ethan like oxygen. David was like coffee. I might survive without it but it would make the day hell and I would be a total bitch to everyone around me.

"Another thing. He said he was worried you might have felt something last night," Mark said.

"Like romantically?" I asked.

"No, like a certain part," Mark smirked.

"What the hell are you talking about Mark?"

"You know, he said when he was kissing you, he got 'excited.'"

I knew what he was talking about now, but I wanted to hear Mark say it. "How so?"

"Dear God, Trisha, don't make me say it." He was begging now and I was trying to keep from laughing.

"Mark Uley, I have no idea what you could possibly be talking about."

Mark huffed, "Fuck this! He had a boner, a hard-on, an erection! He came home and spent an hour in the bathroom, jacking off with you in mind, I'm sure."

Now I was a little embarrassed. My eyes got wide. "Where is he?" I asked.

"In the cafeteria. Why?" Mark asked.

"I need to talk to him," I said standing up, making my way to the door. Mark was close behind me.

"Please don't tell him I told you about the boner thing. It would kill him," Mark begged, again.

"I'm not saying anything about it. Just chill, okay?"

It was never hard to spot the wolves in the cafeteria, being a group of six-foot plus Native boys that looked like they were on steroids. They were laughing. I'm not sure what about but it was boisterous and loud. I walked up to them, seeing David at the head of the table.

"David, we need to talk." I tried to use my most assertive voice.

He still wouldn't look at me. "Not now, Trisha."

"Fuck, yes, now!" I grabbed his arm, surprising him and pulling him up and through the door to the quad. I kept pulling him until we got to a fairly isolated area. I was shocked I was able to move him even an inch, weighing as much as he did, but it was almost like he wanted to talk, he just didn't know what to say.

"What the hell is wrong with you, David Uley?!" I demanded.

He still wouldn't look me in the eyes. So I stood on my tiptoes and forced his neck forward to look at me. "Just tell me what I did, David, so I can fix it."

"You didn't do anything," he said, finally looking at me. "I just got scared, Trisha. I don't want you to hate me. I don't want you to be scared of me."

I shook my head, "Why would I be scared?"

"You didn't notice? When I kissed you, it started out simple, but then I felt it. I felt the wolf in me want more. I felt the wolf in me want my mate," he trailed off.

When we kissed, I didn't feel any of that. I knew the kiss was nice and that, though it started innocent, it had progressed into something more—but it was still just a kiss. Even his hands moving on me like they did, didn't seem too much. How had I missed the urgency in his actions?

"If your Dad hadn't shown up, I would have taken you right there in the truck. You couldn't fight me and I would have marked you as mine," David said, with disappointment in this voice. I didn't know if the disappointment was because he had failed at his task or that he was appalled at himself.

"David, I honestly didn't feel anything like that," I said. "I promise. I would've told you. I wouldn't have let you hurt me."

He shook his head at me. "You wouldn't be able to stop me."

No, but Ethan could have. Even though he didn't follow us anymore, he was never too far away. It would have just taken a scream to get him to me in a matter of seconds. I obviously couldn't tell David that.

"I don't think I can be around you for a few days," David said.

"Why?"

"Your scent right now is just too much."

"I'm confused. Why all of the sudden does my scent bother you?"

He crinkled his nose and then shook his head. "I can't say it."

"What? I need to know, David. I want this to be better. I don't like you treating me like this." Yes, I am a hypocrite.

"When I got home last night, I asked my Dad why I reacted like that. He said basically it boils down to that… you're in heat."

"Excuse me?" What did he just say? I'm in heat?

"Not like with a dog. It's just that your body right now, it like calls to me. You smell…fertile."

I had to think about that. This was the reproductive part of the imprint, the part where I was supposed to give him little baby wolves to carry on the wolf gene. This was the part I was avoiding.

"If we hadn't gotten caught and I finished what I started…"

"I would have gotten pregnant?" I understood what he was telling me. In the scientific terms he wouldn't use, this was the time when conception was most likely.

He nodded, "probably."

He thought for a minute, then motioned for me to sit on the grass. I did and he plopped down next to me. "I couldn't do that to you, Trisha. As much as I want you, as much as want you to be mine, I won't make it on anyone's terms but yours'."

Why did he always have to make me feel guiltier? I was grateful for his patience and understanding. Conversely, it was making my web of lies that much harder. But I had to keep going. I couldn't lose his friendship just because he thought he had screwed up.

"Alright. Here's a solution to this problem. How long does this 'heat' last?" I asked.

"Dad said about two days. It should probably be gone by tomorrow," he said.

I laughed at that, the thought of him "smelling" me. "Here's the deal. Whenever it happens again, just tell me. I'll stay away from you for a day or two. I won't tempt you."

He nodded at me and gave me a "David-smile."

"Still friends?" I asked.

"As long as you want," he said, keeping the smile.

I stayed away from him the rest of the day and went straight home after school, did my homework, and spent the usual evening watching TV and counting down the hours to see Ethan.

When we finally met at Grandpa's, I knew I had to tell Ethan about what had happened with David. I told him the night before about the kiss, but the new development of my scent was something I was curious about. I had spent most of last night with him and he never mentioned anything. Why? Was it because he just didn't want to say anything or was it because it didn't effect him the way it did my imprint?

"So what you're telling me is that David was about to rape you in his truck, and yet, you're not really phased by that?" Ethan asked me.

I rolled my eyes. "He would never have hurt me, Ethan. You know that. It was just a repressed animal instinct that for some reason decided to emerge at that moment. It's fine."

Ethan started pacing in the garage. "I don't like this, Ray. I think maybe you should stop seeing him. I can't let him hurt you. No, let me rephrase that, I won't let him hurt you."

"Would you come sit with me and listen for just a minute?" I demanded, trying to sound authoritative.

He scoffed over to me and sat down next to me on the Chevy van seat. I moved so that I was straddling his lap and placed a soft kiss on his lips. I held his face in my hands, looking him in the eyes.

"Ethan, he won't hurt me. You know that. If he did, he wouldn't be able to live with himself," I whispered before moving in to kiss him again.

"Please be careful. He's strong and he could easily hurt you. I'm only asking you don't put yourself in anymore danger than absolutely necessary," he whispered back to me.

"I promise," I sighed.

The rest of the school year flew by and before long it was the last day of school. Riding home with David and Mark, I worried what the summer might bring. Would I continue the current path I was on of spending days with David and nights with Ethan? Would David be too busy to see me? As odd as it was, I couldn't think about not seeing David everyday. Or Mark really for that matter. I had taken to thinking of Mark as a big brother. He watched over me and was generally the one to tell me when I had to stay away from David for a day or two because my scent was distracting him.

I got out of the truck and turned around to wave good bye. David walked around to meet me.

"Trisha, you want to go to dinner tonight? You know, celebrate the end of the school year. It would just be you and I, but I promise it's not a date!"

I laughed. "That sounds great. What time do you want to pick me up?"

"How about 6:00?

"Okay, David, I'll see you then."

It was only two hours later and David was at my door. He looked rather dashing, his hair slightly more styled than usual. We drove to a diner in Forks for dinner and, as always, he was a perfect gentleman. It would have made this all a lot easier if he weren't, if I had a reason to hate him. He held my hand in the truck and I sat right next to him. After dinner, we drove to the cliffs.

"Don't you just love the stars?" I asked, looking up to the sky.

He chuckled, "I guess."

"You know, some cultures believe that each star is a family member looking down on them," I said, with my head still turned to the sky. "Sometimes I like to try and see if I can find which one is my grandmother, Sarah."

He put his arm around my shoulder. "Isn't it funny how we can love people we've never met so much," David said, philosophically.

I smiled at him. "I've always thought, that when I have a daughter, I want to name her Sarah."

I hadn't realized what I'd said or what that would mean to David. He caught it though.

"I think Sarah is a beautiful name. Perfect for our, er, I mean your daughter," David said, stumbling over the last part.

I giggled, trying to ignore the slip.

"Trisha, what you got planned for the summer?" David asked.

"Not much. Just going to do some reading, work on my car, maybe spend sometime at the beach."

"You have a car? Why do I not know this?" David asked, slightly offended.

"I got it for my birthday. It's not really a car, per se, really more like the frame of a car. My Dad and a couple of the guys are supposed to help. It's basically like starting from scratch," I said.

"Can I help?" David asked. "I'm pretty into cars."

I smiled at him, "That would be really nice, David. I was worried you wouldn't want to hang out with me anymore."

He shook his head. "Why in the world would you think that?"

"I don't know. It's just harder without school to give us a reason to see one another."

We sat quiet for a minute before he spoke. "I promise, I will see you everyday this summer. Us younger wolves are going to be running patrols a lot more during the summer, but I want to spend as much time as I can with you."

I kissed his cheek, hoping he wouldn't take that as an invitation for more. He didn't though. He just pulled me closer to him. We sat there looking at the stars and listening to the waves. I must have fallen asleep. When I woke, I was in my bed, with a note next to me. It was written in very rough penmanship and read:

_Trisha-_

_I'll be here to pick you up at 11:00._

_We can get started on that car._

_David_

It was really simple, but held so much sweetness, just like David. I rolled over to see the clock. It was one in the morning. I knew I needed to see Ethan. I crawled out the window only to find him standing right there.

"Fuck, Ethan! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?!" I whispered, very harshly and loud.

"Sor-ry. I got worried and then I came back here and saw you were asleep. Everything okay?" He asked.

I nodded, grabbing his hand and pulling him just a little away from the house, trying to get away from Dad's superhuman hearing.

"It's fine," I whispered.

"How was the date?" he asked. I knew this was killing him. The fact that another boy could take _his_ soulmate on actual dates while he and I were restricted to Grandpa's garage.

"Good. We talked, mostly. He's going to help me work on the car this summer," I said, a little too proudly.

Ethan laughed. "He was always good with cars." He turned me back towards the house. "It's late. I want you to get some rest and I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Ethan," I said he hoisted me in the window.

"Yes, babe?"

"I love you. And I promise one day things will get to be normal with us." I leaned down to kiss him. The scene mimicked a Romeo-and-Juliet-esque type romance, minus a balcony. He, Ethan, was my Romeo, and our love was definitely forbidden.

He put my face in his hands and kissed me harder. "I love you too, my beautiful Ray of sunshine."

I crawled in my bed and closed my eyes. I ran my tongue along my lips, hoping to taste Ethan still there. I drifted off to sleep, waking up early the next morning.

Mom and Dad were fast asleep, Dad snoring so loud I wondered how anyone in this county could sleep. I giggled walking to the kitchen. I ran the sink, grabbing a glass and taking a drink of water. I looked out the window above the sink and saw a huge wolf moving in the woods behind the house.

"Who is that?" I asked myself, not realizing I was saying it out loud.

"It's David," Dad said from behind me. "He's patrolling this morning. I don't know why he's all the way out here. His areas a little further west."

The wolf wasn't really doing anything. Just moving around. It looked like he was trying to scratch something but couldn't reach it. It was pretty comical to watch.

"What's he doing?" I asked.

Dad moved next to me and started laughing. "Looks like he has an itch."

I felt bad. David was moving around in a circle trying to reach that annoying itch that just seemed to be too hard to find. I wanted to help him.

"Will he hurt me, Dad?" I asked.

Dad shook his head. "No. You want me to stand at the door just to be safe?"

"Yes, please."

I walked out the backdoor, wearing only my thin nightgown. "David?"

He turned to look at me, still trying to get that itch. I giggled at him as he walked to me. He whimpered a little.

"Where does it itch?" I said leaning down to him. I moved my hands across his fur, finding a spot behind his front leg. I scratched him, as his whimpering stopped and his mouth moved into a smile. His wolf-smile was as endearing as his "David-smile." "Better?" I asked.

He nodded his head and then licked my face. "Eww…"

He whined and then walked off.

"Stay there! He's phasing back!" Dad yelled from the door.

I heard the rustle in the woods and then watched as a shirtless David walked out. Holy Mother! He was freakin' hot! I had seen him many, many times and never given his body a second thought. But this David, the one in front of me, complete with no shirt and shorts that sat low on his waist, showing the V that moved towards his happy place, overwhelmed me. I took a deep breath.

"Hey," he said. "Thanks! I've been trying to scratch that all morning." Then he kissed my cheek and ran back to the woods.

I couldn't move. I just stood there watching him walk away. _Not good…need to stop…think about something else…Bill Clinton naked... _It worked. Sexy David all out of my mind. Shit! Ugh!

It took everything to keep from blushing when he picked me up to work on the car. I couldn't look him in the eyes. He looked different completely clothed, but everytime I looked at him, I saw his naked chest from earlier and had to think of some past US Presidents naked just for that memory to fade.

We climbed in the truck and headed to Grandpa Billy's. Ironically, I would be spending the afternoon with my imprint in the same garage I used as a loveshack with Ethan.

"Tell me about this car." David said.

"Well, it basically needs a new engine and stuff that goes under the hood."

He laughed at me. "Stuff that goes under the hood?"

"Sorry. I know absolutely nothing about cars. Uncle Jake tried to teach me how to change a tire one time. I lasted about ten minutes and then got bored," I said smiling.

We pulled up to Grandpa's, as it started to rain. We ran into the garage. I flipped on the light, showing my rusty frame of a car.

David whistled, "Nice."

"It has potential. What do you think?"

He looked it over a little, popped the hood, moved some stuff around.

"Do you have a piece of paper?" He asked.

I looked through my bag to find one and handed it to him. He started writing on it, using words that were foreign to me. I must have looked confused to him, because he looked at me and laughed.

"Don't hurt yourself, I'm just listing the parts we'll need to get this baby running."

He spent about an hour looking the car over, writing something down every now and then. I sat on the van seat. I wasn't bored, though. It was quite amusing watching him. I imagine it was what I looked like to him when I had my nose in a book.

"Okay. I think I got everything," he said. "Let's go back to my house for lunch and then head in to Forks to check on some of these parts. What'd ya say?"

"Sounds good," he said, putting his hand out for me. I took it and we walked, our fingers intertwined to the truck.

The Uley house was busy. Both Sam and Emily were home, Emily in the kitchen, not seeming like herself, wringing her hands. She was normally very peppy and welcoming but she didn't seem to notice us today.

"Buenos dias, Trisha," Mark said, as he trotted into the kitchen.

"Merhaba, Mark," I replied.

"What the hell are you two saying?" David asked.

Mark started to explain, but I stopped him. "He said 'good day' in Spanish and then I said 'hello' in Arabic."

David shook his head at us, as Sam walked in. "Oh, good, you're all here. Why don't you guys have a seat?" Sam said, pointing to the kitchen table.

We all three sat down at the table as Sam pulled Emily over with him, sitting her in his lap. I felt David tense a little beside me and glance at Mark, who shrugged his shoulders.

"Well, kids, we have some exciting news," Sam said. Emily didn't look at me or her sons. It was quiet for a minute.

"What's the good news?" Mark asked.

Sam cleared his throat, pulling Emily into him. "Before I tell you, you two have to promise you won't get mad or upset. This is good news."

"Umh, are you sure I should be here? I'm not really family," I was confused about what was going on and a little frightened by Emily's demeanor.

"Please stay, Trisha. You'll be part of the family eventually," Emily said. She seemed so out of it, I didn't even have the audacity to argue with her.

"Dad, you're scaring us. What's going on?" David asked.

Emily looked at us, "My beautiful boys…I love you so much. Please don't be angry. I'm pregnant."

Wow! I did not see that coming! Apparently neither did David. He grabbed my hand quickly. I looked at his face. He didn't seem mad or angry but instead he looked terrified. I moved my head to meet his gaze and smiled at him, assuring him it was going to be okay.

He shook his head and made a sour face. "Eww…you two still have sex? That's disgusting!"

Everyone laughed and Emily moved to David to kiss him on the cheek. "You know I love you boys. I know you will be excellent big brothers." She kissed Mark's cheek and came towards me, pulling me into a hug. She whispered, "This will be you one day."

I couldn't help but clench my legs together at that comment. At least she didn't say it would be me and David someday. She left the father of my future children up for debate.

Mark and David both congratulated their parents. I did too and then headed home to spread the gossip. Mom was little pissed when I told her what Emily had said to me. "She's does realize that women can do other things than just sit around, make babies, and incubate, right?"

Mom always tried to play the part of the independent woman, and she was, but inside it ate her up that she only had one child. She and Dad wanted more. They tried for years, but I was the only product of their attempts. That also didn't mean that they didn't still continuously have sex. Whereas David was shocked his parents still did it, I unfortunately could give exact dates of when my parents **didn't** do it, because chances are, it was quiet and I didn't have to sleep with headphones in my ears in order to drown out the possibility of nightmares.

Ethan was also pissed about Emily's comment. "Who the fuck does she think she is talking to you about that?"

"Sweetie, she didn't say whose baby I was going to have, just that I would have babies someday," I said, trying to rationalize the comment.

I felt increasingly guilty towards Ethan. I had been spending so much time with David that I was generally worn out when it was Ethan's turn. I tried not to share too much about my time with David because, at times, it rightfully made Ethan upset to hear about our dates and fun things we did together. The car became a bonding experience for David and I. It also became a source of jealousy for Ethan, and rightfully so.

I spent most of the rest of the summer in one of two places: the garage (during the day with David and then at night with Ethan) or at the Uley's. I liked to think of it as my own personal summer in the wolves' den.

When Emily announced her pregnancy, she was about 12 weeks along, shooting for a December delivery. She started having problems about the 13th week and was put on bedrest. David and I compromised, though it didn't take much arguing, that he would work on my car, while I stayed to help care for his "Momma," as he called her.

I sat with her during the day, reading mostly, while she did things like watch TV with her feet up. I made her lunch everyday and we talked. I hadn't given much thought to pregnancy and children before. And everything was so complicated now that thinking about it hurt a little. My curiosity got the better of me one afternoon in early August, the week before school started back.

"What's it like?" I asked. Emily looked up at me.

"What's what like, Trisha?" I hate when people respond to questions with a question. In all fairness, I probably should have phrased the question a little more specifically.

"Being pregnant," I said. She opened her mouth to answer, but I cut her off, "Are you scared? Does it hurt? Can you feel the baby move already? Do you want a boy or a girl?"

Emily looked a little stunned and laughed at me. "Slow down, girl! What was the first question?"

"Are you scared?"

She pursed her lips. "I would be lying if I said no. When I was pregnant with the boys, everything was different because I was younger and there were two of them. This time, my age is a factor." She thought for a minute. "I'm not scared for myself, so much as for the baby. I know it wasn't planned, but I'm happy about it all the same. I love it so much and can't wait to hold my precious little one in my arms." She rubbed her abdomen, soothing the little baby bump that had formed. Her answer made me smile and she noticed the change.

"Now don't you go thinking about having any babies anytime soon, Trisha. I'm not ready to be a grandmother!" I couldn't let it go this time.

"What makes you so sure I'd have your grandchildren?" I asked, with a bit of curtness in my tone.

She patted the bed, requesting me to sit next to her. I did, though I was not happy about it.

"I know you're fighting this imprint. But you have to know that David will do anything to be your everything. You don't see him romantically entirely yet. He knows that. You need a friend, so that's what he is. You're giving in to it and you don't even know it." If the woman wasn't pregnant, I probably would've slapped her across the face. How dare she presume to know what I thought or how I felt? But then I felt uneasy. Maybe it wasn't me that had lead David on? Maybe he was leading me on? I knew he wanted more than just friendship, eventually. Now, though, I thought he was only my friend because of the imprint, only because he knew that was the way to my heart, not because he genuinely liked me. The longer I thought about it, the angrier I became.

"I have to go," I said very bluntly to Emily.

"Trisha, wait. I didn't mean…" Her voice faded as I walked out the door.

I walked down the road a ways before I saw David's truck coming towards me. He stopped next to me, but I kept walking.

"What happened?" David asked. "Momma just called me and she sounded very upset." Then he said it. "What did you do?" Me? What did I do?

"What did _I_ do? Oh, yes, this is all about me isn't it? It couldn't possibly that you're Momma could have said anything to hurt me!"

He stopped the truck and got out. "What happened, Trisha?"

I stopped too, turning to look him in the eyes. "Why are you my friend, David? Huh? Is it because I'm a cool person and you want to hang out with me? Or is it because you have some archaic idea about what our friendship will lead to?"

"What?! What the hell are you talking about, Trisha?" He was confused. Hell, I was confused. I knew I was making this a bigger deal than it was, but I had given up my personal time with Ethan for months because I thought David really wanted to be my friend, not that he just wanted to win me over.

"You! You are what I'm talking about! You are only my friend because of the imprint! You hated me growing up! You were the meanest person in the world to me. Even we were first teenagers, you pushed Ethan away from me! And I hope you're happy because you've done it again!" I spun around to walk away, but he grabbed my wrist, spinning me back to face him.

He pushed me against the door of the truck and crushed his lips to mine. I should have fought him off, punched him, but the kiss…it was so passionate and loving, I couldn't bring myself to do anything but give in. Our tongues battled again and his hands roamed. He moved his hands under my shirt and my bra, squeezing my breast. I couldn't help but moan at the sensation it was causing throughout my whole body. I wrapped my legs around his waist and felt his hard on push into me. I had to stop this. I pushed him, hard, to break the kiss.

He put me down and looked at me. David felt guilty again. I could see it in his eyes.

"Trisha, I've always wanted to be your friend. I started out only thinking about the imprint but I like you as a person. Please don't walk away from me," he was basically begging.

"We can't kiss anymore, David. Friends don't kiss. It's just not a good idea," I said.

"If that's what it takes to be your friend, than you know I agree."

He walked up to me and put his hand out. "Let's shake on it," he said.

I laughed and shook his hand. "Do you want to punch me for good measure?" He asked.

"I think I'm good," I said smiling.

"Good. Now get in the truck so I can take you back to the house and Momma can apologize," David said, scooping me up and putting me in the truck.

And that's how the summer ended. Two weeks later school started and things went back to normal. It was nice though to look at how all the relationships around me had changed over the three months of summer. David and I were closer friends, he was getting ready to be a big brother again, and I still had Ethan. Everything had to be right in the world. Right?

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*NEXT CHAPTER: "Let's Talk About Sex"


	13. Let's Talk About Sex

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! You guys are awesome! It literally makes my day to see reviews! I love hearing your theories on what you think will happen! **

**Very, very special thanks to yay4shanghai for being the most awesome beta ever and to KupKakes09 for help with the lemon and for her general coolness. Don't forget to show them some love!**

**Yay4shanghai has written a companion chapter of **_**A Fun and Easy Way to Go Down a Dress Size**_** for Trisha's talk with the wolf-girls about sex, and Trisha and Ethan are mentioned in the most recent chapter of **_**Once the Earth Settled**_**. Check them out…immediately!**

**WARNING: There is a lemon in this chapter. Yep, you heard me, a lemon. So if you are offended by that, turn back now.**

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Chapter 12: "Let's Talk About Sex"

TRISHA'S POV

When school started in August, it was a relief to actually have several classes with David. We sat together and I kept tutoring him. Our previous arrangement regarding my car was still intact. I spent most days after school with Emily, while David worked on the car. I liked spending time with Emily. She didn't pressure me anymore and I loved being so close to the baby growing inside of her.

Evenings with Ethan were even more amazing and slowly things between us got more physical. Nothing past kissing and groping, but I loved every minute I got to spend with him and longed for the day we could be together and not have to worry.

One night in early November, I started to think more of our arrangement. I was tired of sneaking around. And as much as I loved my friendship with David, I loved Ethan.

"What are you thinking, Ray?" Ethan asked, kissing me softly on the tip of my nose.

"It will be the holidays soon. I just wish…I wish we could spend them together, without anyone else. Just you and me," I said.

He held me tighter to him. "Someday, I promise," he said.

"You promise?" I asked, turning to snuggle my head into his neck.

When we weren't kissing or touching, we just laid with each other. And right now I could practically hear the wheels in his head turning.

"Ray, baby, can I ask you something?" Ethan said.

"Always," I said raising up to kiss him softly on his lips.

"If things don't get better, if we're stuck like this," he pulled my eyes to look at him, "should we leave?"

I furrowed my eyes, a little confused. "What do you mean?"

"If it doesn't get better, I want to get away from La Push. I want us to go as far as we can. Together. Away from all this damn wolf stuff," he said, forcefully.

That was it. The only way it would work. "Only as a last resort," I said.

He nodded. "Only as a last resort." Then he kissed me and walked me home. God the things I would have given to make this all okay.

As always, our late night rendezvous ended with a far too passionate kiss, his hands ending up in between my legs, my hand around his erection. I knew it was coming. I wanted him, in a Biblical sense. Every part of him. As anxious as I was for it, I was also freaking out about exactly how it all worked. Not the mechanics of the act, but the adaptations that had to be made for sex with the wolves.

I got lucky when some of the newer wolf-girls (the Momma-wolves either pregnant or feeling too old to do it) decided to reel me in for "the talk." Helen, Claire and Leticia were given the task, after my Mom begged them to apparently. I think they all assumed it was only a matter of time before David and I consummated our imprintation. Though, my concerns with sex lie with someone else. I learned that I needed to drink lots of water, which is why I carried a water bottle everywhere I went and sucked down more than eight glasses a day, just in case. I also knew, from experience, that it could get hot, literally. The temperature could become a problem.

By mid-December the wolf-girls were abuzz with the impending birth of Emily's baby. Sam and Emily had chosen not to find out the sex of the baby and it drove David absolutely insane. It was interesting to see how he reacted to every little thing going on in the house. He was constantly concerned about Emily, and when the call came that she was in labor and we were at school, he drove like a bat out of hell to make it to Forks in time for the delivery.

David was the third person to hold his baby sister, Jesse. He and Mark were the sweetest big brothers and I feared for the poor girl's future suitors. The smile on his face as he held her close to his chest was more than just a "David-smile." She was a beautiful baby, with a copper tone to her skin, alluring grey eyes, and a full head of matted black hair, and it was clear she was already in love with her big brothers.

I was the fifth person to hold little Jesse. She fussed when Sam took her from Emily but then calmed the moment he put her in my arms. I concluded that Jesse must have memories of my voice from all the time I spent with Emily while she was pregnant. It was a lofty idea but it meant something to me, and when I mentioned it to David, I could tell it meant something to him. Holding a baby that close made me think about my own future family. I knew that I wanted to have a family with Ethan.

Ethan…I wished he could be here right now. He loves children, especially babies and he would have loved this little angel. I needed to see him.

After visiting Emily and the baby, I ran to Ethan's, hoping he would be there. I tried to be calm at the door, knowing there was a possibility he might not be there.

"Ray! I thought we weren't meeting until later. Is everything okay?" Ethan asked, answering the door, sans shirt.

"Everything is fine. Is anyone else here?" I asked.

"Seth just left. It's just you and me, babe."

I calmly walked in the door, as Ethan closed it behind me. I jumped on him, grabbing a hold of his neck, crushing my lips to him, and wrapping my legs around his waist. He walked us to his bedroom, throwing me on the bed. I scooted up to the pillows while I kicked my shoes off and watched as Ethan kept his eyes on me. He smirked, never a good sign. Crawling up the bed, he pushed his lips to mine.

Our mouths moved together and our tongues battled one another for dominance. He ran his hands up my thighs, underneath my skirt, slipping his fingers into my panties, causing me to gasp. He rubbed his fingers across my already sensitive nub while his other hand unbuttoned my blouse. He moved both hands to my breast, then moved his mouth to kiss the top of each mound. Before I knew it, my shirt was on the floor, my bra was hanging from the ceiling fan, and my skirt was ripped in half on the bed. All that was left was me and my hot pink panties. He pulled himself off the bed to stand in front of me. I bit my bottom lip, nervously, as he pulled down his sweatpants, revealing all of himself. I had seen him naked like this before. Hell, I'd even practically humped him with him this naked before. But his body was like a rare work of art that still amazes you every time you see it. And the things it did to me…I could immediately feel the wetness at my core building. _Oh, fuck…_

Ethan moved back towards me and began kissing my breasts again, as I softly moaned his name. I could feel him smirking on my skin, as he moved farther south, kissing and touching every part of me in his reach. He crawled in between my legs. The only thing separating us was the flimsy cotton of my panties. He moved his hands to my hips, still kissing my lips, and sliding a finger under the elastic band of my panties. He pulled at them, moving them down and off, lifting himself off of me. He threw them aside.

"Ethan…" I moaned.

He returned to kiss me on the lips. I could feel him there at my entrance. I wanted him in me. I needed it. "Please, Ethan, just do it," I whimpered.

I could feel him panting and breathing heavily. I closed my eyes, waiting for him to push into me, scared but longing at the same time. He pulled away from me. I felt the bed shift as he got up and searched for his sweatpants.

What had I done? I thought for sure he wanted me, too. How could I have been wrong about that?

"I'm sorry, Trisha. I can't, I won't," he said.

"Okay, I'm thoroughly confused. Why did you get me naked and push me on the bed if you had no intention of making love to me?" I asked. I think he heard the hurt and confusion in my voice.

He paced again. "No, it's not that. It's not that I don't want to."

"Then what the hell is it, Ethan?!" I was frustrated now, tears starting to roll down my cheeks as the feeling of rejection set in.

He didn't say anything, just kept pacing. I got off the bed, pulling my clothes back on. "Fuck, you ripped my damn skirt! What am I going to do now?!" I screamed at him, sobbing.

He moved to grab my arm but I jerked away. "Ray, please don't go."

"Shut up, Ethan! Just leave me alone." I could see in his eyes that just by yelling at him like that, that I had hurt him.

"Yeah, just leave! Run to David! He'll be more than happy to fuck you!" Ethan said.

That was it! Forgetting what happened the last time I assaulted a werewolf, I kicked him in the groin, hard. The moment of triumph I felt was soon overtaken by the pain in my foot.

"Shit!" I screamed. Great, not only had I been turned down for sex, I probably just broke my damn foot.

"Oh, God," Ethan ran to me. "Are you okay?"

"Hell, no, I'm not okay! I just kicked you!"

He chuckled a little.

"You're laughing at my pain? Nice!" I said.

"No, it's not that. It's just silly, is all," he said, sitting me down on the bed, pulling my foot into his lap, and kissing it.

"Gross! You're kissing my foot!" I said.

He stopped and looked at me. "I'm sorry."

"For what? Kissing my foot, insulting my friend, or refusing to fuck me?" I asked.

Then he laughed again. "All three, I suppose." He took a deep breath. "It's not that I don't want to have sex with you. I do. I just think we need to talk about it before, make sure we're really ready and not just rushing into it."

"Okay, how bout we talk about it right now? And then we can devise a story for my foot. Because I think the 'rents would flip if I told them how I really got it," I chuckled.

He nodded and got off the bed. "I'll be right back." He returned in a matter of seconds with a bag of frozen peas, placing it gingerly on my foot. "Better?"

I smiled and nodded.

He sat back down next to me, holding me in his arms. "I'm just going to start. If you feel the need to object at any time, please do, okay?"

"Mmmm…" I sighed.

"I won't sleep with you until you're 16. I know that's a little stupid, but saying you're 16 sounds more mature than 15, okay?"

"I see that logic, I guess." I didn't really, but this was the first time we had had a serious conversation about sex. Other times, it had been in the heat of the moment and we hadn't discussed any particulars just that we weren't going to do it.

"Secondly," he started, "I want it to be special, Ray. I want it to be the magical moment it's meant to be. I know two virgins going at it isn't the most elegant of moments but it needs to be perfect."

"I appreciate that, Ethan."

"I want to take care of you, protect you. I want it to be an act of love, not lust," he said, kissing my forehead.

He cleared his throat. "The next parts a little tricky. Protection."

Protection…who knew one word could make me blush. Fifteen minutes ago, I thought I was going to be deflowered and now I was blushing at the mention of birth control.

"The other wolf-girls said the most effective form is the pill. I just haven't had the courage to ask my Mom to take me to get them," I said.

I hated that thought. I couldn't exactly say, "Hey Mom! I want to have sex with Ethan and I don't want to get knocked up. Any chance you might take me to the clinic for some pills?" That would not go over well!

"I need to think about that one, Ethan. The logistics of it, I mean," I said, snuggling deeper into his chest.

He hugged me closer, kissing my hair. "Well, just know, come February, all bets are off. You'll be 16 and I will make it very special. Not as special as you, of course, but special."

I leaned up and softly kissed his lips, looking in his eyes and trying to show him how much I loved him and wanted to be with him. "I love you so much, Ethan."

He smiled, "Not nearly as much as I love you."

"Doubtful," I sighed. "Now, my foot."

He laughed again and I rolled my eyes. The plan we devised was foolproof (yeah, right). He carried me home, actually laying me softly in the bed. It was already five in the morning. The plan we had devised had me waking at 5:30 to go to the bathroom, only to kick my bedside table and fall to the floor. In reality, I hit the table with book, already laying on the floor, wailing as my Dad ran into the room.

"Trisha-bug, what happened?" Mom asked, yawning following Dad in.

"I-I-I had to go to the ba-bathroom. I k-kicked the taa-taa-taable!" I kept the tears coming. Holy shit! This was going to work.

"Oh, baby girl," Dad said, looking at my foot. "Rach, I think it may be broken. We need to get her to Forks to the hospital."

He picked me up and off we went. My parents sat with me at the hospital as my foot was being x-rayed. I had only a small fracture and a cast wasn't necessary. It was wrapped tight in a bandage.

I must have dozed off. I woke up in my own room, with Dad curled up on the floor next to my bed, clutching an old teddy bear he'd given me as a child. I giggled at the sight of this huge man, laying on my floor, holding onto the bear like a baby.

"What? Huh?" Dad said, sitting up and looking around.

"Nothing, Daddy. Go back to sleep." I kissed his cheek, grabbing my crutches and walking down the hall to the kitchen. It was only nine in the morning and Mom sat at the kitchen table, reading the newspaper.

"Morning, Trisha-bug," Mom said, sipping coffee.

"Morning, Mom," I said, hobbling over to a chair.

"How'd you sleep?" Mom asked, eyeing me suspiciously.

"Good, thanks. Did you know Dad slept in my room?" I asked.

She laughed, "Yeah, he was worried you might need something and not be able to get it. That man, I swear, he loves his girls."

"Mom, can I ask you a question?" She looked at me again, suspiciously.

I had run through my head last night how I was going to approach this. She obviously knew my hormones were practically ruling my body right now, otherwise she wouldn't have called in the wolf-girls for the talk. I had never really worried about talking about sex with her before. I knew I needed to take care of this particular situation and I couldn't do it on my own.

"Of course, Trisha-bug," she said.

I looked around the corner to make sure Dad hadn't gotten up. He hadn't, his snores still filling the hallway.

"Umh, I, uh…" Okay, maybe this was a bad idea.

"You know, Trisha, I was thinking it might be time to take you to see an OB/GYN. You're almost sixteen and it's good to make sure you're healthy. Would you be okay with that?" Holy shit! She took the idea right out of my head. It was kind of a "don't ask, don't tell" thing.

"Good, because I called and set up an appointment for you with a doctor in Port Angeles. Monday at noon. I'll take you," she said.

Three days later, I lay on a cold examination table, naked from the waist down, with a thin sheet covering me and my legs spread apart with my feet in the stirrups. This procedure was clearly something invented by a man. There was no way a woman would have decided to subject another woman to this torture. The doctor was very sweet and patient, taking her swab sample and then discussing my female health with me. When she asked if I was sexually active, I almost screamed, "No, but I wanna be!"

I left an hour later, feeling completely violated and completely with boxes of birth control pills.

Every evening that Ethan and spent together after that, I wondered if it would be "the night." I'd never really seen myself as a sexual creature, but now, anticipating that it could happen at anytime, I was the typical hormonal, sexually-frustrated teenager that made punk rock bands millions of dollars.

We agreed to wait until I was 16. So when my 16th Birthday rolled around, I was giddy, thinking it would be that day. My parents insisted on throwing a stupid Sweet Sixteen party for me, my Dad saying there was no way anyone could say "Sweet Sixteen and Never Been Kissed" because everyone knew I was almost not a virgin anymore. There weren't a lot of teenagers there. I really didn't have many friends outside the pack and that was the way I wanted to it. So most of the people at my "Sweet Sixteen" party were wolves, wolf-girls, or wolf kids. It was fun and my foot was finally healed, but the night of my 16th Birthday was not to be my night. It belonged to another couple.

Emily and Sam were some of the last to arrive at the party and I was thrilled to hold little Jesse. David and Mark were with them and both showered me with kisses on the cheeks when they saw me. The party was already in full swing and I passed Jesse on to Emily to go to the kitchen for a drink. I heard the doorbell ring and my Dad go to answer it. I recognized the voice right away and heard him telling everyone hello. I heard him walk up to Emily and say how he "couldn't believe he hadn't seen the baby yet" and "she was getting so big" and "could he hold her?" Emily didn't object and handed her off. Then I heard the familiar gasp. The gasp that always comes after someone imprints. It was followed by three growls. One from David, one from Mark, and one from Sam.

I heard Dad, Taylor, and Jared push the four wolves out the door and listened to the amusing exchange outside.

"Are you fucking kidding me?! Seth Clearwater?! My little girl?!" Sam was yelling.

"Wow. Identify the irony in that," I said to Mom under my breath. (AN: Before you freak, I do realize that Emily is Leah/Seth's second cousin. Therefore the baby would be a third cousin. It worked for Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt. If it bothers you, sorry.)

She laughed. "This is not going to be pretty."

In all honesty, it wasn't Sam I was worried about. He would yell, but he had gradually quit phasing and wouldn't revert back just to kick Seth's ass. I feared Seth's death at the hands of the Uley brothers.

Emily walked up behind me. "Trisha, I need a favor," she said.

"What?" I asked politely.

"You're the only one that can calm David down. I need you to go do it. I know he'll listen to you. Remember when I told you guys I was pregnant? You were the one that made it better. Please. I don't want Seth to be killed," Emily pleaded, with a few tears in her eyes.

I rolled my eyes. "Happy Freakin' 16th Birthday to me!"

I walked out the door grumbling, I was less than enthused about my task.

I looked to see Emily standing in the window. "Shit!" I said. I guess I was really going to have to do this.

"Trisha, he'll hurt you," Seth said as I walked forward, watching Seth be circled by the Uley boys.

David must have heard my name because he looked towards me, away from Seth.

"David," I said his name as sweetly as I could.

"No, Trisha, stay out of this," David muttered through gritted teeth.

Okay. Sweetness wasn't going to work. I'd have to pull the sassy card.

"If you hurt him, you will be the world's biggest hypocrite! Hello, you have an imprint yourself." Why did I just say that? Why did I acknowledge it?

David was too mad to react to that statement. "It's different. Jesse's my little sister. He can't have her."

I eased my way closer to David. I took his head in my hands and looked him in his eyes. "It's not like he's running off to Timbuktu with her right now. He will protect her."

"That's what we're for," David rebutted.

Fuck this! Happy birthday to me! I grabbed David's head again and shoved my mouth to his, practically pushing my tongue in his mouth.

"What the fuck?" I heard Mark say.

David pulled away. "Why'd ya do that? I thought, we were just friends?" He seemed sincerely concerned with my motives.

"We are just friends but it stopped you, didn't it?" I said, cocking an eyebrow.

He laughed. "I guess it did."

"Good. Now are you done? Because I don't believe you've given me a birthday present yet," I said, putting on the air of one of those bitchy girls I hated from Forks.

"I don't know. I think that kiss was a pretty good freakin' birthday present," Seth said as he started laughing. It didn't take long for the others to join in.

"Hardy-har-har! Where's my present?" I said to David.

"What's gotten into you? You're really spunky tonight?" David asked.

"Hello! It's my birthday!" I said.

David pulled out two boxes from his back pocket, both fairly small. He handed me the first one and I opened it gracefully. Keys. It was a set of keys.

"Your car's finished. I picked it up from the paint shop this afternoon. All you need now is a license and you'll be good to go," he said proudly.

I had to admit that I was proud of him. I had written him off as an imbecile but it turned out that he was smart, just not in the same areas I was.

"I'm sure you'll go see it tonight, right?" Helen asked from behind me. Did she want to get me killed on my birthday? She may have known that Ethan and I spent every night together in my grandfather's garage but the rest of the pack didn't need to.

I cleared my throat as he handed me the other box. "I didn't know what else to get you. Momma helped me pick them out. I hope they're okay."

I opened the second box just as gracefully as the first. A pair of earrings. Beautiful ruby earrings in the shape of apples. "They reminded us of you," he whispered. I held them very gently, listening as the only sounds around were the other guests breathing. No one could say anything.

"They're beautiful, David. Thank you," I murmured, pulling him into a hug, feeling his hand caress my lower back. "Can I put them on now?"

"I think they'd look exquisite vith that vred dress you have on," Leticia said.

I nodded and took them out of their box, placing them on my ears.

"Do they look alright?" I asked David.

He smiled at me, "Almost as beautiful as you."

NO! Please don't say that! Please! I don't want to feel guilty on my birthday. I want today to be normal. I want to be free today.

I hear Leticia squeal a little behind me and I smiled back at David.

I was relieved when the party ended, though, ready to make my way to the loveshack. I still had my Audrey Hepburn-esque red dress on and couldn't wait to see Ethan. I knew, it being my birthday, tonight had to be _the_ night.

I waltzed into the garage, seeing my beautiful candy apple red Mustang. For a split second, I thought of David. I didn't know if I could give myself to Ethan so close to this precious gift from David. It didn't matter, though. Ethan wasn't there. Just a note and a pretty pink Gerber daisy.

_Happy Birthday, my Ray!_

_I have to take care of something and won't see you for a few days._

_Meet me here on Valentine's Day. _

_See if you can sneak out a little earlier and wear the same dress you have on now._

_I promise to have a special surprise for you._

_I love you more than you could ever imagine!_

_Always yours,_

_Ethan_

Three days! I had to wait three days to see him! How the hell was that going to work? What could be so damn important that he had to leave for three days? What was I going to do for three damn days?

Nothing, that's what. I did absolutely nothing. I read and hung out at the Uleys', then cried at night wishing Ethan was close to me.

Valentine's Day crept up slowly. I always hated Valentine's Day, and Ethan knew that. He was going to have to come up with something really good to make up for the shitty holiday and three days of his absence.

I went to bed at nine that night, instead of ten. I put my red dress on and walked as fast as possible to the loveshack. Ethan was there waiting for me, dressed in a black button up dress shirt and nice jeans that make his ass look amazing. He wore black lace up boots and smiled as soon as he saw me walk in.

"Where've you been? I've been sick without you!" I whispered loudly.

"Getting everything ready for tonight," he whispered back kissing me softly on the lips. "Come with me."

He took my hand and we walked, him holding me close to stay warm. It wasn't a long walk, just up from our normal beach meeting spot, only deeper in the woods. The secluded area was lit by white Japanese lanterns. A blanket was spread on the ground, with a large camping tent set up. This was it. This was the place where I was going to become Ethan's. I knew it. I felt it exuding off of him and felt my own heart start to race. The scene was perfect but I was more nervous than I had ever been before. What if it hurt too much? What if I wasn't any good? What if? What if? I couldn't stop thinking.

"I thought we might look at the stars a minute. I stole some champagne from my parent's refrigerator. I thought we might try it," he said, sweetly.

I nodded, swallowing hard. We sat on the blanket, as he poured two glasses of the champagne. "This is totally illegal so don't tell anyone," he said.

I nodded again and swallowed hard again. I was afraid if I spoke, nothing would come out. He handed the glass to me and before he could say anything, I chugged it.

"Slow down, killer," Ethan said, chuckling.

I closed my eyes a second. "Sorry," I said.

"We don't have to do this," Ethan whispered.

I moved closer to him on the blanket. "I want to. I'm just nervous."

And then I kissed him. The world could have been thrown off its axis and I wouldn't have noticed. Ethan's kisses were just that good. My hands shook as I moved my fingers to start unbuttoning his shirt. He pulled away, moving to my feet and removing my shoes. Then he picked me up and carried me bridal style into the rather large tent.

The floor of the tent was surprisingly soft. Layers upon layers of blankets made the forest floor hardly noticeable beneath us. Ethan gently placed me on the blankets and zipped the tent up, while I continued to unbutton his shirt. He kissed me very softly, as I pushed his shirt over his shoulders. He moved his hands to the back of my dress, pulling my hair forward to unzip it. He ran a finger down my spine and the contact of his warm skin on my cool skin made me shiver.

"You okay?" he asked. I just smiled and nodded.

He pulled the dress forward, off my shoulders then placing hot, wet kisses on my shoulders.

"Lay back," he said.

I complied and felt him continue pulling the dress off, past my waist and then off completely leaving me in my lacy black bra and panties. He kissed my collarbone before moving down my chest kissing every possible area of bare skin all the way to the band of my panties.

"Wait," I sat up. "You have too many clothes on."

He started to unbuckle his belt but I stopped him. "Let me," I whispered into his ear.

I unbuckled the belt and slid the pants to his knees where he shimmied them off.

I made a mental clothes count in my head: Ethan-1, Trisha-2. That seemed fair to me. Obviously not to Ethan. He pulled me to his chest, growling a little, while he kissed me harder than before. His hands fumbled with my bra clasp but his lips never left mine as our mouths moved together.

He laid me back down, slipping my bra off and exposing my breasts. I heard another growl from him and laughed a little. He attacked me with kisses, moving down from my mouth to my cheeks to my jawline and down to my chest. He moved his mouth down my left breast before stopping at the nipple. He used his tongue to make a circle around it before slipping it in his mouth and sucking.

"Ahhh…" I moaned. The amazing thing about this type of physical contact is how other parts your body react to it. I knew I could feel the wetness collecting in between my legs before but Ethan sucking on my nipple like that practically caused a flood.

He moved to my right breast, repeating the action, and gaining the same response. He kissed down my chest and stomach, before using his teeth to slowly pull my panties off. I started to feel a little self-conscious and clammed my body up, crossing my arms on my chest and clenching my legs together.

"Would it make you feel better if I were naked too?" Ethan asked with a smirk.

"Yes, please," I smiled.

I slipped my tiny hands under the band of his boxers. I pulled them down quickly, freeing his erection.

"Someone's happy to see me," I said with a smile. What the hell did I just say? That was about the most unsexy thing, I thought, but it elicited another growl from Ethan and his lips back on mine.

My body relaxed a little and I spread my legs allowing Ethan to settle comfortably between them. He placed his hands on either side of my head and resumed ravishing my lips, his tongue darting in my mouth.

His right hand traced the right side of my body, running over my breast, then ribs, then hip before returning to its original spot.

"You are so beautiful, Ray," he said.

"You're not so bad yourself," I responded, as he laughed. I ran my hand down his gorgeous muscular chest feeling my way down to the part of him I wanted. I grabbed hold of his erection and felt him stiffen. _Holy Shit! There's no way he's going to fit in me_, I thought.

"You better be careful. It's not going to take too much to get me off right now, babe," he whispered.

I moved my hand back up his chest, resting it on his shoulder, and placing one wet kiss on his chest, where his heart was.

"I love you, Trisha," he said in a voice so sweet it was almost like a prayer.

"I love you, Ethan," I responded, saying his name with reverence and love.

"I kinda thought we'd leave all the teasing and foreplay for another time. At the risk of sounding corny, uhm, are you ready?" he asked.

This was the point of no return. If I didn't want to do it I needed to tell him now. But I could feel him hard against my moist pussy and I wanted it. I wanted it _bad_.

"Yes," I said.

He pulled my right leg up over his hip and settled at my entrance before giving me another passionate kiss. I felt him swallow hard, like I had been before. He stopped and didn't move.

"Is everything okay?" I asked.

Ethan shook his head yes but I could see something in his eyes. "What's wrong, sweetie?"

He ran his right hand through my hair. "I don't want to hurt you."

I didn't want him to hurt me, either. But I wanted to make love to him and the only way that was going to happen was to suck it up and deal with the pain just like the wolf-girls had told me. "Ethan, I can handle it but if you're having second thoughts and you don't want this, we can stop." _Please don't stop! Please!_

He shook his head. "No. I want this." And then he slowly pushed himself inside me.

.GOD. My whole body shuddered as the pain of Ethan inside me ran through my nerves. I could feel that he was only about halfway inside and worried I might pass out before he was even completely in me. I whimpered a little and felt a tear run down my cheek. I grasped onto his back trying not to tremble.

"I'm gonna stop," Ethan said, starting to pull out.

"Don't you dare," I pushed him back with my leg. "Just finish getting inside me and then I'll adjust."

He nodded and kept pushing. "Oh, fuck," Ethan said. "You have no idea how good this feels." He kissed me again. Once he started to push in again, I couldn't help but bite down on my bottom lip to keep from crying again. I dug my nails into his back instead, hoping he thought it was from pleasure.

_Okay, Trisha, man up and do this,_ I thought to myself.

I wiggled my hips a little, trying to get my tiny body to adjust to his huge dick, eliciting another moan of pleasure from Ethan. Okay, this wasn't working. I wasn't feeling anything but pain, and the heat from Ethan's body was starting to set in.

I closed my eyes tight and felt him move above me. He pulled out a little and then moved back in. "Ethan…" I moaned. If I let on even the littlest that I was still in pain, he would stop, so I had to at least make it seem like it was okay. He pulled out again and moved back in, once, then twice, and by the third time I felt comfortable enough to hitch my other leg up around over his hip.

Both of our breathing turned into panting as he continued moving in and out of me, each time a little faster than before. It felt good and I knew he was enjoying it but it wasn't like the pleasure I thought. I was still trying to deal with the pain of him stretching me and trying to keep Ethan from seeing the tears now flowing down my cheeks.

"I'm hurting you. I'm gonna stop," Ethan said, pulling out and sitting down next to me.

"Please don't. I really want to do this," I said, trying to sit up but feeling the soreness set in on my hips and legs.

"I won't be selfish, Trisha. I won't hurt you just so I can get off. It's not worth it," he was shaking his head, running his fingers through his hair. His eyes went between my legs to the blanket I was on and widened slightly. I looked down noticing the blood then.

"It's just a little rough the first time. I promise it's not too much. Please can we try again?" I really wanted to but I also wondered if a change in position wouldn't make it easier. "Maybe we should try a different position."

Ethan giggled like a schoolgirl. "What do you mean a different position?"

"Well the girls said sometimes its easier with the girl on top. Would you be okay with that?" I asked, trying not to look too closely at his face.

"The question is would you be okay with that?" Ethan asked. He knew I would feel strange being that exposed and no matter how much he wanted me, he wanted this to be enjoyable for me as well.

Actions speak louder than words. I pushed him down gently and crawled to straddle him. I kissed his lips and moved down his stomach. I bit my top lip as I moved back, raising up slightly and then lowering myself onto him very, very slowly. It hurt even worse to have him entering me again, I felt like I couldn't possibly stretch anymore.

_No, no, the pain's not really any better. Just give it a minute, Trisha. This is all you. You're in control. Suck it up and do this!_ My thoughts taking over again.

I closed my eyes and pursed my lips before I started to rock my hips. Forwards then backwards, forwards then backwards. With each thrust I felt another sharp pain when I came down on him.

"Ugh," I heard Ethan groan underneath me. He reached his hand up and cupped my right breast before pinching at the nipple. I opened my eyes to see him. His eyes also closed but his face with a look of euphoria. I sped up my rocking and clearly saw the change in his face. He was loving this, every last part of it. I ran my fingernails down his chest producing a slight moan. He responded with a feral growl. I didn't care if I was in pain as long as he wasn't.

He quickly rolled us, placing him on top again and forcing the soreness back into, well, every part of my body at this point, really. Ethan could tell this wasn't what I had expected. Determined, he moved his hand down my stomach to find my clit. He started massaging it with his thumb.

"Holy fuck!" I screamed out, feeling my walls start to clench a little and feeling the lubrication increase. I could feel it coming as he kept rubbing my clit.

"Ethan…Ethan…oh…ugh," I moaned.

"Yeah, I know," he panted and then with one last thrust, I felt my body let go, and the ecstasy that Aunt Nessie had described so many months before, set in.

"Fuck!" I screamed as he pushed in once more. Then I felt his warm release inside me, as he withered on top of me before collapsing and grunting, making the last thrust of pain worth it.

Neither of us moved for a minute, both of us trying to catch our breath, and me not really being able to move at all, hoping that next time would be less painful and more enjoyable.

He kissed my lips then my cheek. "I love when you say that word," he said.

"What word is that?" I asked trying to play innocent.

"You know the one," he was being sly.

"What, fuck?" Again with the innocence.

And then it was time for round two.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Then the Shit Hits the Fan"


	14. And Then the Shit Hits the Fan

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! You guys are awesome! **

**Very, very special thanks to yay4shanghai for being the most awesome beta on the face of the planet and to KupKakes09 because she rocks! Don't forget to show them some love!**

****************************************************************************

Chapter 13: "And Then the Shit Hits the Fan"

ETHAN'S POV

I was on high! The fucking king of the world! A freaking Mac truck could come and run me over and I wouldn't feel it. I was so happy. For the first time in months, I didn't feel like I had to compete with David for my Ray. She was all mine and she had given me everything.

I went home following my romantic tryst with Trisha, stumbling into the kitchen at well past 2 a.m. Dad was waiting for me. His face in a smile as I approached that fell as soon as I walked in.

"Ethan, what have you done?" He asked me.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"You smell like sex. You smell like sex and Trisha," Dad said.

"Well, that's not really any of your business, now is it?" I was tired of his lip.

"Actually, son, it is. What the hell am I going to tell your mother when you're dead? You know what the consequences are for a wolf having sex with another wolf's imprint?"

"Yeah, I know," I said, smartly, "and I don't care."

"You don't care? David will kill you, you do realize that, don't you?" Dad was always so rational when it came to imprinting. He didn't see that it could and should be broken. "Do you not remember the last time you fought David? You almost got yourself and your brother killed? Is that what you want?"

"It doesn't matter, Dad. Just stay out of it!" I ran upstairs to my room.

The high was gone.

TRISHA'S POV

It hurt to move. Every part of my body was in pain. After crawling in my window the night before, I ran to the bathroom for the typical sink scrubdown, having to scrub other parts that I had never given any consideration before. And then the guilt set in. I should have been overjoyed to have made love to Ethan, and I was. But also knew that there would be consequences if we were ever found out. I also knew that as much as I was fighting the imprint and didn't love David in the _love_ kind of way, I couldn't hurt him. Not anymore than I already had.

"Trisha, time for school," Mom said, tapping on my door and then letting herself in.

"Mom, I don't feel so good. Can I stay home today?" I didn't even roll over to look at her.

"What's wrong, baby girl?" She asked. She sat on my bed and put her hand to my forehead. "You don't feel like you have a fever. Is it your stomach?"

_Try a little lower than that_, I thought. Instead I said, "Yeah. I feel really crampy."

"Oh! That kind of pain! You stay in bed, okay?" Mom must have thought cramps meant my period. I didn't care, I just rolled over and closed my eyes. I drifted off to sleep and woke up later in the afternoon.

"Trisha?" I heard a husky voice say. "Are you feeling any better?"

I sat up and saw David sitting on my bed. "I hope you don't mind. Your Mom let me in." He gave me a "David-smile" and I burst into tears. My mind started going a million miles a minute and I could almost envision a hamster running on a wheel as my head started to hurt.

Why did he have to be so nice to me? If he'd known what I did last night, he would hate me. He would kill Ethan. Why was I so selfish? I maintained that this was just friendship, but I knew it wasn't. David's eyes showed so much more than just friendship. And even when we hugged, what seemed like an innocent friend hug, was filled with love and adoration.

David pulled me to him and I sobbed into his chest. "What did I do? I didn't mean to upset you." He was whispering softly into my ear. I could hear his voice start to shake and I looked him in the eyes. He was starting to tear up. Why? Because I'm his imprint, when I hurt, he hurts.

"Please don't cry, sweetie," he said.

I was being stupid and wreckless. I should have listened to the side of me that said "Fuck this! Kick him out!" But I didn't. I listened to the side of me that was relishing the closeness of David, the side that now that it knew what physical contact with a man was like, wanted anything just be nearer to David. I did something stupid.

I moved to straddle his waist, looking deeply into his eyes. He looked at me with confusion. I needed him to make me feel better. To make the terrible guilt go away. David was so important to me now, not in the same way Ethan was but just as important. It burned, the guilt— knowing that last night's events would crush the friend I now held so dear. I leaned in and kissed him softly. He kissed me back but quickly started to pull away. I grabbed his neck and pulled his lips back to mine, moving my hand to grab his and move it to my breast. It rested there for a second frozen before he squeezed it gently. I kissed him harder, unzipping his jeans and running my hand down his chest, shoving it into his boxers. He groaned as a grabbed hold of him.

Then David did the smartest thing I've ever seen him do. He pushed me off of him. "Um…I have to go," and then he gone. He knew this wasn't right. I wasn't right. I wasn't thinking clearly, everything in my world was shaking images and thought moving so quickly I couldn't keep them in perspective. I knew one thing for certain though, it was all my fault.

I've ruined it all! Everything was shit now and it was all my fault. I was in pain, I hurt David, and I was going to eventually hurt Ethan. I'd fucked it all up!

I rolled myself out of bed and threw on the nearest clothes I could find, shuddering a little with every step, feeling a little soreness from the previous evening's events. Sure, I didn't technically have my license yet, but I knew how to drive. No one would think anything about it. I jumped into my car. My car. The car that David had practically built from the ground up, just for me. Everything for me— even down to the car color, candy apple red. The tears didn't stop as I drove towards the Wahalla house.

I knocked on the door and waited for Kim to answer it. She was smiling, holding Annabelle in her arms. Then she looked at my face.

"What's wrong?" She asked, short but concerned.

"Can I talk to you?" I asked.

I had always been so close to Kim and the one thing that I missed most, since everything with Ethan had gotten the Wahalla family on the outs with everyone, was Kim's friendship. She was like a second mother to me, a trusted confidant. I felt like I had let her down almost as much as I had my own parents.

"Let me put Annabelle down for a nap and I'll be right back. Go get yourself something to drink in the kitchen." She closed the door behind her and moved towards the stairs.

I walked into the kitchen, grabbing a glass to fill with water.

"Come have a seat," she said sitting at the kitchen table, pulling out a chair for me.

I settled in, sipping the water, and trying not to look her in the eyes.

Kim put her hand on my cheek and turned me to look at her. "Alright, Trisha-bug, what's up?"

I started sobbing again. "Everything is messed up. I've ruined it all."

"What are you talking about?" Kim asked.

"Everything! Don't you see it? Ethan and I have been seeing each other for months. Months, Kim. I can't let him go. I love him so much, so, so much," I whimpered.

She sat up and sighed. "I'm not an idiot, Trish. I know you've been seeing him. I also know that you two had sex last night." Kim was never one to beat around the bush.

"How do you know that?" I asked.

"Jared said he wreaked of sex last night, and you," Kim folded her hands. "Why would you do that, Trisha? You know what happens if David finds out you two had sex? He's your imprint. He'll kill Ethan, you know that right?"

Another thing I hadn't thought of. The stupid rules of the pack. The rule that sleeping with another's imprint meant a fight to the death, a fight everyone was certain Ethan would lose. Hell, even I knew he would never be able to beat David.

I shook my head at her. "Even if I did, I would have done it anyway. I'm selfish, Kim. I'm the worst kind of person out there. I want my cake and I want to eat it too. Now I've doomed Ethan to death and David will hate me forever."

Kim grabbed my shoulders. "What I'm going to say to you is not easy and I should've said it months ago. I always thought that you'd figure it out for yourself. God, I feel like a traitor saying this." She cleared her throat and looked me straight in the eyes. "I love you Trisha and I would have loved to have had you as a daughter-in-law, but the game is up. You need to stop playing around. You need to give in to the imprint."

I stared at her stunned, hurt, and a little pissed off. "What are you saying? What about Ethan?"

"That's exactly why you need to give in now, cuz you will sooner or later. Would you rather it be now, while your relationship is still fresh or years from now, when you've been together for so long," she paused. "You're going to hurt him eventually. It won't be as bad if you just get it over with now."

"No! I won't! I love him! He's my everything, Kim! I won't be able to live, to breath, to exist without him! I can't…" I trailed off in sobs.

I saw Kim's watery eyes. "If you love him, sweetie, you'll let him go."

"But I don't love David. I could never love him like I love Ethan," I whimpered.

Kim pulled me into a hug. "Give it time. You'll love him. They always do, who can resist a guy that loves you with every inch of his being?"

"But I can't…" I trailed again.

"You can. You have to, and you know this is the right thing to do," Kim continued hugging me, as I sobbed into her chest.

I heard Jared come in and Kim tell him to call my Dad to come get me. Dad was less than thrilled. I didn't stop crying. I couldn't will my body to stop.

On the way home, while drowning out Dad's banter about "my age" and "the car" and "why was I home from school," I made my decision.

I didn't leave my room all evening. Not for dinner, not to talk to David when he called, not for anything. When I heard my Dad's snores set in, I climbed out the window and headed to the loveshack. Ethan wasn't there yet. I was glad of that, I sat down on the seat, the same dumb van seat that had been there for years and had gotten me in so much trouble.

"Hey, babe," Ethan said as he walked in the garage. He sounded so happy. He leaned in to kiss me but I pushed him away.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"I can't do this anymore. I can't lie and cheat and disappoint everyone anymore. I won't," I said.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" He asked, naively.

"I'm done Ethan. I'm done sneaking around, I'm done breaking everyone's heart, I'm done being the screw up, the one everyone gossips about and looks down on." I knew I was hurting him. I needed to hurt him to make it believable, for him to know he had to move on.

"You don't mean that, Ray, I know you don't. You love me and I love you. No one else, remember?" His voice was cracking, fighting off tears, I clenched my fist forcing my tears back.

"I don't. Not anymore. I owe it David to see…" Ethan interrupted me.

"This is about David? This is about that good-for-nothing son of a bitch that couldn't even add two plus two until fourth grade? There's no way you want him. I know you, Trisha, you would die from boredom with him."

"You shouldn't talk about my imprint like that. Don't you get it, Ethan? I don't belong to you! I never did!" I screamed at him.

"So you belong to him?!"

"I don't belong to anyone! Not to you, not to David, not to Paul fucking Wise! I am me and I am making a decision for me!" I rebutted.

"Yeah, because everything else in this whole fucking situation was never about you!" Ethan added, sarcasm dripping from his words. "Because it's your family that everyone hates. You're the one that got your ass kicked by your ex-best friend and his gay brother."

"Leave Mark out of this! He's never done anything to you. In fact, he was a brother to your brother when you were too busy wallowing in self-pity," I spat at him. I felt very defensive of Mark. He could say whatever he wanted about me, my family, hell even David, but Mark was off-limits. Mark had been a bigger man than either he or David, willing to pick up the slack when they both couldn't or wouldn't.

"Self-pity caused by you, my dear," Ethan said. "Ray, I know what you're doing. I'm disappointed that you're so easy to give up. We've fought for two years and now you're just quitting?"

"Yes. I don't want you anymore, Ethan. Please leave me alone," I said it. I cut him out just like that.

"You're making a huge mistake. I can't believe this! I've lost so much for you, I spend my days alone, my father won't talk to me, I lost my friends, everything! Ugh! And of course, like a typical Black, you're playing the victim, making yourself a martyr for your own fucking cause. Good luck! Even if David is dumb enough to fall for you, he won't ever love you like I have. Like I always will." And then he was gone.

My loveshack was now a mausoleum. The place that had once held such enjoyment now exuded defeat. It was the death, not of a person or a car, but of a love that was so great, both parties were willing to make sacrifices for the other. And now my Ethan was gone. The boy I dreamed about for the last five years of my life, who I followed and adored for as long as I could remember, was no longer a part of my world. I curled into a ball on the cursed van seat and cried, almost positive that I would never stop mourning the love that once was.

DAVID'S POV

I could still taste her on my lips. I would never wash them. I wanted Trisha with me in some form forever. Why the fuck did I stop her? If I hadn't pushed her away, we'd both no longer be virgins and we'd both be the happiest people in the world. God, I loved her! I denied it and denied it, but I loved her. And I wanted her, bad!

I couldn't stop thinking about the things I wanted to do to her. She was so damn hot! I could feel myself getting hard as I fantasized about her body. Shit! This is no bueno! Not good! How'm I gonna ride in the truck to take her to school tomorrow if I can't look at her without getting so much wood I could build the next ark? But she was just so beautiful and, hot damn, that girl knew how to kiss.

I had done a lot in my life, sexually, I mean. I had Mallory, my last girlfriend who I have to admit was never afraid to try anything, and before her, Tiffany, the girl that worshiped the ground I walked on. Mallory and I enjoyed a very physical relationship. We're talking blowjobs, fucking her with my tongue, you name it. But kissing Trisha was so much better than any of that.

What made life so miserable was knowing Trisha was hiding something from me. For months, as I worked on her car, planning how we'd christen the backseat, the same backseat we'd eventually haul our kids around in, and I could smell his scent all around. It made me want to puke. Ethan's disgusting sweet scent practically painted the walls of that damn garage. But I never let on to Trisha that I knew. I had to trust her, Momma said, trying to calm me after the first week of coming home and wanting to bash Ethan's fucking head in.

I was completely lost in my thoughts when Mark pounded on my door.

"Dude, it's 4 in the morning, you jackass! What'd you want?" I screamed at him.

"It's Trisha. Paul and Rachel can't find her." He mumbled it a little, not awake himself.

I jumped out of bed. "What'd you mean they can't find her?"

"Paul got up to take a piss and stopped to check in her room. She wasn't there. He's not phasing anymore so he can't sniff her out," he said as I opened the door, pulling on a pair of sweats, I was in the buff, I stopped wearing clothes to bed when my temperature rose over 100. "He wants you to find her, David. He said you'd feel a pull or something to where she is."

I didn't need to think about where she was. I knew. The only thing I had to wonder was if she was alone or if Ethan was with her.

"I know where she is. Call Paul and tell him to meet me at Billy's." I ran out the door, tying the pants to my ankle and running to phase.

_Damn! I never get tired of being a wolf!_ I thought.

_David, is that you?_ It was Embry. _Shouldn't you be sleeping?_

_Trisha's missing. Paul asked me to go find her_. I thought.

Then it happened. I felt Ethan phase. His thoughts were held back for a minute, until he realized I was phased. I could almost hear him give me an evil laugh like the bad guys in movies give when they do something really terrible.

I saw Trisha. My Trisha, laying under him and he was clearly fucking her.

_You son-of-a-bitch! What the fuck have done? I swear, when I find you, you are fucking dead! _I thought.

_Holy Shit, Ethan! _Embry again. _What __**have**__ you done?_

_You mean besides Trisha? _Now Ethan was just being a prick. He was doing this just to piss me off, not because he was disrespecting Trisha.

I growled and ran faster. I had a choice to make. I could either find Ethan and kill him like the wolf in me wanted to do or I could find Trisha and make sure she was safe like my heart wanted to do. I decided this time to follow my heart.

I phased back as I got to Billy's garage. I could hear her crying. The sounds coming from her reminded me of that time last year when I kicked Mark in the balls. It was a sound of pain.

_For fuck's sake, he better not have hurt her_. I thought as I walked in the garage.

She was saying something but it was just words all jumbled up. It didn't make sense. She kept saying "Give in" and "dead" and "love." I scooped her up from the tear stained seat.

"Trisha, are you okay? Are you hurt?" I asked.

"David…" she whispered and put her hand on my cheek. "For you." She mumbled.

_Wow. No idea what she's talking about_. I thought.

I heard Paul pull up outside. He came in the garage and looked at his daughter.

"What the hell happened?" He asked.

"I found her like this. I don't think she was alone before I got here." I told him.

He leaned down to take her but I growled at him. "I got her." I felt like an ass for a second, staking my claim a little, but I needed to feel her, to know she was okay. I carried her to the car, keeping her in my lap while Paul drove to their house.

"Tell me what's wrong," I whispered in her ear. "I want to make it better."

She didn't say anything. She just kept sobbing into my bare chest. I knew one thing, I wasn't letting her go. I would wait until she told me she didn't want or need me before I let her go.

Rachel was standing on the porch waiting for us when we pulled into the driveway. "Where was she? Is she okay?" Rachel was scared shitless. I could hear it in her voice.

"She's not saying anything," Paul said.

Rachel moved a little forward and I started to growl before Paul grabbed her arm. "David won't let you touch her. Trust me, I tried," Paul said.

Mark was waiting for us in the house. "Bro, I know what happened," he whispered.

I carried Trisha back to her room and sat on her bed, still holding her.

"So, are you gonna tell me?" I snapped at Mark.

Mark sat next to me, placing his hand lightly on her back, I didn't protest. "She dumped him. Embry saw the whole thing when Ethan phased. He said you phased back and then Ethan just poured it all out."

"So what happened, give it to me straight." I said.

"She told him she needed to give into the imprint. She was tired of sneaking around, tired of everyone hating everyone else. He told her she was just playing the victim and she told him she didn't want him anymore. Basically, she's choosing you."

"Did she say those exact words? 'I want David?'" I asked.

"No, not in those exact words. But she did say it wasn't fair to be stringing you along like she has been and that she needed to try this out and see," Mark was happy.

I should have been thrilled, right? She was choosing me. I won. That simple. But I knew there was no way it would be this easy, and I didn't want to win her at the cost of losing every part of her that I loved. Losing her spunk and fullness of life. If that were the case, I wouldn't have really won her at all, right?

*NEXT CHAPTER: "¿Donde Esta Ethan?"


	15. The Best Laid Plans

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids, except Jesse. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! You guys are awesome! **

**Very, very special thanks to yay4shanghai for being the most awesome beta on the face of the planet and to KupKakes09 because she rocks! Don't forget to show them some love! Also, check out She's A Boozer. **

**Stay tuned to "Once the Earth Settled" by yay4shanghai, as Trisha, Ethan, and David will be mentioned in the near future. **

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Chapter 14: "The Best Laid Plans"

ETHAN'S POV

Exactly how did this happen? Less than forty-eight hours ago, I was basking in the orgasmic bliss that was my Trisha. Now, I'm trudging through the SeaTac Airport, at 5:45am, waiting for my flight to leave.

She cut me out. She pushed me away. And all I wanted now was to get the fuck out, to leave that godforsaken town, with its mythical creatures and legends that I had once been so proud of. The only thing that mattered to me in the entire world, didn't want me anymore. How was I supposed to deal with that? How was I supposed to see her everyday, moving on with her life, while I sulked miserably for the rest of my lousy existence? I wanted her to be happy, that's all I ever wanted, but I couldn't stand to see it if it meant her happiness was with David.

You know, maybe this was my fault to begin with. Maybe, when I found out she was David's imprint, I shouldn't have allowed myself to love her like I did. I had put this all on her and on my ex-best friend, never realizing that in actuality this all might have been avoided, had I really broke it off after the imprint. Then, I made it worse by coming back, by following her around and revealing myself in the library that day. I should have stayed away… I made this harder for my Ray than I needed to, than it should've been. Shit, I made it harder for myself, I had a taste of what things could be like with Trisha, and now I knew that's all I would ever get. Now my entire family were La Push pariahs and it was all my fault.

Not to mention what I had done to my ex-best friend. My irreplaceable best friend… She was his imprint. It wasn't like he could help it. David had always supported me. No matter what it was. We shared almost every coming of age moment together. He and Trisha were like extensions of my family. They completed me. If I had just let him have her, I would still have the two most important people in my life. I would have my two best friends. We would still be a family. And we would continue to be friends, and then our kids would be best friends, and nothing would've changed. But then I couldn't handle the thought of someone else loving Trisha, loving her like I had, like I would continue to.

I literally felt my life fall around me as she said those words. _"I don't want you anymore._" How could it all end just like that? After so many years? After so much love and life? After everything we had fought for?

I only had time to grab a few things: some money, passport, a few clothes. I said my goodbyes to Taylor, he supported me, he always did. I didn't deserve a brother like him. He knew I was wrong, that this whole thing was my fault. But he didn't throw it in my face, he just hugged me and asked me to take care of myself. He was my baby brother, but he was already a better man then I would ever be. I apologized and begged him to take care to the family, not to let anything happen to them. Not to stand for them taking the blame for me.

I left a note for Mom and only hoped she would forgive me for running off and leaving all of that behind me, for not being a better big brother and son.

_Mom-_

_I'm going away for a little while._

_Things with Trisha kind of went to shit._

_I'm sorry I can't be the son you deserve._

_I'm sorry I wasn't the brother I should have been._

_Taylor will look after the girls._

_Tell Dad I love him and always have._

_I'm so sorry for all the pain and embarrassment I've caused our family._

_Maybe, one day, I'll come back._

_I'll write._

_Love you so much._

_Your son,_

_Ethan_

I had no idea where I wanted to go, where fate would lead me. So I went to the airport, looked at the list of available flights, and paid double what a ticket online would have cost, to leave this piece of shit life behind ASAP. To leave my livelihood, to let her choose him, like I knew she wanted to, like she should have in the first place.

"_Delta Flight 2422 with service to Dallas/Fort Worth, now boarding at Gate E11."_ Dallas was not the ultimate destination. My goal was much farther south. From Dallas, it was on to South America. I knew absolutely nothing about South America but I spoke enough Spanish to get by and it was far. It was far enough away to ease the heart ache, to make it easier to say goodbye. In South America, I could mourn my losses— the loss of my love and the loss of my best friend, both of whom I wasn't sure I had given that much of a fair chance anyway.

TRISHA'S POV

Cutting him off shouldn't have felt this way. It was supposed to be easy, I was letting Ethan go on to live his life. It wasn't though. My feeling of things returning to normal, of letting him move on and find his own imprint and life, were supposed to be good. That was the plan, make him believe that I didn't want him anymore… but you know what they say, "the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry."

Exactly two minutes after Ethan walked out of our loveshack, I realized I had made the biggest mistake of my life. How could I just let my beautiful love, my other half, go? How could I listen to anything or anyone but my heart.

I ran out of the garage into the night, screaming his name, "Ethan! Ethan! Come back!"

Surely that super wolf-hearing would come in useful at some point and couldn't that point be now? Of course not…

"Ethan! I've made a mistake! Please, come back, PLEEASE!" Tears came fast. Where was he?

"I was just kidding! I want you! I've always wanted you!" Still nothing.

He had to answer me! Had to!

"Ethan! Please! I will die without you! Please come back to me!" I was screaming, sobbing, falling on my knees.

Then it hit me. What if this was what he wanted? What if I was being selfish again? Maybe he needed me to release him and let him find his imprint. But surely he hadn't fallen out of love with me that quickly? This couldn't be happening…how had I been so stupid to think I was worth it? I was worth all the trouble. I gave him what he needed: the strength to say good-bye to me and leave me with his best friend to take care of.

"Please don't leave me!" My sobs were harder now and I gasped for air to breathe. I felt my stomach churn as the realization that Ethan was gone and I was going to be alone forever sat in. One more breath and I heaved the contents of my stomachs onto the grass.

I took a deep breath and the sobs returned. I had done it now. He was gone. I was alone.

I started crawling, feeling the weight of the mistake in every bone of my body, wanting nothing more than to curl up and die, to slowly fall into the darkness that I could feel surrounding me. If I was lucky, no one would find me and I would just fade away. I was a complete and utter fucking, cold hearted, pain-in-the-ass bitch and I deserved everything I was getting. No one deserved to be stuck with me.

I kept crawling, back into the garage, feeling my stomach churn again. I dry-heaved, nothing left to come out.

"What've I done?!" I was hoping Ethan would hear me.

I climbed onto the cursed van seat, thinking I might drown in my tears.

_He'll come back. He has to, he has to know how much I love him_. I thought to myself.

All I could do was hope…hope he knew I knew this was a mistake…hope he would return to me and not hate me…hope he knew how very much he meant to me…hope…

*NEXT CHAPTER: "¿Donde Esta Ethan?"** **************************************************************************

**Another AN: I promise I will have this story updated again by Tuesday.**


	16. ¿Donde Esta Ethan?

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids, except Jesse. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**I apologize for the delay in update. I planned on having it in by 5, but like the title of the last chapter, "the best laid plans…" Thank you to all of you who continue to read and review! You guys are awesome! **

**Very, very special thanks to yay4shanghai for being the most awesome beta on the face of the planet and to KupKakes09 because she rocks! Don't forget to show them some love! Also, check out She's A Boozer AND CallmeEmbrys, who has like two stories I'm absolutely in love with! **

**Check out yay4shanghai's new story "****The Pathetic Ramblings of a Homosexual Werewolf" about David's brother, Mark.**

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Chapter 15: "¿Donde Esta Ethan?"

DAVID'S POV

One week. I held her in my arms for one week. She cried. And cried. And begged for Ethan to forgive her. She was too late though. The day after the break up, he didn't show up for patrol, the pack searched but he wasn't found. Ethan had gone. Just left, taking his passport and cash. Kim was heartbroken. And Jared was stressed to the max. The next week, Trisha got out of bed, and ran to the garage before I could stop her. She screamed bloody murder trying to find Ethan. Every syllable out of her mouth made me flinch. I couldn't help but be jealous.

It didn't take long for the gossip to start. All the old bitties on the reservation had theories as to what had happened. I heard everything from Trisha got pregnant and had an abortion then Ethan flipped and ran, to Ethan being abducted by aliens from the planet Zoltar. (I kind of liked that theory.) Only one thing was for sure: Ethan had disappeared and Trisha was, well, broken.

I stayed with her every second of that first week. I made sure she ate, made sure she slept, made sure she bathed. Rachel stayed nearby too. She didn't talk to Trisha too much though, I don't think she knew what to say. After that first week, Rachel made me leave during the day to go to school. I only had three months left until graduation and God knows I didn't want to repeat my senior year. I came back every night and stayed with Trisha, though. Rachel made me a pallet on the floor with blankets. Trisha slept most of the time, but every now and then, I'd look up and see her staring at me. I'd smile and then she'd put her hand out. She usually just wanted to touch me, I think, to know I was still there.

Dad came by everyday to check on me, and Trisha. He checked up on the Wahallas sometimes too, which was little awkward for them, I'm sure. Although the pack didn't really blame them for the Ethan thing, it was still a little tense.

Then a month had passed. Rachel told the school she was homeschooling Trisha, and she did try, but Trisha refused.

Mark was my savior. He kept me from falling apart. When I wasn't with Trisha, I was being a pussy and crying to him about how fucked up everything had gotten. Now, after being told basically, that I had won, why would I still feel this way? Simple. I had spent months falling in love with a girl that I thought might be feeling something back, only to find out she fucked my best friend.

He wasn't anymore, right now he was the only wolf I would like to see dead, but for a really long time Ethan was my partner, we did everything together. He was as good as a brother to me, and that's what hurt the most. Ethan took more than just her virginity from me, not that it was mine to start with, be got the best parts of her, the parts where she was herself and not pretending. Ethan got the parts where she smiled because she wanted to, or kissed with a real passion. I got the act, the leftovers. I was second best. I was not what she wanted but what she had to settle for.

Mark knew I was pissed at myself for not realizing what the hell was going on. I had smelt Ethan. I knew he had been in that damn garage and sometimes I would catch a whiff of him in her hair. But I kept my mouth shut. I tried to trust her. I let him take her because I wasn't man enough to win her over myself.

Mark helped me deal with knowing that Trisha was wrong. That she knew what she was doing, but she did it anyway. In my life, I had thought of Trisha Wise as a lot of things, but selfish was never one of them. I was wrong about that. Ethan didn't take her, she gave herself to him knowing that it could mean his death. Knowing that I would have to fight and kill the friend I had spent years confiding in, sharing every thought and dream with.

Most importantly, Mark let me know that I had to push all that bullshit out of the way and help her heal. Where I had failed before, I wouldn't now. Because, we were all almost certain, Ethan Wahalla would never show his face in La Push again. Ever. And part of me did a victory dance with that thought. I hated him, so much, that thinking about him made my vision go red. I hated him for not respecting me enough to leave Trisha alone. For not respecting the pack enough to not ignore his own desires and fuck a wolf-brother's imprint. For being just as selfish as Trisha. For knowing the rules and breaking them anyways. For shaming his parents and making them outcasts. For being a little bitch and leaving before I had the chance to beat his ass. For _making_ Trisha break it off with him. For making me wince in pain everytime I looked at my beautiful soulmate's blank eyes. For making me die a little each time she said _his _name. This, ultimately, was all _his_ fucking fault.

"If you love her like you say you do, like I know you do, you will have to swallow your pride and be the man I know you are. You have to forget it all and help her," Mark, always the voice of reason. I was so proud to call him my brother.

By the second month, Rachel was calling shrinks. Trisha still didn't do anything but sleep and cry. I couldn't figure out how she had any damn tears left in her eyes. It was April of my freakin' senior year of high school. I should have been worrying about things like my future. Well, I kinda was. Only my future lie in bed all day doing nothing but crying and worrying the hell out of her parents and me. To be honest, Paul Wise was the biggest, meanest, scariest son-of-a-bitch I knew. He liked me, but if anyone, I mean anyone, got out of line, it was no holds barred fist action. I had never seen him like he was now. One time, after school, I let myself in the door like always and I found him standing over Trisha's bed, crying. He played it off when he saw me but I know what I saw. Paul had said some shitty things to Trisha before, but he loved her. I can only imagine how hard it is to have a daughter, especially for Paul, the true man's man, to have a daughter, a daughter that he would kill for to protect.

My temper was getting really short at school, too. Everyone was always running around going on and on about prom and graduation, total chick shit. I have to admit part of me was jealous. I would have loved to have taken Trisha to prom. I didn't have the guts to ask her, seeing as how she was broken hearted and all, and hadn't said anything other than sobbing and wailing for two months. I thought getting a dress and having her hair done might be a bit much.

I spent prom night next to her bed. It was a good day. Trisha actually sat up and watched a movie with me. _Dances with Wolves_. Funny, huh? She wanted me to hold her while we watched the movie. She even ate popcorn with me. I think I saw her smile when the guy chased the wolf around. "I don't know. I think I'm cuter than that wolf," I said. I was actually pretty serious but it made Trisha giggle a little. It was a wonderful sound. A sound I had missed.

Before long, it was final's week, the last week of school, counting down to graduation. I was studying. Yeah, you heard me, studying. I couldn't graduate unless I passed my finals. I was having the hardest time in Spanish and as much as Mark tried, I just wasn't getting it. I was studying at the Wise house, watching Trisha sit.

"What are you studying?" HOLY SHIT! She spoke! She was actually sitting up and looking at me.

"Spanish…it's like the hardest language on the face of the planet! I don't get it," I sighed, wishing I could've been one of those child geniuses that speaks like twelve languages. But no…I was lucky I spoke English right.

"Do you want help?" Trisha's voice was quieter and hoarser than usual. I was still jazzed to hear it.

I shook my head. "Nah, I don't want to bother you."

"Please, let me help you, David," she said looking down.

"I don't want you to feel like you have to, like you owe me anything," I said. I have to admit, the way I said it was not very nice.

She closed her eyes. "I just wanted to help you." She laid herself back down and rolled onto her side away from me.

_Way to go, Uley, you jackass. She just wanted to help_, I thought to myself.

"I'm sorry, Trish. I didn't mean it," I whispered, walking over to her. She was crying again, but this time I knew those tears weren't for Ethan. They were for me. And because of me.

"I really did just want to help. I don't want you to fail out of school because of me," she said back, her voice quivering.

"I'm having problems with questions and answers. You think you can read the questions from the book and I'll answer them?" I asked her.

"Yes," she said, rolling over to look and sitting up.

I had missed being able to look in her eyes, and the moment I did, I felt that pull. I wanted to be as close to her as possible, to be her everything, to stop her pain.

"¿Cómo estás?" She asked.

"Muy bien. ¿Y tu?" I asked her.

"A sí a sí." She answered back. God, was it bad I thought she was so damn hot when she spoke Spanish? I'd heard people speak Spanish, hell, every time I was at Embry's place Leticia was always good for yelling a few things in Spanish. But, Trisha, ¡Dios mío!

I saw her look down at the book for the next question, her eyes growing wide, then sad and droopy. She looked at me. "I can't ask the next question, David."

"Let me see it," I said as I took the book from her hands.

"_¿Donde esta Ethan?"_ it said. Ethan? Why would the fucking textbook company pick the name Ethan?

"Um…we can skip it if you want," I said, trying to sound.

She nodded and then looked at me. "Does anyone know where _he_ is?"

How do I put this delicately? Saying "_I don't really fucking care_" might not be the best thing to win points with her. So I was polite. "No. No one knows."

"Hopefully he's safe. He should call Kim, though. She's worried sick, I'm sure." Trisha was so sweet to be concerned about that asshole. But then, she loved that asshole and not me.

"Uh-huh," I just kind of grumbled.

She looked down at the purple quilt on her bed. "Lo siento," she whispered and then looked up me.

Fuck! What did that mean? Why couldn't I remember? I knew I should've listened to Senor Guapo more carefully. I heard Embry say it a few times to Leticia, too.

Trisha must have seen the look of confusion in my eyes. "It means 'I'm sorry.'"

I scoffed at her. "Exactly what're you sorry for?"

"A lot of stuff. Can we talk about it some other time though?" She was on the verge of tears and I didn't want to be the cause of my imprints heartache. Not today. She was finally talking to me and I wasn't going to fuck that up.

"I was thinking of ordering a pizza. You hungry?" I was starving and my Trisha hadn't been eating like she should. I could tell she'd lost weight, her pajamas hung to her skin differently than before that prick ruined her.

"Pizza sounds really good. Can we get the Pie o' Meat?" She asked.

I had to kind of laugh at that, knowing that she probably never got to eat meat with the jerkface, being as he was vegetarian and all. "Anything you want, dollface." I said, watching her giggle a little.

"Dollface? Have you been watching old gangster movies again?" I laughed, again. I had gone through a phase where I only watched movies like _The Untouchables _and _Goodfellas_. It was kind of flattering to think she remembered that.

"No, though you do remind me of those pretty ladies from those movies. I just thought it was a good nickname for you," I was trying to seem smooth. I'm not sure it worked.

I called and ordered the pizza. "I've gotta go get it. You wanna come?" She hadn't left the house since her outburst in February. I doubted she would want to but I asked anyway.

"Is it okay if I just stay here?" Trisha almost seemed like she was apologizing.

"Of course, dollface," I winked and left to get the pizza.

Little Danny's Pizza was a popular restaurant amongst the pack. Mostly because you could get like twelve pizzas for under a hundred bucks, and we wolves do love our pizza. It was owned by a silly old couple, neither Quileutes. Danny was a little redheaded Irish man and his wife, Sophia, claimed to be from Sicily (which, as it was explained to me, is an island in the sea next to Italy). The pizza was mind-blowing and each one had an Irish name. Like the one Trisha requested "Pizza O' Meat" or another favorite "Shamrocks and Shrooms," a fancy description of spinach and mushrooms. Danny and Sophia didn't know any specifics about the pack, just that we ate. A lot. But as time went on they learned about our personal lives, including the latest drama with Trisha.

"How is the wee lil' baby garl, doin'?" Danny asked, handing me the two pizzas.

"Umh…well, she's a little better, I think. She actually talked today. Helped me study for a Spanish test," I said to Danny and Sophia.

"Ye hang in there, lad. She'll come round," he said, patting me on the back.

I started to leave when Sophia, all four foot nine inches of her, stopped in front of me. "Leesen to what I tell you. You say theese to her, hokay? You say 'Estoy aquí. Nunca le dejaré. Yo soy tu's.'"

"What the hell does that mean?" I wasn't meaning to be rude but it would've taken me all night to translate that.

"Eet's Spanish. Eet means 'I am here. I will never leave you. I am your's.' Theen you keese her. Eet will work. I wrote eet down for you," Sophia smiled at me and handed me a piece of paper.

"Umh…Thanks, I think," I said as I walked out.

I drove fast to the Wise house. I was surprised to see Trisha in the kitchen.

"What are you doing? Do you need something?" I asked her, almost panicked she was moving and was out of bed.

She half-smiled. "I'm just getting some water. Do you want something to drink?"

I nodded to her, "water's good." She smiled at me as she handed it to me. She had gotten dressed while I was gone, had taken a shower. Her wet hair was in a sloppy bun on the top of her head, her hot pink camisole clinging to every curve of her body, short shorts revealing enough to make a man go mad. I was harder than the quadratic equation and thankful that my nether region was covered by the dining room table.

"So what are plans for after graduation?" she asked, taking a big bite of her slice of pizza. God, that mouth, that glorious, glorious mouth!

"Like for the summer or like for life?" I asked.

She giggled. "Both, I guess."

"Well, this summer I have to run more patrols. I'm picking up some of the slack from Mark. He's taking some college courses at Peninsula College in Port Angeles over the summer. I want him to be able to concentrate on school, so it's the least I can do," I said. I felt like I was talking to her the same way I did three months ago. Before the breakdowns and breakups.

"You're a really good big brother, David," she said, as she put her hand over mine and looked in my eyes.

"Thanks. It's easy with a great brother like Mark. I just wish the smarts would've rubbed off on me a little more," I said.

"You're smart in your own right, David. Like cars. What in the hell would I have down if you weren't a car god? I'd still be looking at a heap of metal, because you know Dad's not going to have the patience to spend more than five minutes working on it," Trisha was complimenting me and I liked it.

"Thanks again," I said to her, nodding my head. "I have to patrol until three. Do you want me to come back after?"

She had the cutest look on her face, thinking really hard. "No. You probably haven't slept in your bed for awhile. Go home." She took another bite of pizza. "How's Jesse?" She smiled.

My Trisha loved that little girl and it had been fun to watch her interact with Jesse, that is, whenever Seth wasn't lingering around making a fool of himself.

"She's good. Five months now, you know," I said, beaming like the proud brother I am.

Trisha looked down and frowned. "I miss her."

Trisha had been there through most of Momma's pregnancy and was one of the first people to hold Jesse. She was also one of the few to not freak out when Seth imprinted on her. Trisha's love for Jesse made me fall even deeper in love with her, not a good thing, I realize now, thinking about what was going on with her and Ethan at the time.

"I could take you to see her tomorrow if you want. After school. If you want," I said, practically begging in my head.

"That would be good." She smiled at me.

"It means you _would_ have to leave the house, though. You okay with that?"

"I will be. Not right now, but by tomorrow afternoon, I will be," she took more pizza.

"Promise?" I asked.

"Pinky swear," she said, putting her pinky out for me to take. I wrapped mine around it very carefully, not wanting to hurt her.

"Pinky swear," I winked at her.

I left Trisha's house early that night, meeting Mark in the woods to start my patrol.

"_How is she?" _Mark asked.

I showed him my day with Trisha, that she and I talked, ate pizza, studied Spanish, and then made a date for the next day.

"_She looks a lot better,_" Embry thought.

"_Better, but still a long way to go,_" I thought.

"_If anyone can help her get over this, it's you,"_ Embry thought.

"_I hope,"_ I thought.

I spent the night patrolling, finding nothing out of the ordinary. I ran past Trisha's window a few times just to check up on her. She tossed and turned a lot and I fought the urge to crawl in the window and cuddle with her each time I saw her. After patrol, I ran home just in time to catch Momma and Jesse up for their four o'clock feeding. I tried to be really quiet, hoping I could just go to my bed, but Momma caught me.

"David Uley, are you sneaking in without giving your Mother a hug?" Momma asked as I passed Jesse room on the way to mine and Mark's.

"Sorry, Momma," I whispered, going into the room to hug her.

She gently placed a sleeping Jesse in her crib and smiled down at her, then kissing her fingertips and pressing them to Jesse's nose.

"Sleep tight, sweetie pie," she whispered.

Then she turned to me and wrapped her arms around my waist. It was so funny to be taller than Momma. For most of my life, she had always seemed larger than life, stronger than any woman I knew, and when it came time to find my other half, I knew she would have to have the same spirit as my Momma. That's why imprinting on Trisha seemed so normal to me. Trisha and Momma were a lot alike, though I'm sure Trisha would deny it. They both loved their families and knew what it was like to hurt them. Mark and I knew the story about Momma, Dad, and Aunt Leah. In a lot of ways it mirrored the situation Trisha, Ethan, and I were in, the only difference being that Dad eventually got Momma.

Momma turned and reached on her tippy toes to cup my cheek. "I am so proud you are my son," she whispered.

"And I'm so proud you are my Momma," I whispered back to her, kissing her cheek.

I could see her eyes start to tear up. "Don't cry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry," I said.

"I just can't help but feel that we did this to you," Momma said through her tears. "That if your Dad and I hadn't imprinted, if his life was with Leah, that you would have your Trisha, no questions asked."

I wasn't going to lie to her and tell her that I hadn't thought that before, how much I thought this was some karma-shit come to bite me in the ass.

"I wouldn't want that. Because then you wouldn't be my Momma," I smiled at her.

Aunt Leah was great and all but she hated having to deal with us kids. Especially Jesse, now that she "belonged" to her brother. I couldn't imagine her being my Momma. I couldn't imagine anyone but Emily Uley as my mother.

"I love you, David. You deserve better than this," she sighed.

"Better than Trisha?" I asked.

She shook her head. "No, you and Trisha are perfect compliments of each other, even if she refuses to say acknowledge that. I meant that it should have been easier for you. You shouldn't have to fight so hard."

"What'd ya mean 'we're perfect compliments of each other'?" I asked her arching my eyebrow for dramatic effect.

Momma giggled and let go of me. "Well, you know how much Trisha loves her Daddy. You are quite a bit like Paul, actually. You will do anything for the woman you love. Paul used to be so different. The slightest thing would set him off, and his anger resulted in lots of wolf fights. I remember times your Dad used to have to practically order Paul and Jacob to stop fighting. It was non-stop fur flying. Paul wasn't a fun person to be around. But then he imprinted on Rachel. He became a different person. Sure, he still pissed Jacob off and he's still a pain in the ass most of the time, but he's also softer and kinder than he once was."

She looked at me and smiled. "You, my dear son, are a different person now than you were before you imprinted. Your grades have improved, because school is something that's important to Trisha. Your auto-repair skills improved, because Trisha needed your help with her car." I flinched a little at the thought of the car, the car I built with our family in mind. "See, you should hate her for that, for using you like she did. But you can't. The old David would've. The old David wouldn't have thought twice to tell her off and go about his merry way. But the person you are now, Trisha's David, you can't hate her. You've tried, but you can't. You love her too much."

She was right. I did love her. Despite trying really hard not to, I couldn't _not_ love Trisha. Every time I started to think something bad about her, I would feel my heart pull a little and the feeling was gone. I didn't even have to be near her to feel the pull. I would feel it at school or at home, when I was miles away from her. She literally was my life now. Nothing else in the world mattered, as long as my imprint, my Trisha, was happy and safe. I had the safe part down, but the happy part wasn't really working in my favor the last few months. I'd never really sat down and talked about how her rejection made me feel. I just…hoped. Hoped it would get better with time, and when I thought it was becoming something, it was just a lie.

"Why can't she love me back?" I whispered, actually praying I wasn't going to cry.

"Oh, sweetie, someday she will. I know it. I know you and I know Trisha, trust me, I _know_ Trisha. It may not be this week, it may not be this month, hell, it may not even be this year, but she will. She already does love you, just not quite as intensely as you love her. And, knowing Trisha, this won't be the last of the heartache she'll cause you. The question you have to ask yourself is 'Am I ready to do whatever I have to to never truly lose her?'" Momma knew I needed her to tell me this was all going to be worth it someday. I needed her to help me fix this, fix Trisha.

"I am. I…think she just needs more…time," I said, still trying not to cry. "She's coming over tomorrow, if that's okay. Wants to see Jesse."

"Of course! Trisha's always welcome here. Anytime, you know that." Mom scoffed at me.

"Thanks, Momma," I kissed her on the cheek and then headed to my bedroom.

I stripped down naked (when your body runs at 108, you try to not wear clothes whenever possible). I crawled in bed, pulling the flimsy sheet over me. Just about the time I thought I was going to doze off, I heard a knock at the window.

_What the fuck?! Who's knocking on my damn window at four in the morning?_ I thought to myself. If this was one of my wolf brothers, he was SO getting an ass whooping!

I didn't even bother to throw boxers on. If they wanted to interrupt my beauty sleep, they got what they fuckin' deserved, even if that meant seeing me in all my naked glory.

I threw open the window. "What the fuck do you…" I started but stopped. It wasn't a pack brother. It was my petite princess dressed in a simple lacy lavender nightgown. It was a gown I had grown to love, seeing it cling to her various different times over the months. She always wore it when she had had a good day.

"I couldn't sleep. I was cold," she said, trying really hard not to look at any part of me but my eyes.

I reached under my bed and pulled out a pair of boxers throwing them on quickly.

"Can I stay with you tonight?" Trisha asked.

"Anything for you, dollface," I pulled the window open more and put my hand out to help her in. She took it and smiled at me.

"I like when you call me dollface," she said before she kissed me on the cheek.

I smiled at her, taking her hand and leading her to my bed.

"You're going to stay with me, right? You're not going to leave, right?" she asked. My heart cracked listening to her voice quiver.

_Damn you, Ethan, _I thought.

I didn't say anything. I threw some clothes around on the floor, finding the shorts I had on earlier. I pulled the little scrap of paper from the back pocket and handed it to Trisha.

"Read this," I whispered to her.

She read it out loud. "Estoy aquí. Nunca le dejaré. Yo soy tu's."

"I am here. I will never leave you. I am your's," I said to her softly.

Trisha threw her arms around me waist and pulled me to her as hard as she could. Then she moved her fingers to my chin, pulling me down and placing a very soft, innocent kiss on my lips. It was just what I needed, just what she needed, and I could have stayed just like that forever. It was very Trisha.

"Thank you, David. Thank you for everything. I don't let you know how much you mean to me," she said.

"No sweat, dollface," and she smiled at me again.

I laid her down on the bed, helping her get settled. I laid a pillow on the floor and started to lie down.

"What are you doing?" Trisha asked.

"Going to sleep," I said. Duh!

She looked confused, scrunching her face a little and making her doe eyes water a bit. It was a look I knew well, having it myself many times. "You don't want to sleep with me?" Trisha asked letting me hear the hurt in her voice.

I smiled at her, "I didn't know that was option, but hell yeah."

I laid down next to her in my practically miniature twin bed.

"Will you hold me?" she asked, her voice sounding so small.

I rolled on my side, throwing my arm over her, and pulling her closer to me. I kissed her hair and listened as her breathing slowed and she drifted off to sleep.

This…This was my purpose in life. To keep her safe and warm. To love her no matter what. To make her pain stop. This was no longer about passing on a wolf gene or about imprinting. This was about the one person that I knew, at that moment, I loved, genuinely 100%, no mystical forces involved, loved. I loved Trisha with every single part of my wolfy existence…

I must have fallen asleep right after her, and woke up to Mark shaking me.

"Dude, what the fuck?" I said, whispering.

Mark had the silliest, creepiest grin on his face. "Please tell me this is not post-coital cuddling."

"I don't even know what that means," I said.

He chuckled, "After sex hugging."

Trisha stirred, rolling over to face me. She snuggled closer into me and ran her hand down my bare chest, before hitching her leg over my hip. "David," she moaned.

_Oh, dear God, I would give anything to hear my name said like that for the rest of my life_, I thought.

"Don't worry. I'll keep Momma and Dad out," Mark said walking out the door.

I rubbed her back, soothing her into a deep sleep, hoping eventually, someday, I would get to wake up to her beautiful face, everyday until my heart stops beating.*NEXT CHAPTER: "Pillow Talking"


	17. Pillow Talking

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids, except Jesse. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**I'm overwhelmed at the response to this story! I'm so happy you guys continue to like it and review! **

**Very, very special thanks to yay4shanghai for being the most awesome beta on the face of the planet and a majorly cool person and to KupKakes09 because she rocks and I bounce a lot of ideas off her through our late night e-mails! Don't forget to show them some love! **

**Also, check out these other authors: She's A Boozer, Zuzak, Augustblack, and NataliaNicolette. **

**WARNING: There are numerous mentions of oral sex in this chapter. If oral sex offends you, turn back now! You have been warned!**

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Chapter 15: "Pillow Talking"

TRISHA'S POV

When I woke up I felt safe. I felt safe and warm and, well, loved. I have never doubted it, since the imprint, David's love for me. I knew he did and I knew a part of me loved him back. Maybe not the same kind of love, but I needed time to figure that out.

He was holding me close and it felt nice, his massive frame clutching my petite body. I looked at his face, examining the lines, and letting his snores lull me to an awakened relaxed state. I couldn't help but stare at him. He even slept with a goofy smile on his face. I brushed a few stray hairs from his forehead and ran my fingers down his cheek.

I knew he would be waking up soon. Only a few days of school left, and I had to admit, I was sad to know I wouldn't be riding to school with David and Mark next year. It was definitely going to be lonely without them next year.

I traced David's lips with my finger, kissing my fingertips and then placed them on his cheek. I watched him stir and then open his eyes.

"Morning, Dollface," he mumbled. I don't know why I liked it so much, but I loved that he called me "dollface." It made me feel special and beautiful, something I had been lacking since the exodus of Ethan.

"Good morning, giant man who morphs into a wolf," I said, trying to keep a straight face.

He laughed. "I give you dollface and that's the best you can come up with?"

"Give me a while and I'll think of something," I sighed.

He rolled over and glanced at the clock.

"You need to get ready for school," I said, feeling very motherly.

He nodded. "I'll stay with you if you want. I can skip."

"No, you need to go. Just a few more days left, so make them count," I said.

He smiled at me. "Can I come get you after school? You want to see Jesse, right?"

"Yeah. I need to get home before the 'rents wake. I'll be in deep shit. They already think I'm entirely insane," I said, rolling my eyes.

He rolled on his back and I hitched my leg over him to get out of the bed, the bed that was pushed against the wall, practically trapping me. The intention was just to step over him but I stopped for a minute, straddling him. _Hello Morning Wood!_ I thought, as I felt him underneath me. As much as I knew it was wrong and way too soon, the hormonal teenager came out and I relished the feeling of him pressed hard against me, only my panties and his boxers separating us.

I couldn't help it. I was looking so deeply into his eye seeing all the love there. I grinded my hips against him, feeling him harden more and feeling myself get wetter.

"Ahhh…" He groaned, licking his lips, and moving his hands to my hips.

He didn't take his eyes off of me, but a look of confusion replaced the admiration that was previously there. He swallowed hard. David knew I shouldn't be doing this, that I was only concerned with the pleasurable feeling between my legs and not the emotions that came with going any further.

"Trisha," he said, almost like he was reprimanding me. "I think you probably need to get home."

Yet another rejection! It's not like I wanted to have sex with him. I just needed to feel…good, euphoric, pleased, etc. I looked down and then pulled myself off of him. Instead of the pleasure I was hoping for, I felt shame and hurt.

"Trisha. Wait. Dollface," he was calling after me but I just kept walking to the window. I was too embarrassed to look at him. "Please stop."

I did, but kept my head down, staring at my bare feet. "I'm sorry. I didn't…I don't know what came over me…I just needed…" I couldn't think of a nice way to explain that I was basically being selfish and using him to get off.

"Trisha…" He stood next to me, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. "You don't think I wouldn't love to rip your clothes off and fuck you 'til Tuesday?"

_Wow, _t_hat was graphic._

"Cuz I would." Now he was trying to avoid eye contact with me. "But we've got stuff to do before we get to that stage, stuff to talk about and deal with."

I was amazingly surprised at how responsible and adult-like David was being. He was taking this, us, seriously, and I felt bad, knowing that he didn't want to screw it up, and that my heart still didn't completely belong to him. I guess part of it did, but not enough for me to want to make love to him for anything other than pleasure. He was right, though. I needed to get a lot of stuff out in the open before I thought about intimacy with anyone.

"Listen, I'll come get you after school. We'll come see Jesse and you can stay for dinner, if you want," David said. I could hear the nervousness in his voice, his fear of rejection.

I turned and kissed him on the cheek. "Of course, Dimples."

"Dimples? What the fuck?" He said, laughing.

"You know, because you have such a beautiful smile and those cute little dimples," I said, blushing.

"I can deal with that," he said, helping me crawl through the window. "I'll be by at 3:30."

"I'll be there," I smiled.

I would, of course, be there, seeing as how I had no intention of leaving the house other than to make my way to David's anytime soon. I wasn't ready for it, the looks people would give me, looks of either pity or disdain—I didn't know which was worse. As much as Ethan was shamed for his actions, a lot of people, including most of the wolf-girls, my mother included, knew this dilemma, this chaos, had its roots in me. It definitely wasn't a good feeling considering the fact that I had spent most of my life adoring the wolf-girls and yearning for the day I could join their ranks.

I made my way home swiftly, crawling through the window, and sliding into bed just in time to hear Dad open the door. I closed my eyes pretending to sleep.

"Baby girl?" He whispered, loudly.

I pulled my knees to my chest, listening as Dad walked over to me. He moved a few stray strands of hair from my face, kissing my cheek, and saying, "I hope you have a better day today."

I listened for him to shut the front door and relaxed.

"You can stop pretending now, Trisha," Mom said from the doorway. She eyed me suspiciously. "Where could you possibly have gone last night?"

I kept my position on the bed. She walked over to me, raising her voice, "Answer me, dammit!"

Mom never, ever yelled at me. Even when I got caught drinking with the younger wolves or even when I broke her porcelain wolf that Dad gave her right after he imprinted. _Fuck!_

"Please, Trisha-bug, talk to me." Then it hit me. She wasn't mad, she was worried, scared.

I rolled over and looked at her. "Mom, am I a disappointment?"

She scrunched her forehead. "Why would you say that?"

"I heard you say I was out of control. Right after _he_ left, you told the wolf-girls I was out of control. I'm a disappointment, aren't I?" I was ashamed of myself, so surely the people who loved me the most must feel the same.

I could tell that she was thinking, trying to figure out what she needed to say, how she could break it to me without doing severe damage. "You aren't a disappointment, Trisha. Remember? I've told you a million times, nothing you do will ever change my love for you. Am I frustrated with your decisions? Yes. Disappointed with you? No."

I felt anger…I had gone so long feeling only desperation and pain that the anger was a welcome emotion.

"Quit it! Just say it! Tell me you hate me! Tell me I'm the selfish, miserable bitch, I know I am! Tell me how I've ruined everything! How the Wahallas would be better off if I never existed! How one dumbass girl like me has managed to fuck over the entire pack!" I couldn't figure out why I was yelling at my Mom, of all people, but she did. She could see the tears rolling down my face and knew this was everything I had needed to say but hadn't.

"You done?" Dad walked in. _Oh, fuck_…_Dad does not like when Mom gets yelled at by anyone!_. Last year, a cashier at Newton's got fired for slightly raising her voice at Mom. Dad was so furious he called Mike Newton, the manager of the store, and demanded the girl be fired ASAP or he was calling the Better Business Bureau and the Attorney General. That was someone he didn't even know. What would he do to me, his family, for talking to his imprint like that?

He walked over and plopped down on my bed, causing the mattress to shift. "Trisha, that's an awful lot of blame for one girl to take."

"But it _is_ my blame to take, Dad," I said.

"Honey, if you think this little bit of imprint confusion is going to end the pack than the pack has done a shitty job of giving you faith in us," Dad said, chuckling.

Mom took my face in her hands and forced my eyes to look at hers. "This is not all your fault, sweets. Ethan knew what he was doing was wrong, sneaking around with you. But, I'll be the first to admit, that he loved you so much that it didn't matter." She took a deep breath and looked at Dad.

"She's right, ya know. Ethan did love you and it's not hard to know why. You are a jewel in the pack's crown, honey. You practically helped raise half those little wolves. The pack is stronger because of you, and it will continue to strengthen as you grow older," Dad said. In my mind, he was referring to the fact that I would be popping out Alpha babies soon. Babies with wolf blood from both sides of the fam.

"Dad, you have to quit assuming that I'm going to have David's kids and make the pack stronger," I sighed.

"That's not what I meant. No matter who you choose to have a family with, your strength and your love will make the pack stronger." He smiled at me. "Now, I would want it to be David, you know that. I know I haven't been the most fair Dad over the last few, oh, years, and I'm sorry if I ever said anything to hurt you. My only request is that you give David a chance, sweetie. He's not a bad guy. Not the sharpest tool in the shed, but a good guy."

I smiled at him. Mom hugged me and kissed my cheek. "Is David coming by this afternoon?" She asked.

I nodded. "He's going to take me to see Jesse."

"Why don't you take a long bath and relax? Then, if you want, you can work on some of your school work, unless your plan is to fail out of school, which I doubt," Mom said.

I agreed and, after a long, relaxing bubble bath, I worked to make a dent in the pile of three months of homework left for me to finish.

"Spanish, check. History, check. Everything else, no check. At least it's a start," I said to myself.

I heard a chuckle behind me and turned to see David leaning against the doorframe.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey, yourself," I said back to him, leaving my spot on the floor to hug him.

"Ready to go?" he asked as he offered me his hand. I took it and followed him to the kitchen.

"Bye, Mom! I'll be home later," I said.

"Have fun!" she called to me as we rushed out the door.

The ride to David's house was quiet and peaceful. I spent most of it looking out the truck window admiring the green scenery, it had been months since I had last really noticed it. I rolled the window down and closed my eyes, breathing in the salty air, and remembering David's scent. I grabbed his hand, intertwining our fingers, and giving him a slight squeeze. And I smiled, a good genuine, loving where I was, smile.

The moment we walked in the Uley's door, I could hear Jesse cooing and my heart broke a little, knowing I had missed out on a lot of major things in her life. Okay, not a lot, she was only five months old. But I had missed a lot of that. This was the time I was supposed to be building a relationship with her, so when she got older I could be that cool adult she comes to with all her problems.

I heard voices coming from the kitchen and it scared me a little. I wasn't ready to see people and I could tell those voice belonged to some of the pack. I tried really hard not to peek and identify the voices, but my curiosity got the better of me. There at the big kitchen table sat Mark, Taylor, Embry, and Seth. _No! No wolves! I can't see them right now! _I thought to myself.

"David, I don't know if this is a good idea," I said, softly, trying to stand behind him.

He looked at me for a second in confusion, a look I had come to identify quite easily with David. Then, like a light bulb went off, he spoke. "I'm sorry. I really didn't know they were all gonna be here. You want me to make 'em leave?"

They were laughing and I could hear Emily asking them if they wanted cookies.

_Okay, Trisha. Remember that you want to be good for the pack. You can't kick them out everytime any of them come near. They're like your brothers, right?_ I thought.

"No. They can stay," I said, not moving from my position behind him.

He walked slowly towards to the kitchen.

"Hey!" Embry said. "Hey to you too, Trisha. We can smell you, you know?"

I looked from behind David. "Hi," I whispered, my cheeks blushing at being caught trying to sneak around the wolves.

They laughed, as Taylor said, "I haven't seen anyone blush that much since the day we broke into David's porn stash!" David was looking at Taylor, shaking his head with his eyes wide, running his hand near his neck. A clear warning for Taylor to shut up.

I looked at David, "Porn stash?"

"Thanks a lot, Taylor," I heard David say under his breath.

Porn? Really? "I want to see it. Where is this stash?" I asked David.

He shook his head at me, "No, no way!"

I looked at Mark. "Where is it?" Mark smirked. He knew I was going to find it one way or another and telling me would make this go much smoother.

"In our room, under his bed," Mark said, chomping on a cookie.

David growled as I took off for his room, followed by Mark and Taylor.

I squatted down on the floor, digging under the bed, finding the treasure trove of lust. "_Sisterhood of the Traveling Panties_? _The Unfuckables? Slumdog Gigolo?_" The titles were disgusting enough. I couldn't help it though. I was curious, just what exactly did David need to see to get off? Not that I had any intention of doing anything to get him off, I wanted my naïve eyes to see what we women had to compete with. I picked up the one with the most colorful cover: _Thank You for Fucking_.

"Please don't, Trisha," David begged. I think I might have scowled at him.

I put the DVD in the player and sat down on David's bed, followed by Taylor and David, watching Mark shake his head and excuse himself from the room.

The screen lit up on the TV. _Holy Mother_! I thought to myself. _That is what men fantasize about_. I watched as a guy push, a cosmetic surgically altered woman on the bed, spreading her legs, and plunging into her. She moaned, he moaned, the word "fuck" was said a total of 99 times in 10 minutes, and I was horrified and, honestly, frightened.

To this point, I had never seen a porn film. That's not something you exactly encounter in everyday life, especially as a girl. I knew men watched them, otherwise there wouldn't be a whole industry devoted to spending millions of dollars for their production. But seeing it in that manner evoked several emotions. First, I was angry at the portrayal of the woman. Second, no one, and I mean, no one actually has sex like that, at least I don't think they do. And, third, I would never be able to have sex with David if that's what he expected. I did not look like that girl and I could never get my legs to twists the way hers did.

David knew it was coming. The thing my Uncle Jake had once called "the wrath of Trisha." I turned to him, really scowling now. "David Samuel Uley, that is the most disgusting thing I have ever seen in my life!"

"Trisha…" I know he didn't think he was going to get to talk, not this time.

"Shut it!" I yelled at him.

"What the hell is going on?" Emily asked. As soon as she walked in, she turned right back around crying, "Oh. My. God!"

"Women are not objects to be ogled over and only appreciated for the perfect structure of their tits! And, just in case you didn't know, _**hers**_," I said pointing to the overly bosomed 'lady' on the screen, "are nowhere near real. You should be ashamed of yourself! Is that what you want? Is that what you expect sex to be like?" Then I did it. I pulled out the trump card, the one thing that could hurt him the most. "When I did it, it wasn't anything like that!"

He flinched and he looked as if someone had kneed him in the groin. David's eyes looked miserable and I had to get out of that house. I couldn't stand to see his pain. I was sorry for saying it the minute it came out of my mouth, but at the time, I was making a point. "The wrath of Trisha," remember? There are no rules as to the word diarrhea that can come out when I've been provoked.

"Okay, Trisha, I think that might have been a little uncalled for," Mark said, coming back in to turn off the movie. David wouldn't look at me. He looked down at the ground, then across the room, anywhere but towards me.

"Mark, will you take me home, please?" I asked, needing to get out of that damn house before I felt more remorse.

Mark looked at the hurt in David's face. "Sure, let me get my keys."

I flipped my hair and stormed out of the Uley house, not even getting to see Jesse. I slammed the truck door while Mark got in.

"You seriously need to relax, Trisha. You're going to break my vehicle and this is currently the only mode of transportation I possess," Mark said, being his usual serious self.

I huffed. "Sorry." I pouted, too, adding to the drama.

"You know, you really shouldn't keep saying hurtful things to David. It won't work, you know," Mark nodded pulling onto the main road and heading towards my house.

"What won't work?" I asked, intrigued.

"I know what you're doing. You think if you push him away you'll break the imprint. It won't work, Trisha. He won't ever stop wanting you, physically, mentally, spiritually, you are it for him," Mark sighed, keeping his eyes on the road.

Honestly, at the time I said the things I did, I didn't mean them to sting quite so much, but I was angry. "I don't know why I got so mad. It's not like I'm exactly the purest of females," I said. And then it hit me…I wasn't disgusted with just the images I saw. Being the hypocritical bitch that I am, I was upset that he fantasized about someone else in that way. Then I started thinking about his previous relationship with Mallory, who I despised, by the way.

I didn't know exactly what all they had done, but knowing Mallory and the whore that she was, I wouldn't have doubted he had long ago given it up to her. Why did that intimidate me? I mean, hello, I wasn't a virgin anymore. Gah, why was I thinking of sex and David? This is ridiculous.

"Have you had some sort of revelation? I can see the wheels turning from over here," Mark said. Mark loved his brother very much, and though Ethan was actually closer to him, now that Ethan was gone, Mark reclaimed his spot as David's closest friend and adviser.

"Is David a virgin?" It was sort of a "speak before you think" thing and I immediately threw my hand over my mouth.

Mark chuckled. "Why do you want to know? I thought you two were 'just friends.'"

"Oh, come on, Mark. Just tell me!" I was getting anxious now.

He pulled into my driveway and turned the truck off. "You need to ask him about that." I hopped out of the truck. "You're coming to graduation tomorrow night, right? We're having a big party afterwards."

"I didn't know anything about it," I lied. I knew all about. I think David had mentioned it to me a few nights back. But seeing the pack, all together, was not something I was looking forward to, in addition to the fact that it should also have been Ethan's graduation.

"I know you don't want to come because you will have to see everyone. But it would be very therapeutic for you. You would just get it all out of the way right then and not have to worry about seeing everyone individually," he said, eyeing my nervousness. "The Wahallas are supposed to come. Your parents are coming. Grandpa Billy and Charlie will be there."

As if mentioning the people that would be there was supposed to make this easier?!

"I have to think about it," I said, waving and running to the door.

The truth of the matter was that I did want to go to the party, mainly to support my friends. I was really proud of Mark and David but exceptionally proud of David, who if you had asked me a year ago, I wouldn't have believed could graduate kindergarten, but now he had managed to graduate high school with mostly A's and B's the last few semesters. And Mark was the valedictorian of the class, quite a feat for a boy that spent most of his nights out patrolling. I didn't quite know if I could bring myself to face it all though. I'd spent the last almost three months never leaving the house, not really talking to anyone but David and occasionally Mom, Dad, and Mark. I hadn't even seen Grandpa Billy in awhile.

I wouldn't go to the Uleys tonight. I would have to endure a night without David's warmth and figure out what I wanted to do. I already had gifts for both David and Mark. (I actually had one for Ethan, too. I had ordered them all in December, back when I knew exactly where Ethan was and I could have cared less if David was a virgin or not.)

As I crawled into bed, I could hear rustling under my window. I pulled it open to see the wolf outside.

"What'd you want, David? I'm very sleepy and I'm still mad at you and your degradation of women, so unless it's uber-important, you need to go," I said, trying to sound authoritative. Him being in wolf-form should have scared me. I nearly died when Dad phased in front of me. But I wasn't really afraid of David. Ever. I knew he wouldn't hurt me, because in hurting me, he would ultimately hurt himself. The wolf laid down, putting his muzzle to the ground, and closing his eyes. I guess this was his way of spending the night with me, even if it didn't involve us in the same room. I left the window open, listening to his canine snores lull me to sleep.

When I woke in the morning, it was a different wolf that sat on my bed.

"Trisha, up now!" Mark said. "Please do not make me roll you out of bed!"

"Dammit, Mark! Don't you have school?!" I yelled back at him, pulling the covers over my head.

"No, remember I'm a genius, so I came to spend the day with my little sister," Mark laughed.

I pulled the covers down and pushed my middle finger in his face. "One more smart-ass comment and I swear to God I'll kiss you!"

"Ha! Ha! Let's poke fun at the gay wolf," Mark scoffed at me.

"I'm sorry, Mark. I didn't mean it to sound like I was making fun of you. You know, if I had a big brother I would want it to be you," I said, leaning my head on his shoulder.

He laughed softly and kissed my forehead. "I actually do want to spend some time with you. You look like you could use someone to talk to."

Oh, I did. I needed it, but I wasn't sure that Mark was the right person to confide in. After all, his brother was going to be half of the things I needed to discuss.

"I won't tell David, if that's what you're worried about. He's my brother, but I know you have some issues you need to work out, without him. Don't feel like you have to hide anything from me. I've had my own secrets, you know." Mark wrapped his arm around my shoulders. I looked at him. His eyes were so sincere and I knew I could trust him. Mark took in a deep breath and I started. "How do you give a blow job?" I just blurted it out. He choked on his breath.

"Why are you asking _me_ that?" He asked.

"It's not because you're gay. I just thought, that since you're a male, you would know what it's like to have one and maybe you could give me some pointers. Mallory did it to him, didn't she?"

"How do you know that?" he asked, scrunching his eyes a little.

"I just had a suspicion," I whispered. "Mark, I'm so confused."

"About what, sweetie?" I still had my head on his shoulder and I wanted to just cry and let it all out.

"Mark, I…I do…I do _love_ David. It's confusing but my love for him grows more everyday. He does so much for me and I really… I want to make him feel appreciated," I managed to stutter.

Mark moved me to look at him. "And you think oral sex is going to do that?"

I shook my head. "I don't know! I love David…I just…" Mark cut me off.

"But you still love Ethan, right?" Mark asked.

I nodded. "Yes, and I feel like every time I'm with David, whether I'm just sitting with him or laying next to him in bed, I feel like I'm betraying Ethan."

"That's normal. You guys were together for a really long time, and hell, before the imprint, we all assumed you two would have a nice, happy life together. I can tell you this though, Trisha. Like I said last night, David will never not love you. You could run over his foot, whilst driving his beloved truck off a cliff, and he would still think you hung the moon. You have to learn to trust him," Mark said.

"I trust him. That's not the problem. It's Ethan. He's always there. Always in the back of my mind," I put my head down, trying to stop any tears that were forming. Mark rubbed my back and leaned down next to me.

"This is what I want you to do. Just for today, I want you to try to put Ethan completely out of your mind. Don't think about him, don't think about your time together. And if he creeps into your thoughts, I want you to think about the look on David's face last night when you made the comment about having sex. You try to pretend like seeing him like that doesn't bother you, but I saw your face, Trisha. You were remorseful. Please, just try it," Mark said softly, still rubbing circles on my back.

I owed that to David, right? It wasn't fair for me to push Ethan away, to force him to leave, and then not do everything to make it worth it.

"I'll try it," I whispered.

Mark got up and walked to my closet. He threw the doors open and started moving clothes around before pulling out a favorite purple dress of mine. He smiled and brought it over to the bed. "You _ARE_ wearing this to the party tonight. David likes you in purple."

"I don't even know if I'm going to the damn party," I sighed.

Mark laughed. "You're going. I know you. You want to do this for David. Plus," he said drawing out the syllables, "Jesse will be there." I loved how the Uley boys smiled just at the mention of their little sister's name. That made it even more flattering that Mark already thought of me as his sister.

"I love Jesse!" I announced. I sat up and leaned against him again. "You haven't answered my question yet, about the blow job."

"Ugh! Why, for the love of Jacob Black, do you want to know that?" Mark looked utterly disgusted.

I took a deep breath. "I want to know everything you know about what Mallory and David did and didn't do together."

"They didn't have sex, if that's what you're curious about. You've got him beat in the virgin area. That said, however, I'm pretty sure they did everything short of penetration. That girl had zero inhibitions when it came to anything sexual related," Mark shook his head.

"Don't tell David I'm coming to the party. I want to surprise him," I smiled at Mark and couldn't wait to see the "David-smile" when he saw I had left my cocoon of safety to celebrate his big day.

"I've got to go practice my speech but promise me you'll be at the party tonight. I'll be extremely heartbroken if you don't show," Mark said, kissing me on the forehead and climbing out my window.

I still had no idea about blow jobs! Mark was absolutely no help in that department at all. So, if I chose to do it, I would have to wing it, improvise, pretend I knew exactly what I was doing, while having no idea at all.

I spent the day trying to make myself look as beautiful as possible. I painted my fingernail and my toenails. I curled my normally straight-as-a-board hair and spent extra time on my makeup. I put a few things in a smaller clutch handbag and slipped my feet into my shoes before twirling around in my dress.

"You look beautiful, Trisha-bug," Mom said, coming into my room.

"Thanks, Mom," I said, grabbing the two gifts from my desk and starting to walk out.

"Wait just a minute, sweetie. I want to talk to you before we go." She sat on the bed and patted it for me to join her. I did as she asked and she put her arm around my shoulders.

"Sweetie, I know tonight isn't going to be easy for you. You've been cooped up for three months in the house and I'm worried about what seeing everyone is going to do to you. But I want you to remember that they are your family. While some might not exactly be cordial to you, no one has stopped loving, okay?" I hated when Mom was really serious like this. It put a damper on my spirits and things I hadn't really worried about, like will Kim hug me or hit me, started to fester in my imagination, basically scaring me shitless.

I nodded to her as Dad walked in. "Ladies, your chariot awaits."

I spent the drive to the Uley house thinking about what I was going to say to the Wahallas, if I would even be allowed near them. I would find out soon enough, as we pulled in the Uley driveway less than five minutes later. I could hear the pack talking and laughing inside, Sam's voice exuding pride in his sons, Seth cooing over Jesse, Mark and Taylor sharing a joke, and David, talking to someone whose voice I didn't recognize right away.

I walked into the house, keeping my head down, not wanting to look at anyone, afraid of the emotions on their face whether that be hatred or pity. Dad grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze. "Go find your boy," he whispered. I nodded and looked for David.

"Yo, Trisha!" I turned to see Taylor sitting with Mark. "Aren't you even going to say hello to me? Or have you exiled me, as well?"

I smiled at him, as he stood up, opening his arms, waiting to embrace me. "I've missed you, Trisha," he said hugging me to his chest.

"That's funny…I thought you hated me," I smiled. Taylor laughed, "just a little."

Mark replaced Taylor, hugging me, as I handed him his gift. "Congrats, Einstein!" I said.

"Thanks. David's in the kitchen," he whispered, kissing my forehead.

I skipped to the kitchen, not seeing Kim or Jared anywhere. David was standing at the counter, with his back to me. I started to walk up behind him to scare him when I saw a pair of hands wrap around his waist and move up his back, nicely manicured hands with beautiful silver bangle bracelets attached to the wrist.

"David. I miss you, I need you. Just a quickie in your room. She doesn't have to know," a nasal toned voice begged. Her hands moved from his back and I heard an unzipping sound. "I know you want me too."

David responded to her. "Mallory, stop! I'm sorry, I don't feel the same anymore. I belong to Trisha now."

He belonged to me…_He_ belonged to _me_…_He _was mine. All I had to do was want him. I felt…nothing and everything, all at one. I felt loved but I also felt anger and worry and fear and confusion.

I watched Mallory's hands reach around David again, grabbing the waistband of his pants and sliding her hands down the back to grab his ass.

"I believe he said he didn't want you!" I yelled. I yelled at Mallory? Why the hell did I care if she wanted to give him what I couldn't, or wouldn't, or was too afraid to? But then I knew why, as David turned to me, giving me the thing I had been craving all day, my "David-smile." And then I knew I was going to have to return the favor by reverting back to the actress I was. I sauntered over to David, standing on my tippy-toes, and kissing him full on the lips. I snaked by arm around his waist, and he was all too eager to pull me close.

"What the fuck?!" Mallory yelled getting closer to me.

"I would advise you to back up, Mallory. This will not end well. I've seen how Trisha hit and it ain't pretty," Mark said from the doorway, arms across his broad chest and flanked by Taylor and Seth. Damn wolf hearing!

"_You_," Mallory said getting closer and closer to me before ending up in my face, "are nothing. The only thing you are good for is breaking hearts and fucking your boyfriend's best friend." She turned to walk away, fury boiling in my chest. "At least with me, David, you were getting a little something in return for all your trouble."

Yeah, so, that was the trigger, the thing that pushed me over the edge. I moved away from David and ran up to Mallory as she turned to face me.

"Can I help you?" She scoffed in my face, spitting an little and making me gag.

So, I did the true Trisha thing. I balled my right fist and connected it to her cheek. "It's 'may' not 'can,' you dumb bitch!" I yelled at her.

"Dude, this goes in the books as the best party…ever," I heard Taylor whisper to Mark, as Mark chuckled and then walked to pick Mallory up from the floor.

I turned around to see the whole pack, the wolf-girls, and the wolf-kids staring at me all with varying looks of hilarity, David still leaning against the counter, putting his hand over his mouth to hide his grin.

"What are you smiling about, Dimples?" I said, trying to hide my embarrassment.

"That was H-O-T hot, Dollface," David said picking me up, twirling me around and then carrying me outside. I couldn't help but laugh. He sat on the porch and pulled me into his lap. I took one look in his eyes and I was gone.

My lips couldn't get to his fast enough. I pushed myself closer, wrapping my arms around his neck… "_He belongs to me_," I kept thinking to myself. He deepened the kiss, pushing his tongue to my lips, and letting me respond by opening my mouth and letting out a soft moan. He moved his mouth, kissing my jawline then down my neck, stopping to suck on the skin just before my collarbone. It was a wonderful feeling, a sensation I had only experienced while having the spot behind my ear sucked on. I could almost have an orgasm just from David's hot mouth on me like that.

"David…that feels so..."I couldn't control my breathing and I wanted more of him, more of anything that could give me that feeling. Then David suddenly stopped.

"Footsteps," he whispered.

"Uh, guys, I hate to break this up, but we kind of need David for pictures and gifts," Mark said.

"We'll be right there," David said, kissing me on the cheek. He pulled me close again. "I haven't watched any of those movies since you started giving me a chance, since we went on our first date."

I smiled at him and nuzzled his neck. "Will you come stay at my house tonight?" I asked.

He laughed and kissed my hair. "Duh. Now let's go in there before your Dad comes out to steal you from me."

I watched as they opened gifts (both appreciating my gift of handbound, embossed leather journals), and a couple of the wolves made Mark repeat his speech from graduation, a combination of humor and philosophy, something Mark was always good for.

I watched David throughout the night, seeing the pride in his eyes every time someone congratulated him, but more so when someone congratulated his brother. I tried very hard not to think about Ethan, not to wonder where he was or what he was doing, knowing he would have put some slogan like "Save the Wolves" or "Free Tibet" on his mortarboard taking it off to show everyone as he walked across the stage.

Emily took pictures of David and Mark, arms around each other's shoulders, smiling. Then one with the twins and Jesse, both of them holding her up for the camera. I knew that Ethan would have loved that, to see his best friend so happy. They took a picture of the present-pack, then another adding the "retirees" in it, as well. The reunited Wolf-Girls stood posed for a picture, sans Nessie but including Kim, who grabbed my hand to pull me into the picture with them.

"You're a wolf-girl now, too, remember?" She said.

_Yeah, but exactly whose wolf-girl am I?_ I thought.

The final picture was one of me and David. We stood next to each other, our arms around each others waist, one of my hands on his chest, smiling at the camera. After the click, David leaned down and kissed me very softly on the lips. I heard the shutter go off again on Emily's camera.

Being the party-animals we are, the Wise family were one of the last to leave. Mom and Dad climbed in the car, Dad driving as Mom had had one too many Cap n' Gown Cosmos, as Claire called them.

"I'll be over in just a little bit. Let me change clothes and I'll be right there," David whispered in my ear, grabbing a hold of the lobe with his teeth, earning a groan from me.

I had a one track dirty mind that was now filled with what I wanted to do when David got to my house. I ran to my bedroom, mumbling good night to Mom and Dad and stripping down, putting on my lavender nightgown. As soon as I slipped it on, I heard David prop the window open.

"Hey," he whispered as he crawled in my bedroom, the only clothes he had on being a ragged pair of cut off sweats.

Me, being the horny teenage girl I am, couldn't control myself. He no more than pulled the window closed and I jumped on him, throwing my arms around his neck, wrapping my legs around him, and crashing my lips to his. He jumped back a little, stunned by my eagerness to be near him, to touch him, to feel him. I pushed his mouth open with my tongue and bit his bottom lip, pulling it a little, as he moved his hands, grabbing my ass.

He pulled away first. "Shit, Trisha!" He shouted softly. "Are you trying to kill me?"

I just pulled myself closer to him. "Go to the bed." I said to him. And just like an Alpha command, he couldn't refuse me. He stumbled backwards, falling onto the bed, as I pulled my legs away, straddling him. I kept kissing him, occasionally grinding my hips against him to feel him harden. David suddenly rolled us, so that he was on top of me. His lips never left mine, as he ran his hands down my sides, pulling the gown up from underneath and surrounding my body with warmth.

"David…"I moaned as he pulled away to lift the gown over my head. He stopped and looked at me, stared at me, and my instincts made me want to cover up.

He stopped me. "Trisha, dollface, you're amazing. You are the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life," David whispered and I almost thought I saw a tear forming.

I smiled at him and put my hand on his cheek. "Thank you," I whispered back, running my hand down his chest.

David kissed my neck, then moved down, placing kisses all the way down my chest, to my stomach, then back up stopping at my breast. His hands groped them as he ran his tongue in a circle, first around the right nipple and then the left. I gasped and arched my back, feeling an electricity run through my body.

But tonight wasn't supposed to be about me. Tonight was about David. I pushed him off of me and started to push him to the side. "On your back, Dimples," I whispered, licking his neck. He smiled and complied.

I started to feel nervous, and I knew David could sense it. His brow furrowed and he petted my hair as I sat up. "What's wrong, honey?" he asked, as I looked at his magnificent torso, thinking to myself how much like a work of art he was. I thought that even Michelangelo could see that this was the true _David_, the vision of the perfect body, the warrior-guardian for his people. "I would never ask you to do anything you don't want to," he whispered, scooting back on the pillows to sit up a little.

I took a breath, mustering all the courage I could, before kissing two of my fingertips, touching his nose and then trailing my fingers down his chest, stopping at the elastic band of his sweats. I knew, like all the wolves, no other article of clothing would be under those pants. I licked my lips, looking in his eyes, as he watched me, slowly and unsteadily pull the elastic down. His eyes didn't leave mine as I continued to pull, freeing his already hard, thick erection.

I swallowed hard, raising up to kiss his lips one more time, before shuffling down to straddle him just below his knee caps. I looked at his erection again, wondering exactly how I was going to do this.

"Trisha, you don't have to…" David started, but I cut him off as a wave of courage hit me and I licked the tip of him, removing the moisture already present. I didn't look back at him, as I ran my tongue down his length, then raising up to take as much of him as possible in my mouth.

"Ohhh, fuck…"David whispered, his breathing getting deeper. I moved my head up, slightly scraping his length, as he let out a low moan. I pushed my head back down, using my tongue to surround it. I felt him start to buck and twitch as his moans became slightly louder, deeper, and more frequent. "I'm not gonna last too much longer, dollface. I'll tell you…Oh, shit…I'm…"

And I knew he was about to let go. I had to make a quick decision of what to do, pull away and let it happen or stay where I was and swallow it. I chose the latter, myself emitting a moan and feeling his whole body tense, as I ran my hand up his chest.

"Ohh, ohhh, ohhhh," and I felt him release in my mouth. I closed my eyes, trying not to think about what it was I had in my mouth, trying to come up with a description of its taste. It was sweeter than I had imagined, and I cringed a little as I swallowed it down. I put my mouth back on him, using my tongue to lick up any residue left from my experiment.

Then I looked at him again. There I sat, my breast exposed, and feeling insecure all of the sudden. It all melted away as he gave me a "David-smile." He pulled me up to him, clutching me to his chest, as I placed soft kisses on his neck.

"Where'd you learn to do that? Wait. Don't tell me," he whispered in my hair. I giggled a little.

"I didn't learn that anywhere. I just listened to you. When you moaned, I knew that was something good, so I did it again," I whispered back to him.

I could see a little bit of guilt in his face. "So that was the first time you've done that?"

I nodded. "I never thought about it before," I said, very softly, almost unsure of myself.

"Not that I didn't enjoy it, but you didn't have to," he said, running a finger down my chest.

We laid there for about an hour, not saying anything, just breathing and relaxing. His scent was intoxicating, and I felt a little like I was at the cliffs, overlooking the majestic sea.

Then the pillow talk commenced. "What are you doing now that school's out?" I asked him.

He let out a little laugh. "I'm working at Embry's garage on the weekends. I'm looking at maybe starting out in construction. I really want to be a contractor."

I pulled up and smiled at him. "You'd be really good at that. You're a born-leader."

He smiled back. "Yeah, I guess I kinda am. I'm worried, though."

"About what?" I asked.

"Stuff. I don't know if I'm smart enough to be in charge of a crew of people. What if I fuck up? Then, I'm not just responsible for me but my workers too, ya know?"

It worried me that he didn't think he was smart. Sure, that reputation was partly my fault, since I had spent everyday for years, convincing everyone around me that a Thanksgiving ham had more brains than David Uley. He wasn't dumb. I hadn't given him the credit he deserved. He was brilliant in his own right, the way he could fix the flat on a car in under 5 minutes, or make anyone's day better with just a smile.

I kissed him again. "I have faith in you, David," I whispered into his lips.

He pulled me away from him and looked me in the eyes. "I have to say something to you. If I don't say it now, I'll regret it. Trisha," he diverted his eyes a little, "I love you."

_Fuck! How was I supposed to respond to that?_ I thought.

Suddenly my night of happiness and bliss became a lot more complicated.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Fireworks"

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**Second AN: So, I'm not one usually in to posting pictures of what characters look like or their outfits, but I'm going to post a link for Trisha's graduation party dress on my profile. Hope you like it!**


	18. Fireworks

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids, except Jesse. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**I'm overwhelmed at the response to this story! I'm so happy you guys continue to like it and review! **

**Very, very special thanks to yay4shanghai for being the most awesome beta on the face of the planet and a majorly cool person and to KupKakes09 because she rocks and I bounce a lot of ideas off her through our late night chats! Don't forget to show them some love! **

**Also, check out these other authors: She's A Boozer, Call Me Embrys, Zuzak, Augustblack, and NataliaNicolette. **

**WARNING: There's a lemon in this one! You have been warned!**

**P.S. I totally listened to "Butterfly" by Jason Mraz—it beyond drips sex!**

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Chapter 16: "Fireworks"

TRISHA'S POV

_He pulled me away from him and looked me in the eyes. "I have to say something to you. If I don't say it now, I'll regret it. Trisha," he diverted his eyes a little, "I love you."_

_Fuck! How was I supposed to respond to that? I thought._

_Suddenly my night of happiness and bliss became a lot more complicated._

I looked deeper into his eyes and I had to say it. "I love you, too, Dimples." And I did. As much as I might try to deny it or curtail it, I loved him. Very much. I started to wonder if it was possible to love two people so much. His smiled melted me and the feeling of my mostly-naked body to next to his completely-naked body gave me goosebumps.

"What 'bout you, Trisha? What do you want to do when you graduate next year?" I smiled because he had never, ever asked me about my future before. Probably because it hurt him too much to think it would be devoid of him.

"I want to go to college. Not far from here, I was thinking maybe Port Angeles," I said as he smiled back at me. "I want to be a teacher. You know, here on the rez, help with the next generation of wolves."

He stroked my hair and kissed my forehead. "You would be perfect for that. I love how you are with kids, especially Jesse. I hope that doesn't make me sound sexist."

"Not at all. I do love kids, and I do want to be a Mom someday, but I want this for myself first. Does that make me selfish?" It was strange for me to be so open and honest about this with him.

David chuckled at me. "Nope."

I ran my hand along his abs and felt him twitch a little. "David," I whispered in his ear, "You are so unbelievably sexy." I kissed his shoulder, and moved my hand down to his happy place, as he grunted.

"Woman, you're gunna kill me!" He said, rolling on top of me. "Can I return the favor?" I wasn't completely sure what returning the favor would entail, but what the hell, it's not like I was going anywhere. I nodded to him and pulled his lips to mine, before he pulled away and started trailing kisses down my chest.

"Can I tell you something without making you mad?" He asked.

"Sure," I said.

"I think your, uh, boobs are, uh, prettier than any of the girls I saw on the movies," David said nervously.

I ran my fingers through his hair. "Thanks…now back to work."

"Yes, ma'am," David said, returning his lips to my stomach. His kisses were sublime! Warm and loving, yet passionate and moist. He moved farther south, circling my belly button with his tongue, causing me to arch my back into him and moan.

"David…more," I lost control of my speech momentarily. He growled and kept kissing, all the way down to my right hipbone then moving to my inner thigh. He hooked his fingers into the hem of my panties, looking at me for permission to continue. Of course, I nodded and gave it to him. Every spot once covered by my lavender panties, was now covered with David's kisses.

David used his shoulders to spread my legs, leaving me fully exposed to him, as I felt myself getting wetter. He ran his tongue down my thigh, reaching my core, plunging in. He moved his tongue to my clit, circling it, and causing me to feel like I was about explode.

"David…that feels so… don't stop," I managed to moan out.

He moved back to my core and growled. That did it! I felt my stomach tighten and my walls clench, as I struggled to breath. Then his tongue made its way inside me and I let go, letting my orgasm take control of my body.

"Fuck!" I almost screamed and David moved really quickly to cover my mouth.

"Shh…Do you want your Dad to catch us?" He whispered.

Too late. I heard Dad's feet hit the hardwood and come running to my room.

"Shit!" David whispered, grabbing his pants, throwing them on and then literally jumping out the window.

I couldn't find my nightgown, so I pulled the covers completely over my head, hiding from him.

"Trisha? You asleep?" Dad said.

I didn't move, just slowed my breathing a little.

"I told you, you were imaging things," I heard Mom say. "Now, come back to bed, you big overprotective wolf."

"I'll be right there," Dad said. Mom scurried along but Dad didn't move. "I smell wolf," he said clearly talking to himself. He heard him moving around and sniffing. "Definitely a Uley…" Still talking to himself. He got closer to the bed, and I tried not to move. "Hmm…Very interesting…"

I heard Dad grab the phone next to my bed and dial a number. "Sam, hey, it's Paul. Do me a favor and check to make sure David's in his room…I know it's two in the morning but I can smell him all over Trisha's room and it's fresh…No, she's asleep…I just know, okay… Are you sure it's him and not Mark?...Let me talk to him...I don't give a shit! Wake him up!" I heard Dad pause for a second and take a deep breath. "David Uley, were you just in my daughter's bedroom?...Don't 'no, sir' me, I can smell you all over…And when was this?... Uh-huh…Fine…David, son, you know I like you, but if I so much as catch you eyeing a part of my daughter's body with lust, your Dad won't have to worry about you passing on the wolf gene, if you know what I mean…okay…Night, Sam…"

It took every ounce of strength to keep from cracking up laughing. I could tell Dad was dissatisfied with himself, as he let out a huff and slammed the phone down.

The next morning, at the breakfast table, as Dad shoved in forkfuls of pancakes and bacon, he eyed me suspiciously.

"So, Rachel, I called the Uley's last night. David was fast asleep in his bed, but I could swear I smelled him all over Trisha's room," Dad said, trying to be coy.

"If you want to know something, why don't you just ask me?" I said.

Mom choked on her orange juice and looked at Dad's face. We stared each other down, before Dad gave up and went back to his breakfast. The doorbell rang soon after and Dad looked pissed that he was being dragged from his feast.

"Oh. Good morning, David," Dad said, with no emotion in his voice.

I got out of my seat and ran over to him, throwing my arms around his neck. "Good save," I whispered very low. He laughed a little.

"David, would you like some breakfast?" Mom asked, as Dad grunted and covered the plate of pancakes in the middle of the table. "Stop it," she said, slapping him on the wrist.

David was a good sport. "No, ma'am. Thanks, though." He smiled at me and gave me a quick peck. "Wanna go cliff-diving with the pack today?"

"No, I think maybe I'll stay here and do some stuff around the house," Dad said. Did he really think David was asking him?

"As much as I'm sure the pack would love to see the infamous Paul Wise cannonball, I'm pretty sure that question was aimed at Trisha, my dear," Mom said, patting his hand.

Dad mumbled something that started out as, "back in my day," then drifted off.

"I would love to. Let me go get my suit," I said, walking off to my room. David grabbed me by the wrist and pulled my ear to his lips.

"Wear the purple one," he whispered, sending shivers down my spine. I complied with his request, slipping on a purple tankini and throwing on a pair of cutoff and flip-flops.

"Be home for dinner," Mom yelled as we ran out the door to David's truck.

He held my hand and I snuggled into his side as we drove to the cliffs. He stopped a little before we reached our destination.

"I wanted to talk to you about last night," he said, looking me in the eyes. "Umh, it was…"

"Horrible?" I asked, suddenly insecure and worried by the way he said 'Umh.'

"Oh, God, no," he grabbed my face in his hands. "No, I wanted to tell you that it was like the most awesome thing I've ever felt and that I don't want you to think, though, that you've got to do that to keep me, you know?"

I smiled at him and kissed him. "I know that, David. I don't want you to think that either." I looked down. "Can I talk to you, really talk to you, about stuff?" I said, feeling like I might cry.

"You can always talk to me about anything. Even if it pisses me off a little, I'm still gonna listen to you," He smirked.

I pulled myself closer to him, needing to feel his warmth more. "David…you know, I'm not a virgin, right?" He growled and balled his fist.

"Nevermind. You said you would listen," I said, frustrated and started pulling away. But he grabbed me.

"I'm sorry. It just still gets to me, you know. Seeing it from Ethan's perspective and all," he said.

"What do you mean, 'seeing it from Ethan's perspective?'" I was confused now. I knew that David knew Ethan and I had slept together but as to how he ascertained that knowledge I didn't really give much thought. I could tell that David was hurting, even thinking about the memories of his lost friend and me.

"He sorta showed us. When he phased. I saw you, your face, when he was…fucking you," David kept his eyes down, looking at his lap.

Why would Ethan do that? What we shared was special?

"I'm sorry…" I whispered, now looking down at my lap, ashamed of what I had thought was the most loving experience of my life.

David's huge finger met my chin and he pulled my face to look at him. "Trisha, as much as you know I'm mad at Ethan right now, he didn't show me that to hurt you. He wanted to piss me off." He sat silent for minute. "It worked, by the way. I wanted to kill him right then, but I knew you were out there suffering and I needed to help you, so I went to get you instead."

"Thank you," I said scooting closer to him. He pulled me into his lap and held me, just rubbing my back and kissing my neck.

"I love you, Trisha," he whispered in my ear, sucking on the patch of skin just below my earlobe.

"I love you too, David," I whispered back, turning my head to face him and kissing his lips. Then it hit me. If Ethan showed them everything we had done, then was it safe to assume that David would too? Because I really didn't want the pack to know I had sucked him dry last night or that he had a magical tongue that could push me into oblivion. "Will they see it? Everything we've done?"

He took a deep breath and sighed. "I'll try to keep out as much as I can but sometimes things just slip."

"Just try, please. I don't want them to think I'm, I don't know, a slut or something. I wouldn't do any of the things I've done if I didn't love the person I did them with," I was worried again. I was going to return to being the reservation tramp, and I had finally started to get the trust back from my Dad.

"I know that. I'm not happy that you and Ethan, you know, did it. But I know that you loved him. And what we did last night was love, you know," He said. I kissed him chastely on the lips and nuzzled my head into his neck. We sat like that for ten minutes before Mark knocked on the window.

David rolled it down. "May I help you?" He asked.

"My curiosity got the better of me and I wanted to make sure you hadn't devoured the poor girl," Mark said.

David laughed. "There you go with them big words again. Me, I'm just a simple kinda guy."

I smiled and pulled David's lips to mine. "I love your simplicity." I felt him smile as I kissed him again.

"Please refrain from sexual relations in front of wee children. It's disturbing, to say the least," Mark huffed.

"Do we look like we're having sex? Cuz we could totally show you what it should look like if ya want," David said sarcastically to his little brother who then scrunched his nose.

"I'll pass but thank you anyway," Mark said, hopping into the bed of the truck. "Onward, ho!"

"Don't talk about David like that!" I shot back, smiling and laughing.

"You so did not just call me a ho!" David said.

"Yes, but you're my ho," I said sweetly kissing him on the cheek.

In less than five minutes we made it to the cliffs. The wolves had already started diving, while several girls stood around watching them, and squealing as the wolves would tackle them with their wet bodies. I recognized one of the girls as a bitchy princess I'd seen in Forks. Then another was Tiffany. She was a pretty girl that I knew David had dated before Mallory. Unlike Mallory, Tiffany was actually sweet and seemed genuinely happy to see David happy.

Most of the next few weeks were spent time hanging out with "my wolf-boys" (David, Mark and Taylor). David got a job working as an assistant to a contractor in Forks, an old friend of Charlie's. He spent his days there, then his evenings on patrol, before making his way to me at night. On the weekends, he would occasionally help Embry out at the garage, when things got busy, and I loved watching him work, his tight button up Dickies shirt and matching navy pants. I tried to keep listening to Mark and kept Ethan at the back of my mind, but I still loved him too.

It became customary for me to spend afternoons at the beach, sometimes taking Jesse to play in the sand and water. Claire would come home every now and then and go with me. But one day in mid-June, I was by myself. I packed a lunch to take to David at the garage, and just wanted a few minutes to relax before I saw him. I sat on the driftwood, watching the relaxing pattern of the waves come in and then back out of shore. I saw a figure out of the corner of my eye, moving and kicking rocks. He was holding the hand of a toddler, not quite sure of her walking abilities yet.

"Uncle Jared!" I yelled to him and waved, trying to get his attention.

He looked to me and smiled, scooping up Annabelle and coming to meet me.

"Hey Trisha-bug! How are you? It's been a long time," he said, giving me a one armed hug while cradling Annabelle in the other.

"It has! Too long," I said. I turned my attention to the little girl in his arms. "And look at you! You've gotten so big! I can't believe Brady let you out of his sight!" I tickled her belly softly as she giggled.

"Who 'dat, Daddy?" she asked. My heart sunk. She didn't know me. She didn't know who I was. Then I wondered, if she didn't know who I was, would she remember Ethan? Would he just be a blur to her?

"Baby Belle, you remember Trisha," Jared said trying to smile at me and ease the tension.

She scrunched her face up. "In pichure with E-fan," she said.

"That's right," Jared hugged her.

He looked at me, seeing how my demeanor had changed. But I tried to shake it off, to put Ethan out of my mind, by remembering the look on David's face.

"How's your Dad, Trisha?" Jared asked cuddling the squirming Annabelle to his chest.

"He's good. I think he misses you, though. You should stop by and see him sometime," I said. Prior to the imprint mess, Paul Wise and Jared Wahalla were thick as thieves, besties till the end of time. They were best men at each others' weddings and not many photos of Dad existed in our house without Jared by his side.

"Maybe I'll do that. Tell the folks hey for me. I'll see ya," and then he and Annabelle walked away.

David must have sensed my anxiety when I arrived at the garage. He picked me up and kissed me chastely on the lips. "You okay?" he asked. I nodded to him and leaned in for another kiss.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, move it to the break room, love birds," Embry said, as I blushed.

David took my hand and kissed it. "Come on, Dollface."

I sat with him while he scarfed down his lunch, winking at me.

I leaned forward on the table and kissed him on the lips. "Does this door lock?" I asked him.

He scooted the chair back and moved to lock the door, closing the blinds. I sat up on the table and eyed him as he walked over to me. I widened my legs, letting him fit into space between them, as he took my lips in his. I roughened the kiss, wanting more of him, and begging for his tongue. I slipped my shirt off and his right hand grabbed my breast, squeezing it, as I ran my hand to the zipper on his pants. He moaned and I felt myself start to drip between my legs.

"How long do you have?" I whispered in his ear, pushing my hand into his boxers, pulling him out.

"A little while," he whispered back. I bit my bottom lip, as he pushed my legs farther apart, pushing my mini-skirt up.

_Fuck! This is not how I want our first time to be, not in the breakroom of Embry's garage! What is it with me and cars?_ I thought.

"Just hands, honey, nothing else yet," he said. _Well, in that case…_

I grabbed his erection and pulled, hard.

"Fuck!" He groaned. I pulled him closer between my legs and started grinding my clothed, wet core against him. It didn't take long, as I heard the familiar change in his breathing. His kisses got rougher and he started thrusting his hips. _OH. MY. FUCK!_

I started to feel myself tightening. "Ooh…ahh…don't stop, honey," I moaned to him. I licked his neck as his grunts became more frequent and his hand slipped under my bra. He kept pulling me closer and I felt him shudder a little.

"Go ahead, sweetie," I said, sucking on his neck.

"Fuckity fuck fuck fuck!" He moaned, moving himself to my thigh, spilling onto me, his hips still thrusting. "That was…wow! So hot…"

I giggled at him, though I had to admit I was a little disappointed I didn't get a chance to finish off the experience. I moved to pull my skirt back down when he grabbed my hands.

"You think we're done? Not even close," David said, kissing me. "Layback."

I complied, as he spread my legs, bending them at the knee and placing my feet flat on the table. Very quickly, he pulled my panties off, kissing my thighs, up and then down, moving his hand to my slit, putting his thumb on my clit, and gently, very gently slipping a finger in me. "Oh, shit, David…" He moved his thumb in a clockwise direction then moved his finger in then out. He added another finger and I felt my orgasm coming.

"Faster…ugh, David…" I moaned out at him. He pulled one of my breast out of my bra and sucked on the nipple. "Ooh… ooooh!" And I let go into his hand, pulling him down and biting his now exposed shoulder.

We both started to laugh as we came down from the high.

"Quit fucking on my table and get the hell back out here, David!" Embry yelled, banging on the door.

"Holy shit! He's not gonna tell our Dads, is he?" I asked him, my eyes as big as stoplights.

David laughed again and kissed me. "No, honey. You're my imprint, I think he'd careless what we were doing." He pulled his boxers up and zipped his pants back up.

He grabbed my panties from the table and slipped them in his pocket. "Mind if I keep these?" He asked, kissing me again.

"Umh, I guess not," I said still kissing him.

He lifted me off the table, as my knees buckled a little. "Whoa, Dollface, you okay?"

I giggled, again. "Yeah, just a little drunk, I think." He grabbed my hand and proceeded back to the garage. Embry stood under one of the cars, eyeing us, as I heard Sam clear his throat.

"Fuck," David said very low under his breath.

"David, Trisha, can I speak to you two in the breakroom, please?" Sam said.

"Umh, Dad does Trisha really need to stay?" David asked.

Sam shook his head at us. "Yeah, she does." David pulled me closer as we moved back to the breakroom. Sam took a breath and then turned up his nose, shaking his head. "Actually, Trisha, why don't you step out for just a sec."

I did as Sam asked watching him shut the door behind him.

"David, son, you are walking a thin line, boy. This room smells of sex. What would you have done if I was Paul, huh?"

"I don't know, Dad. I guess we'd have dealt with it," I heard David say.

Sam laughed. "You know, I really don't care what the hell you two do. We tried the sex talk a long time ago with Quil and, well, you two are old enough to make that decision, should you choose. I just want you to know, I'm not covering for you anymore. No more lying to Paul, got it?"

"Yes, sir," David said. I liked hearing him talk to his Dad with such admiration. I knew David loved his Dad and that Sam was his hero, but listening to him, so much respect and awe in his voice, was amazing. I instantly smiled and Embry laughed.

"I see you over there," Embry smirked. "I never would have pegged you for a girl that got off on authority."

"Shut up!" I yelled at him picking up an old magazine and throwing it at him.

The door to the breakroom opened and Sam wiggled his finger at me, beckoning me in. I walked in sheepishly to see David leaning against the table, the table that we had just defiled. He looked down at the ground, giving me a slight smile. He put his hand out and I took it, still not looking at Sam.

"Trisha, did you hear what I said to David?" Sam asked, speaking much sweeter to me than he had to David.

"Yes, sir," I whispered, keeping my head down. Sam chuckled.

"Sweetie, you're not in trouble yet. Just keep an eye out for your Dad. And, guys, be careful, you know what I mean? Be careful." There is nothing more embarrassing then your boyfriend's Dad talking to you about sex, especially when that Dad happens to be like a second or third or fourth father to you.

Sam left almost immediately after the "discussion" and I followed soon after. I smiled to myself when I pulled up in the driveway to see the Wahalla minivan parked next to Dad's Tahoe. I smiled even bigger when I walked in the door to see Jared sitting in the recliner next to Dad, yelling at the television. "Why the fuck would you pull the pitcher this late in the game?!" Dad yelled.

"What the hell are they thinking? It's no wonder the Cubs have the worst record in the league!" Jared yelled.

"Ah, for the love of Jacob Black, a fuckin' home run!" Dad yelled.

"You stole that from Mark! He says that," I said. Dad and Jared laughed.

"I think the Cards have this one in the bag, bro," Jared said, as it seemed the men were ignoring me. It also seemed like no animosity had ever existed between the two of them. They were like I had always remembered, a little more tense and grayed in the temple area, but the same goofy guys, hanging out, watching sports.

Kim sauntered in two beers in her hands. "Boys, try to watch your goddamn mouth around the kids, would ya?" She tossed the beers to the guys before catching a glimpse of me. "Well look what the wolf dragged in! Trisha Mortimer Wise! Girl, you're looking hot this summer day!" She hugged me and kissed me on the cheek.

"I sure have missed you, Aunt Kim," I said, as she hugged me. I tightened my hold on her, not wanting to let go for fear she'd never hug me again.

"Sweetie, I'm not going anywhere," Kim said. I still wasn't convinced but for the moment things seemed reconciled and it was nice to see old friends reunited.

The Fourth of July would be the true testament to the strength of the reconciliation. Everyone would be at our house, the Wahallas, the Uleys, the Clearwaters, just like every year. I was giddy at the sight of Dad and Jared hanging out with the other wolves, drinking beer and grilling meat. It seemed like old times, minus one important person…Ethan. _No you're not going to think about him! Remember David_!

And as I thought that, David rounded the corner with Jesse in his arms and a smile on his face. He kissed my cheek and then helped Dad at the grill, which I found oddly sexy, watching him try to figure out the perfect time to flip the burgers. I couldn't help but smile when he played football with the wolf-kids, trying really hard not to hurt any of them worrying as he put it, he "might squish them like a grape."

When the sun set in the west and the night sky was dark, the fireworks began. David sat next to the wolf-kids on the ground, anxiously awaiting each new colorful explosion. He pulled me to sit on his lap and I was all too happy to follow his orders. Not five minutes into it, being so close to him, I couldn't keep from kissing him. The kisses started out sweet and innocent before becoming passionate, hard, and loving. It was driving me insane!

I knew if he kissed me again with the same passion and love, I wouldn't make be able to hold out any longer. I listened as the group enjoyed the fireworks, leaning up to David's ear, "Let's go to your house, Dimples…I think we can beat these fireworks." He growled and lifted me up, carrying me away from the party to his truck, kissing me.

His hands were everywhere on my backside, groping at my ass and I pushed into him harder, knowing tonight was it. Everything we'd held back was going to break away. He slid me into the seat, climbing in next to me and starting the engine. David was generally a pretty responsible driver, however, tonight, that all disappeared as he sped down the road from my house to his. I kept my lips on various parts of his neck, licking and sucking, wanting any part of him so badly that I even picked up his hand, holding his finger and sucking on it.

"Shit, Trisha! You're gonna make me cum and we're not even to the house yet," he said.

"Honey, I plan on making you cum more than once tonight," I whispered in his ear.

"You really are trying to kill me, aren't you?" He asked laughing, pulling into the Uley's driveway, as I sat in awe knowing no one else was home and wouldn't be for quite some time.

David pulled me out of the truck and I attached myself to his front, locking my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck. Our tongues moved together and I licked the roof of his mouth as he growled again. He threw the front door open, our bodies still intertwined, as he walked down the hallway, pushing me against the wall, ripping off my sundress and moving his hot mouth to my breast.

"Do you have any idea how bad I want you right now?" I asked him. I grabbed one of his hands and pushed it to my wet core. I moaned and pushed myself harder into him.

He carried us into the bedroom and started to lay me on my back. "No! You on bottom." I said, kissing him hard and pulling his shirt off, then moving my hands to unbutton his jeans. I moved my legs and started pushing his jeans and his boxers off with my feet. He stepped out them then grabbed my lace panties and ripped them off. I threw off the final remnants of my once cute red dress and realized we were completely naked and he was hard as a rock. "Bed! Now!" I screamed to him, feeling like the caveman I had once accused him of being.

I pushed him a little to lay on his back, taking my tongue and running it from his chest down to his just above his erection. He was so beautiful and I wanted him inside me. I wanted every part of him touching me.

"You have a very dangerous look in your eyes, dollface," he said, grabbing both of my breast with his hand, kneading them and causing me to slightly rock my hips even though he was still very much outside of me.

"David…we have all night for slow and cuddly…right now, I just want you to fuck me," I moaned in his ear, listening to his breathing hitch as I lined my self up with him.

"Your wish, my command," he said, grabbing hold of my hips and slowly lowering me down.

My eyes rolled back as I took him in. "Fucking son-of-a-bitch!" I moaned out, very loudly. I ran my fingertips down his chest, listening to him groan and thrust forward a little. I knew I wasn't going to last long and I could see David trying really hard keep himself, well, hard. I rocked my hips once, then a second time.

"Fuck, Trisha! You're like a sex goddess! I can like feel you all around me, and goddamn, I…it's like the best…Oh, shit!" He screamed as I continued my rocking motion for a third time, feeling myself getting close. "Uh…uhhh…FUCK!" And then I felt him spill his baby batter inside me. I wasn't quite finished, so I grabbed his hand, moving his index finger to my clit.

"Rub, now," I said. I could feel he had softened inside me, but I was going to savor this, dammit!

Two…that's the number of circles it took his finger to make around my clit before I felt my orgasm take over. "OOOOOHHHHHHH!" I let out one loud moan, as I clenched onto him.

"Holy Fuck!" He groaned out and I immediately felt him harden again.

David rolled us, placing me on back and whispered in my ear. "Guess who's not a virgin anymore?"

I giggled a little, still feeling him inside me and wanting friction.

"Can we do it again?" He asked me, licking my neck and then sucking on my nipple.

"Yes, please," I moaned to him, bucking my hips up to show him what I wanted. He took my wrist in his hands and pulled them above my head to grab onto the headboard.

He pulled himself up, pushing deeper inside me, and I couldn't help but whimper at the sensation this angle created. I could feel his size this way and I felt much more vulnerable, as he pushed into me again.

"Uh, again, David…harder…" I said, wrapping my legs at his ass. He granted my wish and plunged into me, causing me to cry out. "DAVID!"

He increased his speed and I could hear the bed creaking below us. "I love you, Trisha. I love every part of you."

I pulled his head to mine and kissed him hard. "I love you, too…Don't stop…please…don't…" He growled from deep in his chest and I felt the bed starting to give a little and a little soreness beginning to set in. "David…you feel…so huge…"

He pulled my leg away from his, closer to his chest and I let out an animalistic type howl, as I came, sounding a little like the wolves. He pushed into me as I moaned and withered under him, hearing the bed give one last creak, before hearing it collapse on the ground.

My eyes widened, and David looked around for a second. "Your Momma's gonna kill us," I said moving sweaty hair from his brow.

He bit his lip. "Yeah, umh, she's not the only one." He said.

"What?" I asked, completely confused.

"This isn't my bed…this is Mark's," he stuttered out, still inside of me.

I looked at him, still trying to catch my breath. "No fucking way! David, he's gonna be so pissed. Shit! Shit! Shit!"

"So does that mean we're through for the evening? I mean, the damage has already been done, so why not take advantage of it," he said with a sly look on his face.

"Dear God, I've created a monster!" I moaned pulling him down to kiss me.

His kiss was softer this time. I knew he wanted me again, but this time had to be different. "David, sweetie?"

He looked at me, smiling and stroking my hair. "Yes, dollface?"

"Can I ask a favor?" I said, my voice sounding small.

"What's up, babe?" He asked me.

I was finished with fucking for the night. I wanted David, but I wanted him slow and tender, like I knew his first time should have been.

"I don't want you to fuck me," I said, and he pulled away a little defeated. "No, sweetie, I want you to make love to me. Like real love, not animalistic humping."

He smiled his "David-smile" and kissed me. "I would love to make love to you," he whispered.

DAVID'S POV

_Okay, David, you gotta go slow, dude. She wants you to make love to her, slow, slow_. This was going to be harder than I thought. The fucking I could handle, no biggie. I mean, I'm David Uley, goddammit! I'm a freakin' wolf, that's what we do, we bang our mates into next week. But being gentle, that was gonna take work.

"Kiss me, please," Trisha whimpered to me, as I pulled out of her a little. It made me so hot to listen to her good manners. She said please and I could've let my load go right then. I kissed her lips and then pulled myself off of her. I couldn't stop staring, wanting to touch every single fucking inch of her. I was still inside her feeling warm and safe. Being inside her was like sitting next to a fireplace on a cold night. It was like home.

She could the look in my eye. I was scared shitless. I had no idea how to do this. I mean, fuck, I'd just lost my virginity less than an hour ago and now I needed to forget the rough shit and love her.

Trisha sat up a little, not letting me fall out of her and cupped my cheek. She smiled at me. "You still want to do this, right?"

I smiled back at her. I wanted this, I wanted to love her, to show her how much she meant to me.

"Just go slow, sweetie, and keep your eyes on me," she whispered. Trisha kissed her fingertips, moving them to my collarbone and then down my chest. "You can do this, David, I trust you."

I took a deep breath and moved closer to her. I kissed her soft, pouty lips, surrounding them with my own, slowly putting my tongue in her mouth. Our heads moved in unison and I pushed a little deeper into her. She pushed her hips up and moved hitched her leg to my hip. I put my forehead on hers and kept my eyes focused, feeling like I could drown in ecstasy. One of her hands held on tightly to my hair, while the other softly clawed at my back. She licked her lips. "Eyes on me, sweetie," she moaned out.

I pushed in her again, softly sucking on her lips. I laid her back down gently, and placed my hands on the sides of her face, still not breaking eye contact. "Move, sweetie," she whispered.

I pulled out and then pushed back in slowly, pulled out and pushed in. She whimpered, as I sped up just a little. Her eyes widened as I moved my hips in a circle. "I need more of you," she groaned, not softly this time, but loudly. Her voice was so different like this, like it dripped with pure lust and I had to control myself.

I pulled her legs up, pushing them to the side, and then plunging in softly. She gasped! "Do you want me to do that again?" I asked her, not sounding at all sexy, just asking the question. She nodded and bit her lip. I pushed her legs wider again and rocked into her slowly. "AAAAHHHHHH," she moaned.

I liked that sound. Her pleasured moan was the best sound in the world, my Trisha loving the feeling of me inside her. This time, I didn't ask, I just moved, swiveling my hips. Around and around, my breathing speeding up, as the friction of our sweaty bodies forced my dick to twitch. It wanted to me let it go but I wasn't gonna let it win. Her breaths hitched and she must have known what I was thinking about because she smiled.

"I named him," she groaned. She was talking about my dick! She named him!

I didn't stop the rolling of my hips as I lifted an eyebrow.

"He's my Wolf." She moaned.

"That's ironic! You named my dick Wolf!" I grunted.

"You and Wolf can go faster now, please." That's what I needed to hear!

I sped up my thrust, listening to her. "So hot…my head is spinning…"

"Look at me, dollface." I didn't want her fucking passing out. How romantic is that? I needed to see her eyes, her face.

I started to thrust a little harder and deeper.

"I'm gonna cum…DON'T STOP!...FFUUCCKK., DAVID!" Her screaming my name, plus the fact that when she came I felt like my Wolf had just put on a turtleneck sweater, I let myself go.

"Trish…Trisha…SOOO RIGHT!" What the fuck did that mean? Hell, I didn't care! I finally released, grabbing onto the headboard, no longer in control of my body. With one final thrust, I pulled on the bed and then let go, hearing it smack into the wall.

I chuckled, still not being able to breathe. She kissed my almost every inch of my sweat soaked face, smiling at me and running her fingers through her hair. I didn't pull out of her as I rolled on my back, pulling her to cuddle into my side.

"Thank you," I said. "Wolf thanks you, too."

She giggled. "David, I'm gonna go sleep. Is that okay?" Her words were slurred a little, and I could tell she was worn out.

"Mmmhmm," I mumbled, watching her drift off to sleep following not far behind her.

I woke up the next morning to Trisha sucking my ear, lightly running her fingers through my hair. I pulled her closer and breathed, taking in her scent. Apples, cinnamon, and something else. It was familiar, I had smelled it on her before. What was it? My head started to hurt thinking so hard and then it hit me.

"Holy Fuck!" I screamed and pushed her a little to get out of bed, butt naked and tripping over my shorts from last night.

Trisha looked confused and hurt. "Did I do something wrong?" She asked me.

I stood in front of her and saw her eyes move down to Wolf. She licked her lips and I knew she was gonna wanna go at it again. But I had to stop it! Fuck, this was bad…

"Trisha, dollface, umh, I think we may've fucked up, babe?" I stuttered.

Her face looked even more hurt and I saw tears start to cloud her eyes. "I thought…you wanted…I…"

Shit! I had really fucked up! "No, sweetie, we didn't fuck up by having sex. That was special…it's just…You 'member how I used to have to stay away from you for a couple of days?"

She nodded. "I was in heat?" I couldn't tell if she was asking it as a question.

I started to pace now, completely naked. "Dollface…Shit! You smell so good to me right now. Do you know what I'm trying to tell you?"

I watched Trisha sit for a second and think and then saw her eyes get big. "Did you smell it last night, David?!" She was panicking now. Fuck, I was panicking now. I couldn't remember…Did I smell it and not care or was it not there?

"I don't know! I can't remember! You're on the pill though, right?" I was trying to make this alright but it wasn't working.

"No! I was but when Ethan left I was a little too distraught to remember to take birth control!" She yelled at me. I felt like she had just kicked me in the junk. She said _his_ name while she's laying naked in my brother's bed. "You know what this means, David? FUCK!"

I tried really hard not to breath too deeply because she smelled delicious and I already wanted to throw her down and fuck her, again. "Maybe it's okay…maybe it just started this morning…maybe you won't get pregnant…Yeah, maybe that's it!" Shit, I don't know if I'm convincing her or me?

She crawled out of the bed, wrapping the sheet tight around her chest. "Can I b-b-borrow some cl-cl-othes? You k-kinda destroyed mine last night." She was crying now. I needed to hold her. I wanted to. I couldn't stand seeing her like this but I didn't know if I'd be able to control myself. I had to try. I walked over to her and pulled her into my chest she started sobbing.

"It's okay. It'll be okay," I rocked her a little and kissed her forehead.

"How do you know that, David? What if I'm pregnant? What're we gonna do?" Her voice was louder now and her sobs turned into pleading.

I had no fucking idea what to do! And this ain't exactly one of those things you can ask your Momma. "Hey Momma, Trisha and I banged our brains out last night and now she's in heat. What do we do?"

I kept holding her. "How soon can we take a test?" I asked her.

She shook her head. "I don't know. That's not something that you just learn in school."

Then, I had a brilliant idea! "We'll Google it!"

I dug under my bed, throwing boxers and socks out, to get my laptop, another brilliant Christmas present from Momma and Dad last year. I sat down on the bed, still naked. "Give me the name of a pregnancy test brand," I said to Trisha.

She looked at me. "I don't know…umh, First Response."

So I typed it in the magnificent search box waiting, as it took forever for the page to load. I clicked the link. "Ooh, okay, here is says First Response can tell us five days sooner!"

"What the fuck, David? That doesn't help! Five days sooner than when?" Trisha snapped at me.

Okay, I could see the flaw in that now, but at the moment, I thought it ingenious. We were back to square one. I googled again, typing in "how long do you have to wait to take a pregnancy test." This time it was more accurate. "Okay, it says about three weeks after ovu-ovu-lation."

Trisha nodded. "If I'm in heat, I'm ovulating now."

"So we wait three weeks?" I asked her.

"We wait three weeks," she sighed.

It was going to be a very long three weeks…

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Diarios de América del Sur"

**Second AN: Okay, funny story, the Google First Reponse comment about "five days sooner" actually happened when KupKakes09 and I were chatting. I asked her how long you had to wait to take a pregnancy test and she was like "I'll Google it." Then she said "First Response can tell you five day sooner. WTF?! That doesn't help." I told her I was soooo putting it in the story!**


	19. BONUS CHAPTER: My Son the Horn Dog

**AN: Sam and Emily Uley belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, David, and Mark. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she's cool like that!**

**Very, very special thanks to yay4shanghai for being the most awesome beta on the face of the planet and a majorly cool person and to KupKakes09 because she rocks and I bounce a lot of ideas off her through our late night chats! Don't forget to show them some love! **

**THIS IS HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU GUYS: So I wondered what it would be like for Sam and Emily to walk in mid-Trisha/David sexfest. And I wrote it out for you all because, well, you all rock my socks! **

**P.S. If Sam Uley were Chaske Spencer and I were around, Sam wouldn't have to worry about not getting any…if you know what I mean…**

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Bonus Chapter: "My Son the Horn Dog"

SAM'S POV

All I wanted was to put my daughter in her bed, have sex with my wife, and call it a day. But, hell no! That would be too easy! Being the father of twin boys and a little baby girl has taught me never to expect easy. I heard it pulling into the driveway. I should've turned the damn car around and sped off to Billy's. Hell, no…My curiosity got the fuckin' better of me.

"Is that David's truck?" My beautiful wife asked.

"Seems to be," I said, getting out of the Suburban. "Do you hear that?"

Emily shook her head at me. "Babe, I don't hear anything." She gingerly lifted the sleeping child from her car seat as I moved closer to the front door.

I listened, hard, harder than I'd listened to anything in awhile. Moaning…grunting...No way that was coming from my house. But the door was wide open. I felt Emily behind me.

"What the hell is that?" She said, finally picking up on the sound.

I smelled sex. Shit!

"_Uh, again, David…harder…"_

I closed my eyes and rubbed my neck, turning to look at Emily.

Her eyes were about to pop out of her head as she pushed the baby into my arms, walking towards the hallway. She picked up a tattered piece of red fabric, her mouth agape, her eyes still huge.

"Babe, I think you better not go any further," I whispered but she stuck her hand up.

"Shh!" She said.

"_DAVID!" _

Oh, great, now the beds creaking! My son's gonna break the fucking bed!

"_I love you, Trisha. I love every part of you."_

Emily looked horrified. And I think she might have stopped breathing momentarily, listening to our son defile the girl who's diapers I had once changed.

"Go David!" I heard from behind me.

"Mark! Zip it!" I snapped at him.

"_I love you, too…Don't stop…please…don't…"_

Then I heard a growl and watched as Emily put her hands over her face.

"Is that the bed creaking?" Mark whispered.

"_David…you feel…so huge…"_

Now, as a man and a father, I felt a little pride in that statement, until I realized that it was being moaned out by a 16 year-old girl, whose father could very well kill my son if he found out.

Emily was now sitting on the floor in the hallway, Mark still behind me stifling a laugh, and the baby in my arms looked at me like we were all insane.

My thoughts were interrupted by a howl, not from outside, not from a wolf…

"Was that Trisha?" Mark asked me.

"I don't want to think about it!" I said, handing Jesse to him and moving to pull Emily off the floor.

I watched my wife's face as we heard a loud grunt and the POW!

"Holy shit! They broke the bed!" Mark was now cracking up. How they couldn't hear us, I have no idea.

I listened, hoping they were finished, having no idea how I would look Paul or Rachel in the face, ever again…ever again. Mark was still laughing behind me, putting Jesse on the floor, as he fell on his knees.

"_Your Momma's gonna kill us."_ Clearly Trisha's voice.

"_Yeah, umh, she's not the only one."_ My soon to be grounded son.

"_What?"_

"_This isn't my bed…this is Mark's."_ Mark stopped laughing.

"_No fucking way! David, he's gonna be so pissed. Shit! Shit! Shit!"_

"Yes, yes he is," Mark said, his face very serious.

"_So does that mean we're through for the evening? I mean, the damage has already been done, so why not take advantage of it."_ My son is a horn dog. A soon to be dead horn dog.

"_Dear God, I've created a monster!"_

I prayed in my head that they were done. Emily shook her head. "He's in soooo much trouble," she said.

"Yeah, hell hath no fury like a twin brother scorned," Mark said.

"I think they're done. Let's just act like we just came in, okay?" I said.

They were still talking but I was pretty sure no more sex would be occurring in this house tonight, or probably for weeks. I continued to listen, thankful it was finished, when I heard Trisha.

"_I don't want you to fuck me. No, sweetie, I want you to make love to me. Like real love, not animalistic humping."_

"_I would love to make love to you," he whispered._

"Oh, dear God!" Emily groaned.

"Who wants to stay at Billy's tonight? Everyone, good. Let's go!" I said.

As I drove to Billy's, I made a list in my head of all things I never wanted to experience in my life. It goes like this:

Listen to nothing but Kenny Rogers until the day I die.

Watch Claire do a strip tease.

Kissing a vampire.

Eat cucumber sandwiches and scones while drinking tea with the pack.

Hear my son having animal-like sex with Paul Wise's daughter.

I guess I can scratch that last one off now.


	20. Diarios de América del Sur

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids, except Jesse. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she is the epitome of coolness!**

**Sorry it took awhile to update! School is crazy right now, with this being the last week of school and all…But you guys keep me motivated, so thanks for that!**

**Big shout out and Thanks to my very awesome friends yay4shanghai (the best beta in, well, this solar system—which I still contend includes Pluto) and KupKakes09, both of which keep me on task and give me the very best ideas! Don't forget to show them some love! **

**Also, check out these other authors: She's A Boozer, Call Me Embrys, Zuzak, Augustblack, and NataliaNicolette. **

**AND: If Spanish translations are not quite right, blame Google Translator!**

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Chapter 17: "Diarios de América del Sur"

ETHAN'S POV

"_Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment."—Prince Gautama Siddhartha, the Buddha_

As I board the plane, with the familiar wolf beside me, I pick up my diary. The first thing written in it isn't an entry. It's this quote. This quote has been my mantra during my time away from home. I had to forget about the cards I had been dealt in La Push and find my way now in the world. I had no intention of returning home, not for a very long while, not until I knew for sure that everything had blown over, that Trisha and David were happy and I was no longer a threat. My Trisha, whom I loved so much, I was willing to let her be with another wolf, because that's what she wanted. She occupies a lot of my thoughts in this diary. From the first entry to the last, the one I did last night at the hotel in Quito. The diary that is so much more than words, but my journey of self-discovery.

_***February 16: **__I had never realized how wonderful airplanes can be for meditation. Usually I have to be in a completely silent, isolated area to truly feel a sense of calm, but this plane to Quito worked quite well…Bought a book in the airport in Dallas about Buddha…Found my favorite quote and soon-to-be mantra right away. "Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." Now, I can only wonder if I will ever be able to let the past go, to let Trisha go, to lose my friendships and to let the shame I've caused my family go. Will I ever be able to truly live in the present? We shall see._

_***February 18: **__Had an epiphany today on the interesting bus ride from Quito to Guayaquil, Ecuador (where I've heard there's an organization that works to stop the deforestation in the Amazon rainforest area to the east, maybe a possible job?)…I met a girl named Zaira, she was beautiful, and I thought to myself, maybe this trip will be good for me, maybe I might imprint, maybe on a gorgeous young lady like Zaira or Aunt Leticia…That wouldn't be so bad, right?_

_***February 22: **__Not sure how long my money's going to last, but luckily I got a job today. I've been renting a room from a family here in Guayaquil, the Zaragoza family. It's really just a husband, his wife, and their three-month old daughter, as well as Raymundo, an artist from Mexico City, and Marissa, an English tutor from Florida. The family has a large house and Julietta, the wife, is a wonderful cook. I'm going to start working with Raymundo at his booth at the Mercado Artesanal art market. It should be good money and I'll get to meet interesting people. Marissa offered to take me around the city tomorrow and show me interesting sites. I have to admit, it's nice to have another American around._

_***February 24: **__Met a guy at the market today that agreed to take Raymundo and me east to check out the rainforests. He said a lumber company has been buying up large chunks of the land and chopping down whatever it can get its hands on…basically destroying hundreds of square miles of virgin land, and the habitats of animals and some tribes of peoples not yet known by others…all in a days work for those assholes, I suppose…_

_***March 3: **__I've started to settle into a routine, making my transition to life in Ecuador much easier. I tend to wake up early in the morning about 6 and go for a run (it's been great for keeping me from phasing, which I have no intention of doing, ever again). By the time I get home, Julietta usually serves breakfast. Then, after a quick bath, it's off to the market with Raymundo, where I spend my days peddling original art work and pottery. Some days we sell lots of paintings, but there have been days when we've come home empty handed, selling nothing. Julietta has dinner for us. I have yet to eat anything she's cooked that I didn't like. It's different than food back home, but I like the unique qualities of it, with my favorite being an Ecuadorian ceviche. _

___As the sun sets, and Manuel (the husband) returns home, we reflect on our days, listening to Marissa talk about her students or Manuel discuss his days working in the business district. (I have yet to discover exactly what it is he does, but it has something to do with international stocks. It obviously pays well, but not well enough to keep up the very large house he and Julietta have, being forced to rent out rooms to total strangers.) They accepted me into their little "familia" quite easily and I'm thankful for that. Though, I admit Julietta is no substitute for my own mother, who I miss more than I could ever put into words. _

___Sometimes when I see mothers with their children on the streets, I get jealous. I want to tell those children to hold onto to their mamas with all their might (and to stay away from girls that belong to someone else…but that's another story). I miss Mom's quick wit and sometimes find myself saying things that remind me so much of her that it hurts. Before I go to bed, I look up at the moon and close my eyes, remembering that the same moon is seen all over the world and hoping that maybe Mom's looking at it too, and we're sharing that moment. I miss Dad, too, wishing I could have made things right with him before I left. And my brother and sisters…Amber's hugs would sure be wonderful right now…So, off I go to stare at the moon, before crawling to bed and waiting to start a new day…tomorrow will be fun. Marissa and a few of her fellow tutor friends are taking me to the Parque Centenario for a picnic tomorrow afternoon. Then tomorrow night is Carnavale…_

_***March 5:**__I am all kinds of hungover this morning…I didn't think alcohol was supposed to have the same effect on wolves, but I guess since I haven't phased in awhile, my body couldn't really tolerate it…I've determined the reason why today, Ash Wednesday, is such a solemn day is because no one wants to make any noise because they all have splitting headaches…That's not really why, but it's a good theory…I skipped the run this morning, feeling too sick to move out of bed until noon…Raymundo took the day off from the market, saying no one would be out shopping anyway…It was intriguing watching the people pass by the window as I ate breakfast (I was the only one that ate…the others said they were fasting for Ash Wednesday)…Most of the people were either on their way to or from church, either with ashes on their foreheads, or on their way to get ashes on their foreheads, even little baby Anysabella had them…I loved observing the culture of the people here in Ecuador, even if most of it was semi-foreign to me. I was willing to learn and the people were willing to teach me…_

___Yesterday before Carnavale I went to the picnic with Marissa and her friends…the park was magnificent and a relief from the equatorial sun, covering four blocks with shade trees. We had "American food" as we called it, ham sandwiches and Julietta had made us her version of potato chips, made with purple potatoes and perhaps the most delicious thing I have ever tasted…We walked around the city and decided to plan a trip to Peru for later in Spring. We talked about politics, philosophy, conservation, you name it. They explained the influence Catholicism had on Ecuadorian culture (the majestic churches and even the celebration of Carnavale) and I told them about my decision to become Buddhist and life growing up on the reservation…It was the first time I spoke freely of my life in La Push…I drank a lot that night trying forget the life I was no longer part of._

_***March 7:**__ It's amazing the diversity of people that come through the market, everything from American tourist to teenagers skipping school, still dressed in their Catholic school uniforms, to mothers with their babies. I can actually blend in to a certain extent. It never gets old, watching the American tourists who assume by my complexion that I'm Ecuadorian. Most of the time I play along with it, wanting to watch them make fools of themselves, massacring the beautiful Spanish language. "¿Cuánto de este?" That's what they intend to say, but it comes out very loud and very poorly pronounced. _

___I love to play along, using my perfect Spanish and acting like I have no idea what they're saying when they speak in English! The other day I listened to two American college students describe my body in great detail, thinking I was clueless. I believe the exact words were, "Do you think he's that big all over?" To which the other responded, "Yum… We could find out." They both smiled as the first said, with lust in her voice, "Oh, yeah, the things we could do to him." That was the first time in my life I have been invited to participate in a "conjunto de tres." I politely declined the invitation, surprising them because not many other men on the face of the planet would decline sex with two women, but I'm not like most other men…and I was still very much in love with someone else…_

_***March 17:**__Spent tonight with Marissa and her friends at an Irish pub in the middle of the city, drinking green beer and wondering why the hell there is an Irish pub in Ecuador…_

_***March 18:**__Found out today that Raymundo had to move back to Mexico City…some sort of family emergency…so now I am unemployed…Marissa said she thinks she can get me a job tutoring even though I explained to her that I didn't even have a high school diploma. She said that some families don't mind as long as you're willing to teach and that if push came to shove, we could always lie…We shall see…_

_***March 20:**__Started my new job today, working in an orphanage here in Guayaquil, where they really didn't care if I had graduated grammar school, as long as I was willing to teach (just like Marissa said)…I am teaching English to some of the kiddos and missing home, as the students remind me so much of the wolf-kids…hoping the wolves and La Push are all safe…Marissa and I are going to dinner tonight. It's a date…I haven't been on a date, unless you call hooking up in a garage a date…We're going to dinner and then back to park for stargazing…should be fun…_

_***March 21:**__Marissa…She is wonderfully magnificent…So smart and opinionated…she laughs and I can't help but smile…she numbs the pain…We're going out again tomorrow night and then planning the Peru trip…_

_***March 30:**__Tonight, Marissa and I talked about our past relationships. She was quite surprised that I had only ever really dated one person. I didn't tell her how much Trisha had meant, still means to me. I explained that she was my first everything and that she chose my best friend over me. Obviously I didn't explain the whole concept of imprinting or the wolf thing…Marissa had her own story of love and loss. She was engaged to her high school sweetheart, who joined the military right after graduation. They were set to get married when he left for basic training, until he met some girl at a bar and decided that Marissa was not what he wanted. She left the US and headed to Ecuador. She's been here for a year and a half, trying to get over her loss…Perhaps we can be better for one another than I first thought._

_***April 3:**__Magic…Marissa and I went to the park again, watching a meteor shower. I couldn't help myself. I leaned over and kissed her softly. She was much more forceful in returning the kiss, pushing me down and straddling me. I was as hard as a rock! It was the first time I had felt this way in so long and I wanted her, but I needed to be cool about this. I wasn't going to screw this up. So, when she moved her hands to my jeans button, I stopped her. She looked a little defeated but I assured her, all in good time…she thought maybe it was because I didn't have protection, to which she made sure I knew she was on the pill…it was good information to know but not what I needed to convince me. I told her it would happen, just not yet…We continued to make out before eventually returning home…_

_***April 10:**__Peru equals perfection! It is muy bonita, more beautiful than I could have ever realized. _

_***April 17:**__I slept with Marissa last night, had sex with her, fucked her, whatever you want to say…I can't figure out how I feel about it. At the time it was wonderful, in the hotel, overlooking downtown Cuzco. We had spent all day doing the touristy thing, walking around Cuzco, listening to tour guides tell us about the Incan Empire. Everyone else had gone out for the evening…Marissa and I stayed. It started with soft kisses again, then rough kisses. _

___ She was much more experienced than me, more experienced than I had ever thought about being, and I felt my wolf-senses kick in when she leaned on the bed on all fours, begging for me to take her. I complied, thrusting into her. I could get lost inside her, feel her tightening around me, not have to worry one iota about being gentle. I was rough and she liked it. We didn't take things slow and she was all for repeat performances. Three times. Once with her on all fours, once with me on top, and once with her on top. But, then, the last time, as I was about spill inside her I did the one thing no man should ever do during sex: I called out someone else's name. "Trisha!" I don't think she was hearing clearly, because she thought I said "Marissa!" (She even said, "I love when you call out my name like that!" afterward.) I knew, though, it wasn't her that I wanted like that. She was there, a warm body to take up a tiny space in my broken heart. I like her enough. But I don't love her, I can't. _

_***April 20:**__Majestic Macchu Picchu! Who knew it could actually be a turn on? As Marissa and I stood hand in hand, both in awe at the amazing site before us, she leaned over to me and said, "Inca Schmica, I want you…" That's all it took. We had sex, her laying on the green grass of the mountain, with me on top of her. She didn't complain about my heat or the fact that we were both almost completely clothed. I didn't say anything this time, just groaned and grunted, listening to her moan, worried I might stick my foot in my mouth again. The way Marissa looks at me, I'm worried she might be thinking there's more to our whole relationship then there actually is…_

_***April 23:**__Went for a final walk through downtown Cuzco. Taking the bus back to __Guayaquil tonight…I'll be sad to leave, though I have to admit I'm ready to have the routine of my life back…Marissa held my hand all through town and I let her, kissing her here and there, becoming a bit coupley. But I don't say anything, because I have to admit that I like it. I like being in control, for once. I feel like only in a matter of months I've managed to mature and I don't see myself as the same 17-year old kid that left La Push. Sometimes I don't even call it "home" anymore…It's the place I grew up, but I don't belong there…I wasn't wanted there. At least Marissa wants me…At least I don't have to contend with the mind of an angry, possessive wolf pack…At least I don't have to sneak around for months to no avail…_

_***April 30:**__Been back in town for 6 days now, back to work at the orphanage, and talking to a few people about going east to spend a week with a native tribe in the Amazon…Who would have thought? A Quileute boy with an Amazonian tribe! Dad would be proud…Billy Black would be proud…Mark would be proud…Trisha, the old Trisha, she would be beaming…_

_***May 2:**__Marissa and I went for a walk this afternoon and she told me she's leaving next week to go back to the States. She asked me to go with her…Said she feels like we really have a connection…I was at a loss for words. I don't want to hurt her, I know what that's like. How can I explain to her that I do like her, but not enough to move away with her, I know I don't love her. She said her friends, Lucy and Vanessa, are taking over her and Raymundo's rooms. I'll be living in a house full of women! Not that I'm entirely complaining about it._

_***May 7:**__I said goodbye to Marissa today. We slept together last night, our last big hurrah before she headed back to home. I missed her this evening, wishing she were here to go to the park and stargaze with. I went by myself instead. I found a peaceful little corner, with no distractions and allowed myself to drift off, looking at the stars, then the moon, and thinking of La Push…Marissa had been a distraction from thinking of that part of my life I had lost. Now that she's gone, anytime I try to relax, La Push floods my memories…_

___It's funny to me how much I wanted and waited for years to become a wolf, so excited that it happened and that I was sharing it with my best friend. It makes me think of the talk at Quil's, where David and I plotted ways to speed up the transformation. We would have given anything to phase…it seems like a lifetime ago, and a world away. In a way it is both. I am not the same person as I was when I sat on Quil's couch telling him how much I loved Trisha and was sure that she would be my imprint…and La Push feels about as far as Mars from Ecuador. And as much as I try to tell myself that I don't miss it, or that I don't regret my decision to leave, I know that I do. I miss my family, my friends, and my wolf-brothers, even though I know they don't miss me. I recite my mantra and try to forget the past, and not worry about the future, all that matters is the present…_

_***May 14:**__Finalized plans with a local priest at the orphanage to go to the rainforest…They are doing a bit of missionary work, but I'm going to research, observe, and help with whatever I can. I leave in two days and can't wait to make my mark on the less-traveled world. If La Push could see me now!_

_***May 22:**__Returned to __Guayaquil today…didn't have time to write from the wilderness…It was amazing! I'm covered in mosquito bites and think I might have malaria, but it was quite possibly the best thing I have ever experienced! Better than sex, better than phasing, better than anything! Seeing these people, so unknown to the world, so remote and isolated, and seeing them look at my skin, seeing the similarities. The kids liked me the most and one little girl held onto me the entire time, making me think of my sisters, knowing Annabelle probably has no idea who I am…a few spoke a little Spanish and no one spoke English…They were what I imagine we Quileutes were like, long before, well we know when…It was communication at the most basic, hand gestures and pointing, but it was so sincere and the connection was unbelievable! (Oh, and I was just kidding about the malaria…I think.) _

_***May 25:**__I dreamt of my Trisha last night…God, it's been so long since I've called her "my Trisha." It was her, but not her now…she was older, she looked just like Rachel, but I looked the same…We were both smiling, we both seemed happy…she was in the garage, our garage, and her face was so serene…I've spent all day trying to figure out what it meant…No, I don't care, right?_

_***June 3:**__ ¡Viva la Revolution! Well, at least in Peru…I'm glad to have been there earlier and not now…Peru has suddenly found itself in disarray with a military coup. Something that some say has been in the makings for weeks. It has caused a huge influx of refugees to our part of Ecuador and the orphanage/church has served as a temporary home for many of them. I've helped a lot of them contact family back in Peru, and even some in the US, to let them know they've arrived somewhere safe. This afternoon one of the Peruvian refugees asked one of the boys from the orphanage who I was. The little boy said, "Él es nuestro maestro, nuestro amigo, y nuestro protector." Roughly translated it means I am their teacher, friend, and protector…it has been so long since I was referred to as a protector…I used to protect people from vampires, now I protect little children from the cruelties of the outside world…Yo soy el protector…I am the protector… and I start to embrace this path, this is my present this is my life._

_***June 17:**__Things at the orphanage have kept me busy. I haven't been writing like I should but maybe that's because there's so much I've seen and felt that I can't put it into words. The images we've been getting from Peru are not good…horrible, even, seeing old colonial buildings destroyed or converted to use by a greedy military…My work never seems to end, as I am no longer just an English tutor, but a counselor, a friend, and a protector, as well. I watched an old man, who reminded me so much of Old Quil, cry into his hands, wailing for his lost homeland. He just kept asking "why?" And the look in his eyes made me wish for a love of a homeland so deep that I could cry…Did I still feel it? Was La Push still my home? Did I have a home? Did it really matter? Could I keep denying the wolf-part of me that was my destiny? Was that my destiny?_

_***June 29:**__Military coup over…peace returned in Peru…Walked a group of kids over to a local shop to watch parts of the cleanup on television…While we were there, another TV had CNN playing and there was a story about a group of teenagers gone missing from the town of Port Angeles…Just disappeared while on a camping trip near Forks…the kids identified the area as my former home…My wolf instincts caught up to me, as I immediately worried about creatures that were only legends to these children watching television. I thought for sure it had to be vampires, and I wondered if the boys were on high alert, patrolling around the clock, and I wondered if Trisha was safe…_

_***July 4: **__Independence Day…Well, at least in the US…I can't help but wonder about the grand celebration I know is almost surely happening at the Wise house in La Push. What I wouldn't give to see the fireworks, to see Trisha, to see my family…_

_***July 5: **__I phased today…I hadn't been that mad in so long…I walked into the house after a long day at the orphanage, to hear Julietta screaming from upstairs…I ran up the stairs, listening as the baby wailed in its crib and Julietta kept yelling, "¡No, por favor…mi bebé!" He was clearly trying to hurt her, my family. And I…I was so angry…I couldn't stop the shaking, the anger, the hatred…I had to protect them…He had no idea what was coming as I ripped him from the bed and threw him at the wall… I chased the punk outside, intent on ending his miserable life…I only got as far as the woods on the edge of town, before I felt the familiar shivers…It didn't take two minutes before I could hear them…I could hear my "brothers"_

_**"Dude… Ethan, is that you?" **_I recognized Quil's voice, _**"Where are you?"**_

_Nothing…I said nothing, but thoughts were harder to conceal. I thought of the only thing that could make me calm enough to phase back quickly, opening up the hole in my heart I remembered Trisha's beautiful face._

_*__**August 4**_**: **_I know one of them is here…I can smell the scent trying to track me down…Damn me for phasing!_

_*__**August 7:**__I'm going up to the a mountain that overlooks the city for some meditation this evening…Don't know when I'll be back…_

I found my way into the solitude of the wilderness just like I always could. I knew he was there, knew why he was there, and what his intentions were. He was behind me, not saying anything, just standing there.

"Hola, Solace," I said.

"Hey, Ethan," he came to sit next to me, looking me over. "You look good. I guess that means you've been taking care of yourself."

"Uh, thanks, I guess I have," I sighed.

"Ethan, you know why I'm here, right?" Solace asked. He didn't have to ask it. I knew, I knew the moment I phased it wouldn't be long and one of them would be knocking at my doorstep. I nodded to him. "You know I have to take you back, right?"

"I know…doesn't mean I want to go," I said, not necessarily to him, more to myself, trying to figure out what was going on inside my own head.

"If you go back, I can promise no one will hurt you," he said.

Like that was what I was worried about? An act of wolf death match was the last thing on my mind. "I don't care," I mumbled.

"You can't let yourself get like this over a girl, dude," Solace said. Of all the wolves, I knew that he more than anyone would be able to understand why I had left, why I was staying as far from my wolf-life as possible. His own experiences with imprint nonsense, him sleeping with another wolf's imprint pre-imprintation and then backing down from his own wolf death fight.

"It's not just about Trisha. This is my home now. You can't just take me from my home. What'd you want a thank you or something?" I practically spat at him, raising my voice.

"Ethan, this isn't your home. You let yourself get settled here…You've embraced it cuz you think this is all you have. But you know it won't ever be home, you know where your home is. You're lucky—" I interrupted him.

"You want my home! You can fucking have it!" I yelled at him, feeling the urge to get up and punch him, punch him for ruining my wonderfully exotic life.

Solace responded with the same force and anger. "You don't think I would! They don't want me, you little fucking ingrate!"

I shook my head at him. "You know what? You don't understand."

He scoffed. "That's rich! I don't understand?! If there is anyone in this fucking world that understands, it's me! You've been betrayed by your friends, your brothers. You've lost the love of your life and now you're the enemy of the pack. Been there, still dealing with that shit…I have to admit, I owe you," Solace said, as I gave him a questioning look. "Yeah, you're little fit has taken the heat off of me a little. I mean, at least I fucked the imprint _before _the actual imprinting occurred. You were rude and inconsiderate enough to do it after. I'm looking pretty good right now."

"Inconsiderate…" I mouthed to myself.

Solace shook his head a little. "How do you think he feels?"

"Huh…you think I give a fuck how he feels? Cuz I don't."

"Then you're an ass. David's your brother. No matter what he did to you or how he feels about you, he's your brother—you share something sacred. If you could quit thinking with your dick for a second—" I cut him off again.

"Says the world's biggest playboy," I sputtered with venom in my voice.

He shook his head again. "The pack always comes before women. Always."

The irony in that statement… "And you abandoned the pack," I pointed out.

"The pack didn't want me anymore," Solace said.

"But they want me?" I asked.

He laughed. "They probably don't, but at least you have what I didn't—a family that loves you and misses you. Do you realize what you've done to them?"

I shook my head. "Is it bad?" I asked in a small voice.

"Huh! Bad doesn't cut it. Your mom has been a mess since you disappeared. She's miserable, which makes your dad miserable. And what about Taylor, huh? He needs you, he needs a big wolf to look up to and you just left him. Ethan, dude, sometimes life isn't just about your pain. Sometimes you gotta suck it up and be a man." Solace's speech could mimic Washington's Farewell to the Troops. When he was finished, I knew where my place was. But I also knew there was one other thing stopping me.

"Solace, if I go back, he'll kill me," I said.

Solace put his arm around my shoulders. "Nah. Hate you forever? Yes. Kill you? No. And you get used to it after awhile."

I grinned at him.

"So does that mean I can get two tickets to Seattle?" Solace asked.

I took a deep breath, inhaling the wonderful South American oxygen, realizing it was time to say good bye to my adopted home.

"Yeah…I guess so," I gave in.

I was going home to face the music.

And now I find myself sitting on the plane, waiting to return, trying to decide what the first thing I will do is when I get back. Solace says Mom and Dad want to see me, but then it's off to a little meeting with Billy, Sue, Sam, and the other elders. I have a feeling they will be surprised to see how I've grown and matured over the last few months. I'm not the same lovesick puppy I was when I left. One look in my journal will prove that. I have a feeling, though, that my return is only the beginning of things to come.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "The Prodigal Son Returns"

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**Second AN: I wish I could take credit for the Ethan/Solace discussion. Most of the words are Yay's (as I call her). I put them in a more detailed form but the content is mostly her's.**

**AND, this story has maybe two chapters and an epilogue left…BUT, I promise there will be a kick ass sequel to follow…**

**Thanks for your support! You have no idea how wonderful you all are!**


	21. BONUS CHAPTER: Purple Panties

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids, except Jesse. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she is the epitome of coolness!**

**Woo-hoo! Today was the last day of school so here is my present to you, a bonus chapter…Emily's take on the discovery of certain item in David's bed…**

**Big shout out and Thanks to my very awesome friends yay4shanghai (the best beta in, well, this solar system—which I still contend includes Pluto) and KupKakes09, both of which keep me on task and give me the very best ideas! Don't forget to show them some love! **

**Also, check out these other authors: She's A Boozer, Call Me Embrys, Zuzak, Augustblack, and NataliaNicolette. **

****************************************************************************

1BONUS CHAPTER: "Purple Panties"

EMILY'S POV

Laundry day is never my favorite, which is probably why I only try to do laundry one day a week. Plus, having two teenage boys, a baby girl (who manages to spit up on every article of clothing she and I own), and a husband that is constantly covered in some foreign substance, laundry day is always interesting. This particular laundry day is beyond interesting.

After the most horrifying night of my life coming in the form of listening to my son and his imprint have wild, crazy, break-the-bed sex, I learned a lot about my family, things no, I mean, no mother should ever know. For example, I learned that my son is not only well-endowed but that his imprint, a girl I've seen as like a daughter to me, could scream that fact out louder than an 80's hair band. I also learned that my son, like his father, can't get enough of it once he's had a taste of the bed sheet dancing. And lastly, I learned that my other son, poor Mark, sacrifices way too much for his big brother. That I learned as I heard his bed collapse under the moaning and grunting of his twin brother.

So, after Sam and I spent all morning in Port Angeles buying a new bed for Mark (expenses of which came out of David's pocket, though he didn't know that yet), I was less than thrilled about having to spend the rest of my afternoon doing laundry. After I put my sweet little baby girl down for a nap, I decided the best place to start was the boys' room. After all, we needed to clean out the mess of shattered wood in the bedroom. Sam called a few of the wolves over to help, mainly because it was tedious and ended up involving way too many splinters, something that would heal quickly on them, not so much on me. This should have been David's task, cleaning up his spilled milk, so to speak, but I hadn't seen hide nor hair of him or Trisha since the Wise barbeque, and quite honestly I wasn't sure I'd be able to look them in the eyes. Instead, I listened as Sam ordered the boys to throw the wood out the window, stack it up, and hopefully use it for kindling in the winter, though I shuddered to think about seeing that wood everyday until then, knowing how it ended up there to begin with.

"Exactly how did this bed end up like this?" Embry asked.

"You don't wanna know and I don't wanna talk about it," Sam answered him, the embarrassment clearly present in his voice.

"All I know is that this room wreaks of sex! Like, it makes me horny just smelling it," Seth muttered.

Taylor and Embry chuckled, clearly figuring out that it must have been something really good and probably anxious for Mark or David to phase so they could get the scoop.

When the wood was removed and stacked, it was my turn to gather the sheets and strip David's bed, so my sons would sleep snuggly tonight. Mark's sheets were unsalvageable, ripped to shreds during a night of passion (a thought that made me gag almost as much as listening to my son have an orgasm). I had Sam take them outside and burn them. Why did I have him burn them? Because I didn't want the reminder of last night lingering around my home or trashcans any longer than possible.

Before I could make my way to David's bed, I had to wade through a sea of flannel and denim, clothes that David clearly had removed and not felt the need to do anything with besides throwing them on the floor for me to clean up later. (Another amazing fact about my sons…Mark's side of the room was always immaculate, clean and organized. His brother, David, on the other hand, wouldn't know what color the carpet around his bed was if I didn't pick up his laundry for him. I have to say I pitied Trisha in the future, knowing that in all likelihood she would one day be the one that had to clean up David's messes.) I was on a mission now to rid David's bed of the sheets. I removed the quilt and the flat sheet, putting them in the middle of the fitted sheet, which I would use like a hobo bag thrown over my shoulder to carry down the stairs.

Throughout my many laundry days, I have made numerous discoveries. Things ranging from scraps of uneaten food, to pornographic magazines, to, most recently, books on Eastern philosophy and meditation. Once I even found a frog in Mark's bed, put there as a joke by David and Ethan with the intention of scaring the poor child, but the real person that freaked out was me. Today's discovery I think topped most of that.

As customary when stripping a bed, I picked up the pillow to remove the pillowcase. Something caught my eye, something purple and lacy. I dropped the pillow to grab it. The piece of delicate fabric had been folded neatly and placed very carefully in the space between the mattress and the headboard. It almost sat like a sacred relic, to be honored and adored. I unfolded it and held it up. Purple panties…delicate, soft, very intimate purple panties.

"Em, are those for me?" I turned to see my husband leaning in the doorway wiggling his eyebrows. "Wanna put 'em on and see what damage we can do to the other bed?"

"Actually, you insatiable dog, these aren't mine. I found them hidden in your son's bed. Unless he's decided to experiment with wearing women's underwear, I think these belong to a certain young lady we know," I said, holding them up and turning so he could get a good view.

He cringed and threw his hands over his face. "Dear. God. Please tell me those don't belong to that sweet little girl we used to babysit, that also happens to be the daughter of the angriest wolf I've ever known?"

"Sorry, babe, but I think they do," I sighed. "Why would he have them, though? And why would they be folded so neatly and delicately?"

"Ooh, nice undies, Em!" Another voice said from the doorway.

"These are not mine, Seth Clearwater! And if you don't watch it, you won't see your imprint for a week! You pervert!" I kinda yelled at him.

He mimicked Sam's earlier cringe, only his was at the thought of not seeing his sweet imprint for a week, not at the thought of looking at Trisha Wise's very skimpy drawers.

"So, if they aren't your's do I dare ask who they belong to?" Seth asked.

I gave him the "mommy eye," the "are-you-really-asking-me-that" look. "I found them in David's bed. Who do you think they belong to?" I said.

Seth sat for a second before bursting out in laughter. "Those are little Trisha's? Trisha Wise? Paul, the big scary wolf's, daughter?" I nodded.

"Why would he keep them, though? That's just weird," I sighed.

Seth answered me through his laughter. "Why do you think? He's a boy. It's like a trophy of his conquest, a reminder of her nether region, something that's touched the part of her body he dreams about…That's probably why it's near his pillow!"

"Well, you can rest assured, Jesse will own no underwear that skimpy and that I will rip your throat out if I or anyone find them in your bed," Sam said, seriously.

Seth was still laughing. "I think we have awhile before we have to worry about that," he mumbled through his laughter.

"And, to make matters worse, we heard them having sex last night," Sam added. Seth's laughs grew louder.

"You're kidding me, right?" he asked, "David. And Trisha. Having sex." Then he stopped laughing, and it looked like a lightbulb went off above his head. "The bed. That's what happened to the bed! Holy shit! They broke the bed!" Seth couldn't control himself now. I actually thought he might pass out, he was laughing so hard.

I was still standing there, panties in my hand, when my son walked through the doorway.

"What the fuck, Momma! Why do you have Trisha's panties?" David asked.

"Why do _you_ have Trisha's panties?" I shot back.

David's eyes got big. "Uh…I…uh…"

"Son, I think it's time we have another talk," Sam said, slapping David on the back.

"Again?" David said.

I looked at them both confused. "What does he mean 'again,' Sam?"

Sam's eyes got big. "Uh…I…uh…"

Seth was still laughing, now laying on the floor, and I have to admit, were this not happening to my child, I would probably be laughing too, but as it was, I was trying not to strangle my son, my husband, and my second cousin with a pair of flimsy purple underwear!

"Have you had to talk to him about this behavior before, Sam?" I asked, while Sam refused to look anywhere but the floor.

David answered me. "Well, a couple weeks ago, he kinda caught me and Trisha going at in the breakroom at the garage."

Now my eyes were big. "What do you mean 'going at it?'"

"We weren't fucking if that's what you're asking," David spat at me.

Oh, hell, no! My son did not just say that!

"Hell-to-the-no, David Samuel Uley! You will not speak to me like that and you will not refer to sex as fucking, do you hear me?" It was odd for me to say the word "fuck." I generally refrained from saying cuss words. But desperate times call for desperate measures.

Seth was now bright red, rolling around on the floor.

"You're just jealous cuz I'm getting more action than you are!" David shouted at him.

Sam was getting angry and I could see it was time we laid the law down with David.

"Kitchen table, now!" I ordered, as I marched towards the kitchen, panties still in hand.

Sam followed me, David followed Sam, and for some reason, Seth followed David.

"Sit!" I ordered, again, pointing my finger and watching all three males fall in a chair quicker than I had expected.

I paced the floor, figuring out in my head, what I was going to say, exactly. How do you tell your teenage son you listened to him have sex and that it's not an occurrence you want a repeat of? It sounds just so wrong to even think.

I was relieved when Sam finally took the lead. "Where'd you and Trisha go last night when you left the barbeque?"

I waited, knowing he would lie. Only an idiot would tell the truth, but I had a feeling David knew this was coming.

"We came back here," David said with a smirk on his face.

"And?" Seth asked. I was praying he wasn't asking for details.

David took a deep breath. "We just did stuff, you know, looked at books, listened to music. That kinda thing."

I love my son, but I knew he was lying. There's no way in hell David Uley brought a girl to our house to look at a book. I almost wanted to ask him the title of the book just to prove him wrong, but I do love him and I didn't want to damage his psyche too much.

"You're lying. We heard you," Sam said it just like as if he were ordering food at McDonalds.

David looked a little confused and disgusted. "You heard what?"

"We heard you and Trisha fucking like no one's business and we even heard the bed break!" Sam was being patient but he could only take so much before he blew a gasket. I placed my hand on his shoulder.

"I think what your father is saying is that sex is not something to be taken lightly, David," I added that for good measure.

"I know that. I love Trisha and she's my imprint. It's an instinct to want to be with her like that, right?" David was trying to present his case, but it wasn't working.

"Yes, dear, but…it's not that simple…Trisha's still got a lot going on, sweetie. She's still mending, and jumping into bed with you isn't the solution to your want to be near her or the solution to what she's dealing with," I said.

"What'd ya mean, Momma?" David asked.

My poor child...I knew in his mind, most of the time, everything with Trisha and Ethan was resolved. She was his and that was all that mattered. In reality, I could see that Trisha was still carrying around the burden of loving two men, well, boys. I was almost positive though, that if by some miracle Ethan imprinted, then all of this mess would be done and over with. I could see that Trisha desperately wanted to love only David. She did love him, I had no doubt about that. But I could see the conflict in her eyes, though I didn't hear it in her voice last night as she was practically begging my son to make love to her. And my sweet boy, not being able to tell Trisha Wise "no" for all the money in the world, complied, though I'm equally sure that he wanted it probably more than she did, anyway. I couldn't crush David by telling him that his imprint was equally in love with someone else. David was happier than I had seen him in ages, and his relationship with Mark had improved, especially during the months when they both pined over unrequited loves.

I had to decid whether to be honest with him and spill out everything I worried about with Trisha, or just let him bask in his happiness. I chose to let him be happy. It might come back to bite me in the butt later, but for now, I would see him ecstatic and in love.

"Nothing, sweetheart, nothing," I sighed, as Sam gave me a grin.

I watched David smile and saw his eyes move from me to the purple piece of fabric on the table. "Momma, can I have these back?" He asked, slightly licking his lips and making me want to vomit.

"Does Trisha know you have these?" I asked, not knowing if I hoped she did or didn't.

David smiled wider, "Yeah. She said I could have them."

_Dear God_, I thought to myself, _what has Trisha gotten herself into?_

I shook my head and turned to go to the kitchen. Sam followed me, wrapping his arms around my waist as I stood at the sink. "That boy," he sighed into my ear, resting his chin on my shoulder.

"What are we going to do with him?" I asked, being a little sarcastic but trying to figure out how all this was going to work itself out, and also hoping my husband might be able to find a solution.

"So, how was it, man?" I heard Seth ask David.

"I don't kiss and tell," David said. I had to admit I was proud of my son for doing the honorable thing. But, alas, I spoke too soon. "I will tell you that being inside Trisha and coming is much better than jerking off to her in my head."

"You better hope Paul never phases again, dude, because you will be totally dead," Seth chuckled. _Great, a dead son. That's all I need_, I thought to myself.

"Sam, is it too late to lock Jesse up until she's say, I don't know, 35?" I was serious. If this was what I had to look forward to with a daughter, I wanted no part of it.

"I think Seth would probably find a way in, sweetheart," Sam said, crashing my hopes.

"Oh, well, better him than most of the other wolves," I said, twirling around in his arms to kiss him softly on the lips. Each kiss with Sam was the same but different. I always felt the same electricity but it always surprised me. It was always more intense than I remembered. What I had with Sam, that's what I wished for my David, a chance to experience that real love. And the hard part of it was knowing that Trisha could be it, she could do it, but she wouldn't let go of Ethan. I guess, in a way, I wasn't wishing for David to find love, he had found it. I was wishing for Trisha to let go…

My daydream and deep thoughts were interrupted by Jesse's cries, waking from her afternoon nap.

"I'll get her," Sam said, releasing his grip from me.

"No, I'll get her. She likes me better anyway," Seth said, causing Sam to growl under his breath. It was actually kind of true, whenever Seth was around, Jesse didn't want anyone else to hold her or play with her. It took everything just for me to be able to breastfeed her without Seth having to be in the room. We even had to have a special blanket in Jesse's crib that had Seth's scent on it to help her sleep. She loved Seth. Not in the way that I knew she would one day, but she loved him. It was almost like she had imprinted on him.

I took my seat next to David, as he smiled up at me. "You're going to be the death of me, you realize that, don't you?" I asked him.

"Ah, Momma, I love her. You know that. I kept the panties because they have her scent on them and I sleep better with her around me," David said. It made sense, for the same reason Jesse had her Seth Blankie, as we called it.

"Just be good, David. No more sex like that and not in our house, please," I never thought I'd live to see the day I would have to tell my teenage son not to have sex in my house.

Sam walked up beside me. "Hun, you won't have to worry about that. Embry's gonna give him an order…no more sex." I couldn't help but watch David cringe at the thought, though I wasn't sure if it was knowing there would be an Alpha command coming or that he wasn't going to be having sex for awhile.

I wanted the conversation to end there, go about my merry day and not have to deal with any thinking about my son having sex, ever again. But my damn husband, had to ask the question.

"Son, is there anything you want to ask us about? I mean, you seemed to know what you were doing…" He trailed off and I felt my lunch lurch at the thought.

I saw David scrunch his face up, never a good sign. The "David face scrunch" usually indicated that he was deep in thought and was probably actually thinking about asking questions. Then he opened his mouth…

"Is it normal for a girl to want _it_ that bad? Like Trisha _really, really_ wanted it?" David asked.

_Damn my husband!_ I thought to myself, as Sam looked at me.

"You wanna take this or should I?" Sam asked.

"You asked, you answer," I said, having no intention of answering any question about the female desire to mate.

"Well, women's wants and needs are quite different from our's," I could tell Sam was stumbling to find the words to explain this, but I was laughing to myself, thinking about the regret I was almost sure Sam was feeling now.

David interrupted him. "Could it be because she's in heat?"

_Did he just say she was in heat?_ I thought to myself.

"Did you just say she was in heat?" Sam asked.

David looked down at the table. "I think…"

Then he looked up at me with confused eyes. "Momma, how do you know if a girl's pregnant?"

It was at that point, that I passed out…


	22. The Prodigal Son Returns

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids, except Jesse. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she rocks and doesn't mind sharing!**

**Sorry it took awhile to update! I spent all day Wednesday in a car, driving 14 hours to Alabama…with my fam…but I promise that this won't disappoint.**

**Big shout out and Thanks to my very awesome friends yay4shanghai (the best beta in, well, this solar system—which I still contend includes Pluto) and KupKakes09, both of which keep me on task and give me the very best ideas! Don't forget to show them some love! **

**Also, check out these other authors: She's A Boozer, Call Me Embrys, Zuzak, Augustblack, and NataliaNicolette. **

****************************************************************************

Chapter 18: "The Prodigal Son Returns"

TRISHA'S POV

"Did I do something wrong?" I asked him. For almost two weeks, since the day after our bed-breaking sex romp, David would barely touch me. He would kiss me and hold me, but anytime my hands drifted below his belt, he pushed them away with a look of pain on his face.

"Huh?" David asked, looking confused. We were sitting on the Uley's couch, I had been curled into his side but with his last rejection, I moved to the opposite end, feeling isolated and alone.

"Is it because you don't want me now…because you think I'm p-pregnant?" I always stuttered on that last word. We still had one week to wait before we could take a test. I was hoping, though, that my period would start next week, and ease all our concerns.

David must have seen the worry in my eyes. He pulled me close to him, letting me nuzzle my head into his neck. "What are you talking about, Dollface?"

I pulled away slightly to look at him, feeling tears well up in my eyes. "Why won't you sleep with me?" I asked.

David chuckled. "I slept with you last night, weirdo." Yeah, we slept in the same bed, but that's not what I meant and he knew it.

"That's not what I'm talking about and you know it!" I was getting frustrated with him. When I wanted to have sex, he just wanted to watch TV. I was beyond pissed and for days, a part of me started to feel as if every bad thing around me was my fault. I just needed him to comfort me, to make me feel better, but the closest thing I could get from him was a hug. Granted, hugs aren't bad, especially David hugs, which always make my whole body tingle, enveloped in his warmth.

I'd had enough of his lousy excuses. Did he not know that I was worried too? I was the one that was going to have to face everyone, to shame my parents and serve as an incubator for a little wolf. "I'm going home," I said, getting off the couch.

"You just got here!" David said, calling after me. It was too late though. I was on the porch, head down, walking straight into a wall of muscle.

"Where you off to, Trisha-bug?" the wall said. I looked into Seth's eyes.

"Home," I snapped at him, trying to get around him and keep him from seeing the tears.

"What happened?" he asked as he grabbed me by the shoulders.

"Nothing, just let me go!" I screamed at him.

"Let her go, Seth," David said from behind me. I turned to face him, twisting my ankle at a funny angle.

"Shit!" I screamed, feeling myself start to fall. David swiftly moved to catch me and cradled me in his arms.

"Trisha, stop before you hurt yourself," he said, kissing me on the forehead.

I was almost sobbing now, as I looked up at him. I could see the same love and admiration that was always there. So why wouldn't he touch me? He pulled me up into a hug and I immediately pushed my head into his chest, crying large tears. I didn't want to say anything, I wanted him to feel my confusion and desperation.

"Why don't you love me anymore? I thought I was your imprint," I said it very softly, not expecting David to hear, but the damn wolf hearing…

"Why would you think I don't love you?" He whispered to me. He leaned down to rest his chin on my head.

"You won't touch me. I try to…" he stopped me.

"There's something I need to tell you," David said. "Ethan phased a couple of weeks ago. We think we know where he is."

David and I hadn't talked about Ethan since the day in the truck on the way to the beach. It was an issue that scared the shit out of both of us. And for the exact same reason. David feared that if Ethan came back I wouldn't and couldn't stay away from him. I feared the same thing. Did I love David? Yes, very much. But the problem lie in that fact that I still also loved Ethan very much. He was my first love and just because he had been gone for six months, didn't mean that those feelings weren't still there, alive and well.

"What's going to happen?" I asked before turning to see the sadness in David's eyes.

"I think you need to go home and talk to your Momma," he said. "I'll take you."

He carried me to the truck, not making eye contact again for the rest of our time together, dropping me off at my house without so much as a goodbye. As excited as I was at the prospect of Ethan returning, of seeing him again, I didn't like the idea of hurting David. I couldn't hurt him. I didn't want to. I should have stopped thinking about Ethan months ago. I still dreamed about it though and a hidden naughty part of my brain still wished for his return. I knew this was deeper than me. This was my heart, this was love, an emotion where all rules are thrown out and all reason gone.

"Mom!" I yelled, running into the house. She didn't answer right away. "Mother!" Still nothing. "Rachel Wise!"

"For the love of Jacob Black, what is going on?" Mom said, coming from the kitchen, hands on her hips and flour on her face.

"Did you know Ethan phased?" I looked at her coldly. "Did Dad know?"

I saw that she was trying desperately to find the words to explain to me what had happened, why I hadn't been told sooner. She must not have been able to muster them and all I got was a nod of the head.

I was livid…beyond livid, actually. Why had no one said anything to me? Why wouldn't they tell me he was okay, at least? Did they all know I still loved him? Did they know that deep down I was just a flaky bitch who didn't care who she hurts as long as she got what she wanted in the end? Could the whole fucking wolf-pack see through the semi-façade I had created with David? They must have. They all must know that no matter how much I loved David, no matter how many times we made love, until Ethan completely let _me_ go, I would never be able to choose between them.

I would want them both with all of my heart. It was wrong, so wrong of me but a part of me, even when I was at my happiest with David, still thought about Ethan. Every day even. My thoughts would stray to him even when I tried not to. Now, knowing that he would return to La Push, even though I spent months begging for his homecoming , I couldn't imagine what I would do if I saw him again. I liked to think that if I saw him, I would have the maturity to be okay, but I didn't know if I had the strength for that.

No, Ethan had to let me go. Something that might only happen with an imprint, but then maybe it already had. Maybe he had spent his months away growing and maturing and getting over me. That would be perfect, the ideal situation, but the selfish bitch in me hurt at the very thought of Ethan not loving me the way I love him. Sometimes I prayed that Ethan would imprint while he was away, because, again, I'm a selfish bitch and as long as I can have Ethan, as long as he still feels the same, I will want him.

My mother stood motionless, as the back door opened, and Dad and Jared walked in the kitchen. Their conversation ceased as soon as they saw the anger in my eyes and the look on my Mother's face.

"He's coming back, isn't he?" I asked.

Jared spoke up. "Yeah. Your Mom asked Solace to go find him. He'll bring him back as soon as he does."

I didn't know whether I should hug my Mom and thank her, or if I should curse her. "Why would you do that?" I asked her, whispering. "Why would you do that to me?"

"It's not always about you, Trisha," Kim said, walking in the room and standing next to my Mom. "Is it really fair that you get to stay here and have your happily-ever-after with David, while my son pays for both your sins, off in some South American jungle?"

Kim was my second mother. She had never spoken to me with such aggression. But then I guess that's what happens when someone forces your child to leave you. That's how you treat someone who is the root of all problems and evils going on.

"You told me to let him go!" I tried to throw her words back at her. "I didn't want to, Kim. I loved him! I wanted to be with him but you told me I was going to give in anyway, and it was best to let him go before I hurt him! Maybe I wouldn't have given in if I could have had him, if everyone in my life didn't push me at David. But I let him go because it was good for Ethan, that's what you said Kim!"

"I didn't tell you to send him running off to the middle of fucking nowhere," Kim raised her voice. Neither of my parents did anything about it, both standing still as statues. Kim paced from my mother's side to Jared and back again a few time before taking a deep breath and continuing.

"I know how it is, Trisha. Out-of-sight, out-of-mind, right? You don't see Ethan, you don't have to choose. I know how hard this is, trust me. But I just want my son back. I want him home, sweetheart." Her voice had calmed but her words still stung. She was right. I had allowed myself to push Ethan to the far corner of my mind so I didn't have to choose. But then I hadn't had a choice, I wasn't allowed to be with Ethan. If I had had a choice, knowing what I knew now, what would I do? I still wouldn't choose, because I couldn't.

The anger boiled through me. Who was I angry at? Kim? My mom? Ethan? David… the only person I could be angry with was myself and the thought was too much for me to handle. I could feel my stomach start to lurch, and I did the stupidest thing I could ever have thought of.

"Yeah, well, it doesn't matter now anyway. David and I had sex two weeks ago and I was apparently 'in heat' so I'm probably pregnant! Congratulations!" I grabbed my keys from the table next to the door and ran out to my car, not listening as my Dad yelled for me to come back. I didn't cry, I wasn't going to, not now.

I pushed the key in the ignition, turned it quickly and revved the engine, peeling out of the driveway, headed who knows where. I didn't notice the wolf running beside me, as I made my decision to head to the cliffs. I made the 5 minute drive in under a minute, throwing the car in park and marching off to the edge.

"Trisha?" A voice said from behind me. "Baby girl, please talk to me."

"Just go away, Dad, please." I didn't want to do or be anything at that moment. I didn't want to listen to another speech, have another person hate me or worse, worry about me. I heard a car pull up and a door shut.

"Trisha Sarah Wise, you look at me this instance," my Mom's voice was harsh and cold and I saw her throw a pair of shorts to my Dad.

"What do you want?" I spat at her as I turned around.

"Do you really think you're pregnant?" She asked me. This was Rachel Wise at her most impatient, waiting for my answer and tapping her foot on the soft soil.

"I don't know!" I yelled at her.

"Did you and David have sex?" Mom asked me walking closer to me and grabbing onto my shoulders.

"What if we did? What if I told you he fucked me so hard that we broke his bed? I fucked Ethan, too! Did you know that?! That's right, you raised a whore!" I screamed at her, getting closer to her face. Mom pulled her hand off my shoulder, reared it back, and slapped me hard on my cheek. It stung, but the hand imprint on my cheek was superficial in comparison to the pain I felt in my heart. Neither of my parents had ever hit or slapped me. As angry as my Dad was, he never brought himself to resort to violence on my behalf. What was worse was that I knew I deserved it. I knew I was being disrespectful and rude, but I didn't care.

I let out a breath and ran, all the way to Grandpa Billy's house. He was waiting for me on the porch, sitting in his wheelchair and tapping his fingers on the armrest.

"Your mother called. Everything okay?" He asked me. I was pissed that she knew where I was going, that she knew me better than I knew myself sometimes.

"Nope. And I don't want to talk about it," I said to him, looking down at him from my standing position. I started to walk off.

"Do you know what the punishment is for sleeping with another wolf's imprint?" he asked me.

I shook my head at him, stopping in my tracks. "When Ethan comes back, David has every right to challenge him to a fight and he probably will."

"So what? The wolves fight all the time," I scoffed at him.

"When a brother wolf has sex with another wolf's imprint, the fight is to the death, Trisha," Billy said, with more seriousness in his voice than I had ever heard. "David can kill Ethan. No questions asked. Don't you think it's taking a lot for those boys to face up to this?"

I didn't want to think about it. Mostly, I think, I didn't want to admit that anyone was right, especially my Grandfather, with whom I now knew, knew that I had had sex. "Grandpa Billy, can I please just go to bed?" I asked him, hanging my head.

I heard him sigh. I obviously hadn't given him the answer he expected. Oh, well, I could add it to the list of disappointments I had managed to exhibit today.

"Sleep in Uncle Jake's room," he said, and I nodded entering the house and heading up the stairs.

I kicked my shoes off and climbed under the covers, burying my head in Uncle Jake's pillow, a pillow that still held his scent, even though it had been months, maybe years since he had used it. I breathed the smell in and felt the drama of the day quell up in my throat as I finally let the tears break free from eyes, not even noticing when I drifted off.

I woke up the next morning feeling dampness between my legs and cramps coming from my abdomen. I ran to the bathroom and my suspicion was correct. I had never been so happy to see the color red in my life. I picked up my cell phone and dialed David's number.

"Yo," He said.

I tried to think about how to say this, though, in my mind I was sure it wouldn't matter. I just need to get it out there.

"Yeah, just wanted to tell you, you didn't knock me up, so…" I didn't know what else to say. That was the bulk of it right there in one sentence.

"What'd ya say? I just woke up, and you're kinda yelling at me," David said. I could hear the sleep in his voice.

"I got my period. I'm not pregnant. Have a nice day," and I hung up the phone.

Next on the list were Mom and Dad. It rang three times before the answering machine picked up. We had the most absurd answering machine message, a combination of Mom and Dad's voices.

_You've reached the Wise house. Leave a message if you want or don't._—Dad

_Paul, you can't say that. We actually want people to leave a message._—Mom

_What if I don't want them to? What if I don't want to talk to them? Huh?_—Dad

_Paul! Now look the times almost up to record the thingy_.—Mom

_Goddamn, Son of a Bitch_—Dad

BEEP…After they recorded the ridiculous banter, neither one could figure out how to erase it and record a legitimate salutation.

"Hey, it's me. I'm not pregnant. I'll call later," and I hung up. I walked downstairs, still in my clothes from yesterday.

"Your mother brought this over for you. Said you might want clothes to change into," Grandpa Billy said.

Mom had packed a huge duffle bag with enough clothes for a month. And on top were a box of tampons. _Damn her!_ She knew I wasn't pregnant because like I said before, she knows me better than I know myself.

"The Elders are coming over to discuss some stuff. You're welcome to stick around, if you want," he said.

"Did you eat breakfast?" I asked him. He didn't answer, which in Billy Black language means no. I sliced up a few apples, scooped out some peanut butter and we ate our breakfast. It wasn't much, but it would hold us over.

"I want you to stay here for a while, Trisha, until things get sorted out," Grandpa Billy said. "Plus, I'll need your help with the Elders meetings. It's important for me to have you here."

I couldn't deny Grandpa Billy anything, especially my help. "Of course."

I saw him take a deep breath. "Solace has gone to get Ethan. They should be back next week. I need you to talk to David and find out what's going on in his head."

I nodded to him. "David wouldn't hurt Ethan. It would kill him to inflict any kind of pain on him."

Grandpa shook his head. "All bets are off with imprints, sweetie. Sam says he won't try anything, and that he'll step in if that's the case, but I need you to find out exactly what's going on. David'll talk to you like he won't talk to anyone else.

"I won't spy on him, Gramps," I sputtered out.

"I don't expect you to. You should care enough about the Wahallas to want to know the answer for yourself," he sighed. "I need you to answer me this question… I need to know if you genuinely love David?"

I thought for a millisecond. "Yes. Very much," I felt my tears start.

"Do you love Ethan still?"

"Yes. Very much," I sighed out.

He rubbed his neck. "I guess we just have to wait." I turned to walk away. "I need you to do me a favor though, Trisha."

I turned back around. "Anything, Gramps." I smiled at him.

"Come sit down. This is kinda serious and I'll do better if I can look you in the eyes."

I complied, walking over to the couch and sitting down, as he wheeled over to me. He held my hands in my lap.

"Trisha, I know what David's going to say. He's gonna say he's fine with Ethan coming back. Maybe even happy about it, but be on the lookout, make sure it's not just an act. I don't want anyone to get hurt, okay?"

"How will I know that?" I asked, my heart crushing at the thought of one of my loves killing the other.

"You'll know," he said. "I know the pack is strong, Trisha. But they can't survive another catastrophe. Remember what happened with Embry and Solace? If David and Ethan actually fought, this would be about a hundred times worse."

The Embry-Leticia-Solace love triangle had been a dark time for the pack, it split it literally in two. I shuddered to think I could possibly contribute to that kind of fiasco. I agreed to help in whatever I could. I wouldn't be the downfall of the pack.

I stayed a recluse in Billy's house for a week, not seeing or talking to anyone. Then one afternoon there was a knock on the door, and against my better judgment, I answered it. My stomach knotting as I pulled the door back slowly.

"David," I said. Immediately I noticed the pain on his face, he looked like a lost little kid at the mall walking around screaming for their parents.

"Can we talk?" He asked me. "I just wanna talk. I just need to hear your voice."

I couldn't look at him. His agony was so obvious and the only thing he was requesting was to hear the sound of my voice. I was hurting him… again.

"I'm sorry, Dollface. I should've told you as soon as I found out. But we had so much going on, with worrying about you being pregnant, and…" He trailed off.

I lifted his chin to look at me. "I understand why you didn't tell me. For the same reason we haven't talked about him in months."

He smiled at me. "I just love you so much, and I'm scared, Trisha."

David Uley, the boy whom I had never seen fear anything, was afraid of Ethan's return. Did he know too? Did he know I was never completely his? Would that knowledge be enough for him to kill over?

"David, think about Kim and Jared. They're like family to us, right? They miss their son. It's not fair to them to have to be without him," I said, still looking in his eyes.

"I guess," he sighed. "So, we should probably talk about this whole you not being pregnant thing."

I laughed. "What's there really to talk about? We had a little scare but it turned out to be nothing."

David's face became very serious and he cupped my cheek in his hand. "I want you to know, Dollface, there is no one in the world I want to have puppies with but you. I don't care if it's tomorrow, next week, or five years from now. I want to have my family with you."

I closed my eyes and leaned into his hand. It felt nice. It felt right, so warm and gentle. Please, please let me be strong. Let David be strong.

"I have to ask you something," he kept his hand on my cheek as I spoke to him. "I know what happens when one wolf has sex with another's imprint. I have to ask if you're going to go through with the fight-to-the-death thing."

He shook his head. "He was my best friend, Trisha. I couldn't hurt him. As long as I have you, I won't try nothin'. But if I see him so much as look at you in a way he would look at anyone other than his sister, so help me, I won't be able to control myself, Dollface."

There was my answer. I had to be strong enough to resist the feelings I have Ethan, for his own good. But then I knew that was easier said than done. I knew that was going to be beyond difficult. Seeing him at bonfires and family barbeques. Prancing around with David as if nothing had happened.

We sat together for awhile, him holding me on Grandpa Billy's front porch. Watching as it started to drizzle lightly. Then the wolf's howl filled the air and we knew he was here. Ethan was back.

ETHAN'S POV

"Ah, the prodigal son returns!" Mark said, greeting Solace and I at the baggage claim at the SeaTac Airport. He looked older, much more serious than he had been. He was accompanied by my not-so-little brother, Taylor, who held onto him bouncing like an impatient child.

"Good to see you, man," I said, hugging Mark and turning to Taylor. Taylor looked as if he might come out of his skin any minute with excitement. He smiled at me and as soon as I was close enough he practically tackled me with a hug.

"I missed you, too, little bro." I sighed, giving into the hug. It felt nice.

The drive to La Push was quick and every sight and smell reminded me just how much I missed it. I sat in the front, Solace taking the wheel allowing Taylor and Mark to sit behind us. I watched them in the rearview mirror, they were sitting close silently looking at each other occasionally nodding and mouthing things. They were having a silent conversation I obviously was not supposed to be a part of.

I turned away looking out the window as we drew closer. Everything looked and felt so much like home. Pulling into the driveway, I could already see Mom and Dad waiting on the lawn, Amber twirling around, and trying to get little Annabelle to join in.

"How long do I have before the meeting with the Elders?" I asked Taylor.

"Embry's said he wanted to give you a chance to see the fam before the 'great council.'" Taylor said, adding a bit of dramatization on the end. "So, I'm guessing about fifteen minutes."

"Thanks," I scoffed and started getting out of the car. Mom and Dad ran to meet us, both with tears in their eyes.

"Holy shit, Ethan! Don't you **ever** do that to me again, do you hear me?" Mom said, pulling me into a hug with more strength than a newborn vamp.

I couldn't help but chuckle at her enthusiasm. "Geez, Mom, are you trying to break me in half?"

She laughed and loosened her grip on me, looking into my face with anxious eyes. "I want to hear all about your little vacation when you get back from your 'meeting' with the Elders."

"Sure thing, Mom," I said, noticing Dad hovering not too far away.

"Dad," I said, nodding to him, still holding on to Mom. He moved to me and gave me a crushing hug, enveloping me and Mom in his large warm arms.

"I missed you, son," Dad said with tears in his eyes. "I'm so sorry, I…"

I stopped him, putting my hand up. "Doesn't matter now, Dad. All that matters is that I'm home."

I looked to see Embry come out of the house. "Guess I should get this over with sooner rather than later," I said to him.

"I'm coming with you, son," Dad said, patting me on the back. "You'll need someone else in your corner."

"I'll be there, too, though I wouldn't count on the Elders giving my opinion much weight," Solace said coming into the circle. He had been standing in the background trying not to interrupt my family reunion.

Mom walked towards Solace and hugged him. "Thank you for bringing him home," I heard her say, burying her head in Solace's chest.

"No prob. Besides, you should really thank, Rach. She's the one that practically threw herself at me. I told her there was no need for sexual favors but you know how Rachel is. How could you blame her though, being married to Paul and all," Solace said, his words dripping in sarcasm. I laughed, Embry didn't. The tension between them was still palpable. I wondered if it would be like that with me and David, if we would never be able to look at each other the same way again.

"So, where's this going down at?" I asked, wondering where the council would be meeting, hoping it was on some sort of neutral ground. The Uley house was clearly not a good choice, though I didn't doubt that Sam would protect me, even if the wolf he was protecting me from was his own son. Maybe Sue's house?

"Billy Black's," Embry said. It wasn't ideal but who was I to ask for a change of venue? And Billy was usually pretty impartial, except when it involved his precious granddaughter, just the thought of whom made me warm up inside. God, I loved her still, I tried not to. I knew from Solace she was David's Trisha now.

"We should probably go," I sighed.

"Be strong, baby," Mom said, kissing me on the cheek. "Don't take any shit from anyone, you hear me?"

I smiled at her. "Sure thing."

Dad opened the minivan door, which quickly filled with wolves, including Taylor, Mark, Solace, Embry, Dad, and me. It wasn't the most comfortable ride. But then again, any ride where one is going to face their fate is hardly a walk in the park.

Within minutes, we pulled up to the familiar small, wood framed house. Billy Black and Sue sat on the front porch waiting for us. Sam walked out the front door and I shuddered to think what was set to happen. My life was up for debate.

I turned to Solace, trying to look courageous. "Here goes nothing."

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Lace Up Your Shoes"

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**Second AN:** **One chapter left, then the epilogue! I already have the prologue written for the sequel. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!**


	23. Lace Up Your Shoes

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she rocks and doesn't mind sharing!**

**Big shout out and Thanks to my very awesome friends yay4shanghai (for being the most awesome beta imaginable and pushing me to be a better writer) and KupKakes09, both of which keep me on task and give me the very best ideas! Don't forget to show them some love! **

**Also, check out these other authors: She's A Boozer, Call Me Embrys, Zuzak, Augustblack, NataliaNicolette, and twihardcaligurl.**

**I'm assisting augustblack and zuzak with another story called "Sunset." It's a Sam/Bella fic and the first chapter's already up! Be sure to give it a look because it won't disappoint. **

**One hundred points if you can tell me what song this chapter's title comes from!**

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Chapter 19: "Lace Up Your Shoes"

ETHAN'S POV

I had known Billy Black all of my life and had never really seen him as a scary man. Intimidating, yes. But never really scary. He was man to be respected. That was one of the first lessons all new wolves learned, that although he himself had never been a wolf, the legends of our people ran deeper than just words to him. They ran through his veins, in his blood, in his son and daughters, in Trisha. If our pack worked as a monarchy, the Black family would no doubt be the royal family. And the patriarch, Billy, was the go-to source when any type of problem arose. Between him, Sue, Old Quil, and now Sam, no problem couldn't be solved. But now I was the problem.

Sue pushed Billy out to meet us as we piled out of the van. Sam stood back on the porch, leaning on the railing and looking more domineering than I had ever noticed before.

"Ethan, it's good to have you back. We've all missed you," Billy said, shaking my hand.

"Thank you, sir, but I seriously doubt everyone missed me," I said. I nodded up to the porch and watched David Uley open the screen, taking his place to stand next to his father.

"Well, I wouldn't say that, son," Billy said while giving me a small smile.

Sue hugged me. "Why don't we go ahead and get this started?" She said. Sue was another essential element to the pack. Not only was she the mother of two wolves, she was the only woman to sit on the council of Elders. She took her job very seriously and in every decision she made, she looked to the heavens for guidance, including that of her long-dead husband, Harry.

"Sure, sure," I said, following everyone else into the house with Dad on my right and Solace on my left.

As we gathered in the Black's den, I looked around to see who was in attendance. It was no surprise that most of the pack was there, but also most of the retirees were there, as well. Solace noticed too.

"Uh, Billy, I thought this was a council meeting. Why the hell are all these people here?" Solace asked.

"It's a pretty important issue and the whole pack is having to deal with. Not to mention, that it also involves the children of three now retired wolves," Billy said to Solace before looking around the packed room. "That said, this is not an ambush. If you have something to say to Ethan than you sure as hell better make sure you say it civilly and if even one person gets out of line, so help me, I'll kick you all out of here faster than you can say 'Jacob Black.' Everyone got that?"

There was a soft rumble of "Yeahs" and "Uh-huhs" through the den.

"Good. Now, let's get to the actual cause of this meeting," Billy straightened up and Sue sat down next to him. "I want you to tell us why you think you're here. And try to remember that my granddaughter and Paul's daughter is involved and we don't necessarily need details."

Solace patted my shoulder. "You can do this," he said.

I cleared my throat and felt the room tense as I opened my mouth. "I, uh, I had sex with Trisha."

"And who's imprint is she?" David asked from across the room.

"Billy, can anyone just speak out like that?" Dad asked, looking at a tense David.

Billy looked between us and I swear I heard a little chuckle escape his mouth.

"In this case, I think it would be safest for David and Ethan to say what they need to with a room full of bodyguards," Billy smiled. "Now, Ethan answer David's question and continue."

I grunted a bit, mad that I had to continue just to justify David's idiotic routine to get me to admit outloud what I'd done.

"Yes, I get it, David. She's your imprint. I fucked her and that's against 'the rules,'" I said, making the quote signs with my fingers.

"Don't you dare talk about Trisha that way!" David yelled.

"Like what? I fucked her and that pretty much sums it up," I said.

"Did you have feelings for her at the time?" Embry asked.

I looked down to the wooden floor. "Of course, I did. I love, er loved her."

"We get it, dumbass. You love her, la ti freakin' da! The rules say…" David started but I cut him.

"The rules? The rules are idiotic and archaic," I argued back to him. I looked at David who was scratching his head, probably trying to figure out what I had just said. I almost asked Billy if he had a dictionary handy to help him out a little.

"So now our rules and traditions are stupid?" Seth asked. Seth's loyalty had once been neutral, but knowing that he had imprinted on an Uley, he wouldn't be neutral anymore.

"They are when they take away a person's free will," I said. "Since when did we stop letting our women think for themselves?"

"That's got nothing to do with this!" David growled at me. "You fucked her! You fucked my Trisha when you knew she was mine!"

"Really?! She's just a possession to you? An object to have at your disposal, nothing other than a baby maker to carry on your wolf gene? Someone to make you look smarter than you actually are?" I knew I was hitting a little below the belt, but I was sick of losing, of being the only one forced to ever give up anything in this fucked up love triangle. I knew his belief in the imprint held partly on that fact, the fact that she wasn't just his soulmate but had more to do with that fate had chosen her most likely to get knocked up by David Uley.

"Hell, no! You know that's not what I meant!"

"No, or I wouldn't have brought it up," I replied, trying to remain calm, watching David grow angrier with each rebuttal I provided.

"You broke the laws. You had sex with an imprint. I'll say it again, she was and is mine!" David gritted his teeth.

Why must we feel the need to become that person that we aren't? Why did I feel the need to revert back to the primitive caveman inside me? I don't know for sure. But I didn't think about any of that before I opened my mouth.

"Well, she certainly didn't say that when I was inside her," I blurted out.

I've never seen Paul move as fast as he did then. His face was hard and he was speaking through his teeth. "Do not EVER discuss my daughter in that manner, do you hear me?"

I nodded.

"I want to hear you say it!" Paul was in my face.

"Yes, sir," I said.

Billy looked at Paul, nodding, almost as if he was praising him for standing up for this granddaughter.

"I realize Trisha is not the innocent victim in this. She willing participated in having sex with both of us—"David started but was cut off again, this time by Paul.

"Wait…You had sex with Trisha, too?" he asked.

I couldn't help but smile at the hole David had just dug for himself. David's face was a look of horror. I was shocked myself, knowing that Trisha would sleep with him, but I guess I wasn't one to judge, remembering for a moment my interlude with Marissa.

"It would appear that Trisha won't be wearing anything white on her wedding day," Taylor chuckled next to me. I wanted to laugh, as well, but I was enjoying the "go-to-hell" look Paul was giving David at the moment. I should've elbowed him in the gut for talking about my love like that, too, but again, I knew David was probably about to get the beating of a lifetime from Paul, and I did **not** want to miss that.

"I thought you knew? She said she told you and Rachel she thought she was pregnant," David said.

This kept getting better. Now, not only had the love of my life had sex with my now archenemy, she thought she was pregnant.

"Man, I think Paul's head might actually explode," Taylor whispered. "See how that vein right there keeps popping out?"

"Is she?" I heard Sam ask.

"No, you know that. Or did you forget Mom passing out when I asked how we'd know? And then I told you the day she called and said she got her…her…you know what," David said, raising his eyebrows.

"What was it she got, David?" Now Solace was just messing with him. He knew very well what it was but nothing would be funnier to us and more traumatic to David than to have to talk about Trisha's menstrual cycle.

"You know…she got her thing that comes every month," David said, watching as both Taylor and Solace pretended to have a look of confusion on their faces. "Damnit, she got her period!" David finally yelled out. But the hilarity of the situation quickly faded when we saw the look on Paul's face.

"You knew, Sam?" Paul asked. "Of course you wouldn't say anything, right? It's okay because he's a boy? He looks cool because he's not a virgin anymore and my daughter suddenly becomes the pack bicycle? Everyone gets a turn?" Paul was fuming and I could almost see tears forming in his eyes. His face showed hurt, betrayal and disappointment. Billy flinched at the thought of his granddaughter in this light.

"I'm sick of this," Paul grunted out. "Goddamn, son-of-a- bitch! Trisha, get the fuck down here now!"

How could I not have caught her scent earlier? As soon as she hit the first step on the staircase, my senses were overwhelmed with the familiar apple and cinnamon. She had grown up a little, filled out since I had been gone. She was still as beautiful as I had ever imagined, and I smiled watching her almost flutter down the stairs.

She didn't look at me. Or David. She didn't even look at Billy or Paul. Her beautiful doe eyes stayed glued to the floor.

"You are to stay away from both David and Ethan until we figure out what the hell is going on," Paul said.

My angel opened her mouth. "Yes, Daddy."

Paul looked at everyone in the room with disapproving eyes. "Go on back upstairs now," he said to Trisha. She obeyed, fluttering back up just like she had on her way down.

Sue was the one to finally end this confrontation. "Bottom line is this. Ethan, do you admit to having sex with another wolf's imprint? Just answer yes or no."

"Yes," I said.

"And did you know the consequences of that when you did it?" Sue asked.

"Yes," I answered. If I was going to be facing the wrath of hell, I might as well be honest and hope for a little mercy.

Sue turned to David. "Do you have any intention of following through with your right to challenge him?"

David grunted, blinking hard. "No."

"Then it's settled. No fighting, no more sex with other wolf's imprints, and we'll all get along," I couldn't help but smile at how simple Sue made it sound, knowing it was going to be nothing of the sorts.

"So, I think that concludes our meeting," Billy said.

"One more thing, are you planning on patrolling again?" Embry asked.

I nodded to him. "If that's okay."

"Of course. I just need to work you into the rotation. I'll make sure you and David aren't ever working the same shifts," Embry said. I knew, though he tried to be impartial as the current Alpha, he could only side with David, having been in David's shoes.

"Thank you, Embry," I sighed.

Most everyone was gone as soon as the meeting ended. Trisha was still upstairs and Paul had joined her. I could faintly hear him telling her what had been said and heard her soft sobs as she explained to her father that she was sorry she was such a disappointment and that she wasn't a harlot. I saw David, too, cringing at every tear drop we could hear hit the floor. Paul was trying to sooth her, but it wasn't working. Eventually, I decided I couldn't listen anymore. I made my way out the door, sensing David behind me every step as I stopped in the yard.

"What'd you want, David?" I asked curtly.

"I'm not gonna hurt you, if that's what you're worried about," David said with a smirk. I had to admit I _was_ a little afraid. I was what you could call a lover, not a fighter. Sure, I was a wolf but I didn't really enjoy fighting like the others did. Plus, David was always bigger than me and even as friends I tried not to mess around physically with him too much, because it was just easy for him to lose control.

"Then why the hell are you following me?" I asked him.

I could see David's animal instincts take over, as he started circling like we did when we were about to attack in wolf form. His eyes showed the most emotions I had ever seen from him before, though. He was clearly hurt, scared, confused, worried…all wrapped into his dark eyes.

"David!" Mark yelled from the porch.

I stood perfectly still ready for the impact I knew was coming. He lunged at me, only to be sideswiped by Embry.

"David Samuel Uley!" Sam picked David up, but David was still intent on coming at me. I couldn't help but not laugh at the sight of Mark, Sam, and Embry holding David back, especially after David had just convinced the pack he had no intention of hurting me.

"You stay the fuck away from my Trisha! You fucking hear me! If I so much as see you fucking breathe in her fucking direction, I'll rip your fucking throat out!" David was angry. This was the angriest I'd ever seen him, honestly.

I nodded to him and walked away, hearing him fussing with the men holding him back. So much for my welcome home.

TRISHA'S POV

I watched him walk away, seeing the three giant men holding David back with all they had. I had sat quietly for most of the meeting, just listening and trying desperately to maintain any self-respect I had as they pretty much ruined my already tainted reputation. I almost wondered if I shouldn't just put a sign on the door, have the wolves line up, and I'd just take care of all of them. That's how I felt at the moment, like nothing but a piece of ass.

My poor Dad, forced to sit and listen to boys discuss having sex with me. I hadn't been his sweet, innocent little girl in a long time. But any of his trust I had, I lost that day. I felt…worthless.

Ethan…my first love, my love. Seeing him, smelling him brought it all back so painfully, I loved him still so much. He did and would always hold a piece of my heart.

And then, seeing David so angry. I knew there was no way he would keep up his vow to not kill Ethan. He proved that that wasn't a possibility. Hell, it took three wolves to keep him at bay and I doubt he was angry as he could get.

David would kill Ethan. And then Ethan would be gone and every ounce of life David had would leave with him, knowing the pain he would cause to so many people. Because David, my David, couldn't live with himself, wouldn't be able to face his pack, his friends, his family, Ethan's family, and most of all, he wouldn't be able to face me. And how could _I_ be with him. How could I love someone who killed such a huge part of my existence.

I wasn't choosing, though to some it might seem that way. I couldn't choose, how could I choose between them. No I couldn't, not anymore, not knowing the love I had for each of them. A love, that ironically, was as different as they were. But it didn't matter to me. I love them both, each for different reasons. And I would do what needed to be done to save them, save them from each other and themselves.

I knew. I knew I had made my decision, what needed to be done. I knew this wasn't going to be easy, this wasn't going to be a fairytale, not that it ever was, and when it was over, I would no longer be the girl I once was.

ETHAN'S POV

It was good to be home. To finally have Mom and Dad and my brother and sisters. I'd managed to stay away from _her_ for a week, feeling quite honestly like I'd lost her to David. It was bittersweet, in a sense, knowing that she could finally be happy. I knew, though, that this wasn't over with David. I wanted to be able to put this behind me, but he wasn't going to allow it.

I'd grown up since the last time I'd been in La Push, and fighting like a little boy whose toy had been stolen didn't appeal to me in the least. The only thing that mattered to me anyway was Trisha's happiness. Not that I wanted to have lost her to my former BFF, but hey, what can you do?

I spent that peaceful week doing whatever the hell I wanted. If I wanted to go out, I went out. If I wanted to phase, I did. I didn't worry about David. If he wanted me, he knew how to find me, and if he wanted me dead, then so be it.

Today was one of those days when I decided to explore. I walked through the forest, stopping to spend time meditating and admiring the beauties of nature I'd missed in South America. I went to the apartment above Quil's shop. I hung out with Brady for a bit, not really wanting to, but Seth refused to leave his room while I was there, and at least this way I could lay down the law for Brady as to his intentions for my baby sister. It was bittersweet though, knowing that Seth had once offered me a place of refuge and now wanted nothing to do with me. My final stop was just for old times sake, another reminder of my past, something I could try but could never escape. I decided to end today's expedition at the library.

As usual, the library was completely quiet, void of all but a few high school kids, obviously less than thrilled to be here. I couldn't help but notice the few elderly men in a back corner reading romance novels, strategically placed behind hunting and fishing magazines.

Then I caught the scent. That damn scent.

"Fuck," I whispered to myself, hearing _her_ humming and smiling, shelving books in the Fiction section. I should've turned around and ran like a freakin' Leah Clearwater (who was the fastest wolf I could think of at the moment).

"La, la, la, la, l…" she saw me.

"Shit, fuck, shit," I mumbled under my breath. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. There Trisha stood, with a copy of _Brave New World_ in one hand and _1984_ in the other. She nodded her head to the side and pointed to an empty study room.

"Can we talk?" she mouthed to me and against my better judgment, I nodded affirmatively to her. She put the books down on a table and walked to the room, closing the blinds and shutting the door behind her. I waited about a minute to join her, walking in the door to be met by the warmest, most welcoming hug I had received since I got back to La Push. She felt amazing, I had forgotten how good she felt in my arms, the tingling current that ran between us.

"Happy to see me?" I asked, hugging her back, again against my better judgment.

"I am so happy you're okay!" She said, rifling her hands on my shirt almost like she was patting me down.

I could see the torment and internal strife in her eyes. "Ethan…"

"Ray, it's fine. You know, I knew you'd give in anyway." It was true. In the back of my mind, no matter how hard I wished that it wouldn't happen, I knew the imprint was too hard to break.

"Is that what you think? That I've forgotten you, forgotten how much I love you? That's not possible, Ethan. Everyday that you've been gone, I've thought about you, prayed for the day that you would come home, safe and sound," Trisha said. I started to look away from her, knowing if I stared in her eyes too long she would have me trapped, her love not letting me go. "If you thought that for a single moment, I didn't love you, then I should be the one doubting you." She started to walk out but I moved in front of the door, stopping her escape.

"You should never doubt me when I say that being gone, away from you, was torture. Ever minute that I tried to think of something else, tried to live in the moment someplace else, you were there. I carried you in my heart everywhere I went," I whispered.

She moved closer to me, stopping in front of me. "Ethan…I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I drove you away, I'm sorry I took away that part of your life…I never meant to…I'm so, so sorry…Please, please forgive me for hurting you…" Her words were intertwined with sobs. I could see it in her face and hear it in her words. She genuinely loved me. "When you left, I knew I'd made a huge mistake and I screamed for you to come back but you didn't. You were gone, I had pushed you away. I'm sorry…"

I lifted her chin with my finger and looked into her magnificent eyes, seeing their beauty even when filled to the brim with tears. She moved her hand to my cheek and I leaned into it. _God, how I loved this girl_, I thought to myself. She put her arms around my neck and I lifted her off the ground, pulling her close to me. She cried into my shoulder as I rubbed her back. She surprised me then, placing one single kiss on my neck and causing my bones to turn to mush. I pulled her lips from my neck and looked her in the eyes. I placed a hard, loving, passionate kiss on her lips, not wanting to let go, ever.

I pulled her to look at me. "I knew it was going to be difficult, coming back here. I knew seeing you with him would crush me. And I knew David would be pissed, but I didn't think David would want to kill me so bad, but whatever," I said in a very solemn voice, inhaling the exquisite scent coming from my Ray of sunshine.

"I've been thinking a lot about David's behavior. I'm not going to lie, it scares the shit out of me. Watching him circle you like that. It scares me, and I don't think you're not safe," a look of concern covered my beauty's face.

I tried to convince myself that she was wrong. More than anything I didn't want to worry Trisha, but deep down inside, I knew she was right. I couldn't in my right mind spend the rest of my life living on eggshells, worrying that David Uley was around the corner to pounce on me. It wouldn't be fair to anyone of the three of us.

I thought for a minute, trying to figure out what I should do, and it hit me. I had a flashback to a time long ago in Billy Black's garage. A promise we made to each other…if things got too bad, we'd run. Run as far as we could, start over as the people we wanted to be, not the people we were thrust into becoming. I could see it in her eyes, too. She knew that was our only option, the only way to save all three of us.

"Do you love me? _Love _me, love me? Because I have an idea, but I won't even tell you unless I know for sure," I said to her, looking deep in her eyes and knowing that even if her words might be a lie, her eyes would always tell the truth.

"I love you very much, Ethan," Trisha didn't take her eyes from mine and I knew she was telling the truth. I could see, too, that she knew that the wheels in my head were spinning and that, more than I probably realized, she knew the idea I had devised.

"You know what I'm thinking, don't you, Ray?" I asked her. Her doe eyes peaked out from under her sultry lashes. She nodded to me.

"I know you just got back, but…"I stopped her.

"I will go anywhere to keep us together and safe. I love you, Ray, I always have," I whispered in her ear, pulling her to my chest.

"I love you, too," she whispered.

Where the hell were we going to go? How were we going to pay for it and what were we going to do when we got there? This was too much shit for me to process right now. I had to go home, think, and then make a decision. One thing I was certain of, however, was that the sooner we got the fuck out of this town, the better.

"Tonight," I mumbled.

"Huh?" Trisha asked.

"We'll leave tonight," I answered her. "I need to go home and figure out where we're going, but I'll be at your house at midnight, okay?"

"Ethan," she whispered. She only said my name like this when she was going to say something she thought might disturb me or when she really wanted something.

"Yes, dear," I said into her hair.

"Don't get mad, okay?" She asked moving to look me in the eyes. "I have to see him, one last time. This is going to crush him. At least let me have the opportunity to spend a few more minutes with David," I couldn't deny her that, especially since my family was going to be devastated.

My Mom…my poor Mom…with the awkward teen life of Taylor and my inability to stay put, I know she was praying my sisters would be less of a handful. I would no doubt miss her more than anything about life here.

"Do what you need to do, Ray. I'll pick you up at midnight, your bedroom, okay?" I couldn't help but smile. We were going to finally be together, the way we should have been for the last few months. Romeo was finally getting his Juliet.

She smiled at me and leaned up to kiss me. I returned her smile, mid-kiss.

"Lace up your shoes, princess," I said to her. "It's gonna be quite the trip."

TRISHA'S POV

I had spent two more hours helping Helen at the library, before heading home at six. Six hours, that was all I had in La Push, and as happy as I was to be leaving with Ethan, I was a little scared. I had never been more than thirty minutes from my parents for any extended period of time in my entire life. Once, I tried to go to camp in Idaho and my parents had to turn around before they'd even crossed the state line to come get me. And Grandpa Billy. I couldn't bear the thought of being away from him for, well, for as long as it took to keep us all safe and alive. I would miss the person that had so quickly become my friend, confidant, and shoulder to cry on when everything seemed to have gone to shit, Mark. There would never be another Mark on this planet, no matter where I was or what I did.

One name hurt my heart more than any of the others…David. He had worked all day today and I called to see if I could come by for an hour or so. I was saying goodbye. He didn't know that yet, wouldn't until the morning, when he found the letter I had just finished writing him. He didn't deserve to feel what was coming, and I couldn't tell him why I was doing this. Why it was important for me to go was something he'd probably never really fully understand. Hell, I was part of the plan and I didn't even fully understand my rationalization of it.

We sat on the couch at the Uley's house and for the first time in a long time, he didn't stop me from touching him or him touching me. His hands were all over me, my ass, my breasts. His lips were on my neck, my mouth, my jaw. It was the most making out we'd done since we had sex. I unzipped his pants and shoved my hand in his boxers, kissing his lips like I would never let them go. I traced his face with my finger tips, not wanting to forget a single line or blemish. The moment I felt him start to release and his breathing changed, I started crying.

"What'd I do, Dollface? Was it too fast? Did you want me to hold out on you?" David asked, only making me cry harder.

"No, you're fine, David…I just…" I couldn't stop crying. "I need you to take me home now, okay?"

It was 10:30 and I wanted a chance to see my parents one last time, even if they were just asleep in their beds. David carried me out to the car bridal-style, trying to keep a smile on his face, but letting it go everytime I cried harder. We pulled up to the house and he kissed me on the cheek.

"Good night, my Dollface. I love you," he whispered to me.

"Good night, my David. I love you. Please don't forget that," I whispered the last part, knowing he would hear me anyway. I ran for the front porch before he could call me back.

As I crept in, seeing all the lights off, Dad popped up from the couch.

"I'm awake! I'm awake! Captain Commando's ready to go again, Rach!" he yelled.

"It's just me, Dad," I said. "That is just so wrong! Captain Commando? Who names their penis?" Obviously ironic since I had in fact named David's penis, Wolf.

Dad was wiping the sleep from his eyes. "Shows how much you know. I was referring to a famous cartoon that was popular when I was a kid."

I stopped and looked at him. "Seriously? A cartoon about a naked army dude? I don't think so. And what interest would Mom have in that?"

I heard him mumble something to the effect of "more interest than you'd think."

I ran to the kitchen, put a note for Mom and Dad and one for Grandpa Billy on the counter, and then back to Dad's place on the couch.

"Good night, Daddy," I said, hugging him around his neck, kissing his cheek, and placing one small red apple in his hands.

He smiled at me and kissed my cheek. "Night, Trishabug. I love you, baby girl."

I walked to their bedroom to see Mom fast asleep, with no interest in Captain Commando at the moment. I watched her for a minute, trying to do the same thing I had done with David, memorizing her face so I could take her with me everywhere I went.

"I love you so much, Mom, and I'm so sorry. Please don't hate me," I whispered next to her ear, feeling a few tears escape.

She rolled over and I thought I'd woken her. "Paul, shut your yap. I'm cold," she mumbled.

I kissed her cheek and went to my bedroom. I had fifteen minutes to pack a small bag. What the hell do you take with you when you runaway? Peanut butter and water? That didn't seem right. So I shoved two pairs of jeans and a couple t-shirts in my backpack, as well as my toothbrush, hairbrush, deodorant, and three pair of panties.

The knock at the window startled me and I opened it to Ethan's smiling face. I could see the redness in his eyes, too.

"You ready, my love?" he asked.

I touched my lips to his, softly and slowly. "Now or never," I smiled to him.

"You got your passport?" he asked.

I reached over to my bedside table and pulled it out putting it in the front pocket of my pack. He held his hand out to me. This was it. I took one last look around my childhood bedroom and then grabbed Ethan's hand. I had no clue where we were going, how we were going to get there. The only thing I knew was that I would be with Ethan, and that was all that mattered.

*NEXT CHAPTER: "Are you kidding me?"

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**Second AN: So, only the epilogue remains. Then on to the sequel, which is to be called **_**Make Up Your Mind**_**, from a Theory of a Deadman song and recommended by KupKakes 09!**


	24. Epilogue: Are You Kidding Me?

**AN: Pretty much all the vampires and a bit of the wolf-pack belong to SM.**

**I don't even own Trisha, Ethan, David, Taylor, Jordan or any of the other wolf kids. They belong to yay4shanghai. She's just letting me borrow them for a little while because she rocks and doesn't mind sharing!**

**Big shout out and thanks to my very amazingly awesome, totally rockin' friends, yay4shanghai (for being the most best beta, like, EVER) and KupKakes09, who gives me some kickass ideas and helps to keep me motivated! Don't forget to show them some love! **

**Also, check out these other authors: She's A Boozer, Call Me Embrys, Zuzak, Augustblack, NataliaNicolette, and twihardcaligurl.**

**I'm assisting augustblack and zuzak with another story called "Sunset." It's a Sam/Bella fic and the first chapter's already up! Be sure to give it a look because it won't disappoint. **

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Epilogue: "Are You Kidding Me?"

DAVID'S POV

I tried to go to sleep. But I couldn't. I looked at the clock seven times, each time my brain working harder to think about the endless amount of shit going on in my life.

12:23 a.m.—_I wonder if Paul knows that Trisha was here tonight?_

1:34 a.m.—_Aha! Found 'em! My love's purple panties! I was about to strangle someone thinking they'd stolen them._

1:59 a.m.—_I wonder if she's seen Ethan around? I know he's been walking around the reservation._

2:16 a.m.—_I wonder if Mark would be my second if I had to fight Ethan?_

2:37a.m.—_I bet Mark wouldn't be my second if Taylor was Ethan's second. But he'd probably choose Solace. Hmm…_

3:19 a.m.—_What did she mean when she said don't ever forget that? I should ask Mark. He's smart and he'd probably know exactly what she was thinking._

"Yo, Mark, man, wake your ass up," I said. I swear that boy could sleep through anything.

"What'd you want, David? It's three o'clock in the morning!" he said. I kept shaking him to make sure he was fully awake.

"Something's wrong…with Trisha, I think," I whispered.

"Why do you think that? She's not almost pregnant again, is she?" Mark asked.

"Fuck no! We haven't even had sex since that last time. Embry gave me an order, which more than kinda pisses me off, because if Jake were the Alpha he'd never do that."

"But he's not, so what's the problem that can't wait until mornin?"

"When I dropped her off, she was crying. Wouldn't even look at me. Then when she got out of the truck said she loved me and told me never to forget that. What'd you think that means?" The last thing she said when she got out of the truck was what confused me. I tried to get her to come back so I could ask what the hell she meant, but she was inside before I could even open my mouth.

I could tell Mark was thinking about it, trying to figure it out for me. He sat up for and looked at me. "What else happened?" He asked.

"Well, we were here, on the couch when Momma and Dad went to the grocery store. She jerked me off and then she just started bawlin' her eyes out. I thought maybe I'd done something wrong but she said everything was fine," I told him, trying to figure out for myself what the fuck happened in that ten minute period of her jerking me off to put her in tears.

He kept thinking for a second and then his eyes widened. "Oh, no," he mumbled. "Did she give you anything before she got out? Leave anything with you or in your truck?"

"No. Well, I don't know about the truck," I said.

"Go check right now. I'm calling Taylor," Mark pulled the phone from next to his bed.

I bolted down the stairs and rummaged through my front seat. Nothing, nothing, nothing, and then…something…an envelope with _her _beautiful handwriting on it. _David_.

"Oh, shit!" I grabbed it and ran back upstairs. Mark was still talking to Taylor.

"Fuck, Taylor! This is going to kill him," Mark turned to face away from me, while I fumbled to open the envelope. I pulled out a light purple sheet of paper with Trisha's handwriting on it.

_My David,_

_I'm so sorry…I have to go…It isn't because I don't love you or that I wouldn't want to be with you…It's just…I love Ethan so much, more than I think anyone can realize…I can't change that and it's not fair to you for me to pretend otherwise…Please don't forget how much I love you and how much I treasure every moment we had together…You're strong and I know you'll be okay…I love you…_

_Love,_

_Your Dollface_

The paper fell out of my hands and I couldn't do anything but stare off into space. Mark was by my side in an instance.

"Bro, you okay?" he asked me.

"She left me. She didn't want me, Mark. I loved her! I know she was my imprint, but I loved her more than that. I loved her! And she left me," I started to sob. I'm a big dude and I'm sure I looked pretty weird to him, watching my face twist in pain.

"Goddamnit! Momma!" Mark yelled, as I laid down in the bed. This is how I imagined a little puppy that had been left by his owners on the side of the road would feel, abandoned, unloved, and unwanted. I curled to one side and let her words sink in. _It's not fair to you_…but it was fair for her to leave me, to pick him over me?

"Momma!" Mark yelled louder and I heard her footsteps on the stairs.

"Geez, Mark, it's three in the morning! You're gonna wake your sister," Momma said. She must've just then noticed me, all curled up in a ball. "David, are you okay?" I didn't say anything but I heard my crying get louder. "Mark, what the hell happened?"

Mark slid off the bed and picked up the letter. He handed it to Momma. "I just talked to Taylor. Ethan's gone too," Mark said.

"Sam! Sam! Get up here now!" Momma yelled down to Dad.

His footsteps were much harder than Momma's and I closed my eyes even tighter, not wanting my Dad to see me cry.

"What the fuck?!" Dad said.

"Read this," Momma shoved the letter to him. "Get me the phone, Mark."

I could hear Mark pick it up and Momma dial a number. I heard it ring a few times and then a sleepy, "Hello" come from the other end.

"Hey, Paul. Do me a favor and check Trisha's room, will ya?" Momma asked. "No, David's right here…I'm pretty sure she's with Ethan…Did she leave you a note or anything...yeah, go check…Hey, Rach…Just a little drama, nothing to worry about just yet…Okay, put Paul back on…She put it next to the bowl of apples…have you read it yet?...Come over right now…See you in five minutes."

I heard her hang up and dial the phone again. "Taylor, can I speak to your Mom, please…Hey, Kim…Did he leave you a note?...Have you read it?...Paul and Rachel are coming over, why don't you leave Taylor to watch the girls and you and Jared come over so we can figure this out?...Okay, see you in a bit."

"They both got letters. Paul said Trisha left one for Billy, too. They're coming over right now," Momma was talking to Dad but every single word sunk into me.

_She's gone and she's not coming back. We won't have our little Sarah or make love in the backseat of her Mustang. I won't get to watch her graduate. I won't see her in a beautiful white dress and I won't get to call her Trisha Uley. She chose him over me. I'll never touch her or see her or feel her again. I love her. I love her so much. My heart hurts._

I stayed on my bed, curled up. Momma sat at the my side, next to Mark, rubbing my back and letting me cry.

"David, sweetie, it'll be okay, okay? We'll find her, okay? She'll come back, baby," she whispered.

"No…I don't want to find her. She doesn't want me. She wants him and I won't drag her back here screaming. I love her too much for that," I whispered.

There was a loud banging noise on the door downstairs and Dad left the room to answer it. I knew it was Paul and Rachel, I could smell him all the way upstairs. Before they were even all the way in the door, Kim and Jared pulled up.

"Fan-fucking-tastic! Let's invite the whole fucking rez to my heartbreak," I mumbled.

"They might be able to help," Mark said.

"Help what?" I asked, opening my eyes to him, stopping the tears. He didn't get a chance to answer before the whole gang had made their way upstairs. 

The look on Rachel's face was…tragic. She couldn't stop crying and Paul actually had to carry her upstairs, himself looking like someone had stabbed him the heart. Jared was holding tight to Kim, who immediately ran to Momma, quickly embraced in a hug.

"I don't get it. They hadn't even seen each other since he'd been home," Jared said.

I rolled over and looked at him, glaring. "Doesn't matter. They're gone anyway," I snapped at him.

Paul spoke up. "David, I'm so…"

I cut him off. "Don't you fucking say you're sorry! You have no idea!" I got off the bed and started moving towards Paul.

"David, son, you need to calm down!" Dad said, noticing my body start to shake.

"No! I won't calm down! I'm fucking mad as hell! And I hate this! I don't fucking want to be a wolf anymore! I don't want to be anything!" I was screaming so loud I could almost see the neighbors' lights flicker on. I had cornered Paul and could hear the growls coming from his chest. It didn't matter though. I was bigger. And stronger. He hadn't phased in a few years and it was all too easy for me to grab his shirt and drag him out front. I wanted to fight. I needed to fight. Someone. Anyone. And Paul, the father of the love of my life, just happened to be there.

I threw him on the ground, turning around to phase, and I heard a "POP!" sound. I phased immediately and the big wolf in front of me showed his teeth.

_David, this is stupid. I'm not the one you want to fight! _Paul thought.

We circled each other a few times before I lunged at him. Damn if Paul Wise wasn't still one of the best wolf fighters. He had me on my back, his teeth at my throat in no time.

_Fuck it! Do it, Paul! Kill Me! PLEASE! She's gone…I will never be me again! Just do it!_ I screamed in my head. I didn't necessarily want to die. I just didn't really want to live without Trisha anymore. I'd tried that, and it sucked.

_David, bro, please don't say that! What would I do without you?!_ Mark had phased and added to the tension in my head.

_What, you mean you wouldn't find some else to cut down and make feel like an idiot! That's all I am to you anyway! Every chance you get, you remind me of just how stupid you think I am!_ I thought, pushing Paul off of me and glaring at my brother, who stood a few feet from me.

_That's not true! I love you! You know that, you're my big brother!_ I could hear the hurt in Mark's thoughts as he began showing memories of us as kids, then of us fighting the Wahalla brothers together, of us in the truck with Trisha.

I hit back with images of him and Taylor spouting out cheap shots at my intelligence or him yelling at me when I interrupted his phone calls. _I'm nothing but a joke to you. No worries._ I thought. And then I ran like hell.

Why I'd chosen to go off on Mark like that, especially when I'd been pinned to the ground by Paul, I don't know. It was like every single thing little flaw I had was shoved in my face by that fucking letter. Knowing that Ethan was smarter and thinking that to Mark, I was just a punching bag. Fuck, I _was_ just a punching bag in most cases to most people.

I ran to Canada and tried to get those damn wolf voices out of my head. Other than Mark's, Seth's voice was the loudest, saying things I know Dad was telling him to. I stayed a wolf for six months. I phased back a few times, but it didn't last long because the anger only made me phase back. I learned a few things during that time.

First, I don't know why rabbit is considered a delicacy because it tastes like rubber shit.

Second, watching two elk get it on is not cool. In fact, it's beyond disturbing.

Third, bathing in streams and rivers ain't that bad.

Fourth, no matter where you go, those damn wolves will always be in your head.

Fifth, no matter where I went, what I did, what I saw, I still missed Trisha. I still loved her, dammit, and if I was gonna be miserable, I might as well do it at home with the people I love.

I ran home to be met by Mark, apologizing, again, for like the thousandth time since I'd left. Momma gave me kisses all over my face and yelled at me to never do that again. Dad hugged me and helped me take care of some major gashes on my side that weren't healing as fast as they should've.

The Wises came over not long after I got back and they looked horrible. I wondered if Trisha knew what she'd done to them, that her momma was absolutely miserable and because of that, Paul was too. Not to mention, listening him talk to Billy one day, he was crying that his pain wasn't just because of Rachel but that he wanted his daughter back. I thought for a moment that maybe I should let my idea of not bringing her back go, but I didn't want her if she was gonna be all mopey and pissed that she was here. We'd learn to adjust, we'd done it before and we'd do it again.

Mark gave me a journal when I came back to help me relieve stress. I'd been so unstable for the first few weeks I was back and would phase at the drop of a hat. That was how I started to heal.

DAVID'S JOURNAL'S POV

_Day 185 since Trisha left me: Finally wore the same clothes all day and didn't rip anything. Yahoo! _

_Day 190 since Trisha left me: I thought too much about Trisha today and Mark had to come pick me up from the grocery store after I destroyed all the damn apples in sight. That was interesting._

_Day 215 since Trisha left me: Mark asked me to go to Port Angeles with him and Jordan to see some foreign movie at the college. He failed to mention that I was going to have to read through the whole thing. Only good thing about that damn French movie: naked French chicks! Apparently, it's rude if you shout "Woo Hoo!" when they start taking their clothes off. I swear, if I wasn't a wolf, I'd have a freakin' bruise where Jordan elbowed me in the ribs._

_Day 300 since Trisha left me: Got my old job back. I'm still the assistant to that contractor Joe Samis in Forks. But he's giving me more responsibility and I actually get to oversee a small house project near Port Angeles._

_Day 330 since Trisha left me: Promotion! I'm ready, Promotion! I did such a kick-ass job on that house in Port Angeles that Joe's letting me supervise the construction of a new bookstore in Forks. Super stoked for that but don't like books. They remind me too much of her._

_Day 344 since Trisha left me: Mark gave me a book today about Native American dwellings or something like that. Said it might help in my construction career. I liked it and thanked him for it. I liked looking at the different houses different peoples have lived in. Then he and Taylor and Jordan made me watch this documentary on the construction of the Space Needle in Seattle. Normally I would've been bored to tears but it was cool to hang with Mark and Jordan. I still feel a little tense around Taylor, even though he's been really cool to me since Ethan skipped town with the love of my life, I still remember his jabs at me. The highlight of the evening was us eating two whole fucking apple pies (Trisha's favorite) while we watched the movie, which is gonna majorly piss Momma off when she gets home, but what can you do?_

_Day 365 since Trisha left me: Is it normal for it to still hurt so bad? I shouldn't miss her anymore but I can't not still feel a little empty inside. It's been a year. A whole year. We haven't heard a word and I still don't want to go searching. I won't. _

_Day 371 since Trisha left me: Hung out with the most awesome brother on the planet. One of the only positives of this whole fucking situation is that Mark has been here for me. I can see that he misses Trisha, too. They had become really good friends and I know he misses that._

_Day 399 since Trisha left me: We finally finished the book store in Forks. I hid this little apple shaped rock in the cobblestone floor. I put it there for Trisha. Only I'll really know its there but that's all that really matters anyway. _ _I bought a few books to read. Mark reads lots of books on Buddhism and I've been wondering about different cultures and religions so I picked up this book about Catholic Saints. It's pretty cool. I like reading the stories about ordinary people that did extraordinary things. Makes me feel like I have some sort of purpose I may not have realized yet. _

_Day 425 since Trisha left me: I got a big raise at work! I've been promoted again, too, and my boss says he's really proud of all the hard work I've been doing. He's thinking of giving me my own team to do bigger jobs with. I'm working with him right now but on a shopping mall in Port Angeles. He's split the work up amongst two teams, his (which includes me acting as his assistant but pretty much doing everything) and this other guy who I affectionately refer to as Doug the Douche because he reminds me a lot of Ethan and it takes everything in me not to punch that asshole in the face, and he thinks he's right about everything, again, just like that Wahalla brat. I haven't been getting much sleep lately though. The pack's been short a few wolves with Quil and Ethan gone and Mark at school most of the time. So I've picked up extra shifts when I can. I like helping out with the younger wolves and it takes my mind off of everything. _

_Day 460 since Trisha left me: Work is progressing well on the shopping mall and I feel like I'm making a name for myself. I'm not living in any shadows and I'm not being compared to anyone else. It's just me and my work._

_Day 500 since Trisha left me: Still working on the shopping mall. I picked up another book, this one about Cathedrals in Europe. I think I saw the one from the pictures of Quil and Claire's wedding and it was beautiful. Of all the styles, I like the Gothic cathedrals the best. So much detail and symbolism. So beautiful and each unique. Much like the wolves, though I'd never tell any of them they were beautiful._

_Day 550 since Trisha left me: My entries are kinda not regular. Work keeps me busy and I'm still increasing my time with the pack. It gives me something to do and I like the pride I feel with the pack. I'm still working on the shopping mall but we should be nearing the end. My first big project, even if I am just an assistant, I feel like I have a little ownership in it. Mark and Jordan took me to this fancy restaurant in Port Angeles to celebrate, __we ate lobster and got to wear these awesome bib thingies. It was freakin' am-azing._

_Day 582 since Trisha left me: The shopping mall is finished and I was sad that Trisha wasn't there to see it. I know that she would be proud. _

_Day 601 since Trisha left me: Today, when I went for coffee during work, I ran into Tiffany, my ex-girlfriend. We talked for a minute about her sister, but the thing that got me…she asked me out! Said she heard I'd been down for awhile, didn't know the specifics but asked if I would go to dinner with her tomorrow night. I told her yes…_

_Day 602 since Trisha left me: Dinner with Tiffany. Awesomely different. It was nice to enjoy time with someone else. We didn't talk about Trisha, we didn't talk about wolf stuff, we talked about me and her and life. We were just ourselves. And I felt like a regular guy…_

_Day 633 since Trisha left me: I took Tiffany on a picnic near the cliffs. We've seen each other everyday since that first date and I guess you could say we're kinda a couple. Tonight, I kissed her. Pulled her close to me and placed my lips on hers. It was different than any of Trisha's kisses. Just not what I'd become so used to. It was nice to have someone react to me and want me without worrying about someone else popping up and taking her from me…_

_Day 667 since Trisha left me: I did something tonight. I was at Tiffany's apartment, relaxing and watching a movie. I couldn't help it, all the fucking wolves have been thinking about nothing but sex the last few days. I swear it's like fucking Spring fever and it finally made me snap. Tiff got up to get something to drink and said, "want some?" I grabbed her and, well, it kinda went from there. We did "it" right there on the living room floor and, I was a little rougher than I should've been. She was on top most of the time, so I didn't have to worry about crushing her. But I bit her…On the neck, really hard and she yelped in pain. I felt bad and couldn't stop apologizing. She kept saying, "It's fine. That's what they make concealer for." I felt bad for hurting her but I felt bad for another reason, too. The whole time I was with her, in her, holding her, one person was in my mind and I started missing her more than I had in a long time._

_Day 672 since Trisha left me: I finally got approval from the boss to run my own construction team. We've started on an office complex and I'm the boss. I'm in charge. I haven't been this excited in a long time and I know this is going to be awesome._

_Day 688 since Trisha left me: I can feel something in the air. Something is going to change soon. I can't figure out what it is but I can sense it and even see it in the other wolves' thoughts and feelings. It's a bad feeling and it has all of us on edge. Embry's increased patrols but no one has caught an off scent or anything. It's just a feeling. And from our thoughts, whatever it is that's coming, isn't going to be good._

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**Second A/N: On to the sequel, which is to be called **_**Make Up Your Mind**_**, from a Theory of a Deadman song and recommended by KupKakes 09! This is how much I love you guys: I will post the prologue to the sequel tomorrow, yes, that's right, tomorrow! It starts here where David ends his entries.**

**I'm so excited to change the story status to complete and I want to thank each and everyone of you who read and reviewed, or just read! You have no idea how much it means to have such sincere readers! Thank you, thank you, thank you!**


	25. An Author's Note

**Another Author's Note**

**(This one's a good thing, though!)**

Hey guys! I want to say a big thank you to all of you for the encouraging words, and I will most likely be continuing Make Up Your Mind. (I'm working on the next chapter now, but it's a little slow going)

That said, I have a huge favor to ask. Keep Your Hands to Yourself has been nominated for an Indie TwiFic Award! I have no idea who nominated me, but thank you so much! I'm pleased as punch and it's made my month! Anyway, I am asking for you all to please, please vote for the story. Go to theindietwificawards{dot}com/vote{dot}aspx and check the little box next to Keep Your Hands to Yourself in the Best Alternative Universe WIP category.

Voting will take place from July 9 at noon EST, until July 13 at Midnight EST.

Again, thank you all for being such wonderful dedicated readers. Look for a Make Up Your Mind update soon!

Infinite Hugs and Kisses,

Jen


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